no

if they needed specific medical care that i could afford but i am not qualified to give - then YES as much as i love my mum i would put her in a nursing home and pay the best i can afford for it.

if it is out of OLD AGE then NO i would not put her in a nursing home - she can stay with me - that is why a good relationship between my furture husband and his inlaws and me and my in-laws is very importnat to me

No, because my mom strongly warned us not to put them there when they get really old - She knows, she works there.

That doesn't mean they'll live with me though, it's a burden or so i think. . .If I'm stanky rich by then, I'll just hire nurses who'll be coming to their house to take care of them.

My mother has had Alzheimers for the past 2 years. She does not know us or herself any longer. She has lost her memory and wears adult diapers. She was once a strong mother full of love and care but but now stared blankly into our eyes. Bathing my mother or changing her diaper has been a humbling experience for me. I do it proudly. We had to have a meeting and we decided NEVER to put my mother in a home. Most of the old folk are riddled with bed sores and rashes. She now resides with my older sister who is not employed and most of us go to work. Its not easy seeing your parent like that. It needs understanding and most of all love. A nursing home will never give my mother love, and love is needed for everything that is done for her today. I can still give her the same tablets at home. Its not like she's on oxygen or something.Taking care of your parent is not easy but I think its the best option, and when the time comes, it lets them die with dignity. Dignity of being clean, well fed and most of all loved. Its the best way to honour my mother, and I do it proudly.

No way!!
they are more precious to me than that.

I hope not.

No way you must be having a laugh, i no be oyinbo wey no care

If nursing homes were available in Naija i would put them there, it's more care and peace of mind than either of my folks showed any of us.

naija old parents dont need care home they are usually strong and when they become really old and prune they kind of start acting like a little child and their memory is not stable and  no i wouldnt put them in care homes God forbid they go in one of those places by Gods grace. ota o ni gbawon lowo mi, won de ni shaisan loru ko jesu amin.

ezinne1212:

If nursing homes were available in Naija i would put them there, it's more care and peace of mind than either of my folks showed any of us.

Why? do you really think it's more care and peace there?

Hell no, they stay with me!!!

Except they have a serious illness like dementia or whatever.

Same applies to wifey's parents.

No.

No no no.

I once met an elderly woman in a shop and we got talking. She informed me that she was in a nursing home and that the Nursing Home Manger had to give consent for her to visit the shop. Needless to say the elderly woman let me know that she found this humiliating. I asked her what she was doing in a nursing home seeing that she was a very strong and healthy looking woman who did not look as old (75) as she claimed. She said that she hated the place and that she would never forgive her daughter for putting her in a home. She said that her only child (the daughter) took control of her finances and forcefully placed her into the care home system although she begged her not to.

She said when she lived on her own she had many friends and attended many functions with her friends but in the Nursing home, this was impossible surrounded as she was with paraplegics.

She said she had worked all her life to make sure her daughter had a very good education and upbringing. The old woman decried the fact that her daughter repaid her in this manner, placing her in a home.

She told me that she hated her daughter and no longer spoke to her. This elderly woman said that she was not ashamed to admit that she prayed to god every night to do to her daughter what her daughter did to her.

Loads of British born blacks particularly the ones married to oyibos, who tends to loose all focus on reality are forcefully taking over their parent’s property and finances and pushing them into old people’s home. The parents hate it but are powerless to do anything.

I have heard of so many cases of this particularly amongst people from the Caribbean community whose children are born in Britain. At the rate the African community are choosing to abandon their cultural heritage I can see them following along the same path in a few years.

Liedetect:

I once met an elderly woman in a shop and we got talking. She informed me that she was in a nursing home and that the Nursing Home Manger had to give consent for her to visit the shop. Needless to say the elderly woman let me know that she found this humiliating. I asked her what she was doing in a nursing home seeing that she was a very strong and healthy looking woman who did not look as old (75) as she claimed.  She said that she hated the place and that she would never forgive her daughter for putting her in a home. She said that her only child (the daughter) took control of her finances and forcefully placed her into the care home system although she begged her not to.

She said when she lived on her own she had many friends and attended many functions with her friends but in the Nursing home, this was impossible surrounded as she was with paraplegics.

She said she had worked all her life to make sure her daughter had a very good education and upbringing. The old woman decried the fact that her daughter repaid her in this manner, placing her in a home.

She told me that she hated her daughter and no longer spoke to her. This elderly woman said that she was not ashamed to admit that she prayed to god every night to do to her daughter what her daughter did to her.

Loads of British born blacks particularly the ones married to oyibos, who tends to loose all focus on reality are forcefully taking over their parent’s property and finances and pushing them into old people’s home. The parents hate it but are powerless to do anything.

I have heard of so many cases of this particularly amongst people from the Caribbean community whose children are born in Britain. At the rate the African community are choosing to abandon their cultural heritage I can see them following along the same path in a few years.

holy mary jesus and joseph this is the most  most pathetic thing ive ever heared so those folks in care might not like the idea? that poor woman but are you sure she's in her sane mind? cos not all of them go into care cos they are old, some of them suffer from schizophrenia so no matter how normal they seem they cant live alone must be monitored and on medication till they fully recover but if otherwise then her daughter is a bitch, i'm sure there must be an inspection or approval by local authorities cos people cant just shove people into homes but that is not fair darn

Reading most of the responses above I feel people need to be more educated and more open minded about adult care and Nursing homes. Having a nursing home cater for elderly ones does not mean abandoning them. It actually shows how much you care for them and how much you want to ensure they live long.

Did you guys know that Life expectancy of Nigerians at Birth is 46 years? and at age 60 it is 15.5 years? and in a population of about 165mill only 3-4 % are 65 and above? This is so because there is no social security, pensions are unpaid for those that are pensionable, most families cannot afford basic health care for the elderly as such they manage and in the process give their loved ones less than the best leading to their early demise and at the same time ruining their marriages and careers. The elderly are isolated socially from their peers and so have little reason to live longer thinking they are already too old as it is?

Do you also know that the government does nothing to cater for the elderly?

On the other end of the spectrum we have poor quality Nursing homes. If there were good quality homes with the assisted living houses where an elderly couple or even one of them can be accommodated in a well furnished apartment  within the facility where all their needs are taken care of from Medical to social and all the kids have to do is pay and visit. I feel this is very good as it will not end up destroying your marriage, your parents will not feel deserted and you will be rest assured that they are in good hands.

People have to open their eyes to see the world is changing and if we try to stay stuck to the Typical tradition of maintaining our beliefs about family then maybe we should not go look for white collar jobs and stay home fetching firewood and selling groundnut in front of our houses. That way we will not have to worry about balancing modern life with traditional values.

Never.
Nurses can be taking care of him at home if needs be.

i know my gram wasnt to keen on going to a nursing home (run by the convent her two sisters and daughter belonged to) but after she was there she wshed she had gone sooner. I know some old folks who hate it and others who love it. (in the US the highest increase rate of new hiv infections isnt in the teens or early 20's like most countries bu in the elderly, there is more bed hoppin going on there then in a frat house). it ll depends on the faciliy and what it does. some arebasicaly full apatments that have a nuse station in the lobby while others are hell hole institutions

i pray GOD makes me rich, i dnt mind getting nurses for my parents,and still takecare of them too on my own

no. Will hire a caregiver to look after them in my house when I have to work.

No way am not oyinbo person

ayomidej:

No way am not oyinbo person

oh yes cause we are the only ones who do it right wtf

Lol