this is interesting

pocohantas:


I am not interested in the first thing she sees, we all see something first, yours might be boobs. I like that she is real about it. Lots of your guys claiming lovers of Miss-independent, will choose a 23y/o slayqueen you can control over a 29y/o miss-independent. We see it happen everyday.

Men look out for youthfulness in a woman, just as women look for a man that can provide. So, let's stop deceiving ourselves. We all want the other for something, most times selfish.

A broke guy can't guarantee peace either. Lots of the guys that demolished vaginas and hearts in the university were all broke with just 2 boxers to their names. Lots of them were even cheating on their gfs. A man that will give you peace, will give you peace, Irrespective of his financial status.

All that we want independent women ends on NL. Outside here, most Nigerian men will choose a dependent woman. It gives them control! They love control!!!

Preach

MariaLavina:
Funny enough op is no different from her friends, so while trying to correct her friend for asking a direct question 'him get money? ' her very own first question was 'his job / career' . Biko what's the difference? Ah! packaging One is direct , the other isn't



Anyways it's none of my business. . Let your standard be whatever it is, it's your cross/ gain to bear.

I asked myself the same question. Wow that's very intelligent of u. OP, ur topic would hv made sense to me if u had not asked whether he has got a job. It still means u are indirectly wat u decry

This question was directed to the females But na Guys day answer pass.

emmaodet:


Ok, about your first answer - what if after 5 yrs, i became ok, nice looking, with a nice car, nice apartment and doing fine. If i now approach you, will you now accept?

About your question - i want approach the ugly woman.

You can't use beauty to compare money, if you want to use money as a variable, use money and if it is beauty, use beauty, don't interpolate.

If we are to go by your logic, then i can approach a lady that is broke if am broke and a lady that is ugly if am ugly

you are getting it wrong. Ladies are valued for their beauty the way men are valued for their abiloty to provide and wealth simple.

Kanoute:


Actually bro you did not get her analogy... She is saying guys are moved by what we see hence the reason why we would not approach a girl who is not beautiful... In the same way, she cannot accept a guy who is not comfortable and well to do making finance her yardstick for consideration....

Even if I don't agree totally with her point of view, But Bros we all have standards in choosing people we talk to, as well as life partners.. Some may be finance, intellectual ability, sense of humour, beauty or whatever... I would not condescend and accept you if you don't meet my standard... I don't expect you to do same when I don't meet yours..

thank you

No wonder. It os only males wothoit strong paternal influence that talk like this

Bamz:

Brilliant comment mate, I echo your sentiments as well.

Omoge87
Girl, I don't who you are, where you're from but you're the kind of woman I pray for. I read every bit of what you wrote.
I'm a very conservative and sensitive person and I can easily tell when/if a girl is profiling me based on my material worth, and when I notice that, I RUN away. I don't need a trophy wife, I need the Pro 31 kind of woman.
Honestly, I've never in my life seen comments like this from a Nigerian (and I'm assuming you're one. Foreign girls think way differently.
I don't date women for their bodies, I look for deeper qualities in them, and so in my just opinion, I think I deserve someone who thinks the same way.



You're a numpty saffi and I say this without reservation and I'm usually a polite person. You're the kind of girl my momma warned me against. You started your response in a very sensible way but rounded it up like a dolt. She made very important remarks which you failed to address.

No matter how independent you are, you can accept assistance from a man regardless of if he’s your husband or not as long as he is wholeheartedly willing to do so. - She says she DOES not refuse offers for help but it depends on the magnitude.


If someone helps you willingly why would they expect you to pay them back if things don’t work out? - Girls who do not demand infact deserve the universe. There is no problem with 'someone' helping. Remember, a relationship is a two-way street and 'helping' is not gender specific. So think of it this way, he has been helping, helping, helping and helping, what exactly is your own contribution? to be the proverbial termite (as per escapefromusa)?
--------------------

I respect people's opinions but don't pull down someone else's opinions just because you feel you have a superior argument.

Scenarios
1. Girls who support men in no way (liabilities) - They want to profile and marry men primarily because of their wealth even as they regard other things as secondary, good for them.

2. Girls who support men as much as they can (maybe working etc)- They want to profile and marry men primarily because of their wealth even as they regard other things as secondary, good for them.

3. Girls who support men as well as they can (maybe working etc)- They don't really care about wealth as much as someone who they truly love and vibe with, to build a future together, good for them.

4. Girls who support men in no way (liabilities) - They don't really care about wealth as much as someone who they truly love and vibe with, to build a future together, good for them.

-----

I wonder if scenario 4 ever happens, as it's the antithesis of scenario 1. Anyways, anyone is free to do whatever they want with their lives.

EDIT.

I think our backgrounds have a major role in this. My mom has always been a pillar in my life. I'm not sure I would be where I am today if she was not working her socks to support her household. So naturally, I would be averse to a girl who sounds lazy.

It's all about our backgrounds to a large extent.

ImaIma1:


That's what people keep saying... still people are getting married constantly and marriages are still growing strong.

Many marriages might be failing but the fact that there are still good ones means there is hope.

you are talking to a bitter MGTOW man who has lack of a good paternal influence while growing up. He also hates women. He doesn't believe in marriage. His goal is to pump and dump and have his children litter the earth through baby mamas.

Don't try to convince him.

funmisticqueen:
No wonder. It os only males wothoit strong paternal influence that talk like this

Yes hun, my paternal influence was remote but it was felt notwithstanding.

Still, it takes nothing away from the fact that the 21st century lady should strive to be independent and forward thinking but I'm not to judge whoever thinks otherwise.

You definitely haven't heard of a gigolo before. A lot of men marry women for money

pansophist:


Yes, but only after men have developed society and she can buy comfort with money. In the pre-industrialized era, you will never see a woman


saying she doesn't need a man. Because when other villages come to wage war, well, you surely do need men. And if war breaks out today, those women that do not need a man will suddenly disappear.

Because men love sacrificially. Civilisation is built, maintained, and sustained by men, for the betterment of all. Known matriarchial civilisation tends to cater to women only, and men seen as an accessory. And feminism even with their lies of equality, it only fights for women interest and turns a blind eye to inequality experienced by men. I have never seen a man that marries a woman because she is a ticket to a better life for him, but the opposite is not the case. Instinctively, men care and sacrifice for women, the opposite is hardly true (unless her children).

SyberKate:
So about 2 years ago when I was still dating my now ex I got a call from a family friend in the US, towards the end of the call she asked me if I was married yet and I said no but was dating someone and she was like "oh that's nice, what does he do" and I replied saying he's an accountant. She went on and said "wow that's great, and is he working" to which I replied yes. And she congratulated me and says "I hope it works out for you two"

Fast forward to today, I was at a Meetup with some old friends and one of my friends, lets call her ladyA was trying to hook up another of our friends ladyB who was single.

So ladyA says to ladyB that she has this friend who is single and searching and she believes ladyB will like him. The first thing ladyB says is "him get money" and I was shocked. Him get money, seriously that's the only thing that concerns you. You don't care if he has a job or a career, or a Christian or Muslim. If from a good family background you didn't ask any of that. But it didn't end there, so I forgot to mention we are 4 in ladies in this Meetup. So the forth lady, I'll call her ladyC now cuts in and says "what car does he drive? because me too I'm interested"

And I started doing some maths, we are 4 in a group and 2 of them only cared about material things to mortivate them to date a guy, that's 50%. Is that 50 percent or even more of Nigeria ladies think this way.

Now compare this to what I said in the beginning, my family friend in the US only cared about my guy potential, what he does.

I think I have said enough for now so my question is Nigerian ladies why don't you care about the guys with potential anymore?
Why do you think so much about material things and not what are more important.

The floor is open, oya start dropping your comments or excuses

This is the major problem I am having with ladies. Material things. I have decided to stay away from them but I am weak. One day I will have to marry and that is one of my fears. The problem is they love pleasure more than God. And that will eventually lead to their doom.

Bamz:


Yes hun, my paternal influence was remote but it was felt notwithstanding.

Still, it takes nothing away from the fact that the 21st century lady should strive to be independent and forward thinking but I'm not to judge whoever thinks otherwise.

you can't give what you don't have

tunize:

can we simply jst sey social media or rather technological development seems to have caused more harm than good? i believe years back orientations like this were not that common, but seems what was suppose to be a thing of value to mankind seems to be "if not a major problem" to mankind.
well, dem really sey if eye too open na dirty dey enter that is what we are facing now with some females.

True bro.. Everybody is now ten times #Woke in this generation...


Its not just for female's.. If not for greed fueled by covetousness fueled by constantly looking at individuals flaunting uncertain riches on social media, many of our guys would still be engaged in noble profession's.

Many of them would still be humble

Saffi:
No woman has to fuckinng settle for anything. Thank God for social media. So many of my friends in naija are meeting guys from different countries and they’re getting married. I met my boyfriend who used to live in qatar and I live in London, and he’s well to do. It’s so easy to meet a guy based in Abuja if you live in Lagos, thanks to the internet. They’re millions of men around the world, old and young looking for partners. If more women knew this, they wouldn’t have to settle for church rat Ayo from ajegunle. Women just need to broaden their search and think smart.

[sup][/sup]

Saffi:
No woman has to fuckinng settle for anything. Thank God for social media. So many of my friends in naija are meeting guys from different countries and they’re getting married. I met my boyfriend who used to live in qatar and I live in London, and he’s well to do. It’s so easy to meet a guy based in Abuja if you live in Lagos, thanks to the internet. They’re millions of men around the world, old and young looking for partners. If more women knew this, they wouldn’t have to settle for church rat Ayo from ajegunle. Women just need to broaden their search and think smart.

Young lady, go sell your second hand abi second d*ck pussy to the highest bider across the globe. If you like advertise it on pornhub or ebay to attract love merchants but leave the poor Ayo out of your rant otherwise overtime that hungry Ayo, with all your loathing of him and his state/efforts, will leave the church and use your pant or that of your man loating kind to do money ritual to buy the pu*sy of your kind and use for top up.
That rich guy you leave poor Ayo to run to in Abuja may just be a borrow pose, yahoo + or pant ritualist that will eventually use your pant to top up. The street will keep adjusting accordingly. I know where greed has landed many of you.
Female greed induced men loathing will ensure easy steady supply of victims for top up. Just kwuntinue but remember; many have gone!

princfred:


Overtime that hungry Ayo will leave the church and use your pant or that of your man loating kind to do money ritual to buy the pu*sy of your kind.
That rich guy you leave poor Ayo to run to in Abuja may just be a borow pose or pant ritualist that will eventually use your pant to top up. Just kwuntinue. The street will keep adjusting accordingly.

Some folks here just talk anyhow due to their priviledged status especially the one called Saffi. Probably she thinks one would wish to be born in such circumstances.

Raalsalghul:
Some folks here just talk anyhow due to their priviledged status especially the one called Saffi. Probably she thinks one would wish to be born in such circumstances.

Thats the "usefulness" (or uselessness) of better placed Nigerian ladies for you - loathe men and deceive less fortunate ladies. The main lesson for guys here is - dont trust these men hating hoes unless they are richer than you and still show respect because usually they sing a different song when they are better off. With your heart in a long spoon play until they prove themselves and bail fast when they dont.

Raalsalghul:
Some folks here just talk anyhow due to their privileged status especially the one called Saffi. Probably she thinks one would wish to be born in such circumstances.

she is not privileged, she just seems to live in London and claim to have a so-called "well to do boyfriend" who is also taking care of her extended family. these type of women never learn, i wonder when the relationship ends, who next will they go for. most of these type of omen their life always end up in resentment and depression when they cant find a new well to do bf like their ex.

is it not funny, that she claimed to speak the gospel truth thereby dismissing people reality here in Nigeria, she is out of touch with the Nigerian reality and unable to understand the plight of ordinary Nigerians here.

there are thousands of women have been used for rituals in Nigeria just because of their predatory and consumption activities, nobody is trying to educate women that they can do it on their own and stop being dependent but they are here encouraging vices

wetdick:


she is not privileged, she just seems to live in London and claim to have a so-called "well to do boyfriend" who is also taking care of her extended family. these type of women never learn, i wonder when the relationship ends, who next will they go for. most of these type of omen their life always end up in resentment and depression when they cant find a new well to do bf like their ex.

is it not funny, that she claimed to speak the gospel truth thereby dismissing people reality here in Nigeria, she is out of touch with the Nigerian reality and unable to understand the plight of ordinary Nigerians here.

there are thousands of women have been used for rituals in Nigeria just because of their predatory and consumption activities, nobody is trying to educate women that they can do it on their own and stop being dependent but they are here encouraging vices

At the bolded true.

castro316:


Omoge87: I apologize on this man's behalf

Castro, u be mumu o.. U dey take style find entry point.. Go try ur luck lazy boy.. As u don hear say she financially comfortable

[quote author=Omoge87 post=75128159]

Yes I will continue being self-sufficient until God brings my husband my way and even then I will still be self- sufficient - but in a different way. I shouldn’t have to be disturbing my husband for money to buy pant and bra or for aso ebi money for my friends wedding. What’s his own with my friends wedding abi? If I want to waste £150 on my friends aso ebi - why should I be disturbing my husband for such things. Did he send me? If I am working and earn my own salary I can take from it and use it to buy the material - rather than disturb him. And that is what I meant when I speak about independence as a woman. I don’t wish to be a liability on my husband and vice versa.

Things like bills, family holidays, school fees, maybe he has an urgent need or I have an urgent need yes that is different - I can ask him for such things.

The Proverbs 31 wife is the yardstick that they tell use for us women - she was a credit to her husband. She was an asset.

My declining financial help from a boyfriend is personal to me - on this forum a girl having accepted assistance from a guy who has paid her tuition for her education- she has now graduated and is now asking should she marry him even if God has not said just because he helped her ? As in.... and for this very reason is why I will not. If I know I cannot marry a man or I am not sure about him - why then allow him to spend money on me lavishly- invest his time and energy- deprive himself of things for my sake - knowing I may not even marry him. If that is not wickedness then I don’t know what is. Also she may now feel indebted to marry someone she doesn’t want to because he helped her with her education. It is unfair for both of them.

Hence why if you read clearly I said my husband I can accept financial assistance from but Boyfriend I will not. I am not talking about let’s say he wants to help me fuel my car or we go out and he pays for the meal ... that’s fine - I am talking of big financial assistance like him buying me a car, school fees that’s a no no for me- husband yes ... boyfriend no etc....

In reference to your comment about me buying a husband - I don’t know which market they sell husband - but I won’t be going there. My not being married is simply because I am not in a haste. You can rush into marriage but you cannot rush out. Better take your time because divorce costs more than the wedding day ...

Peace out and remain blessed.

[/quote
After all u typed n my perusal....
Its not a wrong thing to accept help or assistance from your boyfriend..
In ur first response, u made it sound like its wrong of a Lady even though ur ideals are r different....
And I feel u r giving men enough gut to think that every women shouldn't ask for n likewise receive assistance from their boyfriend....

PrimadonnaO:
I'll try to be very objective here.

I know there are dumbos, but no sensible girl chooses a man who's got money and nothing else tangible in the mix.
The fact, however, is that women like comfort and luxury... by default. So, in looking for a man to be with, they just can't help but be concerned if he can secure her comfortability...they like to know he's paces ahead of where they are. It's never really money in exclusion of other things. Material things might be secondary, but it can't be left out. If you've got money and you don't have sense or right values, we can't get married. I want kind, thougtful, intelligent, good sense of humour, responsible... but don't be broke! Have a job, potential for growth, and a place to call your own. That's the barest minimum. Anything short of these, nahh, I'm not interested.

If you say that's materialistic, then that's your business.

I hope you also have something to contribute.

ghettochild:

Castro, u be mumu o.. U dey take style find entry point.. Go try ur luck lazy boy.. As u don hear say she financially comfortable

I am not surprised at your comment. so I will just sit back and enjoy the show. Argue with your keypad okay?

funmisticqueen:
you are talking to a bitter MGTOW man who has lack of a good paternal influence while growing up. He also hates women. He doesn't believe in marriage. His goal is to pump and dump and have his children litter the earth through baby mamas.

Don't try to convince him.

Lol...I know his way.

SyberKate:

My dear see your life.
And what is potential again?
When you say you want something to work with, then that thing has potential
I think you just contradicted yourself

Lol

funmisticqueen:
You definitely haven't heard of a gigolo before. A lot of men marry women for money

Gigolo is a young man paid or financially supported by a woman, typically an older woman, to be her escort or lover. Their interaction is commercial in nature and sustained with monetary transactions. The vast majority of men do not do this and the one that does usually do not marry their mistress. The numbers of gigolos are infinitesimally small that it's statistically inconsequential.

Lol this nairaland na full of write up and lies
Na this same lady they ask for 15k from a stranger she met
Now you post here claiming you are not materialistic
Lol Gold digger
Fake story

You done give your self bad name
Now you one change am lol �

Check her profile before commenting
Gold digger with package lol
Check her profile

Rahyberg:
It's rare to see ladies who won't depends on you for monetary assistance. I really thank God for my galfriend, she Neva ask for a dime, but I knew at least we have to b our brothers keeper.. she believe in my long term goals likewise she is also a career woman. The day I sent her ordinary #500 airtime. I receive call instantly praying like pastor T B Joshua.. Not all ladies are parasitic in nature.

if u hv a good job n you earn more than ur girl!! N u hv only given her 500 naira card!! U really a stingy person

I want a man who is comfortable n can take care of my kids when I start hving kids,, I owe that to my kids!! Mind u, I work and I earn well. I can take of myself n even 4kids in addition!!! But if I get into a relationship n I look at how comfortable he is for me, (a job ofcourse, not fraud)then his way of life, his heart n attitude.

pansophist:


Gigolo is a young man paid or financially supported by a woman, typically an older woman, to be her escort or lover. Their interaction is commercial in nature and sustained with monetary transactions. The vast majority of men do not do this and the one that does usually do not marry their mistress. The numbers of gigolos are infinitesimally small that it's statistically inconsequential.

every man that asks for 50:50 on a date, or in a marriage or ask a woman what she brings to the table is a 50% gigolo. So that is way more than your percieved statistic.

The only women who have the right to look for men who can take care of them are the young, pretty, sexy, and hot girls in their 16-22. Those are the ones who are of value to men! At least if not for any other thing, the sex would be passionate and enjoyable to the man. Again, her chances of conceiving are higher, so the man wouldn't have to spend years in the marriage trying to conceive(all other things being equal). I will do everything to marry a girl within this bracket, even if it means marrying an illiterate from my village.

Not these old women here who still look for men they can leach on. Please if you are a lady above 22, just know that your sexual value has dropped! So, what else can you offer a man in marriage Especially when you don't believe in contributing towards financing the home Of what value would you be to him

No offence...