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13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. - Romance - Nairaland

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13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Toks2008(m): 10:57pm On Oct 27, 2015
It is the wish of many ladies to get married and while some ladies are fully prepared for the institution,many are totally naive about what lies ahead after saying i do but from my little experience in life, i present to you 10 things no mother or pastor will tell you before you say i do to that man.

1.That no matter how sweet the man is to you,no matter how caring and romantic and no matter how many prophets told you he is your man,that sweet man can turn to a demon after saying i do so what it seems before marriage is never a guaranty of what it will be after marriage.

2.If your man beats or cheats on you when you are courting,there is a 90% possibility that he will do even worse after marrying you and you need to understand that it is a big mistake to marry a man with the hope that he will change some characters you don't like but just learn to love him that way or take a walk.

3.If your man beats you once,it could be a mistake but if he beats you the second time then its a habit he is likely never going to stop.

4.That it is good to marry a man you have feelings for but it is a terrible thing to marry a man who does not desire you as much as you desire him.

5.That if you marry a man because of what he has and not because of mutual love then be ready to be miserable in that marriage as long as it lasts.

6.That a man can love you with all his life and could still cheat on you because most men think with that thing down there when it comes to their feelings for women and are polygamous in nature and no matter how sweet and disciplined you are,it will not stop him from cheating on you and divorcing a cheating hubby is no guaranty that the next man won't do worse.

7.As a lady, as long as you are sexually decent,GOD fearing,an excellent cook,financially independent and humble,you have absolutely nothing to fear because it will be extremely difficult for your man to disrespect you much less divorce you.

8.That not all men are calm but some have innate tendency to be violent so you must try at all cost to avoid any form of confrontation.

9.That women are women worst enemies and many of your female friends will be glad to see your marriage crumble so avoid discussing your marital flaws with them but take it to God in prayers and you must block your ears from hear says and believe what your hubby tells you even when you have an irking that he is lieing and whatever you have not seen does not exist.

10.That there is always a lady out there who is ready to push you out of your matrimony and take your place but 90% of men who cheat on their wives are not ready to divorce their wives but it is these wives that push the man out with impatience and hot temper so you will need lots of patience to deal with a philanderer because in most cases,they always come back home after having their feel of the side dishes.

11.That no man owns the key to your marital happiness except you because most men are the same and no man is worth the stress and as soon as you are married,you should focus on building your life as well as that of your child(ren).

12.That no marriage is perfect but every marriage has its own perculiar challenges and you must be ready to work on your marital pasture to look green cos that greener marital pasture you see on the other side have been worked so work on yours and remember that a happy union is not between two compactible people or two romantic people but its the one between two forgivers so learn to forgive and you will have a happy union.

13.That no matter how careful you may be in choosing a spouse,marriage will always be a black market where you must prepare for unforeseen situation and there is no right or wrong choice of man but what we have is your choice and what you make out of it and only GOD can guaranty a happy marriage.

Hope these make some sense.

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Beesluv: 10:58pm On Oct 27, 2015
good

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:00pm On Oct 27, 2015
Yup! SOME sense

1 Like

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by UncleLondon: 11:13pm On Oct 27, 2015
You made sense bro

May you never stumble and may you rise to the top and never fall and while you are rising may the steps to the top for you never be like this.

Oya call that lalasticlala make he do wetin he sabi do.

12 Likes 3 Shares

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:22pm On Oct 27, 2015
"What some married women dnt understand is, that their husband is having sex with other ladies out there doesnt make them less of a wife, lover, mother..., a man can actually love u and still have sex outside. This is because a real man have sex with his d!ck and not his emotions, meanline a woman having sex outside her marriage is slowly destroying it because most times women have sex not only with their vagina but also with their emotion grin that is why a cheating husband will not allow his wife cheat bck." As said by a married level mate.

154 Likes 15 Shares

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:24pm On Oct 27, 2015
Wonders shall never end shocked

So man get mind to say woman of a cheating partner is impatient

No one wan take responsibility again o

Oya let's keep passing it around

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by kinibigdeal(m): 11:24pm On Oct 27, 2015
Its natural
Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Pr0ton: 11:24pm On Oct 27, 2015
That you may suck his d!ck all the days of your sexlife...

mum won't tell you that, let alone a pastor. smiley

18 Likes 1 Share

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:32pm On Oct 27, 2015
classicB:
"What some married women dnt understand is, that their husband is having sex with other ladies out there doesnt make them less of a wife, lover, mother..., a man can actually love u and still have sex outside. This is because a real man have sex with his d!ck and not his emotions, meanline a woman having sex outside her marriage is slowly destroying it because most times women have sex not only with their vagina but also with their emotion grin that is why a cheating husband will not allow his wife cheat bck." As said by a married level mate.


Wow! She's right! Says a married fellow in my circle smiley

2 Likes

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:35pm On Oct 27, 2015
pinceprinz:



Wow! She's right! Says a married fellow in my circle smiley
Aint married yet bro.

1 Like

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:47pm On Oct 27, 2015
daretodiffer:
Wonders shall never end shocked

So man get mind to say woman of a cheating partner is impatient

No one wan take responsibility again o

Oya let's keep passing it around


Cheating in my opinion can be categorised. There are some married men that cheat on their wives and make her understand that they actually have a mistress, these kind of men deny their wives her conjugal right, they deprive her of emotional attention and some other things. I can say men that belongs here do not love their wives. Meanwhile there are some married men that only "sleep outside" they do all they can to prevent their wives from knowing, these kind of people respect their wives enough, they dnt deny her of her right neither do they punish her emotionally.
Lemme tell about our driver, this man loves his wife so much that he is the one that buys her underwear shocked cater for all her needs and so on, yet this man has a mistress, he belongs to the second category
I dnt know why men cheat anyway.
But a man that loves u belongs with u no matter how many ladies he straffs per day cry youre his lover, his wife, the mother of his kids, i dnt know why some frustrated bitches shud bother u
Abeg if ur husby belong to the first category you r on ur own o grin

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:47pm On Oct 27, 2015
classicB:
Aint married yet bro.
I deduced that from ur post. So?
Was just saying ur married friend is right ok? wink
Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:49pm On Oct 27, 2015
pinceprinz:


I deduced that from ur post. So?

Was just saying ur married friend is right ok? wink
I believe it is true
Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:55pm On Oct 27, 2015
classicB:

Cheating in my opinion can be categorised. There are some married men that cheat on their wives and make her understand that they actually have a mistress, these kind of men deny their wives her conjugal right, they deprive her of emotional attention and some other things. I can say men that belongs here do not love their wives. Meanwhile there are some married men that only "sleep outside" they do all they can to prevent their wives from knowing, these kind of people respect their wives enough, they dnt deny her of her right neither do they punish her emotionally.
Lemme tell about our driver, this man loves his wife so much that he is the one that buys her underwear shocked cater for all her needs and so on, yet this man has a mistress, he belongs to the second category
I dnt know why men cheat anyway.
But a man that loves u belongs with u no matter how many ladies he straffs per day cry youre his lover, his wife, the mother of his kids, i dnt know why some frustrated bitches shud bother u
Abeg if ur husby belong to the first category you r on ur own o grin

Why do men CHEAT?

Cheating is a human disease ok? But well, when it comes to keeping a single sexual partner, maybe the DNA of men shows greater affinity for multiple partners than the female's hence that feeling of being jilted when your species find out HE's fukcking someone else. My take!
Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 11:56pm On Oct 27, 2015
classicB:
I believe it is true
I know smiley
Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by dovelike(f): 11:57pm On Oct 27, 2015
11. That its gets to a stage where you can choose any man you want because of your accomplishments

10 Likes

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 12:28am On Oct 28, 2015
classicB:

Cheating in my opinion can be categorised. There are some married men that cheat on their wives and make her understand that they actually have a mistress, these kind of men deny their wives her conjugal right, they deprive her of emotional attention and some other things. I can say men that belongs here do not love their wives. Meanwhile there are some married men that only "sleep outside" they do all they can to prevent their wives from knowing, these kind of people respect their wives enough, they dnt deny her of her right neither do they punish her emotionally.
Lemme tell about our driver, this man loves his wife so much that he is the one that buys her underwear shocked cater for all her needs and so on, yet this man has a mistress, he belongs to the second category
I dnt know why men cheat anyway.
But a man that loves u belongs with u no matter how many ladies he straffs per day cry youre his lover, his wife, the mother of his kids, i dnt know why some frustrated bitches shud bother u
Abeg if ur husby belong to the first category you r on ur own o grin

You are in the second category if he is afraid of you or you have something he is not ready to lose. Either way it is BS, because it is like saying you are not enough, you are just 95% not 100%. You are the emergency woman kept safely and secretly for time when he messess up because he knows you always have his back

SOme glad to be 95% but me I fvcing want o be at the center of the universe if you want the same of me

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by ststyreal(f): 12:29am On Oct 28, 2015
pinceprinz:


Why do men CHEAT?

Cheating is a human disease ok? But well, when it comes to keeping a single sexual partner, maybe the DNA of men shows greater affinity for multiple partners than the female's hence that feeling of being jilted when your species find out HE's fukcking someone else. My take!
Abeg, enough of this husband cheating rubbish and the world clapping in approval of it. For Christ sake, if a man who have vowed before the altar of God and his people to remain faithful to his spouse on their wedding day, now went behind to default in the vow he willingly made before God to his wife, do u think such a man will go unpunished? Huh! You people should stop deceiving your self with a false consolation words like, "man is polygamous in nature or that man is born to cheat or DNA whatever", cos every word spoken must be accounted for, let alone a vow u made before d sanctuary of God' promising to be faithful to your partner. Well, as for me(not my portion though) cos God knows I can't stand a cheating husband, Nitori pe because, my own level of jealousy be like say e pass baba God own. Even though I have told God, that in as much as I remained faithful to my husband, any husband that decides to go unfaithful will always have curses hanged over his life. Enough of this cheating approval, any man who have the intention to cheat on his wife, should make it known to the woman prior to the wedding, if she can cope, fine, if not, she finds her way. Just as any woman marrying a Muslim man should have known the likelihood of the man marrying more wives because of the religion, such scenario is understandable, but not a man, who vowed to be faithful to me before God and his priest and people, now turned back to start cheating on me and u people expect me to swallow it and keep loving him, it is a lie! He will be receiving curses everyday of his life until he desist from such act.

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 12:49am On Oct 28, 2015
ststyreal:

Abeg, enough of this husband cheating rubbish and the world clapping in approval of it. For Christ sake, if a man who have vowed before the altar of God and his people to remain faithful to his spouse on their wedding day, now went behind to default in the vow he willingly made before God to his wife, do u think such a man will go unpunished? Huh! You people should stop deceiving your self with a false consolation words like, "man is polygamous in nature or that man is born to cheat or DNA whatever", cos every word spoken must be accounted for, let alone a vow u made before d sanctuary of God' promising to be faithful to your partner. Well, as for me(not my portion though) cos God knows I can't stand a cheating husband, Nitori pe because, my own level of jealousy be like say e pass baba God own. Even though I have told God, that in as much as I remained faithful to my husband, any husband that decides to go unfaithful will always have curses hanged over his life. Enough of this cheating approval, any man who have the intention to cheat on his wife, should make it known to the woman prior to the wedding, if she can cope, fine, if not, she finds her way. Just as any woman marrying a Muslim man should have known the likelihood of the man marrying more wives because of the religion, such scenario is understandable, but not a man, who vowed to be faithful to me before God and his priest and people, now turned back to start cheating on me and u people expect me to swallow it and keep loving him, it is a lie! He will be receiving curses everyday of his life until he desist from such act.


OH! Ok U win! ! !

The length of ur rizponse is so terrifying I'm currently at loss for words. Chei! Wetin hapun?

3 Likes 1 Share

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by ststyreal(f): 1:11am On Oct 28, 2015
pinceprinz:



OH! Ok U win! ! !

The length of ur rizponse is so terrifying I'm currently at loss for words. Chei! Wetin hapun?
Sorry dear, if I responded harshly. It's just that, this things have a way of infiltrating into weaker mind, which could in turn mould such minds behaviour, hence, now sees cheating as a normal thing. The earlier we call a sin a sin, the better and happier our society and marriages would be.

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 1:51am On Oct 28, 2015
ststyreal:

Sorry dear, if I responded harshly. It's just that, this things have a way of infiltrating into weaker mind, which could in turn mould such minds behaviour, hence, now sees cheating as a normal thing. The earlier we call a sin a sin, the better and happier our society and marriages would be.


Hmmm.... I feel ya


But really, don't you think religion and the doctrines that come with it is fast losing its grip on us minding the placard of 'godlessness' society dances around tirelessly with now?


Don't u feel for peace of mind's sake, one's jez gotta lego af some seemingly unrelinquishable oddities or better still injustice thrown at us so, we don't increase our already too numerous encumberances by a factor of one?


I mean, you can choose to be happy even under depression. You can choose to be strong while getting battered and bruised, Nigerian youths who despite the tough economy where the youths are serially tortured by the state who wouldn't just give 'em nothing near enough to survive whilst still thrive and keeps the smiling face alive and an enchanting wit to match is my witness. Now, don't get me wrong! If your huzby gets unnecessarily abusive scolding u physically and emotionally you sure have to or must withdraw from the nuptial ties but when He's still caring and all loving but maybe by error gives in to that temptation of getting into a SECRET affair with another, then, I'm of that opinion he hasn't done a handful of the crime enough to be sentenced to outright condemnation and absolute punishment. He could even grow worse rather than sober if care is not taken. He's a grown up man, not a kid u can correct with torture. Rather, feed him with the fruit of leniency, overwhelm him with your love and show him more reason to love you harder and better. So, he gets that message you're the One for me and I'm with you for better for worse. . . My take!

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by naijaboiy: 1:56am On Oct 28, 2015
A man must cheat. I've come to realise and slowly accept that fact. sad

Take it or leave it. grin

2 Likes

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by naijaboiy: 2:00am On Oct 28, 2015
ststyreal:

Abeg, enough of this husband cheating rubbish and the world clapping in approval of it. For Christ sake, if a man who have vowed before the altar of God and his people to remain faithful to his spouse on their wedding day, now went behind to default in the vow he willingly made before God to his wife, do u think such a man will go unpunished? Huh! You people should stop deceiving your self with a false consolation words like, "man is polygamous in nature or that man is born to cheat or DNA whatever", cos every word spoken must be accounted for, let alone a vow u made before d sanctuary of God' promising to be faithful to your partner. Well, as for me(not my portion though) cos God knows I can't stand a cheating husband, Nitori pe because, my own level of jealousy be like say e pass baba God own. Even though I have told God, that in as much as I remained faithful to my husband, any husband that decides to go unfaithful will always have curses hanged over his life. Enough of this cheating approval, any man who have the intention to cheat on his wife, should make it known to the woman prior to the wedding, if she can cope, fine, if not, she finds her way. Just as any woman marrying a Muslim man should have known the likelihood of the man marrying more wives because of the religion, such scenario is understandable, but not a man, who vowed to be faithful to me before God and his priest and people, now turned back to start cheating on me and u people expect me to swallow it and keep loving him, it is a lie! He will be receiving curses everyday of his life until he desist from such act.
All these Long story won't change anything at all. I've realised that it's mostly single women that complain and talk like this.

They shout about the things they will do and what they won't when they get married. You think everything is straight like a ruler as you've planned?

Get married first madam and let's see your view after 10 years of marriage. smiley

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Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by naijaboiy: 2:04am On Oct 28, 2015
classicB:

Cheating in my opinion can be categorised. There are some married men that cheat on their wives and make her understand that they actually have a mistress, these kind of men deny their wives her conjugal right, they deprive her of emotional attention and some other things. I can say men that belongs here do not love their wives. Meanwhile there are some married men that only "sleep outside" they do all they can to prevent their wives from knowing, these kind of people respect their wives enough, they dnt deny her of her right neither do they punish her emotionally.
Lemme tell about our driver, this man loves his wife so much that he is the one that buys her underwear shocked cater for all her needs and so on, yet this man has a mistress, he belongs to the second category
I dnt know why men cheat anyway.
But a man that loves u belongs with u no matter how many ladies he straffs per day cry youre his lover, his wife, the mother of his kids, i dnt know why some frustrated bitches shud bother u
Abeg if ur husby belong to the first category you r on ur own o grin
You've spoken very well classicB. But I bet you many women will not agree with you when this thread reaches front page. grin

They'll insult and curse you sef grin

They see the truth staring at them but they want to fight it. Well don't be bothered by their anger and frustration,they're just bitter. grin

5 Likes

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 6:57am On Oct 28, 2015
naijaboiy:

You've spoken very well classicB. But I bet you many women will not agree with you when this thread reaches front page. grin

They'll insult and curse you sef grin

They see the truth staring at them but they want to fight it. Well don't be bothered by their anger and frustration,they're just bitter. grin
cheesy
Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by bronzegoddess(f): 9:47am On Oct 28, 2015
classicB:
"What some married women dnt understand is, that their husband is having sex with other ladies out there doesnt make them less of a wife, lover, mother..., a man can actually love u and still have sex outside. This is because a real man have sex with his d!ck and not his emotions, meanline a woman having sex outside her marriage is slowly destroying it because most times women have sex not only with their vagina but also with their emotion grin that is why a cheating husband will not allow his wife cheat bck." As said by a married level mate.

Seriously...women have sex with emotions Incredible!

5 Likes

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Nobody: 1:32pm On Oct 28, 2015
bronzegoddess:


Seriously...women have sex with emotions Incredible!
We cannot both deny that.
Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Raalsalghul: 1:47pm On Oct 28, 2015
Toks2008 should officially be crowned the "Love, Sex, Relationship and Marriage Consultant on Nairaland". His threads are always mature, insightful and practical if one cares to apply it. Though I feel many "Feminists" will come on this thread to dispute some of the points he made above especially the one on "Cheating". One is already doing that.

1 Like

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Missonas(f): 3:14pm On Oct 28, 2015
Yes no one will tel u cos these things may or may not happen.We all pray for better days ahead.You go into marriages without a clue of what it'll bring what matters most is how we deal. Learning tips and pointers may come in handy bt mehn one is never fully kitted. Prepare for anythg and always make u happy, no one else will!

1 Like

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Adaeze003(f): 3:31pm On Oct 28, 2015
Another thread for the nl boys to "blow breeze"...

3 Likes

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by ststyreal(f): 3:39pm On Oct 28, 2015
naijaboiy:

All these Long story won't change anything at all. I've realised that it's mostly single women that complain and talk like this.

They shout about the things they will do and what they won't when they get married. You think everything is straight like a ruler as you've planned?

Get married first madam and let's see your view after 10 years of marriage. smiley

Hahaha, I can only but laugh at your ignorance of my status

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: 13 Facts you must know Before You Say I Do To That Man. by Toks2008(m): 6:12pm On Oct 28, 2015
Raalsalghul:
Toks2008 should officially be crowned the "Love, Sex, Relationship and Marriage Consultant on Nairaland". His threads are always mature, insightful and practical if one cares to apply it. Though I feel many "Feminists" will come on this thread to dispute some of the points he made above especially the one on "Cheating". One is already doing that.


LOL! my brother how i for do?

Writing is one crazy passion i have and since i do my business majorly online,it gives me ample opportunity at my free time to share some hard facts with nairalanders.

Yes i do not expect a standing ovation for what i write here and some may see it as outright boring and annoying but thank GOD for freedom of expression and as human i am obliged to do what i love doing without fear of reproach especially when it does not directly attack or bring down anyone. I am writing this to clear the air and let those who just find fault and generate undue anger and bitterness towards what another peson do innocently to make him or herself happy to take a chill pill.

Now concerning the issue of my no holds bar write-ups regarding relationships,i believe those who are of matured age and the married will understand better and the young ladies especially those who still have their adrenaline running wild might just relate to these write ups if they ever come face to face with the hard reality as regards what i write.

Not all men cheat and it will take a man with great discipline,the holy spirit and fear as well as love for GOD not to cheat on her girlfriend or wife but does this change the fact that most men cheat?

So my philosophy of life is to be pragmatic in an objective manner and i would rather prefer to tell you the truth and make you cry rather than lie to you and see you wear a foolish smile.

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