The Abuser --- This passenger and d driver/conductor will rain different curses and abuses on each other till the passenger alights frm d bus... It cud be fun listening to their conversation after a stressful day @ work... Other passengers like me will laugh @ each heavy word... #LOL

There was actually a day dat a woman stood by d doorway and d conductor abused d woman in his native dialect... Na so d woman looked back angrily and replied the conductor in dat same dialect... The conductor was shocked that day... We cudn't control our laughter dat day...

There was also a day dat a hot argument ensued btw d driver and a passenger... Suddenly, the driver jux parked @ a bus stop and he came down frm d bus. That was how dis cool handsome dude alighted frm d bus and removed his suit jacket, removed his tie and dropped his laptop with his friend. Come and see Mortal Combat day ooo... It was as if av never seen two ppl fight b4... The cool dude beat d hell out of d driver... #LOL

There was also a day dat a driver came out of his bus angrily and abused our driver for wrong driving... He came to our driver's side tried to drag him down frm d bus but our driver jux ignored him and kept quiet... This driver rained different abuses on our driver till he alighted from the bus... U need to c d surprise on our faces when our driver alighted frm d bus... Our driver was so TALL dat the other driver's height did not get to his elbow... That was how dis other driver started begging our driver dat he didn't know it was him... #LOL

The GSM Callers are d set of ppl I hate most in d bus... They will always disturb u wit their useless conversation after having a stressful day... By their conversation u shall know their life history... Mtcheeeewwww

All d same I always enjoy going home in a bus cos of the comic relief... #Eko4Show

De abokki DAT enters de bus wit a smelling perfume. But smiles at everyone as if he is a celebrity

Afghanistan:
Hahaha the newspaper borrower. "Bros abeg na today paper be that?".

noooooo.... Na last week paper.
newspaper borrower-"Abeg make I still see am"

StealthyMe:

Gbaam!

Though,they cud give birth to as many suits them...i get speechless when i see a fat lady with about three kids and doesn't hi want to pay for two seats

And then she goes ' Bros,abeg help me lap ur boy' even when she has the money!

.. Exactly.. Yeye false sense of entitlement

Lagos with different craze people, I deh inside bus one day, a beggar bought gala for a passenger.. I still get baffled each tym I remember

chinex276: U 4got d football fanatics, now dat 9ja drew yesterday, dey'll argue till d end of their journey.

LEMME SHARE DIS STORY WITH U::

one day while coming frm wrk, i wanted 2 enta a danfo, bt d only place i lyk siting is @ d frnt with d driver nd anothe passenger, so when i reached d bustop i headed 4 d frnt sit, only 2 find a man neatly dressed with suit there, so i joined him after about 20mins d man angrily left d bus nd went 4 another one becos one we were in was taking tym 2 full, after abt 5mins. I too left d bus nd went 2 another one sat at d frnt, lo nd behold it was desame man, after sometyms he angrily left 4 another bus which i unknowingly followed him 2, and met him at d frnt seat, wen d man looked at me, he said "guy na wetin na, y u dey follo me lyk dis, see anybody wey send u tell u no see me", mehn i vex coz oda pple don dey luk me one kind, den i told him, "shebi d moto na ur own, if u no wan siddon 4 public moto go buy ur own na", he den left 4 another bus, wen i thought abt it i jus cant help but laff out LOUD!

Bros u check ur pocket well after d man in suit left?

15. the pick pocket trying to disarm u of ur fone. he doesnt have bus stop until ur fone is in his hands.
16. the passenger, mostly women, with 7kids but paying for one seat.

MsNas: 11. The dirty mechanic that will wear his oily, grease-stained and filthy workshop clothes. Enters the bus and sits beside you like that. God help you if you're putting on white clothing, you will nearly enter the body of the next person beside you in a bid to avoid contact with them. The most annoying part is that they will feign ignorance and sit as comfortable as ever.

12. The one that will buy boiled eggs, gala, Lacasera, pure water and so on eat all through the journey. They will chew like locomotive engines when they eat their bounty and if you're lucky they might even throw grenades (Farts)

13. The fat woman that is supposed to pay for two seats but will pay for one and you will be squeezed like tuna in a can.

14. The newspaper borrower

Oh, I could go on and on!! Lagos is in a class of its own mehn. I don miss

16.abi when d conductor will shout e wole pelu change o meaning( enter with your change o) and 2 to 3 passengers will enter with 1000 naira
17.when hold up tight and passengers use materials to fan because of sweat.
etc

adebisiolumide5: Please how do i get to ejigbo from Opebi Allen in Ikeja using public buses. and how much would it cost please help me oo.. its urgent..

take NAPEP to under bridge. Walk towards that glass building after the bridge towards Otigba. Take Egbeda. Take ikotun from Egbeda and drop @ idimu. Take a bike to Ejigbo from Idimu.

chinex276: U 4got d football fanatics, now dat 9ja drew yesterday, dey'll argue till d end of their journey.

LEMME SHARE DIS STORY WITH U::

one day while coming frm wrk, i wanted 2 enta a danfo, bt d only place i lyk siting is @ d frnt with d driver nd anothe passenger, so when i reached d bustop i headed 4 d frnt sit, only 2 find a man neatly dressed with suit there, so i joined him after about 20mins d man angrily left d bus nd went 4 another one becos one we were in was taking tym 2 full, after abt 5mins. I too left d bus nd went 2 another one sat at d frnt, lo nd behold it was desame man, after sometyms he angrily left 4 another bus which i unknowingly followed him 2, and met him at d frnt seat, wen d man looked at me, he said "guy na wetin na, y u dey follo me lyk dis, see anybody wey send u tell u no see me", mehn i vex coz oda pple don dey luk me one kind, den i told him, "shebi d moto na ur own, if u no wan siddon 4 public moto go buy ur own na", he den left 4 another bus, wen i thought abt it i jus cant help but laff out LOUD!

my true life story, ogba 3weeks ago!

purplesummer: Then the lady on the low waist jean flashing her butt at any body who is plagued with the misfortune of sitting behind her

And those on lowcut ('low waist') jeans pulling it up (or their tops down) constantly as if they didn't know before putting it on that It's designed to show off the as's .

adebisiolumide5:

Which Area do I take da bus going to OSHODI?? IS AT TOYIN STRT. OR FRONT OF TFC??

find ur way to allen bus stop

Also the sports analyst..it takes jst 2 people to turn everywhere into a stadium..asif na dem dey play.

NL gals sabi lie eh ......common gerrat *in phyno's voice*

Onegai: Craziest story from a danfo coming up now!

On a sunday, decided to go pick up my hard-drive from my brother (he's on the island, I was then in S/lere). I got to Shitta and instead of taking a cab, decided to do alaroro and enter bus to the island.
At CMS, I boarded a bus going to Lekki. The woman beside me was smacking her lips on a sachet of pure water and was dressed like a "busstop geh" (not ashi, but like someone who hangs out with area boys). As soon as the bus was full and the conductor started taking fares, she calmly and loudly began to ask each person to pay her fare (with no shame and no begging). She argued with the conductor until out of "let this noise end", another customer paid. Me, I jejely brought out my phone to keep busy (and not make eye contact).

She made a point of helping me announce my b/stop (I didn't ask her o!). I dropped off at the stop and she got off too. Me, I walked quickly into the estate. Like 20 mins later, I was home and decided to get some chicken from the fridge. Our flats have windows facing out the kitchen in front (Lord knows why 1004 is designed with no privacy in mind). Suddenly someone started ringing and banging our neighbour's door, it was made. I tried to look out and that was when THAT SAME LADY FROM THE BUS spotted me! Immediately she came to our door and started doing the same. I told my bro (he got angry) and he answered the door. Same brazen, cocky manner from this lady: she said she knew me, we were friends, she had business with me, they should tell me to come outside to meet her! She refused to leave till we called security and even then she sat by the crescent gate, waiting for me to come out. My brother ended up driving me home.

Trust my mama to have sharp Nigerian mama tongue: "you'll be carrying natural hair up and down, wearing ankara with oily face, she thought you were poor and at her level!"

Epathra: take NAPEP to under bridge. Walk towards that glass building after the bridge towards Otigba. Take Egbeda. Take ikotun from Egbeda and drop @ idimu. Take a bike to Ejigbo from Idimu.

wicked description, Israelite journey, girl, u wicked

sexyseun: wicked description, Israelite journey, girl, u wicked

Normally, I don't give cognisance to comments like this buh we have too many of your breeds running loose hence, the need to curb ΐτ̅. Mind you, ΐτ̅'s usually safer to consult Ʊя̩̥̊ brain before Ʊя̩̥̊ mouth and fingers but I'm not surprised coz I've been warned not underestimated hediots esp on a faceless forum and on the keypad.
You shld have just given Ʊя̩̥̊ desription.

Lol..ds is soo true n vry vry funny

Well make I No lie sha,am guilty of always borrowing newspaper in d bus especially sport dailies!!

adebisiolumide5: Please how do i get to ejigbo from Opebi Allen in Ikeja using public buses. and how much would it cost please help me oo.. its urgent..

Get to oshodi then take ejigbo
Thank me later

This really is funny....

Everything happens in Lagos. Once you can think about it, just know it already happens in Lagos.

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rusher14: [/size][size=10pt][/size]

Better than the guy that reads over your shoulder and holds your hand as you flip the page....Na you and am buy the paper?

I can't stop laughing.

sexyseun: hahahhahahahaha , it could have been worse if he also slammed his hair bald

Hehehe

I nor even remember im hair cut ; i just dey observe him actions....e don dey look me again oo

Celebrity things!!!

rightym: De abokki DAT enters de bus wit a smelling perfume. But smiles at everyone as if he is a celebrity

Ogba peeps plenty here. My own is, the two lovers who cant bear not to sit together, most times u see them at the back playing romantically with each other. Na u go comot your eye ni. the young university or secondary school leavers most especially girls gisting about their care free life. U cant help but eavesdrop on their conversation and wonder where all the young carefree days went. Sometimes, i wish i could be young again and without a care in d world .

travelling in Lagos could be so much fun..dis article reminded me of a day I was going to school.I boarded a bus going to yaba, wen we arrived Ikeja along(u know d normal traffic jam there).. we just heard a government pick up behind us paving for way trying to intimidate our driver... I tot he would just give way wen I heard d conductor shouted !.."ma fun won lono ooo...a won oloshi"...I was thinking it was joke ooo wen both vehicles started dragging the road ooo hitting themselves.. just like in d.Hollywood movie fast and furious...d passengers started shouting ooo"e je kin bole ooo eni pawa ooo"..our bus stopped so did d pick up...come and see show down..lollz..the government officials ran away after 3mins of battle ..lol everyone was just watching as men on suit and tie battling with agberos.. at d end,d conductor stole a vehicle engine from dem..dey denied it at 1st tho only to joke with it during d journey....all Dis happened on a Monday morning ooo

Djicemob: You must bring your change o

What of those ones that'll fall asleep and awkwardly put their head on your chest.Damn! Especially those girls with old wigs.

naso

researchQ: The preacher who will preach and pray for the passengers then when the bus is about to move he will tell you to bring money aka sow seed to support his 'ministry'. Then you begin to wonder is he preaching so he can genuinely do the work of God or is he there collecting money from passengers for his own personal use?

Don't mind those jobless people, deceiving the feeble ones in the name of Evangelism. I dey pursue them tire for any bus wen I dey

emmabest2000: follow follow take it easy ooooo to avoid the story that touches the heart hmmm ....

i wasn't following him ooo... Me too dey luk 4 moto wey go full quick.

MsNas: 11. The dirty mechanic that will wear his oily, grease-stained and filthy workshop clothes. Enters the bus and sits beside you like that. God help you if you're putting on white clothing, you will nearly enter the body of the next person beside you in a bid to avoid contact with them. The most annoying part is that they will feign ignorance and sit as comfortable as ever.

12. The one that will buy boiled eggs, gala, Lacasera, pure water and so on eat all through the journey. They will chew like locomotive engines when they eat their bounty and if you're lucky they might even throw grenades (Farts)

13. The fat woman that is supposed to pay for two seats but will pay for one and you will be squeezed like tuna in a can.

14. The newspaper borrower

Oh, I could go on and on!! Lagos is in a class of its own mehn. I don miss

Jah bless ya 4 dat of boiled egg, i so much hate it.

Epathra: Normally, I don't give cognisance to comments like this buh we have too many of your breeds running loose hence, the need to curb ΐτ̅. Mind you, ΐτ̅'s usually safer to consult Ʊя̩̥̊ brain before Ʊя̩̥̊ mouth and fingers but I'm not surprised coz I've been warned not underestimated hediots esp on a faceless forum and on the keypad.
You shld have just given Ʊя̩̥̊ desription.

girl take a chill pill,just because you didn't understand him doesn't mean you should hurl insults @ him. He was tryna be funny. Where'd you bury your sense of humour?

@OP, you forgot about the lousy conductor who siezes every opportunity to insult and even fight with passengers, passersby, touts (agberos), even policemen. And the driver silently watches all these transpire.