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Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 7:15am On Oct 31, 2019
Women bashers, Clueless Men, and people that have never been in love, please keep off.
I'm already seeing some worthless "offpoint" statements and disregard. How difficult is it for Nigerian Adults to either be meaningfully useful, or ignore and mind their business?



To my fellow men, how did you get through this?

You fall in love with someone, and they leave you and never come back. You plead, and plead, and cry at their feet because you loved them sincerely. But they swear never to come back.

Not that you were a bad person that beat up your partner, cheated on them or treated them carelessly. You only made a few "common" mistakes like raising your voice, correcting certain flaws, or whatever it is that would go on in a relationship and normal couples will get through it. But your partner leaves you 3 times because he/she "wasn't happy" in the relationship because of these "common" mistakes/situations. You beg them and they come back, but this 4th time they leave you, you go on to try to get them back for days or weeks, with no success.

Usually they like to leave because they've found someone else. Sometimes they leave because they cannot cope with you. But you really want them for all their great qualities, and this 4th time, you've made up your mind to be good. To be better than you ever was, even though you cannot really see how those "common" relationship situations are worthy to be called faults that should lead to a breakup.

They make up their mind not to return to you. Cry, roll in mud, bang your head a hundred times but they're unimpressed. Their minds have been made up to "leave a man like you for a man that will value and cherish them". In fact seeing you, your calls, and texts make them angrier.


My friends, how did you get through this situation?
How did you comfort yourself with their absence with the fact that in your heart, you know they were too good but your small mistakes were huge to them and you let them down.

You wanted them forever. Marriage, children and happiness. Now you wonder if there are any people as good as they were. You're worried you'll never such love and kindness and commitment and passion and honestly and loyalty and dedication and pureness of heart, anywhere in the world again.

You really want them back. But they don't even want to see your name or face anywhere. They used to love you. But their fragile hearts couldn't endure your little naggings or jokes, or complaints and inconsistent love. They had their own shortcomings too. In fact, you reacted the times you did because of their actions. But they put all the blames on you. For love's sake you accept all the pains and blames and decide to fight further and keep things together. But they are now less interested. They're also worried about the tribal differences between your families.

Not that you're begging to be loved. No. They're unhappy because of you. Your "common" mistakes hurt and offend them. So you "beg" for forgiveness. But they've had enough of you.

Men that has been in these oversized shoes that are mine currently, how did you get through this?

7 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 7:16am On Oct 31, 2019
Maybe if I comment first on my own topic it'll make me feel better for a minute.
I'm gonna tag a few wise friends so that they can try to help me get through this

Hopefullandlord, Hahn. HappyPagan, Michellekabod2.
Zikzikzik (I've always wanted to talk to you about how you feel. You don't have to end life, everything will be okay).
Hakeem12, 1sharon, hakeem4. Capslocked, skeetz, johnydon22, hardmirror. Atlantia, stupidity. MJbolt, dalaman, calliope, xxsabrinaxx. Izzou, lordreed. Janettee, Hopeforcharles. Ever wise tintingz.

Ubunja/Martinez39 (please don't tell me about redpills. Sometimes, genuine love is bigger than anything in it's way.)

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Oluromantic: 7:18am On Oct 31, 2019
Lol. Stop dating girls in their early 20s. They have a lot of attention from men that makes them use extreme words like "never again" No wise human use words of finality in relating with people.. Girls in their early 30s are better unless you're very young too.

Avoid excess familiarity with one woman. They declare always that they want a man who will love them if possible more than Jesus loves them, but in reality what they want is a man who can overlook their emotional manipulations... they themselves know they're trouble and they enjoy being one. That's why u see some men have 3 girlfriends so as not to get too used to one to d level of regretting showing her too much love.

Choose personality over beauty. The understanding of temperament may help. Some peaceful girls may be dark in complexion, plumpy, and calm while you are looking for a yellow slim and active queens English speaker who may be insensitive. Many men have reached their early grave cus of beauty

101 Likes 10 Shares

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Offpoint: 7:22am On Oct 31, 2019
Ask Tom and Jerrygrin

4 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by IamNotWariz: 7:34am On Oct 31, 2019
swaggzo:

To my fellow men, how did you get through this?
You fall in love with someone, and they leave you and never come back. You plead, and plead, and cry at their feet because you loved them sincerely. But they swear never to come back.
Why should you beg to be loved?? That should be your first focus

As a man, are you that worthless Because that's the impression you are giving

21 Likes 1 Share

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Donexy16(m): 7:36am On Oct 31, 2019
I feel your pain bro, I can relate. Buh then she has moved on.. You should too.

2 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Nobody: 7:37am On Oct 31, 2019
Them for put you for middle for general beating if nah true you dey talk say all dis things happen ����

5 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by OG1BABY(f): 7:37am On Oct 31, 2019
The only way is to move on. You can't do more than yourself. Apply all caution in your next. All the best

2 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by IamNotWariz: 7:46am On Oct 31, 2019
Jezyfreezman:
Them for put you for middle for general beating if nah true you dey talk say all dis things happen

2 Likes 1 Share

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 7:48am On Oct 31, 2019
IamNotWariz:
Why should you beg to be loved?? That should be your first focus

As a man, are you that worthless Because that's the impression you are giving

When you feel you have offended someone, when you see them gloomy.. Because of something you did or didn't do, I think it is okay to try to cheer them up in anyway you can. Even if you have to "beg" them to forgive your mistakes.

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by rottennaija(m): 7:48am On Oct 31, 2019
Time... Heals all wound. Though the scar might remain in some cases.

But give it time, you will fall in love again with someone that is matured and cherish you the way you do cherish her. And she will be mature enough to understand that in relationship, it takes two to make it work, talk about the difficulties, differences and making amends in both parties and being willing to create allowance for each other.

3 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 7:53am On Oct 31, 2019
rottennaija:
Time... Heals all wound. Though the scar might remain in some cases.

But give it time, you will fall in love again with someone that is matured and cherish you the way you do cherish her. And she will be mature enough to understand that in relationship, it takes two to make it work, talk about the difficulties, differences and making amends in both parties and being willing to create allowance for each other.

This is nice. But you know, it's gonna take sometime.
I'm a really sensitive person. I look around, see all these people and the kind of life.. And it doesn't make me comfortable.
I've been heartbroken before. Lover of 4 years won't stop messing around with random boys while crying she loves me. Kept forgiving, until I ran out of forgiveness. Lover didn't even care. Only calls once in 4 months till today to remind me of the worse relationship experience.

I look around and I see many people like her who won't stop messing around. Then I spot this one that is 99% all I've dreamed of. Now I lose it.

Everything will be alright, I know. But right now, everything is all wrong.

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Nobody: 7:56am On Oct 31, 2019
[quote author=IamNotWariz post=83614948][/quote] nah so e suppose be cheesy
Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by dave4rella(m): 8:06am On Oct 31, 2019
grin
Women Will continue toying with your emotions as long as as you continue being a sisy
It's okay to apologize
But you see begging on your knees.. Damn!
Move oh bro, she never loved you.
Even if it means reducing your standards to feel real love... Please do

13 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Avast(m): 8:06am On Oct 31, 2019
IamNotWariz:
Why should you beg to be loved?? That should be your first focus

As a man, are you that worthless Because that's the impression you are giving

May God bless you and your family
Amen

swaggzo:
Women bashers, Clueless Men, and people that have never been in love, please keep off.
I'm already seeing some worthless "offpoint" statements and disregard.

All these to your fellow men because of woman, you are indeed WATTLESS.

8 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Oreofepeters: 8:14am On Oct 31, 2019
Never beg a woman to love you, know your worth. Are you that bad ?

2 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by MrLekan95(m): 8:21am On Oct 31, 2019
here to read comments �

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by rottennaija(m): 8:31am On Oct 31, 2019
swaggzo:


This is nice. But you know, it's gonna take sometime.
I'm a really sensitive person. I look around, see all these people and the kind of life.. And it doesn't make me comfortable.
I've been heartbroken before. Lover of 4 years won't stop messing around with random boys while crying she loves me. Kept forgiving, until I ran out of forgiveness. Lover didn't even care. Only calls once in 4 months till today to remind me of the worse relationship experience.

I look around and I see many people like her who won't stop messing around. Then I spot this one that is 99% all I've dreamed of. Now I lose it.

Everything will be alright, I know. But right now, everything is all wrong.

I understand your pain. Have been there before, lost a relationship of almost 9 years because of religion, my life was practically built around her, she was my dream, my life, my love etc. At the end, it ended like that.

Though it's been more than a year, each time I think about her or discuss with her in phone or in person, it puts me in a melancholy mood. I have met different people with different trait and characters, I kept moving forward, kept looking for the sort of person I'm interested in.

Am I happy today? Yes. Am I also sad? Yes, for I am sad of how it could have been. In all these, I learnt a big lesson and I could move forward. In my own case, while I knew we love each other, I also learnt than in some cases, love for something else was greater than the love she had for me (in this case her religion). So in that case, it probably was all for nothing.

Anyway, believe me. You will get over it and will be a better person. But it's not easy, but you will pull through.

12 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by 24kmagic: 8:37am On Oct 31, 2019
Make I book space first, this post long
Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Omar09(m): 8:40am On Oct 31, 2019
swaggzo:
Maybe if I comment first on my own topic it'll make me feel better for a minute.
I'm gonna tag a few wise friends so that they can try to help me get through this

Hopefullandlord, Hahn. HappyPagan, Michellekabod2.
Zikzikzik (I've always wanted to talk to you about how you feel. You don't have to end life, everything will be okay).
Hakeem12, 1sharon, hakeem4. Capslocked, skeetz, johnydon22, hardmirror. Atlantia, stupidity. MJbolt, dalaman, calliope, xxsabrinaxx. Izzou, lordreed. Janettee, Hopeforcharles. Ever wise tintingz.

Ubunja/Martinez39 (please don't tell me about redpills. Sometimes, genuine love is bigger than anything in it's way.)

You didn't tag me. Red pill. I think it's high time you stopped begging. See beyond them. You are better off without them.

I was once like you. I will beg to be loved. To even kiss her, to caress her, to feel her, but all to no avail. I didn't have any intention of having sex with her for those who would say it's lust, I loved her, but she left me twice n I begged. But on the third one I was prepared to die without her since I can't live without her. It's all in your head, don't be afraid to try new things.

The human is designed to be afraid of change. Conquer that fear n you will see that not all things are worth the fight. You are scared you will meet someone worse than her, but even if you do, you still kick her out like you did to the one before n you keep on going n going till meet your perfect match.

Ubunja
Martinez39

15 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 8:40am On Oct 31, 2019
rottennaija:


I understand your pain. Have been there before, lost a relationship of almost 9 years because of religion, my life was practically built around her, she was my dream, my life, my love etc. At the end, it ended like that.

Though it's been more than a year, each time I think about her or discuss with her in phone or in person, it puts me in a melancholy mood. I have met different people with different trait and characters, I kept moving forward, kept looking for the sort of person I'm interested in.

Am I happy today? Yes. Am I also sad? Yes, for I am sad of how it could have been. In all these, I learnt a big lesson and I could move forward. In my own case, while I knew we love each other, I also learnt than in some cases, love for something else was greater than the love she had for me (in this case her religion). So in that case, it probably was all for nothing.

Anyway, believe me. You will get over it and will be a better person. But it's not easy, but you will pull through.

I need this kind of talk 3 times daily. How can I talk to you off this place?

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by banjicom(m): 8:42am On Oct 31, 2019
swaggzo:


This is nice. But you know, it's gonna take sometime.
I'm a really sensitive person. I look around, see all these people and the kind of life.. And it doesn't make me comfortable.
I've been heartbroken before. Lover of 4 years won't stop messing around with random boys while crying she loves me. Kept forgiving, until I ran out of forgiveness. Lover didn't even care. Only calls once in 4 months till today to remind me of the worse relationship experience.

I look around and I see many people like her who won't stop messing around. Then I spot this one that is 99% all I've dreamed of. Now I lose it.

Everything will be alright, I know. But right now, everything is all wrong.

things will be fine bro i understand how you feel and your current situation now, because i am currently facing the same. Our stories isn't much different, i lost my relationship in the beginning of this year because my girl broke up with me for no valid reason.......Lols we dated for like only 8 months and within that 8 months we had about 6 breakup over little things that isn't worth it, apparently i was the one who was beginning to keep the relationship.



i have decided to stay single on till further notice cheesy

11 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Prinss: 8:45am On Oct 31, 2019
Just because you love someone/something does not mean you must be with them/have them.

#Hard_truths_101

5 Likes 1 Share

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 8:48am On Oct 31, 2019
Omar09:


You didn't tag me. Red pill. I think it's high time you stopped begging. See beyond them. You are better off without them.

I was once like you. I will beg to be loved. To even kiss her, to caress her, to feel her, but all to no avail. I didn't have any intention of having sex with her for those who would say it's lust, I loved her, but she left me twice n I begged. But on the third one I was prepared to die without her since I can't live without her. It's all in your head, don't be afraid to try new things.

The human is designed to be afraid of change. Conquer that fear n you will see that not all things are worth the fight. You are scared you will meet someone worse than her, but even if you do, you still kick her out like you did to the one before n you keep on going n going till meet your perfect match.


There are wise people on this forum afterall. I'm shocked.
Thank you for this beauty.
Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by rottennaija(m): 8:53am On Oct 31, 2019
swaggzo:


I need this kind of talk 3 times daily. How can I talk to you off this place?

I have sent you a mail
Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 8:56am On Oct 31, 2019
banjicom:


things will be fine bro i understand how you feel and your current situation now, because i am currently facing the same. Our stories isn't much different, i lost my relationship in the beginning of this year because my girl broke up with me for no valid reason.......Lols we dated for like only 8 months and within that 8 months we had about 6 breakup over little things that isn't worth it, apparently i was the one who was begging to keep the relationship.



i have decided to stay single on till further notice cheesy
.

Lol.. Yours 8 months. Mine will be 8 tomorrow too cheesy
But.. I think it's over now. So I engage in my hobby.. Beer drinking and watching my favorite club bottle leads. We'll be alright mate.

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Omar09(m): 9:03am On Oct 31, 2019
swaggzo:


There are wise people on this forum afterall. I'm shocked.
Thank you for this beauty.

Remember this, no one is perfect, n no one is worth you stressing yourself by feeling sad and unhappy. Just know this no one is irreplaceable and no one can take a permanent spot in your life. Whoever wants to stress you, tell them you want to stress me n kick them out. Simple.

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by just4fun(m): 9:28am On Oct 31, 2019
I can relate to this.

We were so closed that i felt within me that I would marry her. I guess was i still immature then to know how to go about the relationship.

She sometimes complained of her people not wanting anything to do with me based on my background. i never understood how much this was hurting her until one day when she called pouring out her heart. The response i gave wasn't helpful to her and she ended the call and that was the last called we ever heard.

Called her a thousand time and she never responded and that was when it dawned on me that i truly loved this girl.

Life goes on Bro, Got myself back after about 3 months of "crying". Fortunately for me, it was like God was reserving my present wife to come in at that moment of grief and today, Happily Married with Lovely cuties.

14 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by swaggzo(m): 10:08am On Oct 31, 2019
just4fun:
I can relate to this.

We were so closed that i felt within me that I would marry her. I guess was i still immature then to know how to go about the relationship.

She sometimes complained of her people not wanting anything to do with me based on my background. i never understood how much this was hurting her until one day when she called pouring out her heart. The response i gave wasn't helpful to her and she ended the call and that was the last called we ever heard.

Called her a thousand time and she never responded and that was when it dawned on me that i truly loved this girl.

Life goes on Bro, Got myself back after about 3 months of "crying". Fortunately for me, it was like God was reserving my present wife to come in at that moment of grief and today, Happily Married with Lovely cuties.

3 months of crying.. Wow.
I've done just a few days and my tear jar is dry.
I hesitated to create this thread. For days.
I'm glad with all these experiences you've all shared on this thread.

Forward, onwards. Thanks.
Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by just4fun(m): 10:17am On Oct 31, 2019
swaggzo:


3 months of crying.. Wow.
I've done just a few days and my tear jar is dry.
I hesitated to create this thread. For days.
I'm glad with all these experiences you've all shared on this thread.

Forward, onwards. Thanks.

Bros, even me no knw say i fit like girl reach dat level.
Its all history anyway..

1 Like

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Hybrahym94(m): 10:19am On Oct 31, 2019
As a man, you need to value your worth first. Then approach the lady and let her know how valuable you are, show it to her but please do not beg a lady to stay. That is been desperate when you actually be ambitious.

10 Likes

Re: Men Only: How Did You Get Through This? by Nobody: 10:49am On Oct 31, 2019
This place smells of estrogen, can someone give me a spray? Everyone experiences heartache at one time or the other but as a man, a lot is expected from you in terms of how you handle it. What's all this talk of crying and begging? My ex called me to break up a relationship. I was really hurt but I refused to show it. Never called her again, she was the one who kept calling later to check on me, and even when she claims she misses me, I just tell her thanks, I don't ever say, I miss her too even though I did. She still calls till date after many years and both parties have since married.
Men should learn to control emotions if you want to be taken seriously. Women will prey on your weakness if you ever let them see it. Go and hang out with your guys, let them tease you and make fun of your situation, it helps. Stop crying like a woman and put yourself together. Time heals all wounds no matter how deep. I don't frown at you grieving but the way you are handling it is messed up. Grow some balls son.

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