laudate:


How many men have proposed to a girl while they were struggling or jobless & living in a one-room apartment? Do you know of any, as am yet to see one.

A lot of such men will tell the girl directly and indirectly that they are not financially ready to take a wife.....some even go as far as telling her to hold on by promising that things will get better. And in some cases, the poor girl does exactly that. She may even assist the guy financially from her meagre earnings, once in a while.

Once things improve, many guys start looking for excuses. That is when you hear stories like: "She is too old for my taste!"

Guy, you met this girl when she was 24, but now after spending time waiting for you to make up your mind and praying to God to improve your lot, she is now 32 years old. Suddenly, she has become old, abi? God dey!

Other stories you will hear include: "She is not from my area.." Bros, when she was using her small salary to go to the market and cook for you while you dated for more than 7 years, and when she was helping you with small loans in order to ease the financial pressure on you as well as letting you slake your lust in her body, you did not remember that one oh! Dia ris God, oh!

Or the last one: "My people said she is not good for me!" Chai! When you were poor and you were telling her to stick around because tomorrow would be bright, you did not ask your people's opinion oh! Now that you have exchanged your 'leggediz-benz' for a Kia Cerato, your family have suddenly decided to voice their opinion....

There is something called karma....

MRBrownJ:


so are you saying that women should just settle for ANYONE who ask for their hand in marriage, without a say on the matter? she is in love with some dude, and although they aint married yet, she believes in him, and is willing to wait for when the time will be right. go find another babe jo!



the above in bold is the main point of this issue.... a responsible guy knows a liability when he sees one, and if these babe are overlooked by "all" responsible guys then something must be really fishy about these leftover babes.

Nori:
am not trying to discredit what your saying, but sometimes things aren't always black and white. I know a lot of "lively" and "sharp" girls who are still looking for husbands, going for girls night out every weekend from one lounge or bar to another. some get attention from men but not from devoted men.

i had a friend who was referred to as "boring" and reserved, she just got married a few weeks ago to a young and promising dude, funny thing was girls who always used to tell her to loosen up and be more social and acted like they knew all about attracting guys were there as bridesmaids and asoebi wearers. its the same way some people work very hard and still amount to nothing, Gods ways are not our ways.

demmy0325:
.

nsiazu:
I think its ladies that usually cause themself not getting married coz they always want a guy that ends alot of money and have his land or car. The thing is that "A guy renting a house with a decent salary won't make him poor tomorrow". Ladies always look at a guy today and are forgetting that tomorrow is always better than today.
I've met great men and women and what they always tell me is that "They were very poor when they got married" but now they re damn rich coz they believed in each others dream.
Ladies of nairaland, please am begging you on my knees; God can send a poor guy to u n ask for marriage so please don't ignore and understand him and reason together with him so that u two can become rich together.

chrisbaba1:


For real, God works..... Me ive been athiest for very long but bro, now no one can tell me God aint real or prayers dont work..... some things are beyond what meets the eye....

bizmogul:
I have a couple of female friends who have gotten to the " age of marriage" like they say. Between the age range of 28 - 30. Now, these chics as far as I know them are not miscreants ( you know like the kongo aso girls that sleep around). I am not saying they have not done or they don't do but they are good chics. Two weeks ago, I had a discussion with one of them and she practically broke down in tears.

Why can't I get a husband? All my friends are getting married; the annoying thing is that most of these friends of mine I know how they live their dirty lives. I am just here being the good girl, going to Church and at the end of the day, I end up with a guy that doesn't appreciate me. Why are you guys like this? I am tired, she yelled emotionally!

Now, that's just one of them and the other who said she was tired of being a good girl and doing all that relationship kind of thing, she just needs to man who would come to her and just say " let's get married"... I can go on and on with their stories but I was just thinking...

There are lots of ladies out there looking for husbands and it's crazy for these because Men now take advantage of their condition. Some guys even go as far as promising them marriage just to get the cookies. Guys sha! I was wondering, is it that these chics are not doing something they ought to be doing? Is it that they don't position themselves to get the exact kind of guys that they want in their life? Or is it that they have behavioral issues or something? But so far I know, they are good people.

When ladies get to this " age of marriage" period, it seems like they put themselves under intense pressure. Like when they see their friends getting married and family and friends asking " when are you getting married?" it makes them want to jump into any man and I tell you, a brother can see through desperation somehow! I think ladies should try as much as they can not to give into this pressure, maybe they should focus on doing something else, get involved in a Church project, activities, join a group, develop themselves further and in the course of this they could find the man of their dreams.


I really don't know, but what do you think?

socrateez:
Life is a paradox with many unpredictable variables. Good things happen to bad people and bad things happen to good people. Some people marry early and die early, some don't get who to marry and live long. While you are despondent because you're single, remember your friends who are dead.

Your attitude to life depends on your interpretation of what life throws at you, but your best bet is to give it a positive interpretation. Look around you, you will see people who are praying for what you despise. So, lift up your spirit, be hopeful and dance; one day you will sink into oblivion so, while you pray and trust Him for today, also thank God for your life.

focusM:


So u know God works so why are still an atheist?

braine:
Who would marry 28/30 year olds, when there are cute 21/23 graduates ripe for marriage? Lol. They should move to one corner jare.

winie:
sorry o, I don't know how this PM thing works. Don't even knw how to access it. Its well. Cheers!

adejarebanjoko:
as it is with women so also with men too, pls don't get me wrong i was in a relationship for 6 years with a lady, she went for NYSC and just 3 months into her service she started acting strange, that is how 6 years went down the drain. i nearly died of heart break it took me a year and some months to get over the heart break and now i wish to get back on my feet.

focusM:


You are a big mugu

braine:



And what does dat make you?

saintfizzo:

Yes it is.... I'm researching the topic "Fear of being alone"

holamiday:
I tried to send you an email at win992004@yahoo.com...that email addy is dead.



I read your comment on you & your fiance and i was really touched to say the least. I could feel the friendship-gone-sour air that suddenly overwhelmed your relationship just because of sex & i understand what it feels like to see your lover walk away. Quickly, i'd like to tell you something strange about men.

You see, men like submission. Every man wants his woman to totally submit to him 100%. That's just the way we are wired. We hate it when you women say a thing & expect it to stand-even when you're right. I'd use myself as an example. Often, when i demand something from my girlfriend, i never take 'no' for an answer no matter how distraught & unhappy she may be & no matter how unreasonable my request may seem. At that moment, for the most part, all i want from her is to submit to me, & then i'd lovingly grant her request & let things go her own way. The focal point is in her submission. If she wants 'a' & i want 'b', i feel better when she accepts 'b' & then i'd deliberately change my mind & allow 'a'. I never want it to be 'a' because she insisted on 'a'. I want her to bend to my will first, before i bend to hers. Men don't want to be the first to bend. I hope you get that drill.

I have a strong feeling(it's awkward though & i don't know why) that your fiance may not have slept with you if you had given in to sex. I stand to be corrected anyway. I really perceive all he wanted from you was submission. Trust me, that guy didn't leave you because you witheld sex, rather he did, because you seemed to want to dictate to him & he detested that. It's good you know this about men. It's a sure potent anaesthetic to our hearts. Men value submissive women more than anything & those women usually have more power to influence their men. Next time you fall in love, accept his request with tears, make it clear you're doing that solely for love & if he loves you, he'll deliberately let things go your way.
Play with this psychology of men & you'll be amazed at the ease it'd bring. I wish you all the best. Cheers!

alobam1:
Hmmmm,Have you stopped to ask those friends of yours their attitude towards members of the opposite sex?Ohh they might be religious,but they might have a very very repulsive behaviour..Like my ex,Seeing her for the first time you would think she is the holiest of all.but when you get close you would know her attitude is nothing to write home about..I tried my best to change her but she never ever wanted to change..She naggs,transfers aggression,goes moddy for days yet she is a church goer..she is born again but her attitude to her fellow man,woman is very very repulsive..Almost everyabody complains about her,Her roomates,family,friends and yet she complains about everybody and everything..I told her I pray she does not end up marrying just anybody when she has used her attitude in sending prospective suitors away..

Tell your friends to watch their behaviour..No Man is looking for a virgin,No Man is looking for a perfect person,All what we need is a woman that we would understand..not someone who's attitude is very very repulsive..

My 2cents

bizmogul:


They are decent and working class girls. As far as I know....

precisionindepth:
i said more Dan 5 every Fri sat and even during the week. every with no Saturday left out.

Eze2000:
I'm a 35 yr old man also looking for my dream woman for immediate marriage. I'm desperate but careful in my search so I have looking for 4 yes now.
I've discovered 2 things. one a dream partner doesn't come ready made like we dream it, and 2 no one is perfect. But the upsetting thing is every single lady wants to marry a rich and handsome man even with so much poverty and hardship so commonplace. Funnily these rich guys and their families want to marry a lady of their own class meanwhile the guys are busy sleeping with and lying to all the other girls who want them..... consequently the 'leftover old cargos'.
An intelligent hard-working man with God's blessings and a loving supportive wife can become rich tomorrow and a rich man with all d world poor overnight.....a wise girl should bear this in mind and seek a man who will love and cherish her.
(Tall, big in build (tall), full figured and gentle natured and religious) if there exists any lady with these qualities, plus wisdom and a reasonable heart, ready for marriage then would I like to know her.
{ my BBM pin 51598DE3 / e-mail omegastar293@gmail.com}

ferdimako:
number of women is more than men's.

lynn360:
Good points you've made, we ladies have to watch it...our attitudes towards the opposite sex could be appalling most times...all boils down to the so called shakara we were made to believe is the best way to get a man

bizmogul:


I wish I could but the issue of trust comes in here. I once connected 2 of my female friends to my male friends, it didn't work. One of my friends lied, all he wanted was the big tits and the cookies according to her.

bizmogul:


Mhm... Good things come to those who wait right?

alobam1:


My dear,It might not even be the shakara itself..Shakara is good. But it depends at the way you go about it..Have asked ladies out who turned me down,I mean who said NO and we are still best of friends till today..I always pray for one of them to get someone better than me cos she deserves the best..

Am friends with them cos they got a good attitude and they said No then because of a good reason.

But when a lady now have a bad behaviour and attitude,Guys would run away from her. Even if Na she and Jesus Christ dey sleep on the same bed,people would just be making jest of her say she be devil..

Am 100percent okay with my current girlfriend,she gots all I need in a woman.I do ring it in her ears that if we don't get married the fault would be from her and not from me.

She is the most beautiful,neither is she a virgin,But she is the opposite of my ex...

To me,The defination of a bad girl is not a girl that sleeps around alone,No,if you have a very bad attitude and behaviour,weather you are a virgin,you are nothing but a bad girl and you are in the same position as a girl that sleeps around.Shikena

lynn360:
Good points you've made, we ladies have to watch it...our attitudes towards the opposite sex could be appalling most times...all boils down to the so called shakara we were made to believe is the best way to get a man