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Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? - Family - Nairaland

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My Mum Used To Beat My Dad So I Grew Up To Hate Women / I Think My Wife Is A Witch / I Think My Husband Scammed Me (2) (3) (4)

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Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:19am On Aug 20, 2019
Good morning,nlders.

This is going to be a very lengthy post but please read to the end.

Sometime last year my widowed mother met this man who's into oil bunkering who said he was interested in learning about poultry farming and she in turn will learn his. As at then she was doing well she had a poultry business, mobile banking business, and she supplies things to companies.

Now this man is a divorcee with 3boys from his ex-wife and 3kids from two different women, all this children he doesn't train them.

In the guise of learning each other's business they both started dating and somehow he stopped her from staying with we her kids that were at home ( I,17 being the eldest at home then and a jambite, elder ones are in school)
She started living with him, hardly attends to her business because he always wants her home when he returns. He controlled every aspect of her life.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:24am On Aug 20, 2019
.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:24am On Aug 20, 2019
Closed

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:24am On Aug 20, 2019
Your comments and views are encouraged.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Raysleek: 11:36am On Aug 20, 2019
I have one thing to tell you.
You have your life ahead of you and you already are an adult or will soon be one ( I guess)
You have a very good advantage being exposed to managing a business.. And you must have known the in and out of your mum's business.
Instead of focusing on your mum's mistake I think you should try and build your business. You can't be dependent on your mum forever.. There was a time I stopped praying God bless my parents I started praying God bless me so I can take care of my parents you can only learn from your parents mistakes, you might not be able to force them to change.. But one thing you can do is decide not to make the same mistake yourself.. Your mum has made her choices and you have more years ahead of you. Try to grow similar to your mum's business for yourself dear.
I hope this helps

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by greatme2good(f): 11:40am On Aug 20, 2019
Your mum is the cause of her problems and she learnt her lesson the hard way. If you have your way, start a business and not depend on your mum. Still keep encouraging her before she will become depressed, since you are in school always keep in touch with her.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Venusman(m): 11:45am On Aug 20, 2019
You left your Mom in that condition to school at the time she needed you most.

You Mom is a widow and the man knew she needed love (he got into her in disguise). You could have help her out of that mess she called love.

I ain't saying you're wrong to have gone to school but your Mom has greater value too.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by blackboy(m): 11:47am On Aug 20, 2019
No charm. Your mum wont be the first nor the last. Women when they think they cannot be loved and finally find love they can do anything for the man. They dont want to loose the love in fear of never finding love again or being alone again.

The man is a gold digger. There is really nothing you could do. Work on yourself and save your mum by continued talking to her

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:50am On Aug 20, 2019
Raysleek:
I have one thing to tell you.
You have your life ahead of you and you already are an adult or will soon be one ( I guess)
You have a very good advantage being exposed to managing a business.. And you must have known the in and out of your mum's business.
Instead of focusing on your mum's mistake I think you should try and build your business. You can't be dependent on your mum forever.. There was a time I stopped praying God bless my parents I started praying God bless me so I can take care of my parents you can only learn from your parents mistakes, you might not be able to force them to change.. But one thing you can do is decide not to make the same mistake yourself.. Your mum has made her choices and you have more years ahead of you. Try to grow similar to your mum's business for yourself dear.
I hope this helps
. I was doing something small in school, which I was able to use in feeding and buying materials but now we are on break. I'm in Port Harcourt tho job hunting before we resume, left the village I'm staying with a course mate at her parent's.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:52am On Aug 20, 2019
greatme2good:
Your mum is the cause of her problems and she learnt her lesson the hard way. If you have your way, start a business and not depend on your mum. Still keep encouraging her before she will become depressed, since you are in school always keep in touch with her.
I'm beginning to resent her, can't help it.
Thanks for your advice

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:53am On Aug 20, 2019
blackboy:
No charm. Your mum wont be the first nor the last. Women when they think they cannot be loved and finally find love they can do anything for the man. They dont want to loose the love in fear of never finding love again or being alone again.

The man is a gold digger. There is really nothing you could do. Work on yourself and save your mum by continued talking to her
But we her kids were there to show her love,we were supportive.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 11:53am On Aug 20, 2019
Venusman:
None
Everyone keep saying it was charm.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Nobody: 12:03pm On Aug 20, 2019
Where's Lalasticlala sef shocked

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Raysleek: 12:05pm On Aug 20, 2019
Enchantaurl:
. I was doing something small in school, which I was able to use in feeding and buying materials but now we are on break. I'm in Port Harcourt tho job hunting before we resume, left the village I'm staying with a course mate at her parent's.
Try to start up something similar to your mum's business.. If possible use her contact to continue from where she stopped.. And pls don't have a wrong perception about men. There are more fantastic men and women in this world and the good people outnumber the bad. Don't let your past experience make you resentful.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 12:16pm On Aug 20, 2019
Raysleek:

Try to start up something similar to your mum's business.. If possible use her contact to continue from where she stopped.. And pls don't have a wrong perception about men. There are more fantastic men and women in this world and the good people outnumber the bad. Don't let your past experience make you resentful.
I can't start something similar for now, I'm just in 100l + no capital.I just want to work and raise funds then start buying and reselling things in the hostel, because I have to do something that won't distract my education.

Thanks for your advice.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by greatme2good(f): 12:24pm On Aug 20, 2019
Enchantaurl:
I'm beginning to resent her, can't help it.
Thanks for your advice
It's normal to feel that way coz you are human but still don't go too extreme. She needs you now like never before...forgive her, comfort her and never judge her. If you loose her to death then you will know what it means not to have a parent especially a mother.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by seunmohmoh(f): 12:25pm On Aug 20, 2019
She was charmed.. Forgive her.

But how are you guys gonna pay the loan back?

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Nobody: 12:26pm On Aug 20, 2019
This should be a lesson to you as you get older - to be careful who you allow into your life - b|c not everyone who comes into it means well. There were warnings but your mom didn't see them or mistook them for love. His history with women should've been a huge red flag. Him telling her that he wanted to learn her poultry business while she learns his was another! Your mom didn't need him for anything, as her businesses were thriving; he was the one who wanted to rip her off financially and destroy everything she had worked for. Threatening to kill her and trying to break your family apart also shows he was the devil in disguise. It's no surprise that she took out those loans for him, as he was clearly abusive, manipulative and controlling towards her. Learn from this experience as you move forward with your own life.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by bizza45: 12:42pm On Aug 20, 2019
c I know d man ur mum dated was an ass-hole but disrespecting ur late dad on nairaland is d most stupid tin I have read today...

u can hate all men and become a feminist, but that will not pay back d loan ur mum took.. I will simply tell u to forgive d man and pretend that he don't exits anymore,
2, this might b difficult but u need to start hustling with any little amount u have, start something right now or get a job, ur mum can start her poultry in little scale ... I know its capital intensive but she can start with 5- 10 birds and sell dem when they are a a month or 2 months old

lastly d hate in ur heart is like an acid and if care is not taken it will eat u up... this is going to b difficult but learn how to get over it

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by yomi007k(m): 12:43pm On Aug 20, 2019
From the man's history alone there were multiple Red flags-divorcee who doesn't train his kids.
I wish your mum had listened to you.

Paying the loan back. I hope the collateral are not your real estate properties because they will end up taking it.

The deed has been done.

I will just advice you to try and hustle and be supportive as she needs you very much during this trying times.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by generationz(f): 12:45pm On Aug 20, 2019
Enchantaurl:
Good morning,nlders.

This is going to be a very lengthy post but please read to the end.

Sometime last year my widowed mother met this man who's into oil bunkering who said he was interested in learning about poultry farming and she in turn will learn his. As at then she was doing well she had a poultry business, mobile banking business, and she supplies things to companies.

Now this man is a divorcee with 3boys from his ex-wife and 3kids from two different women, all this children he doesn't train them.

In the guise of learning each other's business they both started dating and somehow he stopped her from staying with we her kids that were at home ( I,17 being the eldest at home then and a jambite, elder ones are in school)
She started living with him, hardly attends to her business because he always wants her home when he returns. He controlled every aspect of her life.



How about the loan?/
Has she been able to pay it back?

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 12:58pm On Aug 20, 2019
Venusman:
You left your Mom in that condition to school at the time she needed you most.

You Mom is a widow and the man knew she needed love (he got into her in disguise). You could have help her out of that mess she called love.

I ain't saying you're wrong to have gone to school but your Mom has greater value too.

Really??

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 12:59pm On Aug 20, 2019
generationz:



How about the loan?/
Has she been able to pay it back?
No, I just knew about the loan this month as I came back home from school. She's not started paying.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 1:01pm On Aug 20, 2019
yomi007k:
From the man's history alone there were multiple Red flags-divorcee who doesn't train his kids.
I wish your mum had listened to you.

Paying the loan back. I hope the collateral are not your real estate properties because they will end up taking it.

The deed has been done.

I will just advice you to try and hustle and be supportive as she needs you very much during this trying times.
We don't have a property,we were paying rent in Port Harcourt as my dad's people took all he had.

Thanks I'll try.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 1:02pm On Aug 20, 2019
greatme2good:

It's normal to feel that way coz you are human but still don't go too extreme. She needs you now like never before...forgive her, comfort her and never judge her. If you loose her to death then you will know what it means not to have a parent especially a mother.
yeah that's right. Thank you, greatme2good.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 1:03pm On Aug 20, 2019
seunmohmoh:
She was charmed.. Forgive her.

But how are you guys gonna pay the loan back?
That I don't know. I feel like calling him and giving him a piece of my mind.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by yomi007k(m): 1:04pm On Aug 20, 2019
Enchantaurl:
We don't have a property,we were paying rent in Port Harcourt as my dad's people took all he had.

Thanks I'll try.
Wow. Sorry to hear that.

What about the POS shops and the poultry? U can't go back and open it.

If u had not gotten admission, I think u wud have managed the business well.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 1:04pm On Aug 20, 2019
theButterfly:
If you're a spiritual person, you should understand that he was obviously sent to cause destruction in her once successful life. This should be a lesson to you as you get older - be prayerful and vigilant of who you allow into your life b|c it's not everyone who comes into it that means well. You can tell if you pay attention to what they say and do from the get-go, and bounce right away. Him telling her he wanted to learn her poultry business while she learn his was a huge red flag and I'm glad you called this a "guise" b|c that's what it was, but your mom didn't see it. She didn't need him for anything, as her businesses were thriving then; he was the one who obviously wanted to rip her off. Threatening to kill her and trying to break your family apart also shows he was the devil in disguise. Again, there were warnings but your mom didn't see them.


Ephesians 6:12
For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places.


Thank you.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by generationz(f): 1:05pm On Aug 20, 2019
Enchantaurl:
No, I just knew about the loan this month as I came back home from school. She's not started paying.


Sorry dear.

I feel your pain. Wish I could help

Just stay strong. Everything will be fine.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 1:07pm On Aug 20, 2019
yomi007k:


What about the POS shops and the poultry? U can't go back and open it.

If u had not gotten admission, I think u wud have managed the business well.
The POS involves cash transactions,so I need cash to be able to give people and collect a charge from them. And the poultry farm she sold it and invested into their imaginary business.

Yes my admission got in the way, but I can't dump my school na,+ I expected her to be wiser.

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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by Enchantaurl(f): 1:08pm On Aug 20, 2019
smiley
generationz:



Sorry dear.

I feel your pain. Wish I could help

Just stay strong. Everything will be fine.



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Re: Do You Think My Mum Was Jazzed? by peacefulhome(f): 1:33pm On Aug 20, 2019
I do not think she was jazz. Your mum was tired of staying alone and seeing someone who shows her love( fake love aka gold digger)she completely fell for it . That is the end result when we over fall in love. I can love oh, but with my money God forbid.

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