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My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News - Romance (4) - Nairaland

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Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Nobody: 9:58pm On Oct 25, 2017
It happened to me...my oga just settled me and few years later her mother developed eye problem that can lead to blindness if not operated...and the mother is all she and her sister got their father died when they where kids...I had to sell all in my shop collected my money from those owing me...gave it to her, the money still wasn't enough remains small but was later paid by somebody....a prince...after the operation it was a success I thank God but I now have little remaining of me....she stopped caring or asking how am doing....she later told me her mom wants her to marry i said to whom she said a prince that took care of her remaining bill...but her friend who pittied me told me she has been dating a prince and the guy has proposed and she accepted....I confronted her she asked me if she's the one that ran down my business....I will never forget that day I was coming back from my shop in evening...speaking on the phone she asked me that question tears ran down my eyes in the keke.....alot happened but i stood strong managed sell all I had remaining and left nigeria to Kuala Lumpur Malaysia.....today she's not married yet, I don't know if this will make you feel any better but let her go....it's will be difficult take it go through it and move on...ITS A BLESSING IN DISGUISE if u can manage do all u can and leave Nigeria....that place will not grow ur finance

14 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by OMEGA009(m): 9:59pm On Oct 25, 2017
R. Kelly has said it All. "When a woman's outta luv, there ain't nothing you can do about it".

She's used you to get to where she wants to be and now she's giving you ultimatums? Now, she's emotionally mature 2 tie the knot and she's suddenly realized that you are not ready 2 settle down. Bro, you've been had. Just let her go and count your losses. Breakups are never easy. Like being hit on d balls, It'll hurt like a mutherfcuker but soon, you'll get over it. Besides, do you want to get married to someone who listens to everyones opinion?

Let her go and forget all that BS about "I would have loved it to be you but... ". It's all consolation prize. Been there, done that, worn the T-shirt. Just focus on your future and GOD would give you your own bone of your bone.

It's happened to me and you won't believe it when I tell you that she still call me asking for "chop money" and co from her husband house. Succeeding in life is your best form of revenge.

5 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by emmyreb(f): 9:59pm On Oct 25, 2017
There are two things involve in this, is either she's seeing someone else which I'm positive about that or she's about to, about to means she has been friend with d man in question...... secondly, you claims to love her right? pls don't beg her to stay but have it that her leaving is a stepping stone to success for you...... had similar experience but story for another day dou

2 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by sayhi2certified(m): 10:00pm On Oct 25, 2017
Demigods666:


It's not late, first I would like to help you out in your financial aspect, not asking you for money, I would like to give you something to use and watch your financial life turn around within a week, what I will give you will attract all kinds of women to you you can get a new better one if you choose, will also attract your current GF back to you. It's for both love and business prosperity. When you confirm it. You can come thank me later with something nice.

please I need it...suffer it is clean and pure

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by cococandy(f): 10:00pm On Oct 25, 2017
I’m so sorry you’re hurting.
I understand heartbreak and how awful it is.
Hugs.


My advice is to let her go if you’re not ready.
You’re mismatched based on Nigerian societal gender expectations.

She’s 24. Aka “ripe for marriage”. Anything closer to 30 she will start attracting disdain. Even you then might start looking for reason to leave her. Believe me even if you think you can’t do that, You can. You’re a product of your society.


Philosophia:


Thank you so much.

My brother, I will be candid with you. My biggest problem is that I love this lady with my beign. She is the only girlfriend I have ever had. 3years. I have often visualized our life together. We talked about family, kids, everything.

I am an introvert, who hardly gets close to people. I am a guy that usually doesn't give a Bleep unless I want to. But this stuff hit me. It hit me where it hurts. As I type this tears are springing from my eyes. I'm trying to stop but it hurts.

My whole life just seems useless. I don't know exactly what to do. I feel lost.

8 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by wristbangle: 10:01pm On Oct 25, 2017
madridguy:
What exactly did Sai Baba collected from you?


grin madridguy sef. Keneking don provoke u this evening cheesy

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by engrajoo1(m): 10:01pm On Oct 25, 2017
Well you've all spoken well in is different ways but sincerely o don't mean to mislead people here bit this is one of d reasons I won't make do with one gf not until am married sincerely human beings especially ladies ain't trust worthy and are to b feared.... They tends to change in just a twinkle of an eye.... Since d Lady I plan settling with told me that if I like I should go and doe if want that she is not interested again moreover due to my plan of settling with her I stopped my lifestyle of having multiple gf but since then I added more tyres to my extra tire no o bro I believe u can get over it of I wish to ... If I could get over one though I fell ill because of d situation trust God u can get over it and am sure God will give u d best maybe I guys ain't destined to n together

2 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by michealwale(m): 10:01pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:


Thank you so much.

My brother, I will be candid with you. My biggest problem is that I love this lady with my beign. She is the only girlfriend I have ever had. 3years. I have often visualized our life together. We talked about family, kids, everything.

I am an introvert, who hardly gets close to people. I am a guy that usually doesn't give a Bleep unless I want to. But this stuff hit me. It hit me where it hurts. As I type this tears are springing from my eyes. I'm trying to stop but it hurts.

My whole life just seems useless. I don't know exactly what to do. I feel lost.

i feel your pain man.... i have been dropped by someone i truly loved before also... and i understand no sermon or good will message can bring you out of your present dejection/ rejection.... but man... for your own good... snap out of it...you need yourself now! you need your health and mind right now.... damn it! i went through hell when i was ditched some 3years ago cos i didnt see it coming.... but you know what ....such is life my bro! let this experience be the impetus for your turning out greater and better. face the reality and move on........its tough ...but you will be great.

all the best man. be strong yo!

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by shadeyinka(m): 10:02pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:
So many things have crossed my mind. Is she seeing someone? But she assures me that she's not seeing anyone. Is she just looking for a fresh start? What did I do terribly wrong?

I am so confused. I called her, maybe to get direction or to hear something else. I'm not sure. She is advising me to fast and pray about it to get direction on what to do. She said she has prayed and fasted and she was told to prepare her mind for marriage.

I do not want to loose her but I don't know how I am supposed to do that. What is that supposed to achieve for me?

I am so lost.
You were doing Boyfriend-Girlfriend instead of courting. That's your problem.

Three years and her whole family hasn't fallen in love with you, what have you been doing?

She doesn't have anyone else but you don't seem like serious to settle down. Getting married has to do with setting the time-period and working towards it. Everything does not have to be perfect.

Money!?
I once encountered a couple where the man lost his job two weeks into marriage. He works in a bank or insurance company (not too sure).

If you manage to restore your relationship, set the ball rolling with her family. You don't even have to get married within the next two years if both your families are involved.

The girl you found has become a woman but you're still treating her like a girl. That's the key issue. If you love her go for her

7 Likes 1 Share

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by mechanics(m): 10:02pm On Oct 25, 2017
She's not for you, she's only interested in your money.

2 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by cococandy(f): 10:02pm On Oct 25, 2017
Sorry about your own heartbreak too.
Life sucks sometimes
ezenwajosh:
It happened to me...my oga just settled me and few years later her mother developed eye problem that can lead to blindness if not operated...and the mother is all she and her sister got their father died when they where kids...I had to sell all in my shop collected my money from those owing me...gave it to her, the money still wasn't enough remains small but was later paid by somebody....a prince...after the operation it was a success I thank God but I now have little remaining of me....she stopped caring or asking how am doing....she later told me her mom wants her to marry i said to whom she said a prince that took care of her remaining bill...but her friend who pittied me told me she has been dating a prince and the guy has proposed and she accepted....I confronted her she asked me if she's the one that ran down my business....I will never forget that day I was coming back from my shop in evening...speaking on the phone she asked me that question tears ran down my eyes in the keke.....alot happened but i stood strong managed sell all I had remaining and left nigeria to Kuala Lumpur Malaysia.....today she's not married yet, I don't know if this will make you feel any better but let her go....it's will be difficult take it go through it and move on...ITS A BLESSING IN DISGUISE if u can manage do all u can and leave Nigeria....that place will not grow ur finance

2 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by ofalu047(m): 10:02pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:
Hello Romancelanders,

Please help me! I have a very serious issue on my hands. I opened this account because of this, for advice from you. It's actually a long story, but I will try to keep it short.

I have been in a relationship with my gf for 3yrs+ now. We had both not been ready for marriage at the time. She said she had things that she wanted to achieve so she would give herself 5yrs. I felt the same way too but I was looking at my age to settle down as 29 or 30. She was almost 21 at the time, I was 24 at the time.

When I met her she was a shaken, frightened, stubborn and love-starved young lady. Her parents were trying to force into marriage with a "family friend's" son whom she did not like plus she was not ready to settle down at the time. Her father is a retired military man and would use extreme measures like locking her up in a room for days. Anyways, I supported her in everyway I could at the time even at a time meeting the so-called "family friend's" son. I did not intend to get into a relationship at the time but certain things happened and I began to fall in love with her plus she needed love and care so badly. She is a very smart, motivated and beautiful young lady.

We got into a relationship and with time, the pressure as regards marrying the guy died or so I thought. From then till now, we have both been striving hard to make things get better. She was trying to run a business while I was working at a small magazine company. Unfortunately I admit, even though I was not earning much at the magazine, I was careless with my finances. I would spend on her, us and on a couple of mundane things but the bulk was on her and us.

Well, the financial crunch hit and I lost my job being owed several months in back-salary. I had very little savings. Things were not going too well with her in her business either. And so what little savings I had plus borrowed money from my parents joined with her own funds(including borrowed money), we started a business. We have been almost a year into the business now. Things are so dull. She hardly comes to the office anymore. I manage to go with little funds raised from teaching at minor places plus my parents support. We have been trying a "new" field though which seems a bit positive.

You have the back story now. Here is the problem.

Of recent, her body language and speech + whatsapp chat seemed to be dodgy, non-committal and atimes even coated with disdain. I knew something was wrong. I had wanted to talk to her and she said she wanted to discuss something with me as well, but she had basically refused to show-up when I call her out. Well, I was not so much a fan of going to her house because of chances of meeting her mum plus her several siblings But I braved it and showed up at her house on Sunday. I asked her what the matter was.

She told me of how her family was pressuring her and almost everyone she met was telling her to try and settle down. She said how she knows that I am not ready to settle down anytime soon. She said she had been praying about it and she has received an answer that she should settle down and that she do so before this time next year. She wants to get married before her birthday. People, she said several things and I said several things and I walked out angrily and dazed but I just gave the highlight of the issue. I could not wrap my head properly around it for a while but later I calmed down and I asked her a few questions.

It seems her mind is made up on marriage. She says she would prefer if it was me because she loves me, but if not, it is the will of God. She said some other things. I am just dazed and I don't know how to take it or how to act or what to do.

My life is not where I want it to be. I don't have the resources to turn things around right now. I am in a quagmire. Please Help!

Your life is far from over. Your life is just starting. Infact thank your stars that she wants to leave your life.
A lady you have been with for 3 yrs and you never had a positive tale to tell except "Love tales", if you spend 100 years with such, you will only have love tales to tell, and nothing more.
I take you are still 27 or thereabout. Thats a very good sign. Shows you still have so much to time to get your acts together.
You might ask, how do l know this? I have been in your shoes before bro. Infact quite recently, l experienced similar fate. Mine was 6yrs relationship. Good thing was l saw it coming and l prepared ny mind for the worst. Lo and behold, the worst happened. She got married 3 months after we broke up, and she is already pregnant.
How is my life now, you might ask? Fantastic!
Focus on ur life as it is now. Life is not a race. It might be hard, but let it go.
You can meet a lady tomorrow that will turn your life around directly or indirectly in less than a year.

5 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by tijaniu7(m): 10:03pm On Oct 25, 2017
bro i feel ur pain!u deserve nothing more than the best,u hv really done alot of sacrfices,if she is yours she wl surelly come back to you,if she is not yours then be patient you wl have the best.

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Bibi294(f): 10:04pm On Oct 25, 2017
Mrnairalandd:
Learn from my story @Op

I was in the same mess like your situation few years ago, i loved the lady with everything in me.

I did everything in my dream and reality to make things happen but all failed

Family was putting pressure on her to marry cos age wasn’t on her side

We did everything together, we played like siblings, we laughed and played like kids

I swear, if you see us in store or public gathering, you ll be jealous of how wonderful and beautiful our relationship was

We were in love.

In my mind, she was already my wife

But my pocket was saying otherwise

To cut the long story short, the fate that is about to befall you became my reality. I cried like a baby

I cried, cried and cried

Friends and foes couldn’t believe a lady could turn me to what i became; a useless being.

Fast forward to three months after she left, unknown to me that God has a better plan for me, i began to use the time i used to waste with her for something more productive.

All the little Money i used to spend was going to my saving Account and i began to think more of success in life. I devoted my time to become a successful man in life.

As at the time she left, i hardly had #2,000 in my Account.

Guess what, within a year she left, i bought my first little investment with #1.2 million and quickly bought more business acquisitions with little money i have for future investment...

Today, i stayed away from relationships completely cos i realise it is waste of time and energy.

I am pleased to inform you that i am in a better position today and thank God for her departure from my life.

Please, pick a lesson from my story and use your time judiciously towards productivity than a relationship that ll probably keep you and your future generation in penury.

Go and conquer the world.





Your story is quite inspiring and soothing... Hope OP will learn from this...

Find love... It's sweet...

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Godful: 10:05pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:
So many things have crossed my mind. Is she seeing someone? But she assures me that she's not seeing anyone. Is she just looking for a fresh start? What did I do terribly wrong?

I am so confused. I called her, maybe to get direction or to hear something else. I'm not sure. She is advising me to fast and pray about it to get direction on what to do. She said she has prayed and fasted and she was told to prepare her mind for marriage.

I do not want to loose her but I don't know how I am supposed to do that. What is that supposed to achieve for me?

I am so lost.
. it is time for you to grow up. as a man you must be a bit emotional but don't act based on emotions, act based on reasons. let her go

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Duru009(m): 10:05pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:


Thank you so much.

My brother, I will be candid with you. My biggest problem is that I love this lady with my beign. She is the only girlfriend I have ever had. 3years. I have often visualized our life together. We talked about family, kids, everything.

I am an introvert, who hardly gets close to people. I am a guy that usually doesn't give a Bleep unless I want to. But this stuff hit me. It hit me where it hurts. As I type this tears are springing from my eyes. I'm trying to stop but it hurts.

My whole life just seems useless. I don't know exactly what to do. I feel lost.


My brother fuvk whatever feeling u have with her. That is in the past now. Its very clear she doesn't want you again. You can't waste a ladies time whose biological clock is ticking daily....
Forcing it now will be too dangerous especially for the future irrespective of how many years you spend together.
Thre are so many ladies out dre. Pray to God, ur match will certainly locate u.

From her body language,Its very clear this one is not for uuuuuuu.....


Finally, the early u move on with your life NOW!. The better for u !

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by cococandy(f): 10:05pm On Oct 25, 2017
But 6 years of relationship. How long were you planning on dating her?

ofalu047:


Your life is far from over. Your life is just starting. Infact thank your stars that she wants to leave your life.
A lady you have been with for 3 yrs and you never had a positive tale to tell except "Love tales", if you spend 100 years with such, you will only have love tales to tell, and nothing more.
I take you are still 27 or thereabout. Thats a very good sign. Shows you still have so much to time to get your acts together.
You might ask, how do l know this? I have been in your shoes before bro. Infact quite recently, l experienced similar fate. Mine was 6yrs relationship. Good thing was l saw it coming and l prepared ny mind for the worst. Lo and behold, the worst happened. She got married 3 months after we broke up, and she is already pregnant.
How is my life now, you might ask? Fantastic!
Focus on ur life as it is now. Life is not a race. It might be hard, but let it go.
You can meet a lady tomorrow that will turn your life around directly or indirectly in less than a year.

3 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by bayocanny: 10:05pm On Oct 25, 2017
chillychill:
Three years relationship ha! cry
I dey tell you chillychill grin no be small thing

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Rubbiish(m): 10:05pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:


Thank you so much.

My brother, I will be candid with you. My biggest problem is that I love this lady with my beign. She is the only girlfriend I have ever had. 3years. I have often visualized our life together. We talked about family, kids, everything.

I am an introvert, who hardly gets close to people. I am a guy that usually doesn't give a Bleep unless I want to. But this stuff hit me. It hit me where it hurts. As I type this tears are springing from my eyes. I'm trying to stop but it hurts.

My whole life just seems useless. I don't know exactly what to do. I feel lost.
Weakling....This was how adam landed us in this mess we are facing because of his weak nature...No be your mates they fight boko haram for sambisa forest? Here u are, crying on NL like a baby because of one dirty girl... undecided

4 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Nobody: 10:06pm On Oct 25, 2017
shadeyinka:

You were doing Boyfriend-Girlfriend instead of courting. That's your problem.

Three years and her whole family hasn't fallen in love with you, what have you been doing?

She doesn't have anyone else but you don't seem like serious to settle down. Getting married has to do with setting the time-period and working towards it. Everything does not have to be perfect.

Money!?
I once encountered a couple where the man lost his job two weeks into marriage. He works in a bank or insurance company (not too sure).

If you manage to restore your relationship, set the ball rolling with her family. You don't even have to get married within the next two years if both your families are involved.

The girl you found has become a woman but you're still treating her like a girl. That's the key issue. If you love her go for her

Oga, think Well !!! He his poor. Which Family will fall in love with that kinda person. Family wants a man that will come and take away their Poverty using their beautiful daughter.

Can't you read from the lines?

9 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by engrajoo1(m): 10:06pm On Oct 25, 2017
Well you've all spoken well in is different ways but sincerely o don't mean to mislead people here bit this is one of d reasons I won't make do with one gf not until am married sincerely human beings especially ladies ain't trust worthy and are to b feared.... They tends to change in just a twinkle of an eye.... Since d Lady I plan settling with told me that if I like I should go and doe if want that she is not interested again moreover due to my plan of settling with her I stopped my lifestyle of having multiple gf but since then I added more tyres to my extra tire no o bro I believe u can get over it of I wish to ... If I could get over one though I fell ill because of d situation trust God u can get over it and am sure God will give u d best maybe I guys ain't destined to n together ..... Trust me ur supposed gf is seeing another person in fact it myt b that guy she usually tell u he is just aere friend and I mwber take cognisance of

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Bibi294(f): 10:06pm On Oct 25, 2017
shadeyinka:

You were doing Boyfriend-Girlfriend instead of courting. That's your problem.

Three years and her whole family hasn't fallen in love with you, what have you been doing?

She doesn't have anyone else but you don't seem like serious to settle down. Getting married has to do with setting the time-period and working towards it. Everything does not have to be perfect.

Money!?
I once encountered a couple where the man lost his job two weeks into marriage. He works in a bank or insurance company (not too sure).

If you manage to restore your relationship, set the ball rolling with her family. You don't even have to get married within the next two years if both your families are involved.

The girl you found has become a woman but you're still treating her like a girl. That's the key issue. If you love her go for her
...because this is coming from a guy with senses... I doff my hat
Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by vjohnson: 10:06pm On Oct 25, 2017
My dear don't bother for anything in this life. She is going for another best to come
Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Nobody: 10:06pm On Oct 25, 2017
cococandy:
Sorry about your own heartbreak too.
Life sucks sometimes

EHHHHHNN !!! Madam Feminist. So you too can be so nice like this? smiley Wawu !!!
Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by ipobarecriminals: 10:07pm On Oct 25, 2017
sad leave her/let her go..Dnt go and borrow for a one day event.U dnt need to stress. urself over her.But if u decide to settle down with her now,make sure u rent a self contain mini flat/2 bedroom. apartments not one baba jamiu/papa chinwe F2F with one toilet otherwise!

2 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by bobkezel(m): 10:07pm On Oct 25, 2017
Bro, never marry a lady desperate to get married, worst mistake ever. She is manipulating you, don't succumb.

8 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Notatribalist(m): 10:07pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:


Thank you so much.

My brother, I will be candid with you. My biggest problem is that I love this lady with my beign. She is the only girlfriend I have ever had. 3years. I have often visualized our life together. We talked about family, kids, everything.

I am an introvert, who hardly gets close to people. I am a guy that usually doesn't give a Bleep unless I want to. But this stuff hit me. It hit me where it hurts. As I type this tears are springing from my eyes. I'm trying to stop but it hurts.

My whole life just seems useless. I don't know exactly what to do. I feel lost.
eyah.sorry man,I feel touched also.your story is similar to mine,but you gat to move on.you have no choice but to move on,who knows you might find a better lady..

1 Like

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Bibi294(f): 10:07pm On Oct 25, 2017
Rubbiish:

Weakling....This was how adam landed us in this mess we are facing because of his weak nature...No be your mates they fight boko haram for sambisa forest? Here u are, crying on NL like a baby because of one dirty girl... undecided
When you don't know what it means to love...
Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by presido997(m): 10:08pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:
Hello Romancelanders,

Please help me! I have a very serious issue on my hands. I opened this account because of this, for advice from you. It's actually a long story, but I will try to keep it short.

I have been in a relationship with my gf for 3yrs+ now. We had both not been ready for marriage at the time. She said she had things that she wanted to achieve so she would give herself 5yrs. I felt the same way too but I was looking at my age to settle down as 29 or 30. She was almost 21 at the time, I was 24 at the time.

When I met her she was a shaken, frightened, stubborn and love-starved young lady. Her parents were trying to force into marriage with a "family friend's" son whom she did not like plus she was not ready to settle down at the time. Her father is a retired military man and would use extreme measures like locking her up in a room for days. Anyways, I supported her in everyway I could at the time even at a time meeting the so-called "family friend's" son. I did not intend to get into a relationship at the time but certain things happened and I began to fall in love with her plus she needed love and care so badly. She is a very smart, motivated and beautiful young lady.

We got into a relationship and with time, the pressure as regards marrying the guy died or so I thought. From then till now, we have both been striving hard to make things get better. She was trying to run a business while I was working at a small magazine company. Unfortunately I admit, even though I was not earning much at the magazine, I was careless with my finances. I would spend on her, us and on a couple of mundane things but the bulk was on her and us.

Well, the financial crunch hit and I lost my job being owed several months in back-salary. I had very little savings. Things were not going too well with her in her business either. And so what little savings I had plus borrowed money from my parents joined with her own funds(including borrowed money), we started a business. We have been almost a year into the business now. Things are so dull. She hardly comes to the office anymore. I manage to go with little funds raised from teaching at minor places plus my parents support. We have been trying a "new" field though which seems a bit positive.

You have the back story now. Here is the problem.

Of recent, her body language and speech + whatsapp chat seemed to be dodgy, non-committal and atimes even coated with disdain. I knew something was wrong. I had wanted to talk to her and she said she wanted to discuss something with me as well, but she had basically refused to show-up when I call her out. Well, I was not so much a fan of going to her house because of chances of meeting her mum plus her several siblings But I braved it and showed up at her house on Sunday. I asked her what the matter was.

She told me of how her family was pressuring her and almost everyone she met was telling her to try and settle down. She said how she knows that I am not ready to settle down anytime soon. She said she had been praying about it and she has received an answer that she should settle down and that she do so before this time next year. She wants to get married before her birthday. People, she said several things and I said several things and I walked out angrily and dazed but I just gave the highlight of the issue. I could not wrap my head properly around it for a while but later I calmed down and I asked her a few questions.

It seems her mind is made up on marriage. She says she would prefer if it was me because she loves me, but if not, it is the will of God. She said some other things. I am just dazed and I don't know how to take it or how to act or what to do.

My life is not where I want it to be. I don't have the resources to turn things around right now. I am in a quagmire. Please Help!
Bro I will advice u to settle down now if u love ur gf, only God knows when u will be buoyant financially it may be after d marriage ur way will open,,,, my opinion though

2 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by databoy247(m): 10:09pm On Oct 25, 2017
Philosophia:
Hello Romancelanders,

Please help me! I have a very serious issue on my hands. I opened this account because of this, for advice from you. It's actually a long story, but I will try to keep it short.

I have been in a relationship with my gf for 3yrs+ now. We had both not been ready for marriage at the time. She said she had things that she wanted to achieve so she would give herself 5yrs. I felt the same way too but I was looking at my age to settle down as 29 or 30. She was almost 21 at the time, I was 24 at the time.

When I met her she was a shaken, frightened, stubborn and love-starved young lady. Her parents were trying to force into marriage with a "family friend's" son whom she did not like plus she was not ready to settle down at the time. Her father is a retired military man and would use extreme measures like locking her up in a room for days. Anyways, I supported her in everyway I could at the time even at a time meeting the so-called "family friend's" son. I did not intend to get into a relationship at the time but certain things happened and I began to fall in love with her plus she needed love and care so badly. She is a very smart, motivated and beautiful young lady.

We got into a relationship and with time, the pressure as regards marrying the guy died or so I thought. From then till now, we have both been striving hard to make things get better. She was trying to run a business while I was working at a small magazine company. Unfortunately I admit, even though I was not earning much at the magazine, I was careless with my finances. I would spend on her, us and on a couple of mundane things but the bulk was on her and us.

Well, the financial crunch hit and I lost my job being owed several months in back-salary. I had very little savings. Things were not going too well with her in her business either. And so what little savings I had plus borrowed money from my parents joined with her own funds(including borrowed money), we started a business. We have been almost a year into the business now. Things are so dull. She hardly comes to the office anymore. I manage to go with little funds raised from teaching at minor places plus my parents support. We have been trying a "new" field though which seems a bit positive.

You have the back story now. Here is the problem.

Of recent, her body language and speech + whatsapp chat seemed to be dodgy, non-committal and atimes even coated with disdain. I knew something was wrong. I had wanted to talk to her and she said she wanted to discuss something with me as well, but she had basically refused to show-up when I call her out. Well, I was not so much a fan of going to her house because of chances of meeting her mum plus her several siblings But I braved it and showed up at her house on Sunday. I asked her what the matter was.

She told me of how her family was pressuring her and almost everyone she met was telling her to try and settle down. She said how she knows that I am not ready to settle down anytime soon. She said she had been praying about it and she has received an answer that she should settle down and that she do so before this time next year. She wants to get married before her birthday. People, she said several things and I said several things and I walked out angrily and dazed but I just gave the highlight of the issue. I could not wrap my head properly around it for a while but later I calmed down and I asked her a few questions.

It seems her mind is made up on marriage. She says she would prefer if it was me because she loves me, but if not, it is the will of God. She said some other things. I am just dazed and I don't know how to take it or how to act or what to do.

My life is not where I want it to be. I don't have the resources to turn things around right now. I am in a quagmire. Please Help!

I love your writing skills. Should you come back to this thread, PM me. I may have a position for you. In fact, I need someone like you on my team.

3 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by Augustap(f): 10:10pm On Oct 25, 2017
You should leave her and continue your hustles. Since she has made up her mind, there's nothing you can do about it. A desperate woman is fiercer than a raging lion. If you try to hold her back, she may end up humiliating you and you'd be making one of the greatest mistakes of your life. Her heart is taken. I wish you luck.

3 Likes

Re: My Girlfriend Hit Me With A Sudden News by madridguy(m): 10:10pm On Oct 25, 2017
No mind the wailer jare grin

wristbangle:


grin madridguy sef. Keneking don provoke u this evening cheesy

2 Likes

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