Blackivy29:
Evening dear.

Good evening.

Blackivy29:
I just wanted answers. When we broke up, he gave me none. Rather he was dribbling me like a ball. I was confused. If he had a good reason, i would have left him. But now that i got a chance as to why the love of my like broke my heart, i wish i hadnt. Hes blaming me in that innocent way. And he believes it. Because he doesnt know its me.

You really believe he doesn't know it's you? Common, well he'll probably say he's sorry and wants you back. Anyways I hope you find whatever you seek.

Blackivy29:
that wasnt my intention. I was crying over the phone because initially i had asked him why he sent those mean messages and he was dodging. He denied then at first. Then he would apologize then complain that im confusing him.

The poor lad. You were using his head to play football.

healthserve:



Tell him you're cool with the breakup but can't move on if he doesn't explain the motive for the breakup. Tell him its the least he can do, some of us are this way. You need reasons. Tell him to give you reasons. Simple

Mr healthserve....I know that having closure on a matter is really good, but when it comes to all this lust relationships the best closure is the one u derive for urself...
there’s no point telling her to go ask him for reasons.... that’s just showing the dude still has a lot of power over him and what he will say will help her move on...that’s crap.....and we humans can be very cruel we know how to play the blame game and play victim. we always make it look like our ex is at fault......And because she’s still in love she’ll be bitter blaming herself cos the guy will definitely play victim.....
Blackivy29 pick urself up...let it ring in ur head, no one determines ur happiness but u...ur ex owes u no explanation for walking away, he’s a chicken and scared cat, not bold enuf to talk to u, he’s even probably wicked not caring how u’ll feel...
... tell urself u are great girl... it’s his loss at the end of the day

yomi007k:

Baby.

Have you tried begging him?

Please don't get me wrong but I think u sort of took his babyish nature for granted.
When he told u about the whole g.f stuff, u thought he was bluffing. What if it was a test, what if there is no girl anywhere?


..... It's just my perspective. Not a conclusion.

it was a test. But i didnt end things because of the gf stuff. I gave him a chance to explain. But he got angry. If he had explained i would have been cool but he was ignoring my question. And as a girl, i was tensed up. He wasnt assuring me or anything.

1StopRudeness:


Mr healthserve....I know that having closure on a matter is really good, but when it comes to all this lust relationships the best closure is the one u derive for urself...
there’s no point telling her to go ask him for reasons.... that’s just showing the dude still has a lot of power over him and what he will say will help her move on...that’s crap.....and we humans can be very cruel we know how to play the blame game and play victim. we always make it look like our ex is at fault......And because she’s still in love she’ll be bitter blaming herself cos the guy will definitely play victim.....
Blackivy29 pick urself up...let it ring in ur head, no one determines ur happiness but u...ur ex owes u no explanation for walking away, he’s a chicken and scared cat, not bold enuf to talk to u, he’s even probably wicked not caring how u’ll feel...
... tell urself u are great girl... it’s his loss at the end of the day

Abi. You spoke well


Back in the good days people date one two or three straight to altar. Now people date fifty persons and still don't have themselves settled. I begin to wonder if its crude oil people search for in relationships thesedays

Korllami007:


The problem is you don't know the reason behind is action that's why you are in a state of confusion. If he doesn't tell you why he's acting weird, you can forget him before you start having migraine because of relationship.
I know that you don't want to lose him because of his good guy behavior and probably your next boyfriend may not be as nice as him but life is a gamble, play responsibily.

You get me completely. Im bad when it comes to dating and choosing guys.

dottozil:


You really believe he doesn't know it's you? Common, well he'll probably say he's sorry and wants you back. Anyways I hope you find whatever you seek.

He doesnt thats for sure. He's opening up because according to him, he's hurt.

Blackivy29:
it was a test. But i didnt end things because of the gf stuff. I gave him a chance to explain. But he got angry. If he had explained i would have been cool but he was ignoring my question. And as a girl, i was tensed up. He wasnt assuring me or anything.

Relax.
You don't need to get angry. Everybody is tensed up in Nigeria.

Try and use his babyish nature on him too. In relationships, you might be offended and still need to make apologies to make things work.

Try this and clear your conscience that you did your best to make things work.

You still love him.

P.s I don't believe there is any "girl friend " any where.
There might be a girl but not confirmed.

He just wanted to know if you would fight to keep him.

1StopRudeness:


Mr healthserve....I know that having closure on a matter is really good, but when it comes to all this lust relationships the best closure is the one u derive for urself...
there’s no point telling her to go ask him for reasons.... that’s just showing the dude still has a lot of power over him and what he will say will help her move on...that’s crap.....and we humans can be very cruel we know how to play the blame game and play victim. we always make it look like our ex is at fault......And because she’s still in love she’ll be bitter blaming herself cos the guy will definitely play victim.....
Blackivy29 pick urself up...let it ring in ur head, no one determines ur happiness but u...ur ex owes u no explanation for walking away, he’s a chicken and scared cat, not bold enuf to talk to u, he’s even probably wicked not caring how u’ll feel...
... tell urself u are great girl... it’s his loss at the end of the day

Thumbs up

1StopRudeness:


Mr healthserve....I know that having closure on a matter is really good, but when it comes to all this lust relationships the best closure is the one u derive for urself...
there’s no point telling her to go ask him for reasons.... that’s just showing the dude still has a lot of power over him and what he will say will help her move on...that’s crap.....and we humans can be very cruel we know how to play the blame game and play victim. we always make it look like our ex is at fault......And because she’s still in love she’ll be bitter blaming herself cos the guy will definitely play victim.....
Blackivy29 pick urself up...let it ring in ur head, no one determines ur happiness but u...ur ex owes u no explanation for walking away, he’s a chicken and scared cat, not bold enuf to talk to u, he’s even probably wicked not caring how u’ll feel...
... tell urself u are great girl... it’s his loss at the end of the day

thanks. Getting answers is hurting.

yomi007k:

Relax.
You don't need to get angry. Everybody is tensed up in Nigeria.

Try and use his babyish nature on him too. In relationships, you might be offended and still need to make apologies to make things work.

Try this and clear your conscience that you did your best to make things work.

You still love him.

P.s I don't believe there is any "girl friend " any where.
There might be a girl but not confirmed.

He just wanted to know if you would fight to keep him.

I guess i still do. I dont like manipulating thats why. He could have explained to me before things ended.

SenecaTheYonger:

The poor lad. You were using his head to play football.

Blackivy29:
I guess i still do. I dont like manipulating thats why. He could have explained to me before things ended.

You can still pass the test.
He has begged u in the past. This is not about who is right or wrong. Its about ending this thread and being happy.

Ardar:
You've just been played.

If you've had sex with him them am sorry to say that that's all he wanted and nothing else.

He was sweet to you and then suddenly changed, he don chop finish na wetin again remain?

Now he's trying to push you away without giving you any tangible reason cuz that is how they are.

he has moved on from you to his next victim (His new GF) , I just dey pity the girl.

Tomorrow now guys like this will come to nairaland whine and rant about women and insult them

Stop crying for that he-goat, he is not worth your tears.

Men and their wahala.

he just turned 18. We havent even kissed. But we've had romantic moments nothing sexual. Im just tired of the pain.

Blackivy29:
He's babyish and thats why i loved him. I could be myself with him. So when i asked him to break up, heartbroken hoping he would say no, he wanted to please my by granting my wish! He agreed.
He still loves me. Im a wicked girl who broke his heart. I misunderstood him, bla bla bla. Im shocked, so now he's the victim? Wow. Guys are the most complex creatures to walk the earth.

please how old are you again?

Blackivy29:
he just turned 18. We havent even kissed. But we've had romantic moments nothing sexual. Im just tired of the pain.

so you are using one 18 year old boy to judge man. Smh, i knew you'd be a teen from your first post.

Kapilta:
so you are using one 18 year old boy to judge man. Smh, i knew you'd be a teen from your first post.

he's now an adult na.

Korllami007:
I think Mrs.education is not working. Na only theory you sabi you no fit do practical.

Typical Nigerian student.

JONNYSPUTE:
Chai.After all the whole female miseducation.

alpha, secondary alpha, beta, how to play the game of a player, understanding the heart of men(part 1, 2, & 3)

Blackivy29:
he just turned 18. We havent even kissed. But we've had romantic moments nothing sexual. Im just tired of the pain.

Martinez39:


alpha, secondary alpha, beta, how to play the game of a player, understanding the heart of men(part 1, 2, & 3)

..

Blackivy29:

I'm just as confused as you are

Blackivy29:
You get me completely. Im bad when it comes to dating and choosing guys.

I think the lack of sex between you guys might have been frustrating him. He might have be thinking why the wait when he's not even sure where the relationship will lead to. Just imagine after five years of dating without no sex, you see someone better than him financially or in other aspect and then you dump him, which is possible. At the moment, you maybe thinking you love and nothing can make yoh leave him, but the love you think you have for him may not pass the test of time because the way you view the world may change as time goes on, which may change the way you view him also. That's why they say, the only permanence in the world is change.
To me ooo, if things don't work out with you guys, I'll advice you to suspend relationship for now and focus on your self because most guys eyes choco. Before you see guys that will accept no sex relationship with you, e go te. They will see your age as set back because 6 to 7 years from now, marriage may not even be on your mind.

JONNYSPUTE:
..

Okay dear, dearie.


if you understand

Martinez39:
Okay dear, dearie.


if you understand

.. Lol. I got you.

Blackivy29:
I've complained alot here on nairaland about my ex boyfriend who broke my heart for no good reason.
I need answers, so i created another fb account ( i know, thats immature, but i wouldnt get over him if i dont know the truth). I sent him a friend request and we started chatting ( i used a guys profile.) i complained that i had a gf who broke up with me with no cause and my ex came out too. According to him, i did the same thing too. Wtf! He sent me a message stating that he had a new gf and that i was stupid. But he didnt let that all out. Yes, i did ask him if he wanted us to split and he was like, "if thats what you want" i wanted him to say no. But he didnt. He told me (my other account), that he broke up with me because he didnt want to be a source of unhappiness in my life.
He is naturally sweet and he likes pleasing me. If i tease him that im angry, he would take it seriously and apologize. Then i would have to explain that im joking. Typing...

You need to grow up. People don't owe you any explanation and it's not every explanation that you must know. Forget about him and move on. Once someone doesn't want you or is unserious, move on. Gosh.

Martinez39:


alpha, secondary alpha, beta, how to play the game of a player, understanding the heart of men(part 1, 2, & 3)

She go soon turn it to Korean movies series. "Understanding the heart of men" season 1, episode 2.

@ Korllami007 i would love to agree but thats not it. He tends to see me as this innocent thing. He found it weird when i talked dirty once. He likes that whole romance, looking at each other love than sex. Once his friends were watching porn and i was curious (i didnt know that it was it then)he prevented me. That i wouldnt like it.

Martinez39:


alpha, secondary alpha, beta, how to play the game of a player, understanding the heart of men(part 1, 2, & 3)

not here dear.

Martinez39:
You need to grow up. People don't owe you any explanation and it's not every explanation that you must know. Forget about him and move on. Once someone doesn't want you or is unserious, move on. Gosh.

please. So its cool for someone to toy with my emotion and i should just walk away content. If i were a guy your response would be different.

JONNYSPUTE:
Chai.After all the whole female miseducation.

All this girls, confusion full their head

Blackivy27:
not here dear.

Grow up. How old are you?