Tell him ASAP, let everything scatter, it will fall back in place, it will only take time. Whatever decision he makes will not change the fact that everything will be alright in the end.

Mariangeles:

You observed how she talked about her brother's wife being "siki siki " without compassion ?
It wasn't right .

I don't want to get angry with you this morning. You say I talk about my family being sick siki without compassion, you're not a serious person at all. Do you have any SS person in your house? Do you know the amount of attention and care they require? Are you aware that most times they're weak and out of breath? I love my SIL almost as much as I love my siblings but I don't like the fact that she can't do most things regular people do because of her health. I'm done talking to you. Bye

This secret is deep.Mymum's neighbour has 3 sicklers out of 4 kids.One died and two are looking yellow with bloated stomachs.They are illiterates and poor,yet All Their earnings Go to the hospital.

You are lucky both of You are compatible but he needs to know.

There are some things you don't keep from the ones you love especially your boyfriend or husband. I and my husband meet in school but we started our relationship during an ASUU strike. I told him I am asthmatic. Funny thing was that he smokes then and I never knew and he stopped it because he wanted the relationship to work. You know what, the day we resume and meet I had almost the worse crisis I have ever had in all the history of my asthma attacks. Imagine I didn't tell him and he had smoked where I was, just imagine me having such a bad crisis without him smoking. Maybe I would have been dead by now. Op, tell him ASAP. He is your Fiance, you should have studied him enough to know how to present your speech to him. I would wish you good luck.

AwkaetitiBabe:
She didn't lie but withholding information. Yes, people in love Lie to keep that love.

I hope you'll keep this same energy and opinion if your husband withholds information like he is HIV positive and suffers from weak erection?

abelswife:


I don't want to get angry with you this morning. You say I talk about my family being sick siki without compassion, you're not a serious person at all. Do you have any SS person in your house? Do you know the amount of attention and care they require? Are you aware that most times they're weak and out of breath? I love my SIL almost as much as I love my siblings but I don't like the fact that she can't do most things regular people do because of her health. I'm done talking to you. Bye

Was I talking to you ?
Hey! You're free to get angry all you want.
Your type are those who make people feel guilty and less for being sick .

The right time to tell him is now. Not telling him now but on the wedding night would be highly deceptive of you.

Alexgeneration:
I hope you'll keep this same energy and opinion if your husband withhold information like he is HIV positive and suffers from weak erection?

Mabinu. I was wrong.

abelswife:


I don't want to get angry with you this morning. You say I talk about my family being sick siki without compassion, you're not a serious person at all. Do you have any SS person in your house? Do you know the amount of attention and care they require? Are you aware that most times they're weak and out of breath? I love my SIL almost as much as I love my siblings but I don't like the fact that she can't do most things regular people do because of her health. I'm done talking to you. Bye

You talk about your family without compassion. Assuming the person in quote is your sister will you talk about her like that.

Thank you for all your advice, you don't have to show your personal resentment.

My husband to be is AA and not AS, and I'm not rushing into marriage because you all don't know my age.
SS patient are people like you too, they came by the mistake made by their parents.

Also, some SS are even healthier than most AA without sickness or drugs or attention.
I will pick your advice wisely.

Thanks

damilare214:


You talk about your family without compassion. Assuming the person in quote is your sister will you talk about her like that.

Thank you for all your advice, you don't have to show your personal resentment.

My husband to be is AA and not AS, and I'm not rushing into marriage because you all don't know my age.
SS patient are people like you too, they came by the mistake made by their parents.

Also, some SS are even healthier than most AA without sickness or drugs or attention.
I will pick your advice wisely.

Thanks

Exactly. The mistakes of their parents are what we all are tying to avoid. Besides op, no one is judging you for being SS, in fact, I adore SS because it’s not easy and y’all are the real MVP. We all are talking for the sake of trust in your relationship so you won’t lose it and so your husband would know how he can help you. No one, not even any single one of us is judging you. It’s better you tell him than someone else telling him or him finding out in any other way.

Breaststroke:


Maria between you and I, you're the only one seeing something wrong with what Abelswife wrote.

I saw absolutely nothing wrong with her narrative, it was matter of fact and simple. No ill will there.

@ Bukatyne, did you just encourage the OP to carry on with her deceit? I can't go to page 1 to quote the particular comment that has me wondering.

@ OP, I don't know you personally but I feel resentment towards you for wanting to start a life long relationship with deceit. What happened to basic honesty in your relationship?

You see what happens when people want to marry at all costs? Singleness is not a disease you need to be cured from ooo!

Wonder not my dear.

I only told her not to fess up after marriage cornering him.

If she is serious, sorry and truly loves him, she will fess up today and leave the guy to make his choice BEFORE Saturday.

Oops! Today is Thursday.

Alexgeneration:
I hope you'll keep this same energy and opinion if your husband withhold information like he is HIV positive and suffers from weak erection?

Hahahaha!

Fountainofyouth:



Yes I am, a man I almost married lied that he was AS while being SS, it was a LDR so I didn't suspect anything, he started going off for like days or a week, I felt it was job things so didn't bother, when it became very frequent, I felt it was cheating and all, imagine my shock when I went to his place to know what's going on, only for me to see him in the hospital looking lifeless, was told he was SS......i knew we cant go on but I stayed with him out of pity and support till we drifted apart........

There are some things that people should not lie about, I am AA, I would have stayed with him, but he was ready to lie his way to marry me knowing full well I would have no choice but to accept whatever happens, so unfair.

I agree with you, very unfair.

Two years down the line, when the deceived partner starts to seek solace in the kids, drinks, other women/men, drugs etc or torturing the liar, we look at them as evil.

Then they open threads with 'my husband hates me', 'my wife is evil', 'my spouse does not make love to me', 'all my in-laws are against me', 'my hudband/wife does not respect me' etc.

They never say what they did wrong or corrolate their spouses actions as a reaction to their deceit.

Donald95:
Don't tell him. Even after child birth, don't tell him. If you do, he will feel manipulated and his perspective towards you will change and also the love will reduce wella. If later in future he finds out, Blame it on the the doctor that did the first test . Afterall, Abraham lied that Sarah na his sister in other to avoid trouble


By the way, your description says that you are truly AS. Because one of the ways to know them is that they hardly fall sick (Malaria) and they are resistant to cold. Go and do another test somewhere else




Calm down and take a chill pill, He is AA and both of them can work.

Let op try not to make lying part of her

How would it work when the marriage will be built on lies? When she start having crises and he is running about looking for solutions, what other lie would she have to concort? What is bad is bad pls, when someone you love so much lie her way into marrying you and you find out, you'll know how it feels.

A marriage built on lies will still fall like a pack of cards. Just a matter of time.
What a deceitful lady you are.

damilare214:
I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

Truth be told, what you have done is wicked and ungodly, if the wedding is this weekend. You deliberately want to build a family on a faulty foundation.
Your genotype is not the issue. If you can hide this from your supposedly loved husband-to-be up till now, it therefore means you are quietly capable of so many other things.

Those who built on solid foundation have trials how much less one built on sand.

God is not on your side, if you don't open up before formally pronounced married. Don't forget to provide update when your labour begins to bear fruit.

damilare214:


You talk about your family without compassion. Assuming the person in quote is your sister will you talk about her like that.

Thank you for all your advice, you don't have to show your personal resentment.

My husband to be is AA and not AS, and I'm not rushing into marriage because you all don't know my age.
SS patient are people like you too, they came by the mistake made by their parents.

Also, some SS are even healthier than most AA without sickness or drugs or attention.
I will pick your advice wisely.

Thanks

This is not a comparison between AA and SS or who is more healthy, it is about trust issues and the huge lie you want to keep from him, tell him today before walking down the isle on Saturday, who knows, he might not react since the wedding is so close, just tell him, if you don't and you tell him later or he finds out, he may make you suffer and frustrate you out of the marriage, is that what you want? Do you want to give him a very good reason to divorce you and then tell people what a deceitful woman you are? Think about it miss, marriage is not a do or die affair, and he is not the only perfect man out there if you're scared of losing him, tell him the truth.

damilare214:


You talk about your family without compassion. Assuming the person in quote is your sister will you talk about her like that.

Thank you for all your advice, you don't have to show your personal resentment.

My husband to be is AA and not AS, and I'm not rushing into marriage because you all don't know my age.
SS patient are people like you too, they came by the mistake made by their parents.

Also, some SS are even healthier than most AA without sickness or drugs or attention.
I will pick your advice wisely.

Thanks

When you finish calculating the resentment in what I said, make sure you tell your husband to be your real genotype. You will see worse than this when he finds out after you both have been married. If your colleague did not go and forge medical results and report to the church pastor of how her in-laws to be are trying to stop her marriage I will not be here having this conversation with you. Don't think your emotional blackmail will get to me okay?

Fountainofyouth:


This is not a comparison between AA and SS or who is more healthy, it is about trust issues and the huge lie you want to keep from him, tell him today before walking down the isle on Saturday, who knows, he might not react since the wedding is so close, just tell him, if you don't and you tell him later or he finds out, he may make you suffer and frustrate you out of the marriage, is that what you want? Do you want to give him a very good reason to divorce you and then tell people what a deceitful woman you are? Think about it miss, marriage is not a do or die affair, and he is not the only perfect man out there if you're scared of losing him, tell him the truth.

Thank you

I truly feel for people with medical or mental disabilities. But lying to make someone love you is not the right thing to do.
I know it's quite challenging, and the stigma society places on you is not fair.
But love can still find you.
I know a female who is SS and married to a Dr who's also from a very rich background. He didnt marry her becasue of money, he was much richer than her. He knew her genotype. He is so much in love with her , and ready to look after her. They have children together, and all seems well.
So you can also find love despite your medical/physical challenges.
We've seen here on NL, men and women marrying physically challenged spouses, so it does happen

Hmm, so sad you eventually reminded me of something. I lost a friend to that thing 16 years ago. Final year student, then I was still looking for admission, i was almost thru with my dinner when the news came. I think you will know what happened to the rest of the food. Secondly, I lost someone to that thing during my part three on campus, he was also actively doing his final year project, in fact he once took me to his project site. Even though I had a prompting in my spirit on each of the situation . They a both gone, but my Spirit man consoled me with the message the later sent to me on his sick bed. "Tell Oga not to worry, I have seen the Lord". If you like tell, if you like keep it to yourself. It is not about now, but the future, And remember you medical history will help when you start breeding, hmm may be you will lie to the doctor as well. Or maybe you will reveal the truth telling him/her to conceal it from you spouse. Time will tell

Pls for the sake of your future in the marriage you're about to venture into tell him. It's better he knows what he is going into if he truly loves you and want to be with you genotype will not be an inderence, beside if wanna hide it from him wheen u start bearing children this same genotype will manifest in at least one of your children and it will no longer be possible to hide.
And trust me u know how men react toward this kinda thing....

When you give birth and the child's comes out SS what do you do?When you fall ill and need blood,what do you do?You are deceptive and no one should take you seriously.I would run from you to be honest.

I'm getting married this weekend and my husband to be doesn't know about my genotype. I'm SS but lied to him that I'm AS, he is AA.
I don't look like SS neither do I fall sick( I sick once or twice a year),and I'm not on any medication as well.
My doctor and friends advised me not to tell him because of different heartbreaks that I have experienced in the past ( people believe SS dies prematurely).
I have plan to tell him on our wedding night but my friends insist I should wait till I give birth.

Please help me, I don't know the right time to tell him and I don't want to build my marriage on lies.

Before you fully accept to marry your partner, is very crucial that you found out the following from him or her.
1) Genotype and Blood Group. Have you taking it into seriousness to ask your partner about his or her Genotype and Blood Group?
You may think that is too early to know this in the first month in the relationship, what if eventually pregnancy get involved in the relationship and it happens that you and your significant other is both AS?
Nobody prays for such scandal and that's why is very crucial to deal with it on time because for AS to marry AS, their children will not be happy with them.
2) Is crucial that you know the HIV/AIDS status of your partner right from when the Relationship is getting serious before you make love with him or her.
This virus doesn't announce itself to anyone that comes close to the carrier either does it appear in face, but through the medical test, you will know your way with him or her.
3) STI/STD.
Don't say had i know because you didn't care in the beginning. Just like HIV/ADS doesn't make announcement and doesn't appear to the public from the face of the carrier, likewise STIs/STDs does not.
Most of the STI/STD can prevent a woman from having children, some people after taking some drugs will think that they have thoroughly dealt with the infection where as the infection is just hidden in their system and then refused to allow the person to be productive.
Does your woman have rashes in her Womanhood and.....https://allsinglesandmarried..com/2019/10/the-7-secrets-your-partner-may-have.html

.

.

abelswife:
See them. That was how my brother's wife lied. My brother is AS. Because she wanted to marry by force she said she's AA. They went for tests it showed SS and AS for her and my brother. She said their machine is bad and went to another hospital where they have an insider. There they gave them AA for her and AS for my brother. My parents said he shouldn't go ahead with the marriage but they insisted. Now they've have finally gotten married abi? What now happened?

They gave birth to SS
Everyday her and the child are both in and out of the hospital. No savings, no happiness, no Joy. Everyday siki siki. She's siking the baby is siking. My brother is longing mouth and squeezing face

One time both of them had crises at the same time, my mum now used the opportunity to confirm their genotype because she didn't understand why everyday they are always sick. Lo and behold, mother SS. Child SS. We confronted her she was still denying and we showed her the results she started crying.

We are looking.


See ehn. God will not forgive you if your bring another SS child into this world. God will not forgive you if your end up dying on the road and making your husband a widower halfway because you lied.

In fact for even thinking about lying you're a terrible person.

Bye

This thing pain you shaa...


Women believe without marriage, there is no life to live. Most can do anything to answer Mrs

queenitee:

Of course, telling him she’s AS when she’s SS isn't a lie, it’s simply withholding information, a very vital one at that. May God help you.

“People in love don’t lie to keep that love,” in case, you might need this in future. Now you wonder why people who seem so much in love end up breaking up. Because they lie to keep the love and so their love wasn’t based on the truth and when the truth comes out, they fail and fall. But people who don’t lie to keep their love end up growing stronger, because there’s nothing to bring them down anymore, their love was based on the truth right from the very beginning.

You too get sense

I wud advise u repeat ur Hb- genotype test . If it comes out SS, nothing to worry Abt after all he is AA and best for you. But I will insist u tell him before the wedding. If he finds out after the wedding, only God can tell what he wud do. If he truely loves u, he won't see it as a prob. He'd probably blame it on the person who did the Hb- genotype test al binitio.

Fountainofyouth:


This is not a comparison between AA and SS or who is more healthy, it is about trust issues and the huge lie you want to keep from him, tell him today before walking down the isle on Saturday, who knows, he might not react since the wedding is so close, just tell him, if you don't and you tell him later or he finds out, he may make you suffer and frustrate you out of the marriage, is that what you want? Do you want to give him a very good reason to divorce you and then tell people what a deceitful woman you are? Think about it miss, marriage is not a do or die affair, and he is not the only perfect man out there if you're scared of losing him, tell him the truth.

Esta

Kindly respond to your msgs

AwkaetitiBabe:
Tell him now. If he loves you just as Fred amata loved omotola in Mortal Inheritance, things should work out just fine. All d best.

You know why I like you?
You no dey form

livebyday:


Esta

Kindly respond to your msgs

That mail is not in use, sorry.