eeby1983:
this person said it all, your wife is in love with you and she wanted to make you jealous that was why she said all those bad things to you, only that she lack some manners of approach maybe because of her age. Bro just try and wake her up tonight talk sense into her and make good love too, but pls stop those stupid yanch look wey u dey do and concentrate on your wife

Ode!!! You are the most foolish sissy boy on earth.

Do you even know what love is all about?

If a woman loves you, reporting you to ex or chatting with ex ll be the last thing on her mind. Women are naturally emotional and when they are in love, d emotion takes over their senses.

If a lady is in love with you, she ll be mindful of her words towards you. Only a lady without feelings would say such stupid thing.

Women are quite cunning, sharing those stories with him about her ex doesn't mean she is not sleeping with the ex. It could be any reason...

Women are fucking smart when it comes to cheating. A devoted housewife ll cheat for years and nobody ll even suspect but as soon as you start as a man, d same week, she ll know. Women usually know cos that's their area of specialisation

djeezy:
Nice advice but still contacting her ex is a very wrong move. Whether close friend or not. It's not wise to discuss your marital issues with an ex. Secondly there maybe surrounding circumstances which has led to questioning her fidelity which is why the husband brought this matter here. For instance issue of her making reference to how she slept with someone with a bigger manhood. Even if she wanted to make him jealous she wouldn't go that far because it would be implicating her unless she wanted to boast of her escapade. Well only the op wil be in best position to know what his wife does. Let him keep his mimd open. Anything is pssivlepossible. Nevertheless I still love your contribution. Best I've read so far.

I understand all you have said. The lady is admittedly immature. The truth is the op and his wife need to sit down and tell each other how they really feel. If they can do that, their marital issues will be reduced.

Thank you for your compliment

kaffy4tope:
Don't blame the 'Ex'...Blame the prostitute you married as a woman that body language still gives the 'Ex' some hopes.



Are you sure the so called Ex have not or still banging your wife??

It is called, Okafor's law

But what kind of a man admires another lady's ass and bad enough was caught by his wife... u both aren't serious @all # there is 80percent of truth dat ur wife isn't cheating on u.. work on ursef first, then ur wife will be forced 2 respect u... # as for me, silent treatment is my weapon #

Let her understand as a husband that what she is doing is not good,even you can give some example of the bad woman and the good one around you,even u can talk to her with Bible,after this set a serious principle that u want for her and remember dont take things easy for her,so that she wil fear u&nt calling u mumu husband again,75% ladies need iron hands.

am sorry to call your wife a LovePeddler which i just did.

kaffy4tope:
Don't blame the 'Ex'...Blame the prostitute you married as a woman that body language still gives the 'Ex' some hopes.



Are you sure the so called Ex have not or still banging your wife??

.

missomo:


I understand all you have said. The lady is admittedly immature. The truth is the op and his wife need to sit down and tell each other how they really feel. If they can do that, their marital issues will be reduced.

Thank you for your compliment

True. Most relationships or marriages suffer due to lack of communication. Op and his wife should have a conversation and try to resolve their issues.

This is serious

missomo:


Sigh.

He asked for advice and I gave him mine. You could have easily given yours too but decided to attack my opinion.

I understand that you're aggressively itching for an intellectual battle but for something as minor as this I won't waste my time.

Sheathe your sword, walk away and when you find someone who cares you can unsheathe it. Good luck on your quest.

Morons can be found on this forum but there are significant percentage of intelligible individuals on here too so before you post anything it must be analytical, unbiased and have a watered down hypothesis to feed the sensible group here. Don't post cos oestrogen compels you.

1) Hit the gym, full body workout grow some muscles
2) Cut down on the beer/ in fact stop the beer.
start drinking wine once in a while.
3) Create time for family, take them on vacations.
4) Bang your wife like 4 or more times in a week. Nack am well. You can even clean plate.
5) Pray with your family morning and night.
6) Speak good words to them
With all this brotherly you will be a happy man. Find this movie to watch Prayer Room and Kama Sutra.

grossintel:
I really don't understand you sir. What are you really mad over? All I see here is a woman playing with your emotions because she has something against you. You need to be honest here cause a shady part of your story is missing. If she's cheating with her ex she won't make such implicating statement, ironically I could tell my girlfriend I went to sleep with my ex to get her jealous but I will never say this if I actually went to sleep with my ex. She's probably not cheating but you need to amend your ways, you know what I mean. Only then will she really respect you. And to all you kids calling another man's wife idiot, prostitute, I don't blame yall I blame your mother's.

If your wife or girlfriend could say such thing to your face regardless of what you have done, you are as good as a living dead. You are just a living dead. It means you are nothing to her but a piece of shit.

For a lady to utter such stupid statement to her husband... then d husband must be a dickless sissy man. Pls, keep that sermon to yourself and learn what women are all about...

Have you seen how ladies who are in love with their boyfriends behave or talk to them as oppose the ones who aren't in love? If a lady is in love with you, she ll be so mindful of what she says to you so as not to lose you

freshvine:


Morons can be found on this forum but there are significant percentage of intelligible individuals on here too so before you post anything it must be analytical, unbiased and have a watered down hypothesis to feed the sensible group here. Don't post cos oestrogen compels you.

Sigh.

And you think it's smart to reply a "slowpoke". Twice? You can't even decide if you want to be male or female on this forum and I'm the one with hormonal issues? Lol. Hermaphrodite please walk away. This is the final recognition I'll give your attention seeking rump.

I went out to Bleep a man with a bigger dickk.. What impunity, what rubbish.

My gf can't try that with me. She go hear am

In addition. She has fuckedd that ex already and might have had it with another man that you don't even know.

Okafor law at work here mehn.

Maybe her ex was her first, ladies and there ex who seems to be there first I don't know the kind of attachment they do have.

lilyheaven:

It is called, Okafor's law

don't be a stranger

missomo:


Sigh.

And you think it's smart to reply a "slowpoke". Twice? You can't even decide if you want to be male or female on this forum and I'm the one with hormonal issues? Lol. transgendered please walk away. This is the final recognition I'll give your attention seeking rump.

Thought as much. Life time member of gender equalisation disorder group.

Please make peace with your wife.

@rogovo20, in this 6yr marriage or while courting, have u ever cheated on ur wife? Or has she ever caught u sexting. You left Dt part out cos I don't know where her distrust is coming from, u only detailed where ur own distrust is stemming from.

The only reason this woman would distrust u so much & have d effontery to joke about having sex WT a bigger dick to get at u, is if uve cheated on her before.

If dts d case, then please ull have to lay on d bed u made. When trust is broken, love disappears, all dts left is just convenience and resentment. I think ur wife is hurt.

Pls my brother letting his wife know will compound issues.
Try ur best to make ur wife know that she will destroy her marriage by still seeing her ex.
Her removing the wedding ring because you looked on a lady's ass is so funny.
Instead of involving her ex's wife,I think is better to call the guy and threaten him that you are going to tell his wife what has been going on BTW him and your wife.
If you do this I bet you the guy go use him hand run 44T from your wife.
Again y will ur wife tell u jokenly that she went out to make love with guy's with bigger dick,I think you need to properly investigate that statement of her.
She might be passing info to you but you fail to notice it.
Cheers.

MrAlfa:
You should just go and check your children's DNA.

Sharp sharp!

Take the children for a DNA.


And she is a cheat.

Send the ashawu wife of yours to where she belong,,.,
AMINU KANO CRESCENT WUSE 2 ABUJA.

rogovo20:



How?

Hire private investigators.. Cheaters.

I don't understand why married couples are playing games and trying to psychologically hurt each other.

Well, while stories like this one are not my usual, my principle on matters like this one is very clear.

I WILL KICK YOU OUT!

I don't care if we have 200 million children.
I don't care if they are all infants.
I don't care if they will be raised by another man.
I don't care if your parents or my parents beg.
I don't care what your pastor says.
I wont be bothered if your village king begs.
I wont bother about your siblings or mine begging.

The fact that this is what I will do and the fact that this reaction from me is guaranteed saves me a lot of energy.

1. The lady knows way before we even get serious. You do it, and you are gone. THE BOUNDARIES ARE SET AND ARE CLEAR.
2. While I can't guarantee her fidelity, I can guarantee my reaction. I don't have to call or ask or go on Nairaland or Facebook etc. To ask what I should do. In principle what I will do is swift, clear, decisive and exacting.
3. My family and her family are aware of my no nonsense when it comes to other men. Whether ex or not.
4. I have ended relationships for much less e.g. accepting a phone gift from a guy; one was going out on a lunch date with a guy;Another was leaving my sitting room to go into the bathroom to answer a call from a "guy friend".
5. I am not begging any woman. Love or marriage is not compulsory. I can't trade a peaceful life for an embattled marriage or relationship. To me, as I pass through life, studies, work, volunteering etc. if I find love, then fine. If I don't, all good.

Talk things out with your wife. Regardless of what we say or suggest, it will still be both your responsibilities to take action. Talk things out. Try to get an agreement that no more petty games from any of you. Then watch and see.

Trying to expose the guy is giving him too much credit/regard. He did not force her to himself. I don't know why guys think their problem is with the other guy. If your wife allowed him, why blame him? Why fight him? Nah. Spare your energy for better things. Besides going headlong could spell more problems. Ignore him because no matter how you fight, if she wants, she will go back to him.

djeezy:


True. Most relationships or marriages suffer due to lack of communication. Op and his wife should have a conversation and try to resolve their issues.

But na the ones wey dem don get bring this kasala. Which other conversations?

All I can say here is nobody is sure if she has slept with ex or not. She is still attracted to him and May be the joy stick is actually bigger and better. You need to find a way into her phone and God help you she hasn't deleted their conversation. Get to know what has been happening between those two. Or involve his own wife if you can to get to his phone too. You both need to save your marrIages.
If I was the one that her phone line sieze to exist. I'll get her a new sim.

rogovo20:

Sincere opinion needed.

You see, a woman is never a finished product. She is always a raw material that you must continuously mold into the thing you want at that period. A woman is like a fluid, the man is the container and the molder of the container. A woman will take whatever shape of the container you put her in. Your work as a man is to put her inside the type of container that you can be happy with when she takes shape inside that container. It can be a strenuous job and an arduous task but the pleasure of seeing your woman conform into the kind of personality that you're proud of is priceless. I deduce from your naration that you have good wisdom in you, so I won't talk much because I know you will catch my points well. As a man, a husband and the head of your family, no matter how you love your wife, never give her total freedom, learn to set boundaries. I believe you're catching on well with my allusions and metaphors. Without pre-defined boundaries, a woman can inadvertently destroy anything, even the things she cherishes and loves. Let there be boundaries in communication, both to you and other people. There are somethings you should educate and mandate that your wife shouldn't say. Like telling you she was late because she went to have sex with a man who has a bigger dick than yours.Even if it's a joke or lie, such things should not be allowed. So set a boundary on the type of communication she makes. She is of course free to talk her mind, but let there be discipline in her communication. Next, is relational boundaries. Set boundaries on who she relates with and how far she can relate with such people. Personally, relating with ex's is a NO, but sometimes flexibility is required and there are some ex's that are still good friends. But this is where your intelligence is put to work. If there are ex's that she is allowed to talk to, #1 know who those ex's are #2 set boundaries on how far their communication can go e.g. No lonely visits. If they want to see her physically it must never be private or without your knowledge, and you must be present. #3 all texting app chats between them must be accessible to you. If she knows you will check her convos with her ex it will help keep her in check to make her check the ex from crossing the line when they chat on phone. Sometimes, my wife then, men will be messaging her but along the line I collect her phone and continue the chat and the other person doesn't know it's me and not she any longer. And sometimes along the line, some men cross the line and start flirting, thinking she is still the one on the end. Then i cut in, and say like, this is her husband, having a normal convo with my wife is ok, but flirting is unapologetically disallowed etc. Then the man corrects himself and me and my wife would laugh over it. Next time the man will be more circumspect because he doesn't know who is at the other end, whether it is me again. So he aborts his flirting mission etc. Build a strong partnership with your wife, let her know she is your bestfriend, show her she's your strongest teammate and teach her how to be a reliable teammate that is loyal and trustworthy. Never indulge unfaithfulness, make trust a vital non-negotiable requirement. Use wisdom to build your wife, and your wife will build you a happy home. All the best to you.

kaffy4tope:
Don't blame the 'Ex'...Blame the prostitute you married as a woman that body language still gives the 'Ex' some hopes.



Are you sure the so called Ex have not or still banging your wife??

You have said it all

Yes do so and free your conscience.

elfmann:

But na the ones wey dem don get bring this kasala. Which other conversations?

The right conversation. Not about arguing whose right or wrong or the party that should be blamed. This one will enable them reach a consensus. The man should also man up. He's acting too weak.

rogovo20:
Hi Nlanders,

Happy Childrens day to all the daddies and mummies. Quick one, my wife and I are 6 years into our marriage with 2 kids, from the inception of our marital union we have always had issues that stems on trust, we both have that issue, and when I say trust, it has
to strictly do with her bickering into my phone and finding somethings not worth shouting or condemning me for, rather for communication, but she does otherwise. In her own case, it had to do with her ex she always talked about when we courted for a short period before marrying. She told me she called him to seek advise and confide in him, told her to stop and threatened fire n brimstone, but later found out that she saved the guys number with another name, gave me excuse as to the reason she did it.

One faithful day, a year after marriage, 5 years ago to be precise, she had gone to the school she worked as a teacher, there also she takes my dauther who resumes at the day care there. 2 hrs later, she called me crying over the phone that there was an accident, I asked what happened, she said my daughter of 9 months old then had a severe deep cut on her lips that I should rush down. Immediately, I left and branched at the clinic where she was being stitched, I felt for the poor baby, because at that age with such injury was not nice. Immediately, I told her that we'll leave for home for the day. The clinic was not far from the school where she parked her car, so I asked for the key so I could go ahead and pick the car so we can all be going home. On reaching the car, I saw her wedding ring kept in the glove compartment. Was surprised because she always wear it, and wore it out to work. At that moment, was more worried about my daughter.

We got home, and I asked her why her ring was in the car instead of her finger,she said the reason why she removed it was because last Sunday I was staring at a girls ass and she was mad about it. In which I did, but didnt do it deliberately or seemed too obvious, I use style look, and it was more of a reflex, I am human. I apologized that very day, but to think after then, she decided to remove her ring because of that? RED FLAG. I kept my mute. Once in a while throughout the years, when we still have arguments, I ask her that I still wonder why she removed her ring, that it cant be the issue of ass staring that would make it that bad for her to do that. She kept on saying it was the reason. 5 years into the marriage now, we were having a deep discussion, then she started saying things about what happened during our early stage of marriage, that she called her ex, because that was the only person he knew as a bf then, reason why she confided in him, that he talked about leaving his wife too with two kids and run away to Canada with her bla bla bla. But the major thing about her point was that, she discussed the issue of me stearing at another womans ass with him, that was when the guy started packaging some stories that entered her head, which was the reason why she removed that ring on that faithful day. Wow! She now stated that she noticed he was trying to seduce her by seeing her, that he went to the extent of saying, if I should come and see u at that ur place of work, I might be forced to kiss you, stating that was when she knew he was trying to use words to have him come around, so he could have sex with her. I told her that whats the probability that they have not been seeing, she said NEVER. But then I reminded her of the day we had issues, she came back from work late, and I asked where she had gone, she replied by saying, I went to go and have sex with someone that has a bigger joystick that urs. She later denounced that it was a joke to get at me, its possible,, and it could be true.

Nlanders, sorry for my long story, if i dont put it down well, u wont know my stance on this issue, I wont say am a saint when I started this marriage, but I have changed, this woman up until now has not, I have another post to share right after this. Now my question here is, I WANT to keep my family regardless of whatever, but is it wise to Bleep that ex up? Because of what she told me he said, to me hes trying to spoil me to get into my wife, thats if he has not, because I one way or the other found this her ex wife number. And I have evidences to prove that she has been in communication with my wife. Or should I just let God judge? Cos as I bad reach b4 I marry, I have never, and will never sleep with a married woman, nor will I ever try to sleep with an ex who is already married. Sincere opinion needed.

I feel you both dobt understand what marriage is all about. The problem is not the ex bf and us not your wife but you. U failed to be a Man and to be in control. To communicate with ur wife that's why she finds herself going to her ex bf to talk because u so far away. Women need strong hand and companionship. U need to let her know the bases of ur relationship, it is marriage not just sex relationship. So get her naked make good love to her , do it like a job till you know she is satisfied and talk senses into her empty brains while she is naked. Let her know what you want and what you can't tolerate. She shouldn't remove her ring for anything and she dare no make a joke of tasting another man's coke to ur face. That's an insult and a taboo. Let her know it will be to her disadvantage if the marriage fails and most let you both should give your life to Christ. Get a counsellor on marriage

djeezy:
The right conversation. Not about arguing whose right or wrong or the party that should be blamed. This one will enable them reach a consensus. The man should also man up. He's acting too weak.

The woman is regretting marry him...even cash is there.. Sex is down the hill to her. Nothing d man can do.