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My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help - Family (2) - Nairaland

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Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by veekid(m): 2:03pm On Aug 11, 2016
Find hera job, she's jobless

1 Like

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Iolite(f): 2:05pm On Aug 11, 2016
Twaci:
Simple.....

Invite your mom over cheesy

PERFECTO wink

1 Like

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by itoese(m): 2:05pm On Aug 11, 2016
Let your wife know how you feel. Though she may not like it at first. But take it calmly and coolly with her.
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Nobody: 2:06pm On Aug 11, 2016
dynamite11:
My problem started shortly after our wedding this year, and ever since its like I'm in a versus kind of relationship( I versus my wife and her family). She is so controlling, she knows all of our business my wife makes sure she keeps her up to date on every little details that goes on in our lives and she is never out of our lives not even for a week and I think my wife is ok with it because her mother can never be wrong.

She worships her either she is right or wrong, she is always visiting every weekend and sometimes stays with us for a week or two only to come back the following weekend saying she misses us, when I got married to my wife I didn't ask for a bonus, I don't know why we can't be left alone, and the worse part of it is that she comes with other family members and we always have a full house, I'm an introvert and I love my privacy but with my mother in-law I will never have that. I have become sad over the past few months and it's affecting my home because I can't even talk to my wife anymore because she is her mother's ear piece, I'm losing my sanity, she is coming over this weekend and I think I just need to go on a vacation alone this summer to clear my head. Have you ever had this kind of problem before? I need help please.
You have to speak out like a man. I'm sure ur mother in law has her own family to take care of. You should discuss it with your wife though but in a polite manner. Ladies can be touchy when it comes to their mother not visiting. You can invite your parent too. Two can play that game.
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by elfakkawy(m): 2:07pm On Aug 11, 2016
Hi Mā-inlaw, I need some privacy
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by lative(m): 2:07pm On Aug 11, 2016
relocate to a far far city n check if she can keep up with d cost of transport,or when dy jst come leave the ous to them n go chill wit ur niqqos or maybe u should jst talk to ur wife in a calm way Mr. op ur last option is to feel free with them n become a member of their family

3 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by soccerdrum(m): 2:09pm On Aug 11, 2016
@OP, ur name nna Dynamite, abi? Just EXPLODE for ur mother-in-law nah! As simple as that wink

2 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by slye(m): 2:10pm On Aug 11, 2016
Simply rent a one bedroom apartment

9 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by linusbnn(m): 2:11pm On Aug 11, 2016
soberdrunk:
My brother you have three options::::::

1) You can man up and tell your wife and her mother that you are not comfortable with the way things are and that you need your privacy.(this option is not easy because you will have to face the 'wrath' of your wife or her mother or 'both')

2) You can get a male elder in your wife's family that is 'understanding' to talk to your mother-in-law to respect you and your wife's privacy(this too is risky because it can backfire if ypur mother-in-law takes it the wrong way)

3) 'OPERATION FLUSH HER OUT"--- make your home very 'uncomfortable' for her! Old women are superstitious so you can take advantage of that, you can start by dropping strange objects in the room she sleeps whenever she visits, you can arrange for strange noises to be made close to her window in the middle of the night, if your wife travels you can even go hardcore Nollywood on her, like pretend you are carrying out strange rituals in the middle of the night or just wear all white and be dancing azonto at odd hours and make sure she sees you grin grin grin grin

GOODLUCK MAN! DONT FORGET TO COME BACK AND THANK ME WITH COLD BOTTLES OF GULDER grin grin grin


Number 3 is so so so funny die.
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by hefelove(m): 2:12pm On Aug 11, 2016
Let the gateman handle it. Thank me later

4 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Sochimaobim(m): 2:12pm On Aug 11, 2016
Whenever she plans to visit, call her and tell her not to bother coming, that u will send her daughter over to stay with her. Make sure ur wife goes over to her house to stay with her. Let ur wife understand that u are sending her to her mum not becos u want to, but because she is forcing ur hand.
They will use their tongue to count their teeth

17 Likes 2 Shares

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by ibroh22(m): 2:13pm On Aug 11, 2016
hmmmm,here to read comments
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Adedoks(m): 2:13pm On Aug 11, 2016
Oga me am married and I understand you to some extent.. Ur marriage is too young for all dis drama. Its your wife dat needs to be talked to. I don't think she understands what marriage is. Dis is ow women start pushing men to misbehave. By the time the man becomes comfortable staying outside than home her eye will clear. My wife's mum do come around too once in a while and the reason I tolerate it is cos she is a widow. I love her cos she doesn't over do it. Wanna ask is your wife the only child she has? Why all dis attachment. God help you oo

3 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by AlphaCentauri: 2:13pm On Aug 11, 2016
bro, you married mummys pet. deal with it lol.

2 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Codes151(m): 2:14pm On Aug 11, 2016
Them dem cook give am with too much pepper! Always. Add more to her food! She will leave. OR
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Badgers14: 2:15pm On Aug 11, 2016
Twaci:
Simple.....

Invite your mom over cheesy

You bad ooooo... grin

Take one bottle for my head nau kiss

1 Like

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by czaratwork: 2:15pm On Aug 11, 2016
Your wife wants to join her mother's club. SINGLE MOTHER IN THE MAKING, OR THE MAKING OF A SINGLE MOTHER.

7 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Eibams60(m): 2:16pm On Aug 11, 2016
Am nt sure u r the man in dat house, u sound childish to me man. Abi na ur wife give u work. Nonsense

1 Like

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Pidggin(f): 2:17pm On Aug 11, 2016
Yieldings:
You're the man of the house/your house and have every right to your privacy. That includes who comes visiting, when and how often. It's time to speak up. Your MIL shouldn't be in your home controlling you either, that's ridiculous. If this problem started shortly after you got married this year, then you and your wife have not had the chance to enjoy yourselves nor your home as newlyweds, which is especially not fair to you (since your wife isn't bothered). She stays for a week or two then returns the following weekend, smh. Since your wife is siding with her mom, give her an ultimatum: either her mother stops visiting {so often} or you send her back home to her. If she misses her daughter so much, then her daughter will be coming home where she can be seeing her everyday.

Nawa, would you advice a woman like this if the situation was the other way around?

"Leave your husband's house because his mum visits alot"

All to get likes wink

16 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by idu1(m): 2:17pm On Aug 11, 2016
cheesy

2 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Elmojiid(m): 2:18pm On Aug 11, 2016
i am once in your shoe brother it is hard for me also, i can feel your pain all you need is patient and mind your speech becos wat u said might be use against you so becarefull and always pray to GOD to give the strenght to carry on that is your own cross you have to carry it, i pray that GOD will see you tru.

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Anijay1212(m): 2:19pm On Aug 11, 2016
soberdrunk:
My brother you have three options::::::

1) You can man up and tell your wife and her mother that you are not comfortable with the way things are and that you need your privacy.(this option is not easy because you will have to face the 'wrath' of your wife or her mother or 'both')

2) You can get a male elder in your wife's family that is 'understanding' to talk to your mother-in-law to respect you and your wife's privacy(this too is risky because it can backfire if ypur mother-in-law takes it the wrong way)

3) 'OPERATION FLUSH HER OUT"--- make your home very 'uncomfortable' for her! Old women are superstitious so you can take advantage of that, you can start by dropping strange objects in the room she sleeps whenever she visits, you can arrange for strange noises to be made close to her window in the middle of the night, if your wife travels you can even go hardcore Nollywood on her, like pretend you are carrying out strange rituals in the middle of the night or just wear all white and be dancing azonto at odd hours and make sure she sees you grin grin grin grin

GOODLUCK MAN! DONT FORGET TO COME BACK AND THANK ME WITH COLD BOTTLES OF GULDER grin grin grin
Hahahahahaha....
This guy no well o...
Op take the third option and pls dont tell us the outcome mbok.
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by holluwai(m): 2:20pm On Aug 11, 2016
Men all these MIL no dey mind their business. I go soon divorce my wife now if her mama no gree sir for her house. Rubbish!!#!!!

1 Like

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by damola1: 2:20pm On Aug 11, 2016
Why you keep talking?

Just leave the house. It'll be hard at first, but it's the only option after you have exhausted all talking options. Just leave.

2 Likes

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by fexyrich(m): 2:20pm On Aug 11, 2016
Leave the house for them for 2 weeks...if ur wife starts to miss u tell her that she shld choose between u and her mothers frequent visits..Get a house help to stay with her mother and keep her company in her own house so that she can give u guys some space...Travel, leave the house for them..ur wife will come looking for you..If it were me I will start making my wife jealous by acting as though I av other female girlfriends and I wld start coming back very late and sleeping out somtimes.if she starts complaining tell her that since she cant give u DAT companionship by allowing u av ur privacy with her then u av to get it else were...my man she will be d one to do d needful,cos am sure she wldnt want to loose u..

22 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by jackie35(m): 2:21pm On Aug 11, 2016
dynamite11:
My problem started shortly after our wedding this year, and ever since its like I'm in a versus kind of relationship( I versus my wife and her family). She is so controlling, she knows all of our business my wife makes sure she keeps her up to date on every little details that goes on in our lives and she is never out of our lives not even for a week and I think my wife is ok with it because her mother can never be wrong.

She worships her either she is right or wrong, she is always visiting every weekend and sometimes stays with us for a week or two only to come back the following weekend saying she misses us, when I got married to my wife I didn't ask for a bonus, I don't know why we can't be left alone, and the worse part of it is that she comes with other family members and we always have a full house, I'm an introvert and I love my privacy but with my mother in-law I will never have that. I have become sad over the past few months and it's affecting my home because I can't even talk to my wife anymore because she is her mother's ear piece, I'm losing my sanity, she is coming over this weekend and I think I just need to go on a vacation alone this summer to clear my head. Have you ever had this kind of problem before? I need help please.


I hope she or her daughter is reading this right up ............ bet you, she will change from now onward.
Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Emmatdayo(m): 2:23pm On Aug 11, 2016
Twaci:
Simple.....

Invite your mom over cheesy
perfect solution

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by yetseyi(f): 2:24pm On Aug 11, 2016
Pheww thank God its a man that is complaining this time around not a woman.

When wives come around to complain of similar matters the replies the men give is always is the line of you don't like your mother In law, what do you mean by she should give you space, women are their own enemies etc.

The comments from the males here are quite interesting to read. Did I just see an operation flush her out from a male Looool oooo grin grin
Hope you can allow your wife to flush your mother out if she's like the Op's MIL.

grin grin

19 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Nobody: 2:25pm On Aug 11, 2016
My advice is WATCH & PRAY. Watch means be vigilant and pray means there is nothing you can do except prayers. I can tell u that for that kind of situation to have happened, maybe your wife is the only daughter or the last child. Moreso, it's either your mother-inlaw is a widow or a divorcee. To the bachelors shine your eyes well ooooo

1 Like

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Emmatdayo(m): 2:27pm On Aug 11, 2016
Prettiepearlz:
At last all powerful master, at least this complain is coming from a man and not a woman. I am surprised at the comments coming from our men, they aren't insulting him but if it's from a woman, this thread would have been filled with insults, now you can see that what's good for the goose is also good for the gander. Nobody wants his or her privacy being invaded. I just hope you guys here will comment this way if it's from a lady, but NO! It's a selfish world! A woman has to bear the pain.

@dynamite11, you know to achieve your aim, you might end up turning into a bad guy but for someone like me, I don't care. Since your wife isn't doing anything tangible about it, you have to put your foot down, you have to face her. Let her know that her presence is bugging you, you need your privacy, you need time to bond with your family and she isn't giving you that with her everyday and unnecessary visits. But if you can't do it, then you have to live with it.

Ps: Ikupakuti, come and see a guy complaining, let's see what you have to say about this now.

Re: My Mother-In-law Visits Too Often, How Do I Deal With That? Please Help by Nobody: 2:27pm On Aug 11, 2016
Pidggin:


Nawa, would you advice a woman like this if the situation was the other way around?

"Leave your husband's house because his mum visits alot"

All to get likes wink
lol. I was being sarcastic. It's just to wake her up. smiley

2 Likes

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