killsmith:
I should love my wife, a former stranger, who'll likely cheat on me more than my mother, who birthed me and sacrificed everything to see me stand?

Thunder from Zambia fire you and everybody wey dey support this nonsense.

That is how these hoes will get married to you and separate you from your family so that they can enjoy the wealth they didn't work for.....


Smh....

guy head dey pain the guy.

let's look it from this angle, can you love your best friend more than your brother/sister??
the answer is a capital No from me, this doesn't mean that you hate him/she, but the bond/blood is stronger & thicker than you can imagin....

Wife is supposed to be loved more cos u guys will build ur family together. Have kids together and grow old together(ideally un4tunately feminism is wrecking marriage values ). Mothers have brought u to the world and nurtured us now its tym to nurture ours. Mothers should be loved but wife must come first. A wife can destroy a man.

Trizzi:
Twitter user, @RealDreylo is of the opinion that once a man gets married, his primary responsibility is his immediate family not his parents. He went ahead to quote the bible in support of his claims.
[img]https://2.bp..com/-tZ-9X5-0iQw/W35u-NObZ7I/AAAAAAAAEBQ/3PbCk53hoKoFEL-AAph0E7nSjECtaN3WQCLcBGAs/s1600/twi.JPG[/img]
[img]https://3.bp..com/-34a70qpyLDE/W35vD2NUExI/AAAAAAAAEBU/OuDuj7Ppj5At3T0LluPzGIoe3puXshcgwCLcBGAs/s1600/user.JPG[/img]

Source: https://www.mediahelm.com.ng/2018/08/any-man-who-says-he-loves-his-mother.html

This is a sign of joblessness.

pocohantas:
I don't see myself loving any man more than my father and family.

So, I understand men who 'love' their mum a whole lot. The bond is different, the love is different.

Just be diplomatic about it. That's what I plan to do, be diplomatic about it. My kids, my father, then my husband...in that order .

My daughter, mom, and wife(less)

Some men are lucky to have wives that are even amazing than their mothers....Some mothers are just mother cos biology gave them the chance, they are not true mom..

The annoying part is, Some ladies just feel that becos Thier status have change from girlfriend to wife..means that they should take first position in the heart of the man....like wise some mothers feel becos they gave birth u means u must love them more......

For me My mother was my only friend when I had heart breaks with my teenage crushes, my special adviser, my prophet, my pastor, she stand in gap for in prayer when me that need the prayer sleep like pig, she sold all her gold and expensive attire when dad refuse to pay for my fees course he didn't like the course I chose in college..she was everything I can't even begin to mention here... Any wife that wants to take that position is highly welcomed but Mouth Action, and sex at night, or giving birth to my child which are all something u want as well in the first place, won't automatically make me choose u over her if the need comes..I pray that scenario never happens...
I dont want to ever chose...cos I will chose mama and chose her all over again...

pocohantas:
I don't see myself loving any man more than my father and family.

So, I understand men who 'love' their mum a whole lot. The bond is different, the love is different.

Just be diplomatic about it. That's what I plan to do, be diplomatic about it. My kids, my father, then my husband...in that order .

Miss Poco, your way with words on this site has always caught my eye.

It's even sweeter when you're being "diplomatic"

Much love and lespect.

his name already says it all,many are mad but only few are roaming the street, useless mad man

zinnyzee:
It's simply not possible... You just can't compare that love.

All my years on earth, i've lived with my parents and i've seen how my mum treat my brothers. It's something extraordinary, something out of this world. The bond is simply unbreakable.

I wouldn't be surprised if one of them gets married tomorrow and still can't love his wife as much as he loves mum... These stuffs are not of ur own choosing, they simply happen like that nd u gotta take 'em as it is.

so you have done your investigation and you can see the OP is foolish

there may be a second wife but u cant have a second mother.

ur wife can leave u, but ur mother cant.

HeWrites:


Your name really fits you. I guess you fell from the sky,not born of woman.

Love for wife and mother need not be in competition with each other.

The important thing is to give each type of love its own place.

Inugo

his write up was his opinion..Let's leave it at that..Because we might end up crying more than the bereaved..

From the kind of comments am seeing here

I feel like an Alien from Jupiter

For goodness sake your Mother Is your Father's property

While your wife is God's given covenanted partner ... even your Children will eventually leave your house (saw some1 said her love is for her children first before the Husband ... what if you don't bear Children ?) and is only your wife/Husband that will journey with you till end

Nowonder we are having" evil Over bearing mother in laws" every where

killsmith:
I should love my wife, a former stranger, who'll likely cheat on me more than my mother, who birthed me and sacrificed everything to see me stand?

Thunder from Zambia fire you and everybody wey dey support this nonsense.

That is how these hoes will get married to you and separate you from your family so that they can enjoy the wealth they didn't work for.....


Smh....

don't mind the man... i perfectly agree with you...

adontcare:
Tell them

Dnt worry, ur son will get married in future then abandon u jst as u want ur hubby to do to his mum

adontcare:
Tell them

Dnt worry, ur son will get married in future then do same jst as u want ur hubby to do to his mum

killsmith:
I should love my wife, a former stranger, who'll likely cheat on me more than my mother, who birthed me and sacrificed everything to see me stand?

Thunder from Zambia fire you and everybody wey dey support this nonsense.

That is how these hoes will get married to you and separate you from your family so that they can enjoy the wealth they didn't work for.....


Smh....

Most people who agreed to put thier wifes above thier mothers simply never had one before, Even the wife them dey claim undying love to love thier moms more than the husband

pocohantas:


Yes, a NIGERIAN DAD. The best thing to happen to me.
You won't understand how much I love him and my family.

Words can't explain what they mean to me

Daddy’s girl. No cry river for wedding day o

It all depends on how close you are to your mum...For instance a man who did not really experience the sacrifice or love made by his mum will find it more easy and better to love his wife more meanwhile a man who is fully aware of the sacrifices and love made by his mum would not want to love his wife more than his mum...There is a little of sense in what he said and that is because he didn't experience much love and sacrifices from his mum, but in the other way round it is relative...my advice is love both your mother and wife in the same way, because one brought you into this world and the other will bring your children into this world...they both deserve to be loved

You are my colleague, which village weed did u take.
1. Sambisa weed
2. Oshogho weed
3. Kwale weed
4. Ajegunle weed


Cus u r a real mad man

AmazonTopaz:
The man made sense.
Once you are married your spouse and children comes first.Some men would even listen to their mothers instead of their wives on issues that concern the immediate family as if the mother does not have a husband of her own.They would bring their mother into their marriage that is why I cannot marry a mommy's boy.
The love for mother and wife should not be compared or put on the same scale.

So you women don't listen to mommy's advice, Madam my mom comes first, her & my kids are on same level & the wife is slightly below, How can a woman who just saw you with all ur 32 teeth compared to the one who laboured you

not exactly

SmartyPants:


You are simply saying precisely what the young chap said.

they are saying different things:

the part starting from "Honour your father and your mother" was where the OP "young chap" started making a comparison

Waakanda:
Kudos to you... I quite agree with you... 80% of people will disagree with your assertion. Oya, mommas' "shildren", where hath thou?

5 CV Samples written by an HR Expert and loved by many: www..com/cv-samples ... No excuse for not getting your desired job.
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If perhaps you are a woman I pray that your children should abandon you and cling unto their wives as you indirectly so wish for your boyfriend's or husband's mom right now

i wanted to drop venomous and savage response for u but ur name jst calm my rage...y will i love my wife dan my mum..even my gf loves my mum more dan i do, dat shows how special she is

The responses to the Poster's comment gives a clear indication as to why divorce rate has been on the increase and as rightly noted by the Poster, the comments so far comes from a place of immaturity and a bit of lack of attention to details. The poster advised that married men should not love their wives more than their mothers (not that they should hate their mothers) and supported it with a bible verse. If you are not a christian or one who is looking to run a christian home, this post is not applicable to you. If you are a christian and you do not agree with the biblical injunction for you to leave your father and mother and cleave to your wife, you case is clearly different, you will need to determine what your religion is.

The love for one's mother should ordinarily not compete with the love one is to have towards his wife, but where choices have to be made, it will be wise to make choices that will preserve your home. Your mother loved you, you should at least love your children too. There is no greater love you can show your children than to make sure that they grow up in the right atmosphere ( a peaceful home where their mum is valued and not considered a former stranger and inferior to grandma). When your wife was being courted, did you make it clear to her at that point that the best she can ever be in your life is a second fiddle and that your true love and loyalty will remain only with your mum?

If your mother truly love you, she will understand the need for you to have a happy home and she will be willing to concede a bit of your attention and affection to your wife. She will even be willing to accept a bit of 'insults' or ignorant disrespect just to make sure your marriage works.

I once heard a christian man tell me that his wife, which he sent out, will not return to his home unless his mother is pleased with her ( she was not respectful enough). So now, the man his without a wife because he chose to make his mother happy. His children are out of his home because he loves his mum and is wife being out of the home pleases her. He is happy now living alone with his happy mother catering for him, probably masturbating away at night and tracking his children on social media. What kind of mother will even allow his son choose her over his wife? You should ask your self, what is at stake, for your family ( your children, your personal fulfillment and speed in life) if you love your wife more than your mother? I can tell you that your future, your family life and the future of your children is at stake if you choose your mother's happiness over that of your wife.

These unusual love for mothers that makes men push their wives out stems from inherent problems in the homes. The mother was treated as a second fiddle by a man who loved his mother more, so she poured all her love and affection on her son who will treat his own wife the way his mother was treated and the wife too will shift her love and attention on her son.. and the cycle continues. I doubt if any man whose father truly loved his mother would ever think twice about whether or not he should love his wife more than his sufficiently loved mum. Check it, most of these 'I love my Mum' campaigners are from dysfunctional homes (raised by mum alone or in a loveless marriage).

Let the mothers reserve their love for husband, let their sons love their wives and protect them like their fathers did to their mothers. This is healthier, otherwise, your wife can never stand a chance when placed side by side your Mother, it is not fair to bring any woman into such situation, particularly as you got her into the marriage claiming that you love her.

Marry a woman that truly loves you and she will care about everything you love, including your Mum. Your home is hers, not your Mum's. Your heart is hers, not your Mum's and your future is definitely hers, not your Mum's. Both of you will care for your Mum until she is gone. She will cry more than you when your mum is gone, and at that critical time, you will find true solace in her bossom. She is your future Mum if you love her enough to win her love.

The kind of comments on this thread shows nairaland is filled with kids .

Barristter07:
The man isn't saying a man should abandon his mother, Only a foolish man will do so, the key message in that post is " PRIORITY " . If either the wife or husband prioritize their parents than their partner. , the marriage bond is doomed . There are matters that should not even go beyond the two of them which they will carry to their parents and before you know it, their advice as imperfection can ruin it's ugly heads may cause further troubles or in some instances some parents start to broadcast the issue and to exaggerate; the matter will appear on NTA .


Some boys can't make decision until they call Mama , and ( being human she would give advise that will favour her own interest as against the wife )

Likewise some Girls will carry small matter and cry to their mum ( being human she also will want to protect her daughter at any cost even if it means dishonoring the man) , before you know it, a small issue has escalated to a big one.

carrying matter to mum isn't love. it is indecision. The OP was talking about love.

Love for parents is Storge and comes naturally. Love for wife starts from Eros, then dies or morphs into Agape (if the couple take decisive steps to be selfless) before reaching Storge/Philia where it then comes naturally.

final note: for those of you christians, you are under oath to love your wife.

As for me, the role of mother and wife can't be compared together. Reason being that your wife can cheat on you while your mother cannot cheat on you. Your wife can separate herself from you in the times of hardship. Your mother can never separate herself from you in the times of trouble. So tell me the reason why I should not love my mother? It is not for me to allow it to be obvious that I love my mother as there as ways of doing things.

baldman:
The responses to the Poster's comment gives a clear indication as to why divorce rate has been on the increase and as rightly noted by the Poster, the comments so far comes from a place of immaturity and a bit of lack of attention to details. The poster advised that married men should not love their wives more than their mothers (not that they should hate their mothers) and supported it with a bible verse. If you are not a christian or one who is looking to run a christian home, this post is not applicable to you. If you are a christian and you do not agree with the biblical injunction for you to leave your father and mother and cleave to your wife, you case is clearly different, you will need to determine what your religion is.

The love for one's mother should ordinarily not compete with the love one is to have towards his wife, but where choices have to be made, it will be wise to make choices that will preserve your home. Your mother loved you, you should at least love your children too. There is no greater love you can show your children than to make sure that they grow up in the right atmosphere ( a peaceful home where their mum is valued and not considered a former stranger and inferior to grandma). When your wife was being courted, did you make it clear to her at that point that the best she can ever be in your life is a second fiddle and that your true love and loyalty will remain only with your mum?

If your mother truly love you, she will understand the need for you to have a happy home and she will be willing to concede a bit of your attention and affection to your wife. She will even be willing to accept a bit of 'insults' or ignorant disrespect just to make sure your marriage works.

I once heard a christian man tell me that his wife, which he sent out, will not return to his home unless his mother is pleased with her ( she was not respectful enough). So now, the man his without a wife because he chose to make his mother happy. His children are out of his home because he loves his mum and is wife being out of the home pleases her. He is happy now living alone with his happy mother catering for him, probably masturbating away at night and tracking his children on social media. What kind of mother will even allow his son choose her over his wife? You should ask your self, what is at stake, for your family ( your children, your personal fulfillment and speed in life) if you love your wife more than your mother? I can tell you that your future, your family life and the future of your children is at stake if you choose your mother's happiness over that of your wife.

These unusual love for mothers that makes men push their wives out stems from inherent problems in the homes. The mother was treated as a second fiddle by a man who loved his mother more, so she poured all her love and affection on her son who will treat his own wife the way his mother was treated and the wife too will shift her love and attention on her son.. and the cycle continues. I doubt if any man whose father truly loved his mother would ever think twice about whether or not he should love his wife more than his sufficiently loved mum. Check it, most of these 'I love my Mum' campaigners are from dysfunctional homes (raised by mum alone or in a loveless marriage).

Let the mothers reserve their love for husband, let their sons love their wives and protect them like their fathers did to their mothers. This is healthier, otherwise, your wife can never stand a chance when placed side by side your Mother, it is not fair to bring any woman into such situation, particularly as you got her into the marriage claiming that you love her.

Marry a woman that truly loves you and she will care about everything you love, including your Mum. Your home is hers, not your Mum's. Your heart is hers, not your Mum's and your future is definitely hers, not your Mum's. Both of you will care for your Mum until she is gone. She will cry more than you when your mum is gone, and at that critical time, you will find true solace in her bossom. She is your future Mum if you love her enough to win her love.

Truer words have never been spoken but I still believe this long article Isn't necessary. You should've simply said "the love for your mother should be unlimited, same applies to your wife " .There should be no basis for the comparison between the love a man has for his mom and the love he has for his wife.


Though I disagree with many of parts of your post, men who behave this way have gotten their emotions fvcked up and some end up going the suicide route, I'd advice everybody to thread with caution.

Waakanda:
Kudos to you... I quite agree with you... 80% of people will disagree with your assertion. Oya, mommas' "shildren", where hath thou?

5 CV Samples written by an HR Expert and loved by many: www..com/cv-samples ... No excuse for not getting your desired job.
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we are here

Thank you for the brilliant summary. I have always struggled with summaries especially when I think certain relevant details could be beneficial to my listener/reader

Hanseel1:
Can you however explain how you came about this opinion.. I am a bit lost trying to connect how men who love their wives will tend towards suicide. Please educate me



Truer words have never been spoken but I still believe this long article Isn't necessary. You should've simply said "the love for your mother should be unlimited, same applies to your wife " .There should be no basis for the comparison between the love a man has for his mom and the love he has for his wife.


Though I disagree with many of parts of your post,

men who behave this way have gotten their emotions fvcked up and some end up going the suicide route,

[color=#006600][/color] I'd advice everybody to thread with caution.

ekems2017:
It's better for a man to love his mother cos if a man loves his mother he will definitely love his wife.

Better pikin, infact may good husband that will love more than his life/mother finally locate you there.

Fourwinds:
so you have done your investigation and you can see the OP is foolish

Lols... They didn't hear it from my mouth o