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Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help (40800 Views)
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Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by gbemi514: 7:31pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Twaci:you must be the daughter of King Solomon....... #wisewoman 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by sibdiibrahim(m): 7:46pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
If your mum is alive, whenever your mother-in law is coming, invite her also. If she isn't alive, then your aunt or 'elderly' sister (junior or senior). And ehen...... Do not forget to deliberately refuse to buy goodies that you are used to buying whenever she comes. Let the house be dry. When you go out, comeback late. Don't go and drink or chase ashawo ooooo. One more thing, try cuddling your wife in her presence...... 2 Likes |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by pacretus(m): 7:46pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Twaci:hehehe..na dis kind gial dey good for marriage..abeg vacancy still dey.[s s s] |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Nathkem01(m): 7:50pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11:lol That means u don marry her nd ur wife 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Prettiepearlz(f): 7:50pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
luvablesam:Dear uncle I got your point, the only issue I have with you was your earlier comment about a man owning the house because he paid, bought or rented the house so his wife has no right to stop his mum from visiting everyday. But you have actually made a point that isn't biased with this now, so you're free 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by maasoap(m): 7:56pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11:No, you are not. When you are really fed up, you will come back here to tell us how you have dealt with it. 4 Likes |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Nobody: 7:56pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Op ure a joker, and u also sound like a mummy's boy. How the hell. Please be a man and take charge. Everything remains constant until a force is applied. 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by arestechnology: 8:12pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
my friend u are the man perhaps its ur house not hers u decied what be and should not take charge.and speak ur mind |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by NkayTiana(f): 8:16pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Sit the mum down and talk to her... if possible a visiting time table cos that woman will ruin ur marriage as she ruined hers... if u love your home please don't talk to your wife, talk to the mum... you are a man,you can do it 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Prechy08(m): 8:17pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
For you take the boldest step to spill here is encouraging next one is take that step at home forget the introvert thing, you are watching her destroy your home as she did her's, why will she be leaving alone. That aside. If i were in your shoes wake your wife up in the middle of the night, take her to the sitting room and with all authority tell her this needs to stop, you have parents too. And that you are respecting her by giving her this chance/opportunity to tell her mum you guys needs space and if she doesnt do it in a weeks time, you will tell her mum ur self and it got to stop. For this to work, u must be dead serious with the warning |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by neocortex: 8:35pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
NkayTiana: How did you know that ? Are you a member of their family ? 4 Likes |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Wizzyblack3(m): 8:40pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
eyinjuege:Nawa o,,,, just when i thought this would help, this guy just come in to rub more aboniki for OP wound. But if that should be the case, his wife might be the first to dislike what her mom is doing and in d process send her away. Btw, OP should try taking a break from coming home and inform his wife he won't come home until he start having some privacy in his house. Abi wuch kind end time MIL be dis. 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by armadeo(m): 8:43pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Firstly all that relocate or get a smaller pad is bullshit. Dude create your own world for yourself in the house. 1. Move your decoder to your room. 2. Eat out always . 3. When you get back from work, greet them gist a bit and retire to your cocoon. By the time she realises you haven't eaten her food for 2 days nobody would reset get faculty. Believe you me if your wife doesn't sit up fast then be set to get out of the marriage. 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by bitingcool: 8:55pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11: Walk around naked or semi nude every night and start making love to your wife in the sitting room and kitchen. Or remove the bed in the extra rooms. Give it out. No mattress sef. And put a treadmill there so wrapper can't be put on the floor. That is a crystal clear message. As long as your home is comfortable for her, she will never leave 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Nobody: 8:56pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
omo dem don hijack baba family o. mehn stay away from girls that feed their mum about anything that happens in their life every second. this is usually the outcome. 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by UmmKhalifah(f): 9:02pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11:dis can b so annoyin ehn?yu av to start spendin weekends wif ur family outside ur home |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by UmmKhalifah(f): 9:13pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11:nonsense... ma husband does dat too,probably cos s d only son , they wil b watchin TV in d sittn lvin all alone in d bedroom but wif tym he got tired of his mum... sha b patient wif her |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by ERCROSS(m): 9:13pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11: Bros, the only solution is what has been said by TWACI. explain the issue to ur parents and beg them to help u set things right... Invite your mum over and ask her to come with like 2 or 3 female cousins of urs... I swear , she go change 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Josmila(m): 9:38pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
My mother in-law hardly visits except my wife invites her, she understands we need our privacy such that even when she visits, she leaves after a few days. Your wife is the key to solving the problem at hand, have a word a her and make her see reasons to speak to her mum about the incessant visits and long stays. If you try to do it yourself, she'll develop some hatred for you, and you know the end product . Agree with your wife and let her the job so you can have your home back and not lose your sanity. Peace! |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by luvablesam(m): 10:09pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Prettiepearlz: Dear Aunty. You have not been released. You have not given the OP a conclusive opinion as to how he can tell mama to reduce her visits
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Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by tonio2wo: 10:24pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11: Did she and her family sponsor ur wedding? Or was the business u n ur wife run funded by her family? 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Nobody: 10:24pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
soberdrunk:This guy your so crazy chai! You must have watched too many cartoons and kiddies movies while growing up! Or maybe you are a kid? Kids have infiltrated Nairaland anyways! Still......that number 3 is epicly hilarious! |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Prettiepearlz(f): 10:27pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
luvablesam:Dear Uncle, it's now obvious you didn't completely read my first post, you only read the first paragragh. I already gave him my piece of advice on how to be free. You can do well to go back to completely read my first comment on this thread. 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by mikolo80: 11:02pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
dynamite11:man up and ask your wife to choose you or her mother or leave the house whenever she's around, or play very very loud music or sports (take back your remote man) or mojo sef. anybody not comfortable should leave. beht rid will come in handy when chudrens start coming o. so decide 1 Like 1 Share |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by tony1305: 11:14pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
My dear brother,I understand where you're coming from. Been there and it wasn't easy. Its is even more difficult when the wife fails to understand the need for privacy. What I did in my own case,after my continuous calls for my wife to stop her mother visiting frequently failed. I had to allow it spill into a quarrel that caught the attention of my MI. Ot was obvious to everyone that we(my wife and I had issues)so when my MI asked her daughter what the issue was,she had no choice but to spill the beans. Her mother got the jerk and left. From that day she respected herself. Of course I settled with my wife. Though she wasn't down with it bit she didn't have a choice. Cos the quarrel we had was intense and she wasn't ready for another. So my brother make up your mind to deal with this issue even if it means quarrel so be it. Let your wife know that you're no longer going to tolerate it. Let it be obvious to her mum. If she hates you for it no wahala its always better to be yourself in your house than to pretend all is well. Best of luck. 2 Likes |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by tony1305: 11:24pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
It's really unfortunate that some couples fail to realise that marriage works better when there are no third parties. Third parties includes parents who wont mind their own lives but rather choose to poke into their children's marriage. No matter how close you or your wife use to be with your parents. It ended the day you exchanged vows. Your wife must know that you both deserve to respect each other. That includes feelings and in this case relationship with your parents. If she wants to respect her mum that's fine but it should not be at the detriment of her own home. I wish you luck men. Its not easy. I pray you succeed. 1 Like |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by mikolo80: 11:41pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Tellemall:can't have two captains |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by mikolo80: 11:43pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
Prettiepearlz:make gander de look face. na in marriage e de play with. which kin mumu mother wan scatter him pikin marriage |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by mikolo80: 11:44pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
sibdiibrahim:In fact if na me i go go all the way. she can watch if he's mine carry am |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Teeboy22(m): 11:55pm On Aug 11, 2016 |
locosis007: U don too watch English film |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by baarak66(m): 12:02am On Aug 12, 2016 |
robosky02: Just relocate far away from her. Or perhaps leave the town you are if possible. |
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by 9icetoo(m): 12:02am On Aug 12, 2016 |
soberdrunk:
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