You having money means nothing. What is the point of her getting a degree if she's gonna spend her entire time being knocked up.

@ D RELOADED NOBODY SAID SHE SHOULD NOT WORK NOBODY SAID SHE SHOULD BE A HOUSEWIFE BUT BECAUSE SHE WANTS TO WORK THAT MEANS SHE HAS TO HAVE ONLY ONE CHILD ABI? IF THATS THE PATTERN EVERYONE FOLLOWED HOW MANY OF US HER WILL HAVE BROTHERS AND SISTERS?
4 HER TO HAVE MOVED OUT SHE MUST NOT WANT TO HAVE ANY MORE CHILDREN!! WHY DOES SHE FEEL SO STRONGLY ABT IT SHE HAD TO LEAVE HER MATRIMONIAL HOME? SHE MUST BE MAD!

sometimes you have to marry "sensible" rather than "fine".

WORD!!!!!

CHNAGE URE WAYS BE LESS SERIOUS TAKE HER OUT FOR A NICE TIME MAKE HER LOVE U BY DOING ALL THE THIGNS U REALISED U DIDDNT GIVE HER. BE LESS SERIOUS LIKE SHE SUGGESTED SWEEP HER OFF HER FEET NOT BY MONEY OR EXPENSIVE GIFTS SHE HAS ENOFF OF THAT BY SWEET THINGS
TELL HER YOU WANT HER TO COME OVER JUST TO DISCUSS EVERTYTHING FINALLY: DO NOT DISCUSS THE PRESNT ISSUES AT ALL
instead try these tips start frm the surprise dinner and mix and match from there.

CANDLE LIT DINNER
GOING TO THE MOVIES
ORGANISING A SURPRISE PIKnic SOMEWEAR OVER LOOKING THE BEACH
BUYING HEr NICE UNDERWEAR
GOING OUT FOR THINGS LIKE KARAOKE
SURPISE DINNER + SURPRISE DRESS
SURPRISE MAKEOVER HAVE IT ALL PLANNED OUT WITH THE HAIR STYLISTS AND ALL
TRESURE HUNT IN THE HOUSE  TO FIND THE PRIZE WHICH CAN BE SOMETHING NICE LIKE A NICE PIKTURE U KNOW SHE LOVES ALTERED TO LLOK LIKE A CARTOON OR SOMETHING PLAYFULL AND SWEET
GETTING APUPPY, 
THE LIST IS ENDLESS

u have found money now find time. goodluck.

@waterworks
Why don't u use small letters for your writing. Kind of find it difficult reading your write ups which is always capitalised.

stay blessed

JJYOU:

what medication would you recommend this guy go on for the 4yrs ma'am? 4yrs is a long time to waste.

Nahh it ain't that serious oo, i say in the mean time they work on other pressing issues in their relationship, theres obviously discord in the relationship

Little wonder they cant stand each other??

U can just 'throw in the towel' every time there seem to be a glitch in a marriage,

Hopefully in four years they'll be able to better understand themselves and then work together as one in regards to having the whole children thing!!

@ eko boy
because im at work and alwys sneeking to nairaland. when i start writing i dont even have time to change the letters. i always try to type really fast before enione catches me.

ill try more.

hey mr man,

sad you have to go thru this!
looks like she doesn't want to be a wifey anymore and go play with friends, party etc,
like you said she is fine so i think she is taking advantage of this now!

but looks like she has misplaced priority, the time for going out was b4 she got hitched!

if she hasn't got feelings for you anymore, please let her be and try and maintain a good relationship with her because of your child.
It might noe be easy but you are a man and it is a man's world!
There are many women who will admire an ambitious guy like you ( but please you need to balance work and home to have a succesful marriage).

wish you the best.

Why don't you get some other woman knocked up? Afterall you are a man, you can get away with it!

sorry jo, my guy told me already that he want 4 o 5 children from me n im so confused

hello it's certain your wife wants to quit the marriage is not interested in having more kids with you.

The problem lies with this guy. I mean he stated that he wants 3 kids by age 35! He also said that the wife moved out because of all the pressure in thier home due to this issue and he asking for advice? If your wife want to work on her career before having another child, just compromise! I don't see the big deal unless you are not telling us the whole story.

IF you want MUMU you for go village , the problem is that those ones too don dey get sense.
Forget Advice me, and learn to compromise,
you want more children your wife wants a better future for herself and of cos th family,
simple thing, begin to send flowers to that your mother in law house, as for the mother in law, begin to respect her jump down from your high horse she was a single mum ( no be crime) after all if she did not bring your wife up to your taste you for no marry am,
Create harmony around your home, all women are the same,e.g , some of us act submissive and build houses behind the man back,while some of us will put our feet down and say i am building a house,
All na the same #
donot forget that WOMAN is now up to date , check out michelle obama and how she has helped her husband,her belief in him thier home is in harmony but =does she look like a push around, NOOOO!
Romatically find your way back into your wife's heart and babies will follow,
May be the first one you did not help in changing diapers sef na him the woman look am say who sia,
Donot bother follow the so called wife na slave tradition that Business model as expired, so write your own unique one.



Love your wife ,don't only love her, show her you love her and all that your gray hair will return back to its normal black , if not e nu lo wa ye,
Pele!!!

what do u expect from a family of divorcee
she's not a correct woman cos i've seen women with 4 to 7 children and they still look sexually attractive.
Don't stress urself,lots of beautiful and good women r waitin 4 u.
i hope u've heard learnt ur lessons on ur choice of women.u need a woman that stays at home.

I don't like judging anyone, & I don't interfere in marital matters cos, the root of the problem is only known by just the man and the wife., so judging from one side of the story is simply unfair.

@OP
One thing I'll like you to be sure of is if that child is actually yours. Anything is possible, and it is said that "it is only the woman that knows the father of her child".

Try everything possible to settle scores with ur mother in-law if that's the only way to have access to your dear daughter. You have to swallow ur pride for her sake. "When you want to catch a goat, you have to behave like a goat". If you eventually succeed, don't hesitate to take her for a DNA test. If she happens to be ur child, then you seek a lawyer's advice on how to go about the issue. If on the other hand, your wife played a fast one on you, then you simply forget you once had a wife and daughter, and move on with ur life.
My 2 kobo

well, i have and idea, if u are the type that knows your wife's menstrual cycle and can follow it to when she is most fertile, this should be a piece of cake
now read very carefully,

, agree to what ever she says, dont argue, and since obviously she doesnt want babies yet, tell her u understand how she feels. take her out to a spectacular dinner,smooch, kiss do whatever it is you do, then when you start feeling the heat, take her to a pharmacy, but a pack of very gooood condoms in front her, and then go home and before u start having a go at it, make sure she is comfortable in bed, excuse yourself with the pack of condoms, make sure she doesnt notice, go into your bathroom and punch as many holes in the thing as possible,
return to ur bedroom, turn the light down low and get it on!,
by the time you do this 3 to 4 times, i'm pretty sure you will score you mark, but be careful, make sure u dont get caught!

Afribiz:

I don't like judging anyone, & I don't interfere in marital matters cos, the root of the problem is only known by just the man and the wife., so judging from one side of the story is simply unfair.

@OP
One thing I'll like you to be sure of is if that child is actually yours. Anything is possible, and it is said that "it is only the woman that knows the father of her child".

Try everything possible to settle scores with ur mother in-law if that's the only way to have access to your dear daughter. You have to swallow ur pride for her sake. "When you want to catch a goat, you have to behave like a goat". If you eventually succeed, don't hesitate to take her for a DNA test. If she happens to be ur child, then you seek a lawyer's advice on how to go about the issue. If on the other hand, your wife played a fast one on you, then you simply forget you once had a wife and daughter, and move on with ur life.
My 2 kobo

BB Anne:

well, i have and idea, if u are the type that knows your wife's menstrual cycle and can follow it to when she is most fertile, this should be a piece of cake
now read very carefully,

, agree to what ever she says, dont argue, and since obviously she doesnt want babies yet, tell her u understand how she feels. take her out to a spectacular dinner,smooch, kiss do whatever it is you do, then when you start feeling the heat, take her to a pharmacy, but a pack of very gooood condoms in front her, and then go home and before u start having a go at it, make sure she is comfortable in bed, excuse yourself with the pack of condoms, make sure she doesnt notice, go into your bathroom and punch as many holes in the thing as possible,
return to ur bedroom, turn the light down low and get it on!,
by the time you do this 3 to 4 times, i'm pretty sure you will score you mark, but be careful, make sure u dont get caught!

good people still dey amongst us. thank you

anne, this your method na wao

I'm very sorry for your post. , but i just want you to think back about the oldies, you married for beauty and not for good character or behaviour, marriage is a thing of life time, not just fling stuff, im sorry mate, you guys you have a heart 2 heart discussion, in short are you ugly, can't you get another good character woman since your present wife wants to watch her figure and face her career for 6yrs, abah, na only she dey face career, she no wan get pikin at her age or what?

I've no experience in the subject-matter so I'll keep shut. I'll say this as well: I'd advise you guys to be careful in shooting off your mouths on this forum. Your post-names don't conceal your identities as much as you'd think

@ poster,

i was 1s in ur shoes,This is what you will do, pay all this school small boys to mount vigillance on her mum,especially during festive times that she is most likely to visit her mum,as soon as they have a sight of ur stupid wife and ur daughter,they will ring u,n u can move in with the police and take the child by force from her, ,she will have no other option that to negotiate with you, upon that,u can sign legal papers allowing you to see the child when ever you wish to,and also stating that dicision regarding the child should be a contribution of both parties.My brother that was what i did,she tried to sue for my asset n cash but i was smarter than her,she only got d car i bought for her and N129,000 as directed by court, take it easy my bro,by the time u strike,she will feel d same way u've felt all this while, goodluck,

I doubt she`s nigerian.

hmm

.

osisi2:


At what point did you know she was vain?
I'm sure you saw this coming at some point but her beauty blinded you.
You'll pick more carefully next time.

.

who says you can't bear children and have a career?
I'm a good example of such.
she's found another man
simple!

!

she is sick of the marriage and doesn't want to be tied down with 2 kids from your loins.
The marriage is over
you need to accept this reality

.

No
It's the problem with marrying a shallow airhead brought up by a  divorced man-eating mother.
I'm sure you saw the warnings and ignored them

.

[size=20pt]You'll be a fool to beg her to return
She's too immature for marriage and will make your life a living hell because she'll move out whenever she doesn't get her way.
she wants to be free because she's unable to handle the sacrifices, compromises and selflessness that comes with marriage and raising a family.[/size] [size=18pt]BITTER TRUTH (THESE ARE THE TYPES BEING RAISED TODAY....UNFORTUNATELY. THEY THINK MARRIAGE IS ALL ABOUT THE CHURCH AND COLOURFUL RECEPTION PARTIES AND THE BEAUTIFUL WEDDING GOWN)[/size]

remember she was raised in a household without a man (as you said later) where her mother's words were law.
She sees you as useless afterall her mother raised her without a husband.
And she's treated you as a nobody in her affairs and that of "her" child.

My brother let her be,before you die young

@OP,
I try to feel your pain...your feeling of failure (especially when you have always suceeded in almost all your major feats over the years). Follow one of the major advice though...let her be for a while and distract yourself with one of the healthy things you love doing like sports and others (not those bad stuffs o)and keep fighting for the unity of your family ,especially for your daughter's sake in the place of prayers...if God so wishes, he will grant you your request, if God has something better in stock for you, then, you may have to move on with your life (painful and easier said than experienced)

Pls, use this situation in your life to get closer to your God, there is always an advantage in every disadvantage....a blessing in every disappointment. Life after here is the ultimate.

NB. I am sinner myself but I aint going to give up on myself and I still know as long as I have 1 day left here, God will stand I for me and put me on the right path!