epelumi42:
Well, We've been together since last year and I'm aware that her parents are based in US. She told me she was preparing for something big and said she wanted to make it a surprise. Two days to her leaving, she told me she won't be available for two days. Her cell will be off, and that I shouldn't worry. Well, since I travelled, I had no chance to check or do anything. After the two days break, she just called to tell me she had landed safely and I was like, where? Story short. She said she was scared of telling me because I'd be disappointed and that it was gonna affect me.
.
Well, she went to do her masters program and she won't be coming back till the end of the year because she already told me she doesn't wanna settle down in the US. Dunno what to do. I've been so pissed with her.
.

Dat girl hate u... Simple

stolid:


Ofcourse she'll apologize. She'll beg for forgiveness so she doesn't come off as being utterly inhumane, and laying waste of the relationship without battling an eye lid. She'll make excuses for not letting you in on her plans, and make endless promises assuring you that she'll stay committed to the relationship.

But you see, my good man, what she has done is an act of selfishness. And you know, true love isn't selfish. True love is sacrificial; true love is UNDERSTANDING. That lady doesn't love you as much. For now, you're a mere back up plan. That's my surmisal, in all honesty.

If she sees someone better in the U.S, she'll let go off your gentle ass without breaking a sweat. However, chances are she won't. On the average, I think it's somewhat difficult for Nigerian ladies compared to the men over there (story for another day.)

What am I saying in essence? Just play along, and see how it all turns out. It's easy for gentle guys like yourself to get played by these ladies, but in due time, you'll get the right woman for you. Let all that anger go, play along, but please be indifferent about the relationship. Develop yourself like MAD and keep your emotions in check.

I beg to disagree with you

u hav ntin 2 wory about strugle continue

OLUJOSHINS:







Sista, how on earth is this possible?

Lolz guys, I know you don't need it but I posted the link in case a female needs it. You know a lot of females will check this thread of.

dollyjoy:
money dey cum wit consequences sha

pls tell her....she tinks d only tin dey do wit money is to spend it......more tinz to cum afterwards

yours is even better, Wen I was in school my supposed girlfriend travelled without telling me at all. it was during obasanjo 4months strike. I didn't see her return to school after strike was over only for me to hear from her friend that she travelled to Canada.

Wendyslim:
Maybe ur not man enuf and she found someone better. Hard luck guy

When will you ever make sense in any of your posts?

Lol

I can't judge yet.

My question is: why Did u bring this story here? Do u need advice or sympathy?

Yes, you sure do have a lot to do, tell God to give you the grace to bear the pain, then move with your life. There are girls out there, get yourself another girlfriend and don't wait for her to use you as plan b.

klassic:
@OP, truth is and remains the simple fact that she loves you dearly and sincerely. Just like you are in a confused state right about now, so she felt since she knew she was gonna leave you for a while. She didn't know how to tell you, without breaking your heart, you dissuading her or making her feel bad too. This was in no way easy for her.
Think it this way, if she wanted to break up the relationship, she will simply disappear and you won't hear from her ever again. She didn't do that which show she still cares about you. You have every right to be angry and saddened, but be matured about it.

bro, she messed up big time not what you are writing.. No matter what, love is about communication and understanding, she broke that rule to communicate with her bf. To me, I do not see the girl comin back home if the guy wrote that her family are based in the US. As long as her family are there, she would remain there.

prisiluv:
My question is: why Did u bring this story here? Do u need advice or sympathy?

I will still have to make a decision over her. Question is, what will most people do if found in my shoes. I don't need sympathy.

Do you want to hear the truth, OP? Someone who truly loves you, wont travel out to start school without your knowledge! With all the planning and stress it takes to apply for admission, student visa, book flights etc. for her to keep all that processing a secret till her landing in the US, that girl must either be deceitful or just does not love you enough. U need to be a man and right things if u want her to love and respect u again. U need to tell. and show her in no uncertain terms that keeping things of that magnitude a secret is not acceptable in a genuine relationship. That is if u still want to maintain the relationship. If u just accept what she did, she will lose any remaining respect she had for u and u will still lose the relationship.

meforyou1:
girls and their bad advices. Keep in touch with her for what?
Op, don't try and contact her again ever. If she calls and u pick and find out it's her, cut the call immediately. If she sends you any type of message through any medium, delete it immediately without reading. If she sends you any document through post or ups or dhl or so, set it on fire without opening it.
Those girls are just so wicked and so mean. Make you feel guilty all the time for nothing.

imagine the kind advice that yeye girl dey give,.. Well, you nailed it with your comments, these gals got heart and they aint loyal @all. As for the guy,he is foolish for thinking the girl gives a freaking damn about him. These gurls self,their heart wicked pass satan.

Oh boy, leave story, that babe is a goner. Move on with your life.

Bro no worry she is here witrh me and in safe hands

epelumi42:
Well, We've been together since last year and I'm aware that her parents are based in US. She told me she was preparing for something big and said she wanted to make it a surprise. Two days to her leaving, she told me she won't be available for two days. Her cell will be off, and that I shouldn't worry. Well, since I travelled, I had no chance to check or do anything. After the two days break, she just called to tell me she had landed safely and I was like, where? Story short. She said she was scared of telling me because I'd be disappointed and that it was gonna affect me.
.
Well, she went to do her masters program and she won't be coming back till the end of the year because she already told me she doesn't wanna settle down in the US. Dunno what to do. I've been so pissed with her.
.

epelumi42:


I will still have to make a decision over her. Question is, what will most people do if found in my shoes. I don't need sympathy.

Truth is....you cant use what other people will do,to make your decision.i'm sure you can see that already from the conflicting and annoying things people have been saying..this is your lady,you know her better,you know how she feels about you and how strong and sound your relationship is.you just need time to process everything,eventually you'll come to a conclusion on your own. I understand how you feel...

rittyben:
I plan on doing same to my guy. He will understand though

i should start minding you abi

Chaioo heartbreaking saga awon girls to take over.

Well, she was right. it turned out to really be a surprise. Mr man, Im afraid you may have assumed you were in a relationship.

Guy jst play kul but deep inside u kn... the one that love you will cherish the last moment #justsaying

The babe don "PORT" to another network

She is not ur girl friend but a se. X mate if she can hide something like this from u, u don't worth anything in her sight free her and move on with ur life she don't worth the stress plsssszzzz.

Okay OP so what's all these? As if there are no pressing issues to be dealt with, yeah?

See, every relationship is defined from the get go like it or not, save you were in denial and refused to recognise the tell tale signs that must have been staring u rudely in the face.

How do you explain a girl you apparently claim to have had stuff with suddenly travelled out the country and you knew nada about it? Excuse me, do u expect us to take u any more seriously as the lady in question??

Fact is you were either over your head or blind to some salient facts. You are angry n mad at her and she's been calling and begging, bullocks...

You were probably deceiving each other as your agenda were clearly in opposite directions. You were even reprimanding someone for questioning your genuine love stance, my guy, I'm sorry but unlike the male folk, women are plain and simple and could be read by anyone paying close attention especially when they're in love, and man is it really, totally, frigging obvious, she could do anything, go to any length, you would think it's some potion working. If that girl was really into you, like reallyyyyyy then trust me this shoddy post of yours at attempting to curry sympathy and solidarity from your male folks wouldn't have seen today's light!!!

Word of advice: learn to pay attention clearly next time(cos that bae is so gone) when you find someone else and be sure your dreams and aspirations are in sync with mutual understanding.

Good luck to you!!!

You are the side guy!

Maybe when she try to date couple of guys in the STaTe and they are not ready for marriage

She will come back to u , hopefully you will be single then

dazzle101:
Okay OP so what's all these? As if there are no pressing issues to be dealt with, yeah?

See, every relationship is defined from the get go like it or not, save you were in denial and refused to recognise the tell tale signs that must have been staring u rudely in the face.

How do you explain a girl you apparently claim to have had stuff with suddenly travelled out the country and you knew nada about it? Excuse me, do u expect us to take u any more seriously as the lady in question??

Fact is you were either over your head or blind to some salient facts. You are angry n mad at her and she's been calling and begging, bullocks...

You were probably deceiving each other as your agenda were clearly in opposite directions. You were even reprimanding someone for questioning your genuine love stance, my guy, I'm sorry but unlike the male folk, women are plain and simple and could be read by anyone paying close attention especially when they're in love, and man is it really, totally, frigging obvious, she could do anything, go to any length, you would think it's some potion working. If that girl was really into you, like reallyyyyyy then trust me this shoddy post of yours at attempting to curry sympathy and solidarity from your male folks wouldn't have seen today's light!!!

Word of advice: learn to pay attention clearly next time(cos that bae is so gone) when you find someone else and be sure your dreams and aspirations are in sync with mutual understanding.

Good luck to you!!!

Stay blessed love your sense of humor ......

your girlfriend is zinny, i was on same plane with her. Brotherly, na here u carry the matter come? Just relax and face your life cus she is facing hers. you can come and join her if you care..greetings from Texas.

epelumi42:
Well, We've been together since last year and I'm aware that her parents are based in US. She told me she was preparing for something big and said she wanted to make it a surprise. Two days to her leaving, she told me she won't be available for two days. Her cell will be off, and that I shouldn't worry. Well, since I travelled, I had no chance to check or do anything. After the two days break, she just called to tell me she had landed safely and I was like, where? Story short. She said she was scared of telling me because I'd be disappointed and that it was gonna affect me.
.
Well, she went to do her masters program and she won't be coming back till the end of the year because she already told me she doesn't wanna settle down in the US. Dunno what to do. I've been so pissed with her.
.

@Op, I tnk prisiluv z ryt. its a personal tin. if ure 2 follow w@ dz NL's are sayn, u will end up crashn ur own relationship. I bliv she will kum bck...... criozly she will

pinkycute:
Your last statement looks childish @Op nobody is gargling her with you

And I guess, you just came here to show yourself, Or to tell us that, your girlfriend who loves you so much now lives in USA. Well that's your headache not mine go and bring her back, since she didn't tell you.

epelumi42:


Is falling love that easy for you? Come on. Just mind your speech. You may not have had luck with the good girls but I have. This lady knew what was gonna happen if she told me. I want to believe she did it in the best interest. I'm just pissed and I ruined her surprise.

*modified; Trusting people is a problem here. I just didn't wanna lose her. So I assumed all the possibilities. She apologized and kinda assured me. Maybe I'll be indifferent. if she comes back to me, then so be it. Because I don't think I'm eager to fall in love again. Nairalanders can be funny tho.

@Op I understand how you feel...
If you guys are definitely meant to be, she'll surely return for you. Do not worry your head so much about it....
we have a lot of childish people on this forum, who just open their mouth at the slightest opportunity to vomit rubbish.
I usually don't advice people to bring up their matter here, because you might end up getting pissed. Nairaland is now something else.

all the same take heart....

dazzle101:
I'm sorry but unlike the male folk, women are plain and simple and could be read by anyone paying close attention.

Have you ever thought of being a stand-up comic?