nifemi16: hi cammy doll, you are God sent. I have been crying and moody all day. feeling heart broken, lonely and rejected. Just cause I am single and lonely, was introduced to a guy, I call him more than he calls, always sending him text messages, but he is always so reluctant to respond. Twice he has stood me up on a date. Today I got really frustrated and I sent him a message on how I have cheapened myself before him, how I have chased him, yet he has made my efforts worthless. I told him how he has pushed me away. I promised never to call him again. instantly I deleted his number.
He hasn't replied me, but I am feeling really hurt cause truly, I have come to love him. Now I am hoping that he would realise that I truly love him, and he would give me a chance. nifemidoll.

kitty katty:He won't realize that u truely love him. Even if he does, he doesn't have a space for you in his life now. I want our ladies to be less sentimental and more logical in dealing with men

Someone that rarely calls you and Stands up on dates doesn't regard u. He may have given yopu a chance earlier, hoping that it will work but along d line, h realizes that its not what he wants. Free the guy and look for another person that will value you. As much as I advocate that ladies can make the first move, I also blv that they shd be smart and strong about it. Don't get emotionally involved too early and if someone rejects you, move on fast.

You have to treat yourself like you are special before someone will do that for you.

Hi Nifemidoll,hope you re better now?
Sorry i didn't reply on time.I lost track of your post,but someone mentioned you today,so that helped.
i don't really have much to say apart from what kitty katty advised you.

Please be strong doll.You will be fine.

madridsta007: Well, well, well... Asking a Nigerian guy out... Hmmmm...

I suggest ladies shouldn't try it, at least not explicitly. If the guy says yes, he would most likely use you and dump you. Guys, we love to chase, hunt and find our own woman- not be chased and hunted. In that way we would more likely value her and keep her.
Ladies should look out for what he wants and then subtly display it. Those general things a guy loves- cleanliness, respect, care, focus, a desire for God... etc, flaunt those qualities and the brother would hunt you down like the CIA.

As for Nigerian men, never go asking them out outright, it would come to sting you much later if he says yes. He would see you as cheap in his eyes. Perhaps for Western men, that's fine, but for Nigerian men, its a NO.

Bro, speak yourself jare. Not all Nigerian guys are like that.

My first girlfriend asked me out, she was such an intelligent girl with confidence in her. And i never took her for granted, I even loved her more for the fact that she had the courage to ask me out.

dahonestboss:

Bro, speak yourself jare. Not all Nigerian guys are like that.

My first girlfriend asked me out, she was such an intelligent girl with confidence in her. And i never took her for granted, I even loved her more for the fact that she had the courage to ask me out.

Take it easy, there are always exception to the rules sir.

Winneygirl: @DailyNews,

U are who U are!
If U quit being Urself now, then it means that U're not proud of who U are.

It also invalidates everything U've posted on this thread.

I am who I am. I'm not perfect, but I'm proud of who I am.

I dont know abt U.

P.S: If U hang on, I will consider studying d different members of d preying cat family with U. I'll even watch Ur favourite DailyNews station.
We'll discuss business and politics.
I'll also watch Ur favourite 'tough' football matches & send U video clips of my goal celebration.
And I will not mention movies, music, fashion,.etc.

Deal??

First I want to apologize for abandoning the thread out of anger...after reading through the comments following my pouring out of my anger based on what a friend told me, and coupled with my experiences here in the past, I felt bad, and felt like leaving forever, but I then remembered the story of Moses, lol, so I felt I had to say something to those that feel I am reasonable at least.

Winney, your deal is so touchy I must confess

Anyway, most of you may be new on nairaland, or the romance section, so I must let the new members know that DailyNews has been here for long now, and that handle has been through lots of drama, etc, both the ones I caused ignorantly and the ones people inspired to ridicule the handle. I have been attacked, criticized, called all sorts of demeaning names even when I had nothing against anyone, and I must agree that I made some mistakes just like every human, and I learnt from them, and tried all I could to amend and become a better person here on nairaland.

Let me spare the long story, Winneygirl, I appreciate your concern, I feel cool, I feel cool with all of you guys- carmelion, Winneygirl, edelweiss, Rooneyboy, ferhyntorlah, madridsta007, Cutejay, Aunty nurse, etc, etc...but I really think its time for me to go silent on this forum; there is time for everything, and I think I have tried my best, and have contributed my best too, and I know any day, any time, I will be remembered for either good or bad here.

I have learnt certain lessons from participating actively on this forum, I appreciate it a lot...and even if I am gonna be posting, I don't think I am gonna be a regular anymore, not on romance section, I take my bow.

Thank you once again, Winneygirl, pls I dont want them to tag you a bad name, so therefore, let everyone understand that she is only joking, and trying to gear me up again, and I appreciate that a lot...it means lots to me...

Wishing all the single guys and ladies here a successful love life when you find one soon. Take care guys, and pls carmy, do keep up with your good work here and don't let anyone bring you down. Bye

madridsta007:

Take it easy, there are always exception to the rules sir.

But u didn't explain it like that..

nbright: I know... But..... By the way, long time. Haven't seen ur post on fb 4 a while now. Hope u are doing great?...

Yeah, long time. Am doing just fine. Wil talk to u underground...

Nigerian ladies... I saw this on bbc.. No b only 4 Naija men scarce

"I'm pretty old - I'm almost 30 - but I'm still
single," explains Ding Na, a woman hailing
from China's northeast.
"I'm under lots of pressure. My sisters and
my relatives all ask me why I'm not married.
When they call me, I'm scared to pick up the
phone."
Twenty-somethings in China - young
women especially - face a strict societal
deadline to find a husband before they turn
30.
According to Zhou Xiaopeng, a consultant
with Baihe.com, one of China's biggest
dating agencies, the pressure for singles to
settle down crescendos around Chinese
New Year.
"Picture a scene where people sit around a
table," Ms Zhou says.
"Chinese people love to get together for
dinner. On New Year's Eve, everybody is
sitting in pairs, your brother with your
sister-in-law, your sister with your brother-
in-law, and so on. If you're the only one left
behind, you can imagine the pressure and
frustration."
Kiss for $8
Luckily for some, China's most popular
online marketplace, Taobao, offers a band-
aid solution: the rental of fake boyfriends.
For as little as $50 (£32) a day, dozens of
classified adverts promise to provide a male
companion for the holidays, pretending to
be a single woman's plus-one.
Some postings list a full menu of possibilities
- charging $5 an hour to accompany a girl to
dinner and $8 for a kiss on the cheek. If the
fake boyfriend stays overnight with his
client's family for Chinese New Year, he
charges $80 a night to sleep in his own bed,
and $95 to sleep on the couch.
Sex is not even an option on the list.

here's the link m.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-21192131

Hahaha! Funny, seems a nice business for the men though.

And I do not think men are scarce in Nigeria....

madridsta007:
And I do not think men are scarce in Nigeria....

Yeah u are right... Men aren't scarce, but GOOD husband materials are... According to our ladies

nbright: Nigerian ladies... I saw this on bbc.. No b only 4 Naija men scarce here's the link m.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-china-21192131

Thanks for posting.Funny though.But I think the situation is also related to the fact that their population is so much.

Besides,the level of the pressure on single ladies there,I mean based on what you posted, is higher than ours.I had a good laugh though.(I mean,a sad face won't solve the problem)

*God will help us all*

DailyNews:

First I want to apologize for abandoning the thread out of anger...after reading through the comments following my pouring out of my anger based on what a friend told me, and coupled with my experiences here in the past, I felt bad, and felt like leaving forever, but I then remembered the story of Moses, lol, so I felt I had to say something to those that feel I am reasonable at least.

Winney, your deal is so touchy I must confess

Anyway, most of you may be new on nairaland, or the romance section, so I must let the new members know that DailyNews has been here for long now, and that handle has been through lots of drama, etc, both the ones I caused ignorantly and the ones people inspired to ridicule the handle. I have been attacked, criticized, called all sorts of demeaning names even when I had nothing against anyone, and I must agree that I made some mistakes just like every human, and I learnt from them, and tried all I could to amend and become a better person here on nairaland.

Let me spare the long story, Winneygirl, I appreciate your concern, I feel cool, I feel cool with all of you guys- carmelion, Winneygirl, edelweiss, Rooneyboy, ferhyntorlah, madridsta007, Cutejay, Aunty nurse, etc, etc...but I really think its time for me to go silent on this forum; there is time for everything, and I think I have tried my best, and have contributed my best too, and I know any day, any time, I will be remembered for either good or bad here.

I have learnt certain lessons from participating actively on this forum, I appreciate it a lot...and even if I am gonna be posting, I don't think I am gonna be a regular anymore, not on romance section, I take my bow.

Thank you once again, Winneygirl, pls I dont want them to tag you a bad name, so therefore, let everyone understand that she is only joking, and trying to gear me up again, and I appreciate that a lot...it means lots to me...

Wishing all the single guys and ladies here a successful love life when you find one soon. Take care guys, and pls carmy, do keep up with your good work here and don't let anyone bring you down. Bye

Thanks dailynews.I wish things didn't go this way.

The little time you spent here With us was effective,but I can not force you to go against your will.Bye

See you on other threads.

am sure we're gonna see a couple come out from this thread...

nbright: Yeah u are right... Men aren't scarce, but GOOD husband materials are... According to our ladies

Hahaha! Good husband materials are not scarce, in my opinion. Be the right wife material, you will find those good gentlemen running after you. But once you live a crazy, fun-mad, barbie doll life, and you now realise its time to settle down- you can't mock God, you will only attract the kind of guys that your previous lifestyle had. That's where ladies get it wrong. Don't think that when you change automatically, you will attract the 'husband materials' automatically- na lie, it doesn't work that way, unless God releases you a certain heavy grace.

@DailyNews,

Nice of U 2 come back to officially Take a Bow.

Wherever U are, U are who U are. Don't let anyone take it away from U.

Take care...

dahonestboss:

Bro, speak yourself jare. Not all Nigerian guys are like that.

My first girlfriend asked me out, she was such an intelligent girl with confidence in her. And i never took her for granted, I even loved her more for the fact that she had the courage to ask me out.

yeah! same here.

madridsta007:
Hahaha! Good husband materials are not scarce, in my opinion.

That's ur own opinion, bt sm gals do say they are few good men around. I read a post here on Nairaland how a gal rejected suitors that proposed to her. Most give diff. excuses like "I'm taller than He is., "He doesn't own a car., He is poor,. He is not from my tribe. When u say but He truely loves you. There best retort is "NA LOVE I GO CHOP?".......

madridsta007: Be the right wife material, you will find those good gentlemen running after you.

Go and check the thread "Girls what do u want for Valentine"... Many girls are requesting for what only sugar daddy's could afford... I just stopped at the 1st page though... Sometimes I laugh at the way our girls reason things..

@camelion.. You are really a wise and totful girl with your post and replies
But explain to me, why girls keep running after bad boys without conscience and leaving behind the good guys with good/kind heart
The same girls will run back complaining this boy did this did that
Most good/kind hearted guys hardly break girls heart but gorgeous girls still find them unattractive

This is an extract from my page on Facebook. Do enjoy it as you read through.


Valentine
Valentine, the word that leads so many to commit all sorts of immoral sins. Have you ever researched about how that word came to be? Someone died because he was doing the right thing. He was killed because he freed persecuted Christians and he joined people, especially soldiers in holy matrimony. Today, it is celebrated with a lot of atrocities happening on that same day. 

What is your gain as a single lady, telling so many men that you love them? Do you find joy in giving your body which is the temple of God to a man you are not married to?

To me, VALENTINE means a whole lot of things, holy things and not immoral things. I myself was formerly blinded to this truth until I accepted Christ as my Lord and saviour. The essence of valentine is to celebrate unconditional love. How can you say you love someone when you do not even love yourself? You don't  love yourself by indulging in premarital sex, lust and all immoral acts. 
Women have developed a sense of attractions to sweet words from men. You already know that he is not what you want, why do you lead him on?

For me, VALENTINE is defined as :-

V for Vision.
Unconditional love is a vision. When you fall in love with someone, you enVision what you want to achieve with the person. You see into the good future of yourself and the person. Your mind and thoughts are focused on you becoming a better part of the person. St. Valentine had a vision to help soldiers to get married and save the persecuted Christians. He fell in love with helping people who are in love to end up together It's a Vision born out of love, a Vision that became a mission he believed in and died for.

What are you living for? If you die now, would you be happy that you lived a good life? What would be people's report about you? The life you live is a book that so many people are reading. What is your Vision in life? Is your February 14th, 2013 going to be the same like the year before? Is your Vision for that day is to go clubbing, partying or is it for you to indulge in immorality? Do you think that all these things that you do is adding to you positively? Think deeply about it. WHAT IS YOUR VISION?

A for Attitude

St. Valentine is a man with a positive attitude. He knows the repercussions of his actions but he kept doing what he was doing because he knew that it is the right thing to do. In life, money, wealth, resources and people cannot make you succeed in life, it is your Attitude that creates a way for you. Your kind of Attitude will determine where you end up in life. I am not happy that St. Valentine was martyred for the right reasons but I am happy that he died for the right cause with a positive attitude. Do you have a negative attitude? Are you the haughty, proud and self centered kind of person? Do you think or feel less about other people? He died for the right reasons, are you living for the right reasons.

There is a judge that you can never silence in you. Your conscience. What is it that you have as an attitude that your conscience is condemning? Think about it and change. If St. Valentine is asked to judge you with your current attitude, how would he rate you?

L for Love

To many, Love means sex, kissing romance and all sorts but to St Valentine, it meant surrendering his life for others to be happy. Love is totally unconditional. It is an affection that is not expectant of a reward. Are you with him because you love him? Do you think of how to help him always and not how to bring him down? Is your Love a reward oriented kind of love? If St. Valentine loved himself more than his mission, there will never be a day to his name today. Love is about coming together with a Vision fueled by the right Attitude and encapsulated in Love. He joined people together in holy matrimony. He sacrificed his own life so that others will live and be happy.

Do you really love people around you? Do you even love that man you profess love too? Can you make that sacrifice St. Valentine made? Can you look at yourself in the mirror and accept that you really love others? Think about it.

The other letters can be found @ www.facebook.com/lovingmebefore

Hi dolls,hope you re ok?
TGIF!!!,yeah whether you re working,schooling or not,you should TGIF.
Friday means the weekend is getting to the end,therefore its time to rest and relax.

As single ladies,I want you to know that most single guys do not even remember that they re single untill weekends.You know why?

It's because they re busy chasing money(they need it to make things happen,you know),attending series of meetings both locally and internationally,inter state,and intra-state.E.t.C

In the mist of all these,it might interest you to know that some of them dont have time for toasting babes during the week.

You know they have a flight/bus/appointments/presentations/seminars/trainings/lectures e.t.c to catch up with.

But once,its friday,its all about weddings/parties/ceremonies/relaxation.So nobody is in a hurry,therefore everyone is in a relaxed mood.

_{So ladies,this is the time to attract them}. But remember,the eyes eats first before the rest of the body so it all boils down to our dressing.

For weekends,its all about,tops,jeans,shorts,skirts,outing gowns,traditional wears,and whatever you feel comfortable in but please no corporate wears and of course,they should all be decent.

My next post would come with pictures to serve as a source of inspiration on how to dress.

Less I forget,your dressing is incomplete without a smile.

Keep eye contacts too.its a source of encouragement for the guys.


~Have a beautiful day~

Wow-Nice, Nice, Nice!

Weldone ladies, most especially Carmelion-your thread did serve it's purpose, am glad.

cowgurl: Wow-Nice, Nice, Nice!

Weldone ladies, most especially Carmelion-your thread did serve it's purpose, am glad.

Thanks hun

carmelion: As single ladies,I want you to know that most single guys do not even remember that they re single untill weekends.You know why?

It's because they re busy chasing money(they need it to make things happen,you know),attending series of meetings both locally and internationally,inter state,and intra-state.E.t.C

In the mist of all these,it might interest you to know that some of them dont have time for toasting babes during the week.

You are a master planner (strategist)... What u wrote is so on point...

carmelion: You know they have a flight/bus/appointments/presentations/seminars/trainings/lectures e.t.c to catch up with.

Some men actually meet their wives while embarking on such trips...

carmelion: But once,its friday,its all about weddings/parties/ceremonies/relaxation.So nobody is in a hurry,therefore everyone is in a relaxed mood.

You forgot that saturdays and sundays there are FOOTBALL matches been played...

Any doll in the house? For an agnostic/atheist brother.

Rooneyboy: The truth is most Naija ladies are naturally stingy, they have a very myopic way of reasoning when it comes to relationship.

Any guy that dates a Naija lady and expects a gift worth more than 3K must be an E-diot .

To them its always one sided and they must be the ones receiving.

I kinda agree with this dude... I have a friend( A bros). He works at Onne port in Port Harcourt... He always complain about this same issue to my mum... She always expect from him but never gives him anything... Xmas day he bought stuffs for she and her her family member, New Year's day the same thing happened... I know this val. it's going to be the same... Some times when I hear stories from his friends (they are all working) I fear to think of how our turn will be... Do girls of nowadays marry for love or the money?.

madridsta007: Well, well, well... Asking a Nigerian guy out... Hmmmm...

I suggest ladies shouldn't try it, at least not explicitly. If the guy says yes, he would most likely use you and dump you. Guys, we love to chase, hunt and find our own woman- not be chased and hunted. In that way we would more likely value her and keep her.
Ladies should look out for what he wants and then subtly display it. Those general things a guy loves- cleanliness, respect, care, focus, a desire for God... etc, flaunt those qualities and the brother would hunt you down like the CIA.

As for Nigerian men, never go asking them out outright, it would come to sting you much later if he says yes. He would see you as cheap in his eyes. Perhaps for Western men, that's fine, but for Nigerian men, its a NO.

Thats not true friend. I am the type dat don't even like toasting naija babes sef cuz I hate process so much .I wuld luv it if I toast now ,u shuld agree immediately .no come today,come tomorrow.u have accepted a guys offer doesn't mean u shuld sleep with him outrightly.she culd start from frienship,no kissig ,just getting to him then it matures into something serious.along the line if u think its not gonna work out ,u can pull out and still be friends

Since I started dating girls I don't think I have won the hart of the girls I walked up to. Cuz I hate chasing people around ,it doesn't give me joy.it make me look jobless and stupid .no matter how much I admire a girl ,if she fails to respond well, I will delete the admiration from my hart .

@carmydolly doll nice work .pls educate them very well .seriously we have so many funny girls in the haus .I know what you are doing and I luv it .post ur beautiful face let's admire it. Wuld luv to see the pretty face dishing out this luvly write up




U can call me waterdoll.not gay, just trying to be funny. Thanks

Good thread

But if all you ladies here can tell yourself the truth, it would never get better

Naija/Black girls generally sees an ordinary hard working guy as being sissy/boring/not man enough etc. They lack common sense and are short sighted. They judge you base on today alone, and the judgement generally comes from the way you dress, talk etc. they can tell if you are rich or not (materialistic bunch of girls).

even in the western world, some guys always prefer to settle with white ladies or come back to look for a decent woman either by recommendation from families or a long time girlfriend. Many of my friends got married through that way.

If you need an evidence of how materialistic Naija girls are, just stop them when you are in your car, and see the way they will jump in as if they have known you from adam. And if you stop that same girl when you are on foot, then the attitude change.

Like someone already said, the only thing most (yes, most) of them will offer you is s3x and children thats all.

many of my friends in Nigeria are clocking 35, but havent found a decent wife due to their materialistic behaviour.

even the one's I met in New york, London, Paris are nothing to write home about

Imagine when you are on a date and a girl is asking you question like ''are you a student?´´ what job do you do?'' do you have a car?'' ''do you live alone?'' etc

THE FACT IS, THERE ARE GOOD MARRIAGABLE MEN EVERYWHERE, THEY WILL COME TO YOU IF YOU ARE DECENT AND NOT MATERIALISTIC AS THE REST.

Show me a woman of 26 years old, and I will show you at least 5 different guys that proposed to them

And to the guys here, pls tell them the fact, and stop making them feel like is not their fault they are still single.

Of course there are decent girls, but majority of them are like these, and I am sure they are on this page. (no need to take it personal if you aint one)

Just my thought

Good job!

lalaosky: lalaosky doll repeorting for duty...

I'm a single lady...i feel so lonely...OP advice me please

U've got a very funny signature

Even if traditional wears,always look sexy.

Just know what colour suits your skin and be creative