@OP this doctor,do u usually call or he calls u first b4 a visit to his home,still if the amswer is no,does he give u access to the phone nos of close family members like his ma, favorite sis or cousin.you've seen warning sign already any way .holding back info from you when he ought to be ur own 'paddy' and big bro is a no no for me,or well, what do i know s*x with him just once can open him up to you.It could be so many things,he may naturally be a guy who hold things in(like me),a previous bad relationship e.t.c.listen to ur own inner person, we all aren't there with you to study him.feel it, know it,good luck

Ginaz:


Abeg shift one corner. cos someone is abroad means they can't be dated? What is so big about the abroad that you tagged her a gold digger ? Is abroad heaven? Your way of reasoning is very low if I may say. People find love across continents it doesn't mean it is done for money.

Jeeez, such a mentality you have!

My dear, u need to rest.. He just told her d ugly truth... Most guys abroad left a serious relationship in nigeria.. They didnt pick their fiance online.. I bet u this guy is also chatting on whatsapp with about 30 of her type nd might b returning to wed his heartrob he left here.... Thats men 4 u

Ourown:
At 27 abi Continue

pls forgive his manners

thatsincerechic:
What advice do you need?
Its obvious the doctor is after the cookie, he doesn't say much because he has nothing to say, he is simply looking forward to sleeping with you.
Are you sure he is not married?
Take you time and study the abroad guy, if it feels right , good luck to you.

Go with this advice

Radiant1020:
Relationship is not everything. Concentrate in building yourself and somewhere along the line the right man will surface

This is exactly what I've told myself.

Igbo girls been forming Mary the mother of Jesus since the time of metusela ,I'm not attracted to him" but u visit his house . Imagine if he had raped u on those occasions and u wee come here shouting rape abi? Continue to fool urself, thank God lukaku is not the only one traded on olx ,u are gonna be included soon . Just see 27 as 17 and dont define ur priority. It seems to me u are after the ready made guys . No go work oo

CHRISTIAN71:

Madam English teacher, I Will do that to show you that no matter the height I have gotten to, I am still teachable. You are taking a little matter too personal. Like daddy freeze and the pastors, instead of seeing the point that is passed across, they attacked his personality.
Well, before I forget, you should try to check the difference between pragmatic and dogmatic, and compare same to my point of view, so you understand that it's not about typing but knowing exactly what message you are passing across. You quoted me out of context, but I was too wise not to attack your mistake but focused on your message.
I believe after reading the above, you will not derail again from the message and give me a justifiable reason why a so called Virgin would throw reservation to the wind and start dating two guys.

Look at the epistle! I stand with dogmatic.

Ginaz:


Abeg shift one corner. cos someone is abroad means they can't be dated? What is so big about the abroad that you tagged her a gold digger ? Is abroad heaven? Your way of reasoning is very low if I may say. People find love across continents it doesn't mean it is done for money.

Jeeez, such a mentality you have!

Ginaz, she got to be careful with 'abroad guys'. those guys are often than not very slippery - they woo babes just to enjoy their holiday trips in Nigeria.

Op, do not close the door thinking you have got a guy in the 'abroad guy' - like someone said, keep your options open. That Doctor, he is a booty hunter, flee else he will after slamming you his d.ck

What matter most in a relationship is 'character'. Wether we have sex on the first day or after a year, you'l stil go if i didnt see any wife properties in you.

[quote author=savvy12 post=63196891]Pls guys,I need your advice.
No insults please.

I have two men in my life right now.

The first one is a medical doctor at nauth in nnewi. According to him, he is 37 years old(10 yes older than me) but I still don't believe him cos he looks much older than his assumed age. He looks 40ish. And he is sort of secretive. He doesn't like talking about himself.we started dating last year before I lost my dad.

Things have been going well but the problem is that he has been pestering me for sex. But I'm not ready to have sex with him cos I'm not attracted to him. I went to his apartment as usual last week Sunday and he tried to initiate sex but I refused and told him I wasn't ready for it. He got angry and drove me to the park where I entered bus to my house. Since then he hasn't called or spoken to me.

I'm worried right now. I feel like he will leave me after he succeeds in having sex with me. That's why I refused him sex.

pls note,I'm not a goldigger cos I'm not the type that demand money from guys.He gets angry whenever he offers me money and I refuse.

I am also dating a second guy who is abroad. He lives in Canada. I got his number through his sister who is a friend of mine. We have been chatting for 3months now and he seems like a nice guy. He said he will come back to Nigeria after applying for his citizenship card next year.

I'm confused right now.I don't know whether to forget about the doctor and focus on the abroad guy or should I beg the doc and allow him have sex with me.
I have not had any relationship for a maximum of 2years cos the guys I meet always want from me even I try not to demand anything from them.
pls I need ad
ladies of this age bracket 25-35 do throw their dignity and womanhood into open just to get a man to end up with thereby constituting to their own problem.don't let men see that you're desperate for them or you end up being a sex object as for that your Canadian bfrnd, you wan marry a man that will keep you in naija while he is out there nourishing his Canadian wifey

How many fiancé only you wan come get?

savvy12:

Yeah,I was dating him becos I had no option.
We broke up sometime last year becos of this sex matter and he called last year November and begged me and I agreed to date him.
Asides,the fact that I'm attracted to him,his secretive nature bothers me so much.
I told him everything about myself but he doesn't open to me.
The main reason I denied

if you dont trust someone you meet everyday and speak to every day and visit his house everyday,how do you then trust and believe someone in far away Canada?Does this sound logical?

Secondly,what has age got to do with the feelings you have?you said you think he is 40yrs even though he told you he is 37yrs and you are 27yrs? what happened to the age is but a number you ladies bring up when a guy said it seems his girlfriend is older than him?

You cant be dating two guys at the same time and telling us you are confused...what do you want to be before?confusion is being at a cross road and not knowing which to chose cos you already set out to be at the cross road.

I don't think demand for sex is the major reason you are having a second thought...you have said it all that you are not attracted to this doctor..so please ma can you tell us what is the attraction?Money right? even though you said you don't demand for money from this doctor which you also know is not the truth...why?you are not attracted to him meaning you don't like his person and you are not attracted to his money..so na his bedroom you are attracted to?

common...you said you don't have an option that's why you are dating him..who told you that...i think that doctor is the only man in the whole of Nnewi axis or again except you are more ugly than uwaezuoke for you not to have an option of other men looking your way and if you dont have an option what is the Canadian based guy?spare tyre?...

better tell yourself exactly what you want.

you are just a golddigger.
if your friends brother was not in canada, will u ve chatted
you dont want to Bleep the old doctor cos he has not given u gifts and money

Ginaz:


Abeg shift one corner. cos someone is abroad means they can't be dated? What is so big about the abroad that you tagged her a gold digger ? Is abroad heaven? Your way of reasoning is very low if I may say. People find love across continents it doesn't mean it is done for money.

Jeeez, such a mentality you have!

people replying a lady who does not know what she want out of life, dating someone you are not attracted to should be hello no in first place, wouldn't even keep anyone I'm not attracted to as friend, I do not displeasure my self to please others and dating someone online as its bigges riskt, the same man can be typing to different girls on chat at the same time, you know what I'm talking about. He might even be fucking pussy while saying love you to the said babe on chat. That's how yahoo yahoo come into existence and for the girl not demanding is a bonus to the guy. Who will not love to keep such girl on chat with other girls along, after knackered her, you know if he is genuinely minded or not and people deceiving her 27 don't know time ran faster, we are already close to 2018 do they should start saying at 28 then wait for June world cup, Getting hurt makes you a better lady sometimes. Relationship is a black market, God will help her sha

Hipsofagoddess:


Look at the epistle! I stand with dogmatic.

This is a forum, Pm me

ogorwyne:

Haba! Ease up jor. What's the fight for?

I wonder .

Why did you do.that

nams77:

You are sure about that? I really didn't want to contribute but this your comment pulled me out. My dear, you can never be sure. I have seen men whose wife and children reside abroad and they live life here like complete bachelors.
There was even a case in my office recently. The man's family lives in pH. He pays flight ticket for my colleague to come and see him in Abuja. He has gone to see her family and they have even bought clothes for introduction and traditional wedding! Can anything be more real than these? But she later found out and her heart is in pieces as I write this.
Be wise. Don't make commitment just yet. Don't be in a hurry to give in. The right person will come along. You will have to kiss a few ugly frogs before ur prince charming comes around

Can I kiss you before my princess comes along?

cruchenutii:


Can I kiss you before my princess comes along?

Sorry dude. I'm a man

gentleiphy:


common...you said you don't have an option that's why you are dating him..who told you that...i think that doctor is the only man in the whole of Nnewi axis or again except you are more ugly than uwaezuoke for you not to have an option of other men looking your way and if you dont have an option what is the Canadian based guy?spare tyre?...

better tell yourself exactly what you want.

Hehehe, Guy you are funny o, In the whole of Nnewi axis uwaezuoke isn't even that ugly though And the Canadian guy is now a Dunlop spare tyre

Infact the OP + this whole thread + commenters is just too darn funny !!!

nams77:

Sorry dude. I'm a man

Ok o, your statement about frogs was so funny, I had to put some sarcasm into it lol. Funny thing is this lady we are all advising will end up ignoring all the advises and do what is on her mind

savvy12:
I have dated him for more than a year.
I met him early last year when my dad was admitted in the hospital.
yeah,I was in relationship with him when I was dating the other guy because I was having some doubts about him.
The primary reason for refusing him sex is because I'm a virgin.I didn't say it here initially cos I know people will call me all sorts of name becos I'm a virgin at 27.
what have I offered him? our relationship was never boring.we discuss everyday and encourage each other.
He said he likes me and plans to marry me.But I told him to wait small.

Please cut all ties with the doctor. Stop dating him. You are not attracted to him, so there is absolutely no reason to continue dating him. He would feel that you were simply leading him on.

As for the Canada guy, ask more detailed questions from him. Doesn't he have family members in Nigeria? What about friends? Investigate his background, until you feel comfortable. There are no guarantees that things would work out between you both. You might meet him in the flesh, and get totally turned off. How is he planning to get his citizenship? Is it by marrying a Canadian citizen or by applying through another route? Ask deep questions and make sure you get correct answers from him. Investigate his claims. If he appears vague, hesitant or shifty, dump him.

Then go out and meet people. Attend conferences, seminars, events and workshops. Let God direct you. You might meet a genuine, honest, attractive, single man that you would end up falling in love with, and could end up marrying.

For me I will say stick with d Canadian guy. Forget d doctor. He is a hit n run. After sex he will dump u surely.

Keep a good relationship with d Canadian guy, but ask or request anything from him, but if he offers to give u something, please accept it. Don't bombard him ur problems.

Always ask him how he is fairing over there, how is d weather treating him, how is work, combine with bills to pay. I tell u, u will be 1st in his mind. Each time u chat ask if he has eaten, what did u eat. African meal or fast food etc. Try build ur conversation around his well-being. Talk less of urself often except when asked n be brief about it.

Above all make sure u find out if he is not married to a white lady over here.

Best of luck sister.

Of course you have an option, don't look at your age and take wrong decisions. Give it time and choose who is right for you.

savvy12:

I dated him cos I had no option.
Thanks for ur advice. I appreciate.

savvy12:

so I should sleep with him because I'm 27?

Don't mind that silly man, if he is truly serious ... Why can't he marry you since he is ripe for marriage and then get the sex for a lifetime ?

Cos many men are not to be trusted with your body, he may have his way and dump you .

The guy is after sex only, forget about him.

Savvy12 , hope u see this comment ?

Vivere:

Please cut all ties with the doctor. Stop dating him. You are not attracted to him, so there is absolutely no reason to continue dating him. He would feel that you were simply leading him on.

As for the Canada guy, ask more detailed questions from him. Doesn't he have family members in Nigeria? What about friends? Investigate his background, until you feel comfortable. There are no guarantees that things would work out between you both. You might meet him in the flesh, and get totally turned off. How is he planning to get his citizenship? Is it by marrying a Canadian citizen or by applying through another route? Ask deep questions and make sure you get correct answers from him. Investigate his claims. If he appears vague, hesitant or shifty, dump him.

Then go out and meet people. Attend conferences, seminars, events and workshops. Let God direct you. You might meet a genuine, honest, attractive, single man that you would end up falling in love with, and could end up marrying.

Thats the problem...once we hear abroad the game is set,so she should start getting attracted the the canadian based cos Canada is involved and so she must also ask how the Canadian plans to get his citizenship and all that...selection criteria requirement?...so now maybe her attraction will shift to Canada citizenship and not love....so she can even love someone far away in Canada and get attracted just like that?then suffice to say that this lady is not after love but for gain..simple.

we have plenty men in Nigeria that she can start and build her life with...must not be ready made,she too she should stand up and make the money or relocate to Canada herself abi singles no dey relocate to abroad?

gentleiphy:
Thats the problem...once we hear abroad the game is set,so she should start getting attracted the the canadian based cos Canada is involved and so she must also ask how the Canadian plans to get his citizenship and all that...selection criteria requirement?...so now maybe her attraction will shift to Canada citizenship and not love....so she can even love someone far away in Canada and get attracted just like that?then suffice to say that this lady is not after love but for gain..simple.

we have plenty men in Nigeria that she can start and build her life with...must not be ready made,she too she should stand up and make the money or relocate to Canada herself abi singles no dey relocate to abroad?

Read the girl's comments again. She is not attracted to the doctor for a lot of reasons. But she definitely likes the Canada-based guy, even though she has not seen him. So my advise was for her to get to know all she can about him, before she makes up her mind. But I also let her know, that she might get to meet him, and lose interest in him at first sight.

The 3rd option, is to start meeting single guys here. But she needs to have discarded the first two guys before she can proceed with this 3rd option. She needs to be free from both of them, before embarking on this course of action so she doesnt get confused, or end up cheating on anybody. Now, what is wrong with that?

Vivere:


Read the girl's comments again. She is not attracted to the doctor for a lot of reasons. But she definitely likes the Canada-based guy, even though she has not seen him. So my advise was for her to get to know all she can about him, before she makes up her mind. But I also let her know, that she might get to meet him, and lose interest in him at first sight.

The 3rd option, is to start meeting single guys here. But she needs to have discarded the first two guys before she can proceed with this 3rd option. She needs to be free from both of them, before embarking on this course of action so she doesnt get confused, or end up cheating on anybody. Now, what is wrong with that?

she is not attracted to the Doctor and she is here sulking about whether to go back to him or not...so what exactly was the reason she is yet to break up with the Doctor and start early to look for the person she is attracted to...case of i have yam,i dont like it but i just want to keep looking at it..

now the truth which this girl and her doctor sex marketer knows very well is...the girl is not in the relationship for marriage,she is just bored and need company but dont want to give cos thats not why she visits the doctor...and the Doctor?he too is not yet ready for marriage,he is after the prize in between her thighs...action?both dey fool themselves and should call it quits.

brightmac:
She might end up in Libya

Dude! That pics is disgusting.

As far as am concerned u are single.... U are not dating anybody.... U don't hv feelings for the one u see and u have feelings for the one u don't n hvnt seen. Truly some women though.....
My advice, bring out the woman in u and work on the doctor, there's a saying that u can see Mr. Left and drag him to the right...that is how a smart girl works. Still maintain your no sex stance...but if u don't want to marry him at all...just take a walk. U might not even end up with either of dem

majekdom2:
you don see am now. I say it, most ladies that are well over 26 and aren't married or in any meaningful relationship are the cause of their problems. Nothing spiritual. A guy that waited upto a year before initiating sex is unattractive because she is chatting with some dude screwing another lady in Canada, a guy she met 3 months ago. . At 30, you will see her carrying bible and praying

Best comment on this page. Thumbs up bro. Many relaxer-filled brain out there!