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I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom - Family - Nairaland

Nairaland Forum / Nairaland / General / Family / I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom (33977 Views)

Nigerian Lady Surprises Her Mother After Years Of Not Seeing Her, She's Her Mom' / Lady Shares Stunning Photos with her Mom, But People are Confused Which is Mom / She Told Me A Very Dark Secret, Should I Still Marry Her? (2) (3) (4)

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I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by deanxy: 4:17pm On Feb 13
My fiancee and I have been in a relationship for 5 years now. I met her since she was in secondary school. We both love each other and she is very nice, loving and supportive too.

We have talked and started planning on settling down and that should before the end of the year but I am beginning to have a second thought.

The problem is not my fiancee but her mom. The woman is very nice and welcoming but lately, she did something that I am not comfortable with. Last week she sent me a text asking for financial assistance. That her daughter (my fiancee) is yet to pay her house rent at school and that my fiancee younger brother is yet to pay his registration fee. And so she had asked me to loan her some amount before the end of the month when she will remit it. That she considered me a son and that's why she confided in me. I later sent her SMS that I don't have anything.

I was like why would she asked me for loan when her daughter never asked for one naira in our Five years of relationship? So my fear is, should I marry her daughter, wont she trouble me with further demands? Please is there anyway around this? Please what do I do?

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by babythug(f): 4:19pm On Feb 13
As inappropriate as the request was/is, it's not enough to call off the relationship

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by KpagoGIN(m): 4:20pm On Feb 13
Processing......
Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Donald3d(m): 4:38pm On Feb 13
Even if she needed help , why didnt she use style to ask through her daughter ? sad undecided

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by kmcutez(f): 4:52pm On Feb 13
Let her go. You don't love her.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by FIDELITY24(m): 5:04pm On Feb 13
I understand how you feel but that's not a good reason to quit ur relationship. If you really love the girl you can't just give up on what you both share because of her mom.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Acidosis(m): 5:18pm On Feb 13
Whether you want to marry her or not, there is nothing wrong in rendering help to someone you've dated for 5 years. It's 5 years bruv?! She didn't ask you for money for aso-ebi or food. The money is meant to pay the school fees of the same girl you've dated for 5 years.

If she has never disturbed you for money in the past, then you will be committing a crime against humanity to rebuke or insult the poor woman. Don't read too many meanings until you find real proofs.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Nobody: 6:21pm On Feb 13
deanxy:
My fiancee and I have been in a relationship for 5 years now. I met her since she was in secondary school. We both love each other and she is very nice, loving and supportive too.we are have talked and started planning on settling down and that should before the end of the year but I am beginning to have a second thought. The problem is not my fiancee but her mom. The woman is very nice and welcoming but lately, she did something that I am not comfortable with. Last week she sent me a text asking for financial assistance. That her daughter (my fiancee) is yet to pay her house rent at school and that my fiancee younger brother is yet to pay his registration fee. And so she had asked me to loan her some ammout before the end of the month when she will remit it. That she considered me a son and that's why she confided in me. I later sent her SMS that I dont have anything. I was like why would she asked me for loan when her daughter never asked for one naira in our Five years of relationship? So my fear is, should I marry her daughter,wont she trouble me with further demands? Please is there anyway around this? Please what do I do?

donnaD, wetin you think ?
Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Nigga44: 6:23pm On Feb 13
Maybe her mother had suggested the daughter asking you for the money......., but your girl turned it down cos of shyness or some other reason.


Check if your girl really needs the money and if you can help please do. It's 5 freaking years man!!! C'mon.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by nana228(f): 7:19pm On Feb 13
If this is a deal breaker for you then don't marry her because it's obvious this won't be the last time. Families help out each other, she has never asked anything from you, she's what you want so decide.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Maychang(f): 7:24pm On Feb 13
May God save us from Stingy boyfriends

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by UjuJoan2: 7:44pm On Feb 13
I hate stingy men with a passion, God Forbid!

Shame no even catch you to say no? I just feel so sorry for the girl and her family.

If they were wiser they would flee now that it's still very early.

Tuaaaah!

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by UjuJoan2: 7:48pm On Feb 13
Acidosis:


Whether you want to marry her or not, there is nothing wrong in rendering help to someone you've dated for 5 years. It's 5 years bruv?! She didn't ask you for money for aso-ebi or food. The money is meant to pay the school fees of the same girl you've dated for 5 years.

If she has never disturbed you for money in the past, then you will be committing a crime against humanity to rebuke or insult the poor woman. Don't read too many meanings until you find real proofs.

This is quite surprising. I half I expected you to jump on the parade and curse women as gold diggers.

Thank God for little mercies!!!

I get really really angry when I read posts like this. As if marrying him is some kind of achievement. For God's sake can't he help out someone in need for the sake of being nice, talk more of his prospective in-laws?

I'm tempted to get the poor woman's account number and give her the money myself to avoid further insult from this yeye man. Arrant nonsense!

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Acidosis(m): 7:58pm On Feb 13
UjuJoan2


angry angry angry tongue

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by kmcutez(f): 8:13pm On Feb 13
UjuJoan2:
I hate stingy men with a passion, God Forbid!

Shame no even catch you to say no? I just feel so sorry for the girl and her family.

If they were wiser they would flee now that it's still very early.

Tuaaaah!

I pity the poor girl. I wish she was a nairalander so she can be advised to leave him. This guy is stingy. Kai.

I still pay the school fees of the children of the families that wrecked me, talk less of someone you have dated for five years and are planning to marry.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by boldx(m): 8:21pm On Feb 13
Maychang:
May God save us from Stingy boyfriends
This guy is so stingy. He feels he is too rich to get married to this lady.

Your ego is really annoying. Who cares about your money.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by UjuJoan2: 8:31pm On Feb 13
Acidosis:




angry angry angry tongue




Lol wink

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by UjuJoan2: 8:32pm On Feb 13
kmcutez:


I pity the poor girl. I wish she was a nairalander so she can be advised to leave him. This guy is stingy. Kai.

I still pay the school fees of the children of the families that wrecked me, from hero to zero. Hundreds of thousands for each child per term. Talk less of someone you have dated for five years and are planning to marry.

If only she could see this post, so she could know just how little the guy thinks of her.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by busky101(m): 9:20pm On Feb 13
Hmmm
Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by BruncleZuma: 9:20pm On Feb 13
Ngwa marry the mother nah...

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Nobody: 9:21pm On Feb 13
Juve is currently teaching Tottenham a lesson of their lives

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by StarUp(f): 9:21pm On Feb 13
Op, pray this prayer point: "every spirit of stinginess that is about to rob me of something big, die by fire"... The girl nor her mum has not begged you for a dime in five years and the first time in five years that the mum says you should "lend" her money, you say no? If you have the money lend her, because it may even be that she is just testing you and do you want to later discover you failed a test because you were stingy?

*By the way everyone knows that the economy isn't smiling on most people presently so anyone can ask for financial assistance from anywhere.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by freecocoa(f): 9:23pm On Feb 13
This isn't enough reason to not want to marry someone, are you sure you love said fiancee at all?

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by Nobody: 9:23pm On Feb 13
Marry both of then na.. So that you can teach the mother a lesson through the daughter..
Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by JamaicanLove(f): 9:24pm On Feb 13
One word.. or maybe two words.. BROKE AND IGNORANT. because them done dey demand money from your hand.. you want come call off the wedding. Better sense you no get. Its obvious you never really loved her. You be correct LEECH.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by akeentech(m): 9:24pm On Feb 13
BruncleZuma:
Ngwa marry the mother nah...
Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by faceURfront(m): 9:24pm On Feb 13
I pity the poor woman. I can't imagine how bad she would feel. She might have contemplated asking for the help or not and having summoned the courage to ask and be turned down in that manner will be really disheartening.

Even though you don't owe her anything, bros you no try! Imagine your response 'I don't have anything'. Sounds very casual and irresponsible to me.

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by fatymore(f): 9:24pm On Feb 13
If for 5yrs you have never given your gf money except she ask for it.. You are the stingy type.. It seems you have or you are pretending to have but you don't give that's why you were approached in that manner. Though you are not financially obligated to the lady but Atleast you should know if she has paid or not ...

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by freecocoa(f): 9:25pm On Feb 13
grin grin grin
UjuJoan2:
I hate stingy men with a passion, God Forbid!

Shame no even catch you to say no? I just feel so sorry for the girl and her family.

If they were wiser they would flee now that it's still very early.

Tuaaaah!
grin grin grin

How I've missed this.

8 Likes 1 Share

Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by brainpower(m): 9:25pm On Feb 13
You date a woman for 5years without her or her mom asking you for nothing, mean while you might have been having sex with her for 5years, they were all good.


As soon as her mom asks you for money for the first time in 5years to pay your "fiancee's rent you decide not to marry again.

You don't deserve that girl. You are one of the reasons women say men are bad. You are a bloody stingy motherf**ker. What's wrong in paying your fiancee's rent?

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Re: I Want To Marry Her, But I Am Having A Second Thought Because Of Her Mom by thorpido(m): 9:25pm On Feb 13
It's not enough to call off the relationship.I think you should ask your fiancee if she currently has financial challenges and in what ways you can help.
You can give the money but be cautious.

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