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Divided Emotions - Literature (13) - Nairaland

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Re: Divided Emotions by Omolola1(f): 9:25pm On Dec 19, 2012
JAMES SHOULDERED his way through the throngs of people at the Muritala Mohammed airport, anxious to meet his brother, who was picking him in front of the terminal."

"Bernard!" He shouted when he saw the black Pathfinder. He sprinted over to the car. "I owe you for this, especially when you had to battle five o'clock traffic."

"Hey, bro, it isn't like I don't want to see you or anything, but it would be nice to get a little more notice. Do you mind if I ask what in the heck is going on with you?"

James couldn't answer him. Since the scene in Sonia's living room last night, his world had exploded in his face. He had a sickness in his gut that wasn't about to go away.

"The last time you flew down here, you didn't tell anybody. Today at lunch my secretary informs me that I have to pick you up at six o'clock, but no one else is supposed to know. Mom and dad would get really mad if they found out you were in town again and didn't phone them. As it is, I had to make some story to Tamara about working late tonight."

"Like I said, I owe you. Big time."

Bernard sighed. "Where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere, but not too far from the airport. I have to get back to Abuja tonight."

"How about we just pull off at the first exit and sit at a Stop sign?"


"Whoa. You are in bad shape." As they wound in and out of the traffic leaving the terminal, Bernard kept looking over at him. "Did you and Sonia have a fight?"

"No. Last night we got engaged for the second time."
. . .Last night showed him a whole new meaning of the word "terror."

"Second time?"

"It's a long story."

"Spill it!"

"Hell, Ben. Her husband didn't die in the war. After seven years as a POW, he's back home in Abuja."


Bernard pulled off the road and braked in front of a primary school.

"I saw a clip about that on the news a while back! But I never would've associated him with Sonia. James - look me in the eye and tell me you're putting me on."

James turned his head and faced his brother.
"Oh Lord...you're not!" He reached across the seat to give him a brotherly hug. "No wonder you couldn't just tell me this on the phone."

James raked a hand through his hair. "I think I'm going to lose her, Ben. If that happ..."

"Shut up, James. Just start talking to me!"

"She loved me, Ben. She really did. We were making it. On that cruise she finally agreed to marry me. The first night out, the band was playing requests. Suddenly the lead singer asked if there was a James Okoye in the room. Naturally I wondered what Sonia was up to.
"When I stood up, he announced that the next song was dedicated to me. Then he called Sonia to the microphone. She whispered something in his ear, and he said into the mike, 'she's expecting a marriage proposal when the song is over. Are you ready, James?' They played Eric Clapton's 'Wonderful Tonight.'" The words of that song would be forever impressed in James' memory.
"Before she'd even sat down, I had that ring on her finger. At the end of the cruise, I drove her and Divine to her door, knowing that the rest of my life was going to be pure happiness because Sonia and I were getting married in June.
"Six hours later I got a phone call. Her husband, Sergeant Kenneth Brown, had been freed from captivity and was on his way home to Hill Air Force Base. Sonia had to go. She'd call me later."

Bernard groaned, then suddenly leaned across the seat to grasp James' shoulder. "Tell me the rest. Don't stop until I've heard every damn thing that's eating you alive!"

James heard the love in his brother's voice. Bernard had been at his side when James' former fiancee died at the hospital. There wasn't another human being who understood him the way Bernard did. James had repressed his feelings for so long it served as a catharsis to be able to confide in his brother.

Once he'd begun, he didn't stop until he'd told him every detail and had admitted his deepest fear. "I have the gut feeling Sonia's falling in love with her husband all over again."

"But that's crazy, James! Last night she agreed to wear your ring. You made specific wedding plans."

"I know. I know," James said. "But you didn't hear what I heard in Sonia's voice when her mother-in-law started in about the tortures Kenneth had been subjected to. What I heard came straight from Sonia's soul. It sounded like love."

"Does that really surprise you? He was her husband all those years. But they're getting a divorce and she loves you, wants a life with you now."

"I know Sonia loves me. But you didn't see what I saw today at the university."

"Okay. What did you see?"

"She was talking to Kenneth. They didn't know I was standing there watching. Have you ever been near a couple who are so involved with each other they have no awareness of anything else around them?"

"James, you're paranoid. Not without good reason, but I honestly think you're looking for trouble where there isn't any."

"No. I know what I saw. This was different. There was a light shining in Sonia's eyes. I never saw anything like it. She even acted different. I could hardly believe it was her."

"What you saw is the way Sonia responds to the man she married. If he saw you and Sonia together, he'd say the same thing...that she doesn't seem like the same Sonia to him...because you bring out certain things in her that he doesn't."

"Those two had a particular chemistry together. They made a child. You and she have another kind of chemistry. You'll create your own child one day."

His brother had a lot of wisdom. "What you're saying makes perfect sense. But I have this awful feeling that one day after we're married, Sonia will wake up and wish she was with Kenneth. He's never going to go away! They share a son. Divine will be around as a constant reminder of their marriage. For the past two years, I've done everything but stand on my head trying to erase his shadow. Now he's back...in the flesh!"

"James, thousands of couples are in second marriages and they work beautifully. Once you and Sonia are living together as husband and wife, you'll forge bonds so strong nothing will threaten your love."

"Those thousands of women weren't married to Kenneth Brown first."

"Aside from the fact that he was a victim of war, which turned him into a hero, why is he such a threat to you? I don't get it."

James looked over at his brother. "The truth?"

He nodded. "Is there any other way?"

James squeezed his arm. "Her husband reminds me of a man I pretty well idolize."

"In other words, if you didn't hate Kenneth Brown's guts, you and he would probably be friends."

"He's got many of your qualities, Ben."

Bernard eyed him soulfully for a minute, then patted his shoulder. "I appreciate those kind words, bro. But if what you say is true, you've got something even more remarkable going for you. Despite the fact that her husband's a paragon..." He gave a self-depreciating grin "she's picked you for her husband."

"Maybe. Then again, the fact that Kenneth filed for divorce may have made me the winner through default, and you're looking at Sonia's consolation prize. I don't doubt she'd go through with our wedding. With her noble heart, she wouldn't dream of hurting me again. But something deep inside tell me Kenneth would always be in bed with us. I couldn't handle that." His voice was harsh with pain.

Bernard had no ready comeback. His expression grew solemn. "James, if you're really that unsure of Sonia's feelings, if your gut's telling you something's wrong, then you need to have it out with her. I mean a knock-down, drag-out, bottom-line session. No holds barred. You know what I'm saying?"

James nodded.

. . .Oh yes, Bernard. I know exactly what you're saying. Sonia might have had a legitimate excuse to go off with Kenneth and Divine today. But something tells me she wanted to be with them. . .

He sucked in his breath. "That's why I came down here to see you, Ben. Before I left Abuja, I'd half made up my mind to confront her...to get inside her heart and soul, even if I had to fight my way past every defense. I just needed to hear you confirm it."


WHEN SONIA HEARD the front doorbell ring at eleven o'clock, she knew it had to be James. Divine had gone to bed an hour ago, but he wasn't asleep. Kenneth hadn't phoned yet. Something must have detained him. The waiting was killing both of them, for different reasons.

James hadn't called, either. All evening she'd been expecting word from him, yet she'd been dreading that conversation because she'd made a promise to Divine. Spending all her free time with her son means she wouldn't be seeing anyone else. Including James. Especially James. She could just imagine his reaction.

It wasn't fair to him. Nothing had ever been fair to him. They'd just gotten engaged for the second time. Now she'd have to ask for his understanding about not seeing him in the evenings. Even a man as marvellous as James had his limits. She knew this would be pushing them, but Divine had to be her first priority. Keeping her son emotionally stable with Kenneth away translated as cruelty to James, a no-win situation. Sonia honestly didn't know how much stress she could take. As for James. . .

With a mixture of reluctance and trepidation, she walked to the door and called out, asking who it was.

"It's James."

. . .Something was wrong.
He didn't say, "its me, sweetheart. I've missed you."

She opened the door, expecting him to reach for her the way he always did. It threw her when he remained in place, almost aloof. "I'd almost given up on you tonight. Come in, darling."

After closing the door, she headed for the living room, waiting for his arms to slide around her waist and pull her against him. To her surprise, he came to a standstill just inside the entry to the room, his hands on his hips.

"Has something serious happened at work? Is there trouble? She was starting to feel anxious.


The one-syllable answer filled her with a new form of dread. "So you got everything straightened out with Emeka?"

"I lied to you, Sonia. I needed some time to think, so I made up an excuse for not having dinner with you."

She shook her head sadly. "Why did you have to lie to me? Why didn't you just tell me you wanted to be alone? I would've understood."

"I know you would've. But I didn't want to alarm you, not when you're dealing with so much here at home."

"James, I realize everything is precarious right now." Her voice trembled slightly, despite herself. "In fact, there's another favor I have to ask of you, and I'm afraid to ask of it. But I know we'll eventually get past all this, because we love each other."

"What favour?" He demanded, his features taut.

"Kenneth left for Dubai today with his parents. He'll be gone ten days and he's worried about Divine's reaction. That's why he came to see me at the university, to decide how best to tell Divine."

She moistened her lips nervously when she realised James wasn't going to help her out. "Kenneth told Divine his grandmother needed her son, just as I needed Divine. So they made a deal Kenneth would spend time with his mother, Divine would spend time with me."

"And nobody else." James filled in the blanks. "So I'm to get lost for ten days while you fulfill your part of the bargain."

"Don't put it that way, James. He was only thinking of Divine. It worked. There were no hysterics."

"But there will be if I step foot in this house before the ten days are up. Under the circumstances, I'm surprised you bothered to let me in." By now his face was completely drained of colour. "It looks to me as if from now on I'd better check with Kenneth before I make plans with my future wife."

He was out of the room and the front door so fast she had to run to catch up with him. She'd just managed to slide into the passenger seat as he got behind the wheel and started the ignition.

"Get out of the car, Sonia."

"No! Not until we talk."

"I'm off-limits, remember?"

"I know it sounds horrible. It's just that Divine's been a different boy since Kenneth came home. If everything can stay on an even keel until Kenneth returns home on vacation with his folks, you and I won't have to worry about Divine anymore."

"Until the next time," he ground out.

"What do you mean?"

James' hands tightened on the steering wheel. "There will always be a next time where Divine's concerned, Sonia. You're his mother. For the duration of our lives, you will always put him first. He'll pit us against each other to test your love for him. He'll try to make you choose between us. I'm not saying that to be cruel, I'm saying it because it's true.

"Today you made a promise to him. I realize you have to keep it. In fact, you're breaking it by being out here in the car with me."

"James, I need to talk to you, darling. Please, will you take time off tomorrow to be with me while Divine's at school? As soon as he walks out that door, I'll drive over to your house." She paused, then added, "I can always go to the University later to work on my grading."

James hesitated for a moment, then nodded. "I'll expect you at nine."

She waited for him to take her in his arms. "A-aren't you even going to kiss me good-night?"

"No. If I start kissing you, I won't be able to stop. Go in the house. Now!"

With tears blinding her, she got out of the car and raced up to the house. She heard a screech of tires as James drove away. The sound had a kind of desperate finality about it.

She had expected way too much of James. He was the one who felt fragile right now. She had to do something, quickly. Tomorrow they'd talk, and she'd try to reassure him...but while she stood there in a quandary, the phone rang. She dashed over and picked up the receiver.



"Sonia?" Came the deep voice. Her heart began to race. "I'm sorry it's so late."

To hear Kenneth over the phone sounding so natural and familiar made it feel as though they'd never suffered a seven-year separation.

"Are you all right?" She asked anxiously.

"I'm fine." There was a pause. "If you're worrying that this is something war-related, then stop."

"Thank heaven! When I think what you've lived through...I wish I had a magic pill I could give you to make it all go away. I can't..."


She was so choked up she could hardly talk. "I can't get the things your mom told me out of my mind. Oh, Ken...Ken... When you flew off on the plane, I suffered a thousand fears, but the reality is so much worse. I wish there was something. . ."

By now she was sobbing.

"It's over, Sonia," he murmured.

He could read her thoughts. He always could.

"Oh, Kenneth...I've always loved you. So much. I never wanted to hurt you. I'm so sorry for what you've had to endure and so proud of you at the same time. I'm...I'm in awe of you, Ken. It's such a helpless feeling to know what happened to you, and not be able to do one thing about it."

Another silence.

"You can do something for me now."

"What's that? Anything."

"Get on with the rest of your life and be happy. Don't look back."

Another paroxysm of tears threatened. "Where do you find the strength to say that to me?"

"In prison I discovered many things. That God lives, that life is fleeting and precious. I plan to make the most of the time I have left. That's what you need to do, too, sweetheart."

. . .But you're going to do it without me. I won't be there. I can't bear it. . .

"Mom? Is that Dad?" Divine came bounding up to her. When he saw her wet face, his crumpled, too.

"What's wrong? Has something happened to Dad?"

He started to cry.

"Just a minute, Ken," she said in a gravely tone. "Here's Divine."

1 Like

Re: Divided Emotions by Hummingbird: 10:26pm On Dec 19, 2012
Oh poor Sonia..cnt imagine wat she'l b going 2ru...
Team Kenneth al d way sha
9c work Lord..shd we b xpctn anoda upda8 nyt winkOh poor Sonia..cnt imagine wat she'l b going 2ru...
Team Kenneth al d way sha
9c work Lord..shd we b xpctn anoda upda8 nyt
Re: Divided Emotions by Oluwafunmilayo95(f): 10:42pm On Dec 19, 2012
Splendid cheesy

Lola pls update your diary..
I want some T-gisting cool
Re: Divided Emotions by PetDancer(f): 10:50pm On Dec 19, 2012
Wowwwwww...this story is getting more interesting.... I can't wait to get to d end
Re: Divided Emotions by Dumzii: 11:12pm On Dec 19, 2012
This Sonia character is begining to annoy me! Make up your mind already. U keep preaching love to the 2men

1 Like

Re: Divided Emotions by DAvIt0(m): 11:44pm On Dec 19, 2012
Dumzii: This Sonia character is begining to annoy me! Make up your mind already. U keep preaching love to the 2men

abi ooooo
Re: Divided Emotions by naturecome: 2:09am On Dec 20, 2012
The character "Sonia" is beginning to seem dishonest. She sees that James is having legitimate doubts about the relationship and she swoops in on Kenneth with "love" that was not there before. Why did she not profess this love when she met him earlier in school?
I hope the end of the story does not get anti-climatic after this suspense... undecided

1 Like

Re: Divided Emotions by Nobody: 6:34am On Dec 20, 2012
Well, the emotional division is beginning to feel disturbing . Enough of this teasing already.
Re: Divided Emotions by Omolola1(f): 7:10am On Dec 20, 2012
naturecome: The character "Sonia" is beginning to seem dishonest. She sees that James is having legitimate doubts about the relationship and she swoops in on Kenneth with "love" that was not there before. Why did she not profess this love when she met him earlier in school?
I hope the end of the story does not get anti-climatic after this suspense... undecided

The story would be ending soon!
Re: Divided Emotions by AfricaFace(f): 8:36am On Dec 20, 2012
Kenneth is becoming too harsh.
he is not even appreciating Sonia's empathy for him.. i am begining to dislike Kenneth

1 Like

Re: Divided Emotions by jt2010: 10:19am On Dec 20, 2012
AfricaFace: Kenneth is becoming too harsh.
he is not even appreciating Sonia's empathy for him.. i am begining to dislike Kenneth
embarassed embarassed angryYou women lipsrsealed sabi form victim sha, even when you are not, so you expect Kenneth to appreciate her more than what he is doing now despite her loving two men and give up on him even after his returned from war. Abeg free Kenneth jor grin cool tongue The Kenneth character is living a more realistic, which means he appreciate what he see and feels and not what he thinks Sonia thinks!!! wink cheesy grin
Re: Divided Emotions by punche(m): 2:11pm On Dec 20, 2012
NOT BAD.....
Re: Divided Emotions by punche(m): 3:09pm On Dec 20, 2012
kenneth is just complicating things........ rubbish
Re: Divided Emotions by kilokeys(m): 4:27pm On Dec 20, 2012
Maybe james and kenneth shld just marry and leave the confused girl out of the picture
Re: Divided Emotions by Omolola1(f): 4:37pm On Dec 20, 2012
kilokeys: Maybe james and kenneth shld just marry and leave the confused girl out of the picture

Re: Divided Emotions by naturecome: 5:45pm On Dec 20, 2012
kilokeys: Maybe james and kenneth shld just marry and leave the confused girl out of the picture

Lol....that is a good thought smiley
Re: Divided Emotions by AfricaFace(f): 8:02pm On Dec 20, 2012
punche: kenneth is just complicating things........ rubbish

thank you for seeing the right thing.
Re: Divided Emotions by Charmin1(f): 8:09pm On Dec 20, 2012
Nice story Lola. More ink to your pen. Where can i find more stories to read?
Re: Divided Emotions by kilokeys(m): 9:21pm On Dec 20, 2012
In real life... Love is a bitch.. I am on james side.. But.. If d guy keeps off the world wld be a more organized place... Let the nuclear family be.. he might still be bleeping her anyway.
Re: Divided Emotions by kilokeys(m): 9:24pm On Dec 20, 2012
kilokeys: In real life... Love is a bitch.. I am on james side.. But.. If d guy keeps off the world wld be a more organized place... Let the nuclear family be.. he might still be bleeping her anyway.
chai.. Mods.. Love is nt a naugty lady.. I said love is a biat.ch... Shey i no talk again ni... I wonder how many words dem don help omolola change sef.. Mtchhew
Re: Divided Emotions by emygreat747(m): 9:30pm On Dec 20, 2012
omolola dear,u r the one keeping me awake o!!,ouch!!!,just hope she is nt sleeping,guess she must be tired.
Re: Divided Emotions by AfricaFace(f): 9:41pm On Dec 20, 2012
emygreat747: omolola dear,u r the one keeping me awake o!!,ouch!!!,just hope she is nt sleeping,guess she must be tired.
Me 2
Re: Divided Emotions by DAvIt0(m): 9:50pm On Dec 20, 2012
Tonight's dose oooo Omolola
Re: Divided Emotions by Chirolechick: 10:14pm On Dec 20, 2012
Sweeetie ds vigil haff do na, hlp us by givin us 2nyt's dosage, hope wok ws great?
Re: Divided Emotions by Splendblex(f): 10:46pm On Dec 20, 2012
chai.. Mods.. Love is nt a naugty lady.. I said love is a biat.ch... Shey i no talk again ni... I wonder how many words dem don help omolola change sef.. Mtchhew
grin ;Dlol@ naugty lady
Re: Divided Emotions by Omolola1(f): 10:50pm On Dec 20, 2012
Am sorry, went to church straight from work for Carol service.

Just got home! Am so tired.
Tomorrow is another day
Re: Divided Emotions by Hummingbird: 11:22pm On Dec 20, 2012
Aite dear..apology aceptd...2mao is anoda day...bt u didnt invit me 2d xmas carol

1 Like

Re: Divided Emotions by emygreat747(m): 6:20pm On Dec 21, 2012
Lola hope u'r gud just curious nd wanted to knw wen we shud xpect d next update.
Re: Divided Emotions by Omolola1(f): 7:51pm On Dec 21, 2012
emygreat747: Lola hope u'r gud just curious nd wanted to knw wen we shud xpect d next update.

Hopefully tonight!
Re: Divided Emotions by Oluwafunmilayo95(f): 8:02pm On Dec 21, 2012

Hopefully tonight!

Hopefully? cry
Re: Divided Emotions by Omolola1(f): 9:59pm On Dec 21, 2012
THE BLARING SOUND of the test pattern on the TV brought Sonia awake. Six in the morning. She sat up on the couch with a tension headache and cramps in her stomach. Today she had to face James.

When she hadn't been able to get to sleep last night, she lay on the couch to watch TV, hoping it would relax her, get her mind off things. Divine had wandered in to say good-night again, his peace of mind restored after talking to Kenneth for half an hour.

After staggering to her feet, she left the living room, bleary-eyed, in search of Divine. He needed to get up and take a bath. She needed one, too. Long and hot.

"Divine?" She opened the door to his room. "Time to wake up, honey. I'll start your tub."

"I'm sick, Mom. I can't go to school."

Her eyes closed tightly. No, this just couldn't be happening. Not this morning. Not to James. Not again.

Taking a determined breath, she marched into his room and over to his bed. He didn't look sick. But after reading the brochure Linda had given her, she realized that Divine had his own ways of dealing with grief and confusion. Psychosomatic illness was just one of the manifestations.

He'd caught her in tears last night. No doubt that had created new monsters, new fears, in his mind. She had to put them to rest, whatever they were.

She sank onto the side of the bed and smoothed the hair out of his eyes. "Where do you feel sick, honey?"

"I don't know. I just don't feel good. Do you have to go to work today?"

"Yes," she lied. "For a little while. If you want I'll ask Mrs. Hammed across the street to look in on you while I'm gone."

"I'm not a baby, Mom. I don't need a sitter. I just wish Dad was here."

"I know. But since he isn't, we'll make the best of it. Do you just want to stay in bed?"

"I think I'll get up."

"You can watch TV in the living room or play video games when I go."

"Okay. How long are you going to be gone?"

"Two hours," she improvised.

He climbed out of bed and followed her into her bedroom. "Why were you crying last night?"

"I was just talking to your dad about the war."

"He loves you, Mom."

"I know. I love him, too."

"But I mean he really loves you."

She couldn't endure another minute of this. "Honey...I have to get ready."

He waited outside the bedroom door. "Mom?" He called.

She turned on the shower, preparing to step inside. But she couldn't ignore him completely. "What is it, honey?"

"I know you love James, but do you really love him?"

. . .Oh Divine, my darling boy. You've asked the question I've been skirting all night. This morning I believe I know the answer. . .

"Let me finish my shower and then we'll talk."

"Okay," he said in a grumpy tone. She heard him stomp off down the hall.

She purposely took a long time to wash and blow dry her hair, hoping he'd be engrossed in something once she was dressed and ready to drive to James'.

No such luck. He was waiting for her when she went to the kitchen to find some painkiller for her headache.
"You know I'm running late? I've got things to do at the office before I teach class." She bent to give him a kiss on the cheek. "We'll talk when I get home. I'll call you in a little while and see how you're doing. And don't forget...you can always phone Mrs. Hammed."

"Okay. But hurry!"

"I will."

James would be shocked to see her on his doorstep at eight, but there was no help for it. She waved to Divine as she backed the car down the drive. Two hours. That was all she had to give James. But she might not need that long when he heard what she had to tell him.


SOMEONE WAS TRYING to get him on the phone. Whoever it was had rung three separate times in succession. James rolled over and glanced at his clock through bloodshot eyes. Five to eight. He rolled back onto his stomach.

There was only one person he wanted to talk to, and she wouldn't be here until nine.

The ringing started again. Damn the phone.

He put the pillow over his head, but nothing deadened the sound. The person on the other end wasn't about to give up.

Muttering a curse, he reached blindly for his phone. "Yes?"

"Hello? Is this James?"

James tried sitting a little straighter. "Sonia?"

"It didn't sound like you. I'm downstairs. Can I come up?"

"What do you think? Rosie, I'm sorry. I wasn't expecting you for another hour. I'm a mess."

"I'm afraid there was an unavoidable change in plans. Divine didn't want to go to school this morning. I've left him at home alone."

He shook his head to clear it. "Come up."

He levered himself from the bed with difficulty. Last night he'd had a few too many at the club. This morning he was paying the price.

Throwing on his robe, he hurried through to the front door. When he'd unfastened the bolt and opened it a crack, he took off for the bathroom. A quick shower and shave would help restore him. By the time he'd dressed in a clean T-shirt and jeans, he felt he could face Sonia without totally revolting her.

Normally James didn't drink much. But he'd wanted everything about yesterday and last night to be obliterated from his consciousness. Unfortunately the memories were back this morning, and his heart felt so heavy he knew he couldn't go on like this any longer.

Sonia wasn't a drinker, either, but judging by her haggard appearance, she looked as if she needed something a lot stronger than coffee to sustain her.

With painful clarity it came to him then that they weren't the same two people who'd danced the night away on the cruise.

Gone were the carefree lovers. Gone were the whispers in the night about a honeymoon. Gone was all talk of the baby they were going to make together. All gone.

When she didn't rush into his arms, he called her name.

One tear, then another, coursed down her pale cheeks. Her shoulders started to shake. "James?"

With that one word, a groan escaped his throat. He shook his head, sensing a burst of adrenaline that was making him feel like a crazy man.

He took several deep breaths, attempting to hold on to his sanity. "Sonia..." He began.


She was facing him as bravely as she would a firing squad. His adorable Sonia, noble to the bitter end.

"Can you look me in the eye and tell me you want to live the rest of your life with me?"

The energy radiating between them could have lit up a small city.

"You know how much I adore you, James. You know it," she whispered fiercely.

"That's not the answer." He folded his arms to keep from touching her. "I'll ask it again a different way...

"Knowing that your husband's alive, that you'll be seeing him coming and going in Divine's life, that you'll be talking to him from time to time, consulting him on occasion, being at functions where he'll be, standing with him in Divine's wedding-reception line one day, seeing him at the hospital when Divine's wife has a baby, or two or three. . .knowing all that. . .
"Do you, Sonia Brown, take me, James Okoye to be your lawfully wedded husband, do you promise to cling only to me, to want only me, to dream only me, to have children with me, to forsake all others...to put Kenneth Brown completely away...until death do us part?"

. . .I know what your answer is, Sonia. But I have to hear you say it. . .

"Take your time. This day had to come. This question had to be asked. I'm asking it now."

"I know," she whispered. "That's why I'm here."

The quiet grew more ominous. His mouth had gone dry. "I'll ask it a third way. Will it tear you apart when Kenneth marries another woman and starts a new life."

She buried her face in her hands.

"Will it tear you apart to think of him on a honeymoon with another woman? Making love to her as only you can imagine? Giving her a baby like the one he gave you?"

. . .A knock-down, drag-out, bottom-line session. No holds barred. . .

"Will it tear you apart that he comes home to her every night, instead of to you? Will it tear you apart that he's living out the future with someone else when it should have been your future?"

After an eternity she lifted a ravaged face. "It's already tearing me apart that I've hurt you so deeply."

"Say it, Sonia," James demanded. "Get it over with."

He heard the sob. Then, "I"m in love with Kenneth."

James reeled. "Thank you."

Unable to hold back any longer, he reached for her and caught her in his arms, crushing her to him.
"Sonia, Sonia...I'm dying now, but if I'd heard those words after we were married...I don't even want to think about it."

"If Kenneth hadn't come back..."

"I know. We would have had a fantastic life together."

She raised her head and grasped his face between her palms. "We would have. You're the most wonderful man, James. I'll always love you."

"And I'll always love you, my darling Sonia. But Kenneth's deep in your heart, so deep and tight, there's no room for anyone else. That's the kind of love I want, Sonia. So deep and tight it's forever."

. . .I'm telling you these lies because you want to hear them. . .

"I pray to God you find it."

. . .I won't. I've had my quota of lost loves. . .

"It's time to take back my ring," he said.

A new pain shattered him when she thrust a hand in her purse and handed the ring to him. She'd come over early to give it to him...

"I'd let you keep it, but Kenneth's as possessive a man as I am. You don't want a major fight on your hands before you've settled down to loving each other again."

That won a smile from Sonia, whose drenched eyes lit up at the very thought of her husband.
. . .Kenneth's seven-year nightmare is over. Mine's just beginning. . .

"What will you do, James?"

"Emeka is going to be put in charge of the company here. I'm moving back to Lagos."

. . .Another lie, but it'll make you happier to think of me there. . .

She squeezed him hard. "I'm so thankful you have family. I know they'll help you."

. . .No one will be helping me. I'm going to finish what I set out to do when I came to Abaji and got sidetracked by you, Sonia. After that, it doesn't matter. . $

"I'm going to miss you," she said with an ache in her voice.

"Maybe until Kenneth gets back from Dubai."

The tears were starting again. "If there'd been any way to know that he was still alive... You've spent two years of your life on me...it isn't fair, James..."

"Shh. I don't regret one single second of what we had together. I'll treasure it all my life." He kissed her forehead. "Now, go home to Divine. His happiness is going to make all of this worth it."

With their arms around each other he propelled her to the door. She looked up at him, searching his eyes. "James, how can I leave you like this?"

He put a finger to her lips. "Make it easy for me and go."

The second she was out the door, he dashed to the kitchen and phoned his brother. His nephew answered. Luckily Bernard hadn't gone to work yet.

"Go get your dad out of the shower for me, Richie."

"Okay, Uncle James. Just a second."

Come on...

"Hey, James."

"I confronted her, Ben. No holds barred. Now I'm a free man."

"James. . .I'm flying to Abuja. I'll be there as soon as I can."

"I may not be here."

"Just stay put till I get there."

"I thought I could handle it."

"You'll handle it."

"You want to make a bet?"

"James? We've both been through a lot together. We'll get through this, too. For the love of God, hang tight till I get there."

1 Like

Re: Divided Emotions by avicky(f): 10:33pm On Dec 21, 2012
Wow! It seems team kenneth is winning. Team James 7 yrs na beans?
Omolola, weldone. Thanks for d update.

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