lols

StealthyMe: That one person whose face is as hardened as concrete who continually looks around suspiciously......

And u be like ' Shey i neva enter One Chance so?'

That passenger is me!

And I look continually around because I fear wether na me enter one chance

Here in lagos u gats be wise mehn! U gats be!!

rusher14:

Better than the guy that reads over your shoulder and holds your hand as you flip the page....Na you and am buy the paper?

Buahahaha. This one true die I swear. Its always annoying.

The preacher who will preach and pray for the passengers then when the bus is about to move he will tell you to bring money aka sow seed to support his 'ministry'. Then you begin to wonder is he preaching so he can genuinely do the work of God or is he there collecting money from passengers for his own personal use?

HAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH
AHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAH
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAH
AHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHH
AHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAH
AHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHA
HAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHA
HHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAH
AHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH
HAHAHAHA

..u forgot 2 add d traders, dose peeps dt sell painkiller..they tell u it's all in 1, relieves pain, an antimalaria, cures infertility, pile etc..

They tell u 'na only 5 remain, be d lucky buyer (perhaps plenty stll remain inside dt old tattered bag dey carry)


..and it's alwas only for 50naira..

The one who look out the window all through the ride.

i have been entering Danfo for like forever. i recently got my first car but find it hard to part with my ever familiar danfo experience.
A set i detest is d drug seller who waits for passengers to settle in only to stand up weilding a megaphone, intending to sell a drug dat cures all ailments... Gosh!!!

adebisiolumide5: Please how do i get to ejigbo from Opebi Allen in Ikeja using public buses. and how much would it cost please help me oo.. its urgent..

From opebi allen take a bus going to Ikeja new garage. At new garage take a vehicle going to Ikotun-egbe. From Ikotun Egbe board another one going to ejigbo. Should cost you about 300/350

The atomic bomb..
After eating beans,egg,groundnut,kuli-kuli.
Those girls wey dey form miss nigeria.
Them go dey for back dey release the atomic bomb at intervals.

Their fart smells like dead goat

tchidi: The first time I went to Lagos was last year... From the moment I boarded the bus, the conductor kept shouting at fellow conductors and agberos 'Iya eh'.. 'Iya eh'.
I had to ask if it was a destination too?!! And why he only shouted it to fellow conductors. My friend I was with laughed me to scorn!!

Not just 'iya eh': 'iyala ya eh', 'ko ni da fun iyala ya eh', 'Sango ma pe iyala ya eh', 'iyala ya eh ti ya werey' etc

purplesummer: Then the lady with the low waist jeans flashing her butt at any body who is plagued with
the misfortune of sitting behind her

That's the worst part.

The pretender who reminds everyone that he does'nt belong in a danfo. He is talking on his phone like 'Yes yes I am in a publc transport. Yes fix my car fast. I am coming to pick it now'

The medicine seller who claims his medicine cure all ailments like Typhoid,syphilis,Malaria,Convulsion,Snake bite,tetanus,headache & H.I.V
Only one medicine ??

adebisiolumide5:

Which Area do I take da bus going to OSHODI?? IS AT TOYIN STRT. OR FRONT OF TFC??

That's a long journey abeg. Go to Ikeja new garage, enter Ikotun, at Ikotun the journey to ejigbo is like twenty minutes. About 300/350

11. Drug sellers...Even before the driver move, they will just stand up where they were sitting in front of the bus and knowing fully well that those people have a mouth watering talk, at times they convince you to buy their drugs you dont plan for...Just disgusting.

Ishilove:
Not just 'iya eh': 'iyala ya eh', 'ko ni da fun iyala ya eh', 'Sango ma pe iyala ya eh', 'iyala ya eh ti ya werey' etc

adebisiolumide5: Please how do i get to ejigbo from Opebi Allen in Ikeja using public buses. and how much would it cost please help me oo.. its urgent..

Take a bus from Ikeja to Ikotun, then from Ikotun, take a bus to Ejigbo..
Should cost u a total of N400 max

Eyop:

dimples2:

That passenger is me!

And I look continually around because I fear wether na me enter one chance

Here in lagos u gats be wise mehn! U gats be!!

LoL!
I remember once entering a bus and a guy wearing a black overall and dark shades was just looking about like a thief...

The thing wey just dey my mind na make my bus stop quick reach maa drop

...that guy that pays with 1000 for a fare of 50box (Gobe)

and u probably ended up in convo convo!!

rusher14:
Better than the guy that reads over your shoulder and holds your hand as you flip the page....Na you and am buy the paper?

Hilarious

Craziest story from a danfo coming up now!

On a sunday, decided to go pick up my hard-drive from my brother (he's on the island, I was then in S/lere). I got to Shitta and instead of taking a cab, decided to do alaroro and enter bus to the island.
At CMS, I boarded a bus going to Lekki. The woman beside me was smacking her lips on a sachet of pure water and was dressed like a "busstop geh" (not ashi, but like someone who hangs out with area boys). As soon as the bus was full and the conductor started taking fares, she calmly and loudly began to ask each person to pay her fare (with no shame and no begging). She argued with the conductor until out of "let this noise end", another customer paid. Me, I jejely brought out my phone to keep busy (and not make eye contact).

She made a point of helping me announce my b/stop (I didn't ask her o!). I dropped off at the stop and she got off too. Me, I walked quickly into the estate. Like 20 mins later, I was home and decided to get some chicken from the fridge. Our flats have windows facing out the kitchen in front (Lord knows why 1004 is designed with no privacy in mind). Suddenly someone started ringing and banging our neighbour's door, it was made. I tried to look out and that was when THAT SAME LADY FROM THE BUS spotted me! Immediately she came to our door and started doing the same. I told my bro (he got angry) and he answered the door. Same brazen, cocky manner from this lady: she said she knew me, we were friends, she had business with me, they should tell me to come outside to meet her! She refused to leave till we called security and even then she sat by the crescent gate, waiting for me to come out. My brother ended up driving me home.

Trust my mama to have sharp Nigerian mama tongue: "you'll be carrying natural hair up and down, wearing ankara with oily face, she thought you were poor and at her level!"

Omo see topic ye

Not forgetting adult Lappers and God help you if you sit in front of them. Also women with four kids who will cramp themselves and pay for one seat or ask you ' mummy, please let my pikin stand in front of you' in order to avoid paying. Lastly when one of the adult Lappers get down at his bus stop, the other one remains on seat while the driver would think there should be a vacant seat and tells the conductor, 'pero soko' and the conductor replies' won lap ni jare' and the driver will yell ' a won olobe'. Gosh! We Lagosians are not boring at all and I will never trade Lagos for even US or Uk. Naija for life!

Chai!! Nairalanders oooo!!! See me laughing inside bus like a mad woman. I can relate with a lot of these experiences

I nid to meet them 1 day

Ishilove:
That's a long journey abeg. Go to Ikeja new garage, enter Ikotun, at Ikotun the journey to ejigbo is like twenty minutes. About 300/350

Thanks Mehn!!

StealthyMe:

LoL!
I remember once entering a bus and a guy wearing a black overall and dark shades was just looking about like a thief...

The thing wey just dey my mind na make my bus stop quick reach maa drop

I no dey smile inside bus o!

After I foolishly smiled along with 1 guy thinking he was admiring me turned out the guy was picking my pocket and eventually stole my phone

Or I target sitting near the door and you would see a nice young man or elderly man will say: baby, I don't think this seat is suitable for women, y not come inside and let me replace you

My ear go just stand And with okpolo eye I will say: no, thanks. I'm fine

The man was just being nice o! But u know..

ajebuter: Not forgetting adult Lappers and God help you if you sit in front of them. Also women with four kids who will cramp themselves and pay for one seat or ask you ' mummy, please let my pikin stand in front of you' in order to avoid paying. Lastly when one of the adult Lappers get down at his bus stop, the other one remains on seat while the driver would think there should be a vacant seat and tells the conductor, 'pero soko' and the conductor replies' won lap ni jare' and the driver will yell ' a won olobe'. Gosh! We Lagosians are not boring at all and I will never trade Lagos for even US or Uk. Naija for life!

Lmao!