Fikzy:

I once tried toasting a girl by composing a love letter using lyrics from All for one's "I Swear" Song and a combination of boys II Men's hits of those days. i spent about 3 days writing, editing and reviewing. eventually, I got a friend of her friend to give her the letter.

The thing about those days and writing letters is that there are some letter that after reading it you know yourself that this rhymes can woo the dame-st of girl.

So counting on my hard-work, I boldly cross her every part (which i have avoided for a long time) hoping to catch a smile and so good feedback. when i finally saw her, she did give me a smile, and a reply letter, and some words,  "My mum read the letter and asked me to correct all your spelling mistakes. she also said I should tell you to concentrate on your English Language textbook or else she will report me to the principal. " Damn,

When I opened the letters, it was like looking at a teacher marking your Composition. there were errors crossed out with red biro and some of my the lyrics where i wrote "I sit down questioning your eyes" was corrected to " I see the questions in your eyes",  Kai,

Omo, that experience made me a regular with every magazine that gives out Musical lyrics all through JSS years into SS classes,  I got better with the letters and evetually graduated into the face to face matters,

Jesu kristi Nasareti. . . . . . . . Whats up with our postings. . . . . I was busy composing mine when you dropped/submitted yours, our beginning are just the same!!! WTF!!!

i liked this girlfriend of mine so much and assumed she did like me. When I approaced her, she told me she does not know. As a result of that lesson, i decided to start telling guys and babes about romance at romance gist so that they willl not lose someone dear to them

LWKMD ROTFLMFAO . U guys r sooo 4ny. My hallmates r beginin 2 thnk dt av gon crazy. I always fil 4 u guys u knw, it takes a lotta courage 2 b man enuf 2 walk up 2 a lady. Ds jst rminds of 2de. I noticed dt ds guy was goin whereva I went pretendn 2 b buyn sumthin until we got 2 my house n all he cld do was 2 start shivern n gibberin. I pitied him so much nt dt I liked him. I jst gav im a reassurin smile dt all was ok. Sum guys c me as 'a hard 2 get' like u'v gt 2 av d liver 2 walk up 2 me. I dn't knw y

lol heheheheh u have never seen anything. i called some chic up and started singing faze's butterfly for her. unknown to me she had put her friends and mine on a conference call to listen to me.the next day one guy saw me and started laughing he was like all her friends were laughing and stuff, i was embarrassed, angry, shocked all at the same time. got over it and just moved on

i was @ a camp&den i can't ask a lady out.i later av it in mind 2 giv it a try.i notice a girl which i av in mind 2 approach luckily 4 me she notice me.bt i was afraid 2 aproach her.she also knw i av somtin in mind.wen she is wit her frnd&she notice me.she leaves deir mist&stay alone xpectin me 2 com.bt i was so shy dat i just luk at her&laugh.on d last dy of d camp she came 2 my side bt i was just afraid.i just watch her packin her loads.poor me

easy. so this happened in uni. My best friend James and I had a fight. We weren't talking to each other.  Just before we went to class this retarded dude, started causing trouble, so James gave it to him (u know cussed him and all). There were like crowds of people watching. I went to give James a high-five and I shout HIGH FIVE BRO, with my hand reeeeal high and he just walked away. SSOOO EMABRASSING. Remember guys, there's nothing worse than a rejected high five in public.  And someone i, liked was there

I came to do my MBA in the USA in 2008.o men there waz dis lovely Nigerian american babe in one of my classes and we were both attracted to each other.well few days b4 our final class together,i vowed to tell her how i feel and want her.Meanwhile,it was winter time here and your bros was coughing with occasional running nose! Can u believe at the exact moment i wanted to 'play my auto tune' to dis chick, one heavy thunder-like cough from no where just manifested via my mouth!Peopleletes,i had to change my discussion to talking about our forth coming exams cos 'warri no dey carry last'

@ J.jay, abeg your eyes and knife.Are u in Jos? That scare only non-Jos residents though.Haha

I cldnt remember and am sure they happened.Those are the only way to be strong.No na one hand and half hand with cheese. Again ladies don't want a rookie at work but I suggest we pay those we use to perfect and steady this game.

E easy to toast babe?
@topic, yet to. . . .
@cyberfreak, are u still a student @ uniben?

homerac7:

d babe luke cute. d waka, na die. na him i walk up come start dey throw my jokers for pigjin wth d xpctatn say na d hand wey d babe go take respond na him go detemin my level of grammar. d babe jst dey smile, me self i dey happy say i dey try hard. finally na him d babe stop okada come open mouth nack grammar, "is it went ?" nna, my shoulder fall yakata, na me xcuse myself with lafta commot there

LWKMD

AYODEJI4LOVE:

i was @ a camp&den i can't ask a lady out.i later av it in mind 2 giv it a try.i notice a girl which i av in mind 2 approach luckily 4 me she notice me.bt i was afraid 2 aproach her.she also knw i av somtin in mind.wen she is wit her frnd&she notice me.she leaves deir mist&stay alone xpectin me 2 com.bt i was so shy dat i just luk at her&laugh.on d last dy of d camp she came 2 my side bt i was just afraid.i just watch her packin her loads.poor me

I experienced exactly the same thing many years ago.That was how I lost the girl till date.
I be proper weaklin in those days as far as girls are concerned.But e be like say na IGBOBI COLLEGE BOYS CAUSE AM SHA eventhough queens college girls and methodist girls no dey allow us concentrate,

1 time after JAMB exams, then i was in SS2; it was somewhere in 1 of these primary schools off Adeniran Ogunsanya in s/l. . . . managed to summon liver top step up to a certain dame i'd been eyeing alll thru d exam. I'd barely managed to get thru d prelim rounds of intro like "Hi, my name is *****" & stuffs like that; then i went brain-dead. . . . it was like NEPA just turned out the lights in my head. For like 3mins, i was stone-cold, d babe just roundly ignored me & when i finally found something 2 say, guess what it was. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . "u look like my cousin, even though i haven't seen her!"

Till today i still ponder what it was i was trying to say or why!!!??

Where have i been?! Watching my dear team get knocked out. Well, its all good. I cant help but continue laffin about d experiences i've heard here. Keep it coming guys. D girls are shy to tell us about when they once freaked out.
@Cyberfreak, can u pls tell me? I'm referring to ur last post.
@sofeco, guy why u dey drag cyberfreak with me na?

I used to be part of a four man gang in my secondary school days that went about embarrassing ladies, it was a silly thing to do, we did it for fun, and i guess that pretty much built my confidence afterwards.

mine ws pathetic,dere is dis gurl in ma str,she is prety,i felt i culd get ha sinc am a graduat waitin 4my nysc.i invitd ha ova 2tantaliza,wen she cam,i askd ha wat she wuld tak &she said la casera,i said 4wat,i went 2d counter,orderd 4two plate of fridrice &1chivita,got 2cups &pourd d chivita 4ha.den she askd me,y did u cal me here,i said i want u 2b my girl.she just stood up &left d plac.i wan die,bt man no slack,i chop d2 plats.na my moni.

U guyz 're funny, i've learnt a lot

kenoka:

mine ws pathetic,dere is dis gurl in ma str,she is prety,i felt i culd get ha sinc am a graduat waitin 4my nysc.i invitd ha ova 2tantaliza,wen she cam,i askd ha wat she wuld tak &she said la casera,i said 4wat,i went 2d counter,orderd 4two plate of fridrice &1chivita,got 2cups &pourd d chivita 4ha.den she askd me,y did u cal me here,i said i want u 2b my girl.she just stood up &left d plac.i wan die,bt man no slack,i chop d2 plats.na my moni.

i lyk ur style bt seriously datz nt d end of d story abi?

This thread ought to be moved to the jokes section cuz it's just too funny


I've never really had an embarassing toastin experience. The closest to that was in my ss3 when I was made the headboy. I called the gal after dining and after the whole blah blah blah I told her that I would like us to be friends even though we were already friends. The gal was busy drawing the map of africa with her feet during this whole time but still told me no despite all my display. I later mustered enough courage and went to her house and can u believe that for over four hours with her I still couldn't tell her my feelings. 3 & half of those four hours were spent in silence while we spent the remaining time playing encarta games. I know tnis girl diggs me but anytime I bring love issues she shuts the door. But I Still love her

Back then in uni, there was this light skinned slim girl, pretty girl but MEAN. my friends and i were "birds" watching when she stepped into the scene with her friend, she was walking to get something to eat. my friends urged me to go say something to her. gash,, man, i walked up to this girl, said hi , and froze. the girl turned and just stared back. after a long wait like 1 min ( imagine standing, waiting for a strange to say why he stop u in your tracks) she said " what!, why!, WHAT!, i was able to throw out a silly gibberish, i said " dont u think i could be in luv with u? " she turned around and looked at her friend, they both frowned and produced a loud, ear deafening sigh and walked away.   i froze on that road. it look a bus conductor to get me back to my senses and leave the road.

subsequently, i avoided and actually hide from that girl and her friend, even anybody i know the know till i left Uni.

^^^^ awwww happy ending lol @ sugar in my tea and cocroach in my cupboard

I don't know if I should be saying this but mine is not really embarrassing but a LUCKY ESCAPE

I've never really had any major problem approaching babes.
So I went to 9ja on holiday for Christmas years ago and I saw this chick around my area, and me being me, It was only right at that moment not to let the chance go by. Well, so I thought.

It was around 6pm in the evening and it was getting dark, so as I was approaching her from behind, she turned around swiftly and started shouting "Thief! thief!!!!thief!!!". It was very loud that I had to start running just to get away from her.

To my biggest surprise, as I pulled up to the junction of the street, I saw 3 men pursuing me thinking I was a real thief.
I was sooo scared that I carried on running cos I just panicked. And then I started hearing someone screaming ''tyre! tyre!! tyre!!!''. (As in they should get a tyre to put round my neck). That was when I stopped because it could get worse if I carried on running.

Luckily for me, it was around my area where we lived, so there was one man that recognised me even though I didn't know the man that well and explained to the small gathering that I wasn't a thief that I'm the son of Mr ------- that lived down the street.

They asked why then was I running and I had to explain . . . . . . maynee, it was one of the scariest moments of my life.
I later found out the girl was mugged some weeks before in that area and thats why she had a panic attack.

So guys be careful when you are approaching a babe in the dark from behind.

Mine getz worst evryday cos i'm ugly n gurlz lyk dia man handsome,so u now knw y mine is occasionally.

Ok, here goes.

I was attending JAMB lessons at Prevarsity back in the day. There was this really cute chick and every guy in the class kept scheming and strategizing to get her. Believe me, we postulated all sorts of theorems and hypotheses without anyone having the liver to do the deed.

Meanwhile, the babe always sat in the front row and paid attention to the instructor. She didn’t even notice that the sight of her innocently raising her pen to her lips was causing several aspiring jambites to experience palpitations.

One day, after several hours of prodding by my “friends”, I decided to step up. I waited till break time and walked up behind her just as she was packing up her books. I raised my hand and tapped her shoulder.  She turned around with an inquiring look and when I saw her eyes up close, my carefully rehearsed lines fled instantly. The babe’s eyes were captivating behind her glasses and I was completely lost.

I struggled for words but none came and after what seemed like an eternity, I said “you have really lovely eyes”. At this point, I was producing adrenaline like I’d just run a 100 meter dash.

Would you believe that the girl didn’t understand the sentence? She said “my what?” I said “eyes”. The babe still didn’t understand. She asked “ears”? I said “no, your eyes”.

By now, my confidence had evaporated and I was getting dizzy from holding my breath for so long. I mumbled something and walked out of the class. Till today I wonder if I was shaking so much that my words were muffled or if the babe simply no dey hear English. 

aisha2:

Mine was the most embarassing toasting i ever got. We were friends for a long time and i guess he did not have the liver to come and ask me out so he went to drink to get the courage. He came to my house, My mom and Dad were at the dinning table we were at the sitting room, he started stammereing and next thing just vomited on me and all over our parlour, then Fainted, See confusion, the vomit smelled of alchohol, Na wa oh, see me and my parents trying to revive him amdist cleaning vomit. Kai, good times, My Father reminds him till today that he had to change our carpet to tiles cos of him to prvent reoccurance

now that was funny and to think u still married him, girl u get heart!

Very funny experiences. Can't remember any embarrassing experience sha. Always do my homework before approaching a girl.

as for my embarrassing toasting experience, now which one should i share, chai, man pikin don suffer! anywho, let me at least share this one. contrarily to popular belief, i am not a guy that runs after anything in skirt expect if that thing in skirt dey find my trouble ooo! back in the good old days of secondary school in abuja, i had a neighbor that just got back from abroad (where i grew up, most families where always on a transfer in and out of the country by the government, either as diplomats or some professional bull crap!). this chic named feyi was in my class and i totally ignored her and most girls in the class at that time. one time we wrote a test and i had just finished mine and was going to submit it to the teacher but decided to quickly scan through it to make sure i didnt make a mistake only for this girl to look at my paper and told me i didnt spell a particular word right, i believe that word was "LUMBERJACK"; instead of just admitting and thanking her for pointing it out to me, i shunned her telling her i knew the spelling was wrong that i just wanted to test our teacher and see if he will know the difference. she laughed and said yea right with her sexy accent. as God would catch me, she told me to correct it and write the right spelling, with gra gra i went ahead to spell the word again and still misspelled it! and she laughed again and she wanted to spell it out for me but i said no! at that the same time i was raising my head from my desk in anger and looking at her direction when our eyes met, omo, see fire! she had these extremely gorgeous eyes i never noticed b4 and her smile was just out of the world. mumu me, i gave her my paper and she took my pen and spelled the word correctly for me on my sheet. from that time i wouldn't just get her out of my mind and we became friends and she invited me over to her house. i went home and decked up nicely to meet her at the appointed time at her place and had all my lyrics set to win her over. i walked down to her place, climbed upstairs and knocked on her door, her 2 massively huge brothers came to answer the door at the same time, when i saw them, my confidence jump from upstairs to downstairs and left me hanging. i would not say a word not even her name, the kind of fear that caught me when i saw them was uncanny. for some reason they knew i came to see their kid sister and one held me by my shoulder and asked for my name which i managed to mutter to him. he led me to the living room and offered me a sit. the girl was called and when she came, i was shaking all over and trying my hardest to keep still knowing the 2 pair of terrifying eyes were watching me. she smiled that gorgeous smile again with those sparkling eyes but for some reason i couldnt still say a word. in fact, we had a wordless date. she ended up putting on a cartoon for us to watch and when the cartoon was over, i told her i wanna go home. once i was out of their house i ran, phew! the following monday when we met in class, she acted like i never made a fool of myself and she was all sweet and all, so we got talking again but i never went to her house again until after secondary school. i cant really explain what happened to me but i can assure u all that rehearsal i did b4 the date with all those lyrics failed me big time and my whole system shut down.  

u guz are funny my is dat am alwaz scared

Mine was in New Hampshire. I was about 16 yrs old and we went to this one popular beach (me my uncle and my cuz). My uncle was like 25yrs old then- - - same age as my cuz. Anyways, they started  gassing me up telling I dont know how to holla at chics bla bla bla. They told me to prove them wrong.  Then they pointed out this Latina chic for me to go talk to. I was sweating  but I played it off and sauntered off to where the chic was standing. As I approched, Baby gal started to smile so I was like "I got this". Son, I started spitting some fire lyrics. Hot game galore!!! lol. The girl just kept smiling and laughing. I look ova and my uncle and cuz r impressed. Then this other gal walks up in the middle of the convo and introduces herself to me as the cuz of the gal I was trying to bag and tells me "SHE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOURE SAYING!!! SHE JUST CAME FROM MEXICO TWO WEEKS AGO!!! SHE SPEAKS NO ENGLISH!!! Geez, all the rhymes I spit just wasted on a non-english speaking chic! All my rhymes just out the window like that!!! Ah, I felt defeated! When was I gonna get the confidence to holla like that again?!!?lol. I never told my uncle or cuz what happenned. They thot I did a good job cus they saw her smiling and they saw me collecting her number! Oh well. . . . .

OMG! I ve been lafin convulsively reading from one post to another. . .honestly, most of the funny posts feel me with a pang of nostalgia for my ol sec sch days in St Finbarr's College. . .I dont realy consider many of my experiences in wooing the opposite sex as embarassing per say. . . Though I went to an all boyz sec sch, I manage to somehow have many female friends, i had friends in many of the gals' sec sch in Yaba-Sabo Oyinbo and Surulere axis,from Anglican galz, QC, OLA, ISL,methodist girls,surulere gurls high sch to even Gideon in Okota. . One thing I learnt early abt wooing chicks is to have as many female friends as possible, that way they help U create avenues for getting their friends. Seriously, no gal likes to be around a guy that is hardly seen with a gal and very nice. . Hahahaha. . U will end up being their good friend and that is where it will end. . Hahahahaha. . However, i have had cause to be embarassed not by any cold response from the gal or a lack of what to say due to some adrenalin rush but the total lack of confidence in the gal I was toasting but that would be for my next posting. . Meanwhile make I laf. . .

bk/babe97:

Mine was in New Hampshire. I was about 16 yrs old and we went to this one popular beach (me my uncle and my cuz). My uncle was like 25yrs old then- - - same age as my cuz. Anyways, they started  gassing me up telling I dont know how to holla at chics bla bla bla. They told me to prove them wrong.  Then they pointed out this Latina chic for me to go talk to. I was sweating  but I played it off and sauntered off to where the chic was standing. As I approched, Baby gal started to smile so I was like "I got this". Son, I started spitting some fire lyrics. Hot game galore!!! lol. The girl just kept smiling and laughing. I look ova and my uncle and cuz r impressed. Then this other gal walks up in the middle of the convo and introduces herself to me as the cuz of the gal I was trying to bag and tells me "SHE DOES NOT UNDERSTAND WHAT YOURE SAYING!!! SHE JUST CAME FROM MEXICO TWO WEEKS AGO!!! SHE SPEAKS NO ENGLISH!!! Geez, all the rhymes I spit just wasted on a non-english speaking chic! All my rhymes just out the window like that!!! Ah, I felt defeated! When was I gonna get the confidence to holla like that again?!!?lol. I never told my uncle or cuz what happenned. They thot I did a good job cus they saw her smiling and they saw me collecting her number! Oh well. . . . .

LMAO!