justmi1:
your mum loves you. You want to enjoy life till 28- more like you want a bore hole drilled under you first. Then later you go dey find innocent man for Shiloh. Come here... I promise... i won't slap you.

sharraaappp. Let us live our lives. If we happen to meet a guy on the way, great! Keeping your options open is what most 23 year olds do. But I’m not going to kill myself because I haven’t found my husband yet. Jesus

Sharpshooota:
African culture is flawed

This can't happen in the west

African culture is so flawed that Africans can't seem to make any significant progress. All other continents are making some strides except Africa. Very horrible place and the butt joke of the entire world.

dasparrow:


Wrong. My cousin gave birth to a set of healthy quadruplets at over 50. She had 3 boys and one girl. She had them via c-section.

Secondly, not every married man and woman wants children. The reason why married Nigerians give birth to children whether they want kids or not is because of societal pressure and getting mocked if one does not give birth.

Go to sane advanced climes and see happily married couples who never wanted kids living their lives as they please, traveling the world, working in ministry, etc. Others have their dogs and cats making them happy. The Nigerian factor has everything to do with Nigerians considering kids as an integral part of marriage.

The sad part though is most Nigerians suck at parenting. This is why they keep raising criminally minded, morally bankrupt individuals who become a nuisance to the world at large. Why do you think citizens from other nations don't like or trust Nigerians?

Your aunty got pregnant at 50 though non natural means . Either through egg donation or IVF. Women at 50 can not get pregnant naturally. Most have either hit menopause, even if the produce eggs, the eggs are useless.

Doctor Sauer says

"Women age 50 and over rarely get pregnant without in vitro fertilization and donor eggs. Just 0.01 percent of all births occur in women over age 47, reports reproductive endocrinologist Mark Sauer "

I agree with the rest of your post.

Stamfordluiz:
I knew she must have made some expensive choice when she had the chance to get married

The only choice she made was deciding not to get married and that is not a crime. I don't know why Nigerians like you don't get it that marriage is a choice and not something you force people into.

I feel ladies should just ignore family, friends, society pressuring us for marriage. As for me, while I was still living single, it got to a stage I don't allow anyone pressure or mock me into getting married. The stubborn ones I cut them off. Weddings of friends I ignore, lol . I simply focus on my work, love life and friends who make me happy, even family sef disturbing me to get married I cut them off, lol.. I don't need such emotional stress Biko.
I pity ladies who get themselves worked up Cos of marriage. I know we all thinking of our biological clock but for me o, what will be will be. I have other pressing issues to disturb my brain on.. Certainly not marriage. Am already in a loving relationship, that's just like been married, the only thing remain na paper work. And we are both happy with what we have going for us.

Do u know because of society pressures, some women end up marrying wife beaters, ritualists and con men. I know of a lady who got married due to pressures to a ritualist. No one knew the man was planning to kill her and renew his wealth. They wedded in a big way. Everyone was happy and saying at last. She married at 32.
Within two Months into the marriage, we heard she's dead. The husband said he came back from work, met her lying dead on the floor. Just like that.
That's how her matter end. Parents cried uncontrollably but shes gone.

Another one, she brought her fiance home to meet her parents, after much pressure. They like the guy gentle looks, after meeting her parents, it's now the guy turn to take her to his parents, whom he claimed lives outskirt of Lagos. They went together. She's meant to come back 2days later. The second day, mum called her phone, it's switched off, the 3rd day still switched off and she's not back from her fiance parents place. They began to panic. One week, she's still not back and phone off. The dad had to report to police station, no one knows where he lives. He gave the parents fake address. All hell was let loose.

Last last, someone on their street saw this lady at Ibadan expressway, half naked running up and down by the side of the road.. She has turned into a mad woman. The neighbor who saw her, quickly alighted from the bus and screamed her name, she didn't recognize him, he was just crying, he quickly brought his phone and called home, tell his friends to go to the girl's parents house , that he has found their daughter and she's now Raven mad . The parents came, shedding tears, cursing the guy whom she brought home., covered her body and tied her up. She is locked up in her room, receiving treatment . Up till date she's still not OK. It's going to 3years now, still locked up.

So single ladies let nobody, no family ,no friend push u to your destruction and death. It's not worth the wahala. Be careful. Be wise.

Stamfordluiz:
And you call a woman of fifty years a lady

Now I am convinced that most Nigerians are illiterates. The dictionary defines lady as:

"a woman (used as a polite or old-fashioned form of reference."

But then again since you come from a chauvinist society like Nigeria, I don't expect you to know that the term "lady" is a polite way of referring to a woman irrespective of her age.

MrBrownJay1:




the reason some women (and also men) commit suicide is because of narrow minded people like the above. to them, a woman above 40 is useless to marry, and marriage is solely about having children (and certainly not about wanting to spend the rest of your natural life with someone). then we wonder why an educated woman would commit suicide?! THEY are the reason why, THEY should be blamed, and funny because these are the same people who would be against abortion but then reject adopting a child!

these people, along with rubbish religion, failed governance and deluded society, are the reason Nigeria is going backward

You will live long. Thank you.

dasparrow:


African culture is so flawed that Africans can't seem to make any significant progress. All other continents are making some strides except Africa. Very horrible place and the butt joke of the entire world.

When i was reading Mrbrownjay1 posts on this thread i was saying to myself; "Hmm...this person sounds exactly like Dasparrow" and now here you are

tintingz:
There are women that doesn't fancy marriage(due to traumatic experience they had) and they are living well, someone like Oprah Winfrey is an example.

Well said.

franchasng:
You know the problem with some of you Nigerians Because you managed to flee out of Nigeria due to frustration, to one European or American or even Asian country you live most times as illegal migrant or through visa lottery or ill-gotten migrant visa or permit or citizenship, whatever...you now assume you know everything that happens in the west.

I speak with my clients on phone, sometimes we do video call on skype....even Hangout, and some are even my friends on Facebook as I type....this is something I have been doing for close to a decade before I stopped for security reasons involved, and you are here talking thrash!

I have been contacted by a popular Australian entertainer being frustrated by her lover, I have helped uncountable women around the world with marital issues, some having issues with finding a man to love and marry....I am not here to brag, I hate talking about this but people like you coerce one to do so....stop living life on assumption....you don't know everything happening in the western nations okay People are different there....yes most of their parents don't pressure them, some parochial and mundial western parents still pressure their aging daughters to get married just as some western parents don't like when their children turn homo or gay....again, speak for yourself and people you know.

I don't argue what I am not very much aware of...on this very topic, I am arguing based on my personal experience and encounter not based on assumption or hearsay...so speak for yourself and those you know okay

And I maintain, not everyone desires marriage same way not everyone desires singleness. There are people out there who are not married but are not alone either. They are in long fulfilled relationships with their partners.

I for instance detest sex so being married will be a nightmare for someone like me who does not desire to swim in another person's genital fluids or secretions. So I intend not to get married. And even if I had desired marriage, I will not marry from that backward continent called Africa that the world never takes seriously.

I don't mingle or socialize with Nigerians in real life so they won't have the chance to pressure me into a union I genuinely don't desire. Not all women or men desire marriage and that is the bottom line. Forcing a person into marriage can have dire consequences. Take it or leave it!

tintingz:
There are women that doesn't fancy marriage(due to traumatic experience they had) and they are living well, someone like Oprah Winfrey is an example.

Oprah Winfrey has been in a committed relationship for over 30years with a man called Stedman Graham

Saff:
sharraaappp. Let us live our lives. If we happen to meet a guy on the way, great! Keeping your options open is what most 23 year olds do. But I’m not going to kill myself because I haven’t found my husband yet. Jesus

lol, I didn't say you must marry at 23, I mean if you get someone you love at 23, why not get married. She sounded like she still wanted to flex till 28 even if a man proposes earlier.

The parents never killed her; foolishness did.

justmi1:
lol, I didn't say you must marry at 23, I mean if you get someone you love at 23, why not get married. She sounded like she still wanted to flex till 28 even if a man proposes earlier.

okay better

Saff:
sharraaappp. Let us live our lives. If we happen to meet a guy on the way, great! Keeping your options open is what most 23 year olds do. But I’m not going to kill myself because I haven’t found my husband yet. Jesus

kongolo:
Oprah Winfrey has been in a committed relationship for over 30years with a man called Stedman Graham

She's not married to him, she's not under any obligations and vows of marriage, they are not husband and wife, they are boyfriend and girlfriend, she's in an open relationship with the man, know the difference.

GODPUNISHUNA:

lol what

Saff:
lol what

Your post is hilarious but true

Who knows, I might just be that PERFECT ONE you've been searching for

dasparrow:


Because she didn't desire marriage but her bloody parents don't want to respect that.

shes a wayword disgrave

Lol,abi my dear,as for me,i stay alone,take care of myself,nd i still need more money in my life,i want to b very comfortable on my own bfore tinkin of marriage,dnt want my kids to pass tru wat i passed tru abeg,,i want to enjoy..cheers!!!!

Saff:
totally relatable. I’m 23 too and my mum is acting like I should get out of her house lol. I’m tryna enjoy my life. Babe we’re still young

Yes,i will not get married until am 27,28,even if i get proposals i will stand by my words,until am comfortable, am nt gonna marry,even if d guy has money,am nt gonna marry him.i want to b okay on my own.dis is MY life nd dats how am gonna do it,so ur opinion dos nt count a kobo

justmi1:
lol, I didn't say you must marry at 23, I mean if you get someone you love at 23, why not get married. She sounded like she still wanted to flex till 28 even if a man proposes earlier.

I tire o

dasparrow:


The only choice she made was deciding not to get married and that is not a crime. I don't know why Nigerians like you don't get it that marriage is a choice and not something you force people into.

GODPUNISHUNA:


Your post is hilarious but true

Who knows, I might just be that PERFECT ONE you've been searching for

first start by showing me your picture. We can go from there

Simplep:
Lol,abi my dear,as for me,i stay alone,take care of myself,nd i still need more money in my life,i want to b very comfortable on my own bfore tinkin of marriage,dnt want my kids to pass tru wat i passed tru abeg,,i want to enjoy..cheers!!!!

I feel you sis

janellemonae:


It's not possible. For a 50yr old to have children. She can carry a child even in her 60's with the help of hormones, but the egg dt was fertilized in the IVF is not hers. Women usually get to menopause around 42-44. After dt their eggs die.

This is where men are lucky. What I would advise anyone dts single and crossing 35 is to freeze their eggs. All fertility clinics do it. If eventually u get married at 45, they'll just unfreeze ur eggs and fertilize it wt ur husband, then u can carry ur child. This is what these older Hollywood women did. Eva longoria, Halle berry.etc.

First you said it's not possible. Then you said it's possible and gave examples of Hollywood women. Where exactly do you stand and where is my statement wrong? The end product is children. You people just want child bearing to be the traditional mama papa fucking process. And that's how many are frustrated to marry total strangers.

authority2006:


Marriage is not a scam, just hope to marry the right partner. Two should be better than one ideally.

Can you give an example of a right partner? Our papas where able to have a right partner in our mamas because of the threats of religion and tradition. Not anymore. Women have opened their eyes to that deception by men and want equality in everything. Expect more divorces in the coming years.

Simplep:
Yes,i will not get married until am 27,28,even if i get proposals i will stand by my words,until am comfortable, am nt gonna marry,even if d guy has money,am nt gonna marry him.i want to b okay on my own.dis is MY life nd dats how am gonna do it,so ur opinion dos nt count a kobo

lol, no vex nau simplep

dasparrow:


And I maintain, not everyone desires marriage same way not everyone desires singleness. There are people out there who are not married but are not alone either. They are in long fulfilled relationships with their partners.

I for instance detest sex so being married will be a nightmare for someone like me who does not desire to swim in another person's genital fluids or secretions. So I intend not to get married. And even if I had desired marriage, I will not marry from that backward continent called Africa that the world never takes seriously.

I don't mingle or socialize with Nigerians in real life so they won't have the chance to pressure me into a union I genuinely don't desire. Not all women or men desire marriage and that is the bottom line. Forcing a person into marriage can have dire consequences. Take it or leave it!

lol, wahala de are u a male or female abeg

Mobilia:


Hahaha...ok. You're ok my brother...you're alright.
You've been quite mature in this whole discussion..so I'll take the one piece of your advice here and leave some of the other lovely info alone

tintingz:
She's not married to him, she's not under any obligations and vows of marriage, they are not husband and wife, they are boyfriend and girlfriend, she's in an open relationship with the man know the difference.

An open relationship is a partnership in which both parties agree to have sexual relations with others while still maintaining their relationship.I repeat,Oprah Winfrey has been in a monogamous relationship with Stedman Graham for over 30years

Saff:
first start by showing me your picture. We can go from there

Trust me, you wouldn't be disappointed when you see my pictures and when you see me face to face.

I'll just let the suspense continue for now

oglalasioux:


Can you give an example of a right partner? Our papas where able to have a right partner in our mamas because of the threats of religion and tradition. Not anymore. Women have opened their eyes to that deception by men and want equality in everything. Expect more divorces in the coming years.

No one will disagree with you on this point.
But then, an example of the right partner is the one you will give everything to get married to again if there is anything like reincarnation.