Its ok to be absolutely open, but wisdom is profitable to direct, so know your spause and consider the outcomes before devolging informations. Secretes kept about you and your spouse often turn around to hurt you both....

Do unto others as you would have them do unto you, is the Golden Rule. If you want your spouse to be open to you, then you should learn to be open to him/her too. Being open in a marriage or any given relationship will help in no small way in shielding intruders and keeping them at bar from the affairs of such marriage or relationship.
Though people oftentimes tend to abuse the opportunity, but it is really what given a try.

It is often said that "it is only a lady you hate that you tell the truth always". Don't get me wrong, I believe you should be honest with ur lady/man but some untold things and some questions are better left unanswered eg: who do u tink of wen u wnakk ; the money u gave to the relative u know ur partner hates; "who" or "what' you were looking at before you ran into an electric pole , Did you use to "enjoy it" with ur ex? etc...

it is not everything that u tell people(male or female)

Hey!

Wait a minute!

To be open in marriage does'nt mean you should lay all your family secret on the table,.being open means telling your partner about your plans and asperation and not about your office gossips,pay rise,past family wragglings,past relationship and stuffs like that....keep the joker card close to your chest....marriage is an adventure,you dont know where it will lead you to....be a bit reserve, because there are some things you may say that can lead to the collapse of the marriage... Say things that are necessary and jettison unecessary comments...too much talks kills relationship....

BE OPEN TILL DEATH DO YOU PART.JUST BE OPEN IN ALL ISSUES

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i wouldn't comment until the marital status of u all is known!

In as much as it's good to be open, some information should be left the way they are for peace to reign, no individual or family that has not got some secrets they are not very proud to share, and this may result to scaring your partner away. Always say the truth when asked but don't go around talking every negative secrets about yourself or your family. ( Read guidance and counselling books to see this is scientifically established)

I think you should be very open but if my parents say something, I might not tell him. I don't mind releasing the password to everything to him but some things are better left unsaid if it isn't gonna be In the best interest of everyone.

Every_LadY: When it comes being open to ur spouse,pls be very and totally open about urself.Wisdom demands that u protect ur loved ones from some information that will not make any positive contribution to their lives.So why tell him/her what mummy said since am not going to implement it?sounds childish to me.

Correct! Moreover, not every partner is matured enough to handle every bit of information. Factor in your partner's maturity and temperament.

uche13:
I am going to start by saying that I am a christian who believes in the principle of "two becoming one" in marriage. But I have been asking myself of late on the necessity to be very open in a relationship and marriage. So I am asking for matured inputs and advice please.

I was raised up in a home where my parents are very open to each other. I mean 100 percent open. Same applies to my partner who reminds me so much of my dad in this regard . While it could take a lot of whining to get me to talk, he is very open. He hides nothing and I have the passwords to his email, access to his phone et al. His principle is that anything anyone does not want my wife to know, do not bother telling me because I believe in oneness (we are still engaged though).

My issue is this, there are somethings that I believe should not be revealed or in its entirety for the sake of preserving relationships. For example, before my parents gave their consent to our union, they voiced some concerns which were normal. I could not go on and tell him everything because the truth is that I know it may affect his relationship with them in the future even though from my point of view and that of my siblings, it is not easy giving out your last child without reservations. But now they have wholeheartedly accepted him.

I remember when my brother was getting married, his wife too who believes in "I must tell my husband everything" was always telling him all what her parents were saying. Even during the wedding preparations which we know always causes a percentage of friction between the two families, she told him everything eg "mummy said I should not always discuss everything with you, I should have a secret account, how can she say a thing like that" etc. Everyone was praising her in my family that the girl knows how to marry, she adores my brother and tells him everything but at the long run, I have noticed the way my brother has changed towards his inlaws unlike how it was initially. This is natural with or without his planning it. But her relationship with her parents is still intact.

The truth is that blood is thick and no matter what my mum says or does to me that is seemingly so hurting, by the next day or two, I would have forgotten but this does not apply to people who do not have a blood relationship.

This is just an example though, so I am asking, are there times when one is supposed to shut up and filter information from ones spouse or should it be a case of 100 percent openness and honesty?

Well said.