Lilimax: This question is directed to guys alone

Lilimax: This question is directed to guys alone

nene1: Salams everyone,

I had a discussion with my mom and cousin about polygamy. I feel that EVERY man would practice polygamy if they could even including non muslims who criticize our system. So I just wanted to ask the muslim men here if they would marry more women if they were wealthy or if they would still stick to one wife. I think that in theory polygamy, is a good idea for women (not just men). If people did it right it would be of great benefit to women, but many men cannot be fair. Also women don't respect each other. They try to give each other hell. This is why I prefer to avoid polygamy. I am really afraid of my future husband cheating on me or marrying another wife. I really hope I find one who is fine with one wife and set of kids. I would be devastated if it happened to me. I don't think I have the patience or strength to endure it. Are there men out there that can actually control their desires and be faithful to one woman. My cousin's mother is a 3rd wife so she has no problem with polygamy and was almost ready to be a 2nd wife of an older rich guy. However he has been married to his one wife for many years. He's one of the few rich men with 1 wife. My cousin thinks it's selfish to want a man all to yourself. I disagree, if you are in love with your husband, why would you want to share him with another woman? Polygamy only needs to be practiced by a few men in order for every woman to find a husband. It doesn't have to be mine. Some women are ok with it and some are not. It is not fard in Islam so everyone doesn't have to do it. Well that's my feeling on polygamy. [b]Maybe I am wrong, but we do have a choice on what type of marriage we want[b].

obadiah777: if you have a third leg you can answer it too

Mr Aboki:


Yarinya!!

How much are you?! I need a Igbo girl in my Harem.

Lilimax: huh

Lilimax:
Your personal text have said it all: Aboki na bastard!

nene1: Salams everyone,

I had a discussion with my mom and cousin about polygamy. I feel that EVERY man would practice polygamy if they could even including non muslims who criticize our system. So I just wanted to ask the muslim men here if they would marry more women if they were wealthy or if they would still stick to one wife. I think that in theory polygamy, is a good idea for women (not just men). If people did it right it would be of great benefit to women, but many men cannot be fair. Also women don't respect each other. They try to give each other hell. This is why I prefer to avoid polygamy. I am really afraid of my future husband cheating on me or marrying another wife. I really hope I find one who is fine with one wife and set of kids. I would be devastated if it happened to me. I don't think I have the patience or strength to endure it. Are there men out there that can actually control their desires and be faithful to one woman. My cousin's mother is a 3rd wife so she has no problem with polygamy and was almost ready to be a 2nd wife of an older rich guy. However he has been married to his one wife for many years. He's one of the few rich men with 1 wife. My cousin thinks it's selfish to want a man all to yourself. I disagree, if you are in love with your husband, why would you want to share him with another woman? Polygamy only needs to be practiced by a few men in order for every woman to find a husband. It doesn't have to be mine. Some women are ok with it and some are not. It is not fard in Islam so everyone doesn't have to do it. Well that's my feeling on polygamy. Maybe I am wrong, but we do have a choice on what type of marriage we want.

Deen4me: This one na banger ooo

On a more serious note, Lets look at the facts

Polygamy : a system of marriage whereby one person has more than one spouse

Polygyny : where a man marries more than one woman (Allowed in Islam)

Polyandry : where a woman marries more than one man (Not Allowed in Islam)


1 Islam did not introduce polygyny

Moses 2 wives (Exodus 2:21 , Numbers 12:1)
Abraham at least three wives (Genesis 16:3 ,Genesis 25: 1-5)
David -12 Wives , 3 Concubines (1 Samuel 18:27 ,1 Chronicles 3 1-5)
Solomon 700 wives and 300 concubines (1 kings 11:3 ,Songs 6:8 2 Kings 10:1)

2 : The Qur'an is the only religious scripture in the world that says, 'marry only one'

"Then marry those that please you of women
two or three or four.
but if you fear you will not be just, then (marry only) one " Q 4:3

3. Polygyny protects the interests of women and children in society. It requires men to spend on their additional wives and their offspring.

The Prophet(PBUH) says,
“When a man has two wives and he is inclined to one of them, he will come on the Day of resurrection with a side hanging down (paralyzed) Abu Dawud

4.Only a minority (10-15 %) of Muslims practice polygyny because of additional financial and psychological burdens of handling more than one family.

Deen4me: Islams aims to solve societal problems by practical means

Not everybody likes polygamy, but my opinion is it should be encouraged.

.........And live with them in kindness. For if you dislike them - perhaps you dislike a thing and Allah makes therein much good. (Q 4:19)

When I see what a lot of ladies go through either willingly or unwillingly under the guise of trying to get married.

Dignity and honour is thrown under the trailer.

Pressure from home, society, Biological clocks , a lot of wrong decisions are made.

I can only pray that my sisters never have to go through such.

Why do people love putting religion here. where is Moses and Abraham now? where are you. Better be realistic and face your life.

And lets not forget the widows, chances of them getting remarried is slim and God bless you if you have kids in tow.

I believe a lot of the negativity stems from what society exposes one to, i.e Africa magic Yoruba etc

How our fathers practiced it without adhering the Islamic rules etc

@ OP

I don't think it is proper for a believer to connote negativity on what Allah has given approval for.

My advise to you is pray to Allah to give you what is best for you.

He may decide to test you with anything. Our prayer as believers is we pass those tests in flying colours.

We have a lot of sisters in their late 30's and 40's who are yet to get married, If reverse was the case would you still stand on your opinion

The point is explained by the Hadith of the Rasul (PBUH)

Anas relates that the Prophet (PBUH) said: “None of you truly believes until he loves for his brother what he loves for himself.

Bukhari & Muslim

Let me leave you with this article letting you know its not only local to Nigeria but a global phenomenon

The sooner we start addressing the problem the better for us

http://www.saudigazette.com.sa/index.cfm?method=home.regcon&contentid=20131026184706

Salam Alaikum

warrikid:

Great points man.
@Topic
BTW-can someone show me where in the bible it says of a man not marrying more than one wife.
(I'm not talking about a deacon or church leader pls).
Thanks.

Mr Aboki: YES!!!



ALLAH DEMANDS IT OF ALL MUSLIMS..



A man is allowed to marry up to four women for many reasons, benefiting both the man and the women.

•Firstly, it may help the women as in the case of the Prophet where he often married poor women or women whose husbands died in battle. This was to help and protect them.

•Secondly, as the prophet Abraham (as) married, they may bear the man a child when the first wife cannot. Instead of abandoning a women for her inability to conceive, he marries another and *treats them both with justice)

•And lastly, in the case of a man tempted to commit adultery with another women. Instead of this man committing a grave sin, adultury, Allah has given man an ease within his law and allowed man to marry another women. The aim of this is to prevent man and the women from committing a grave sin. Many people look at this law as a selfish addition to men but in fact it is meant as an ease on both men and women; it's not an excuse to 'have fun' with many wives but in fact it is meant to help ease men and women with their way of life.


ALLAHU AKBAR!!!
ALLAHU AKBAR
ALLAHU AKBAR