Unique357:
In brief, I am a male married with 2 children, my daughter is 8 and son is 5. I also have my niece 11 and a house help 15 staying with us.

On Monday I gave my wife Christmas shopping money to get foodstuffs, hers and children clothing including our house help.

Yesterday my wife went shopping, she bought clothes for herself, our children and nothing for the house help. She claimed that the girl doesn’t need any clothes for Christmas as long we feed and send her to school, the rest is her parents' duties. The girl in question is my wife's relative from the same village. This girl is so nice to our children, she is like a second mother to them despite her being just 15, I have never had any problem with her.

I was mad at her that I told her, if she cannot treat another woman's child well then she doesn’t deserve to be a mother, yes I did said some harsh words to her because of anger. She accused me of sleeping with the little girl which I told her she is mad and she couldn’t stop crying the whole night. This morning she didn’t make my breakfast and refused greeting me back.

Please house let me know if I overreacted

Unique357:
In brief, I am a male married with 2 children, my daughter is 8 and son is 5. I also have my niece 11 and a house help 15 staying with us.

On Monday I gave my wife Christmas shopping money to get foodstuffs, hers and children clothing including our house help.

Yesterday my wife went shopping, she bought clothes for herself, our children and nothing for the house help. She claimed that the girl doesn’t need any clothes for Christmas as long we feed and send her to school, the rest is her parents' duties. The girl in question is my wife's relative from the same village. This girl is so nice to our children, she is like a second mother to them despite her being just 15, I have never had any problem with her.

I was mad at her that I told her, if she cannot treat another woman's child well then she doesn’t deserve to be a mother, yes I did said some harsh words to her because of anger. She accused me of sleeping with the little girl which I told her she is mad and she couldn’t stop crying the whole night. This morning she didn’t make my breakfast and refused greeting me back.

Please house let me know if I overreacted

joecason:
Dude you're wife may see stuff that men can't see yet.. Maybe the help wants to stay permanently n can resort to make you sleep with her..
Watch both of them and stay neutral in your stance with them, acting with emotions only dulls the blade

Graxie:
Why are you engaging a minor as househelp? Why. Both you and your wife, you are horrible.

sunnychibs:


hustle hard ooo,so that your children will not become house helps.

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

lomprico:

bigot!

Poorboy:
If you over pamper your househelp hmmmm, you're already becoming a suspect to your wife. Put her in the decision to give money for househelp clothes.... Some women can even suspect your sister.

Kiezodumah:


No sense in the nonsense u spewed..

Unique357:
In brief, I am a male married with 2 children, my daughter is 8 and son is 5. I also have my niece 11 and a house help 15 staying with us.

On Monday I gave my wife Christmas shopping money to get foodstuffs, hers and children clothing including our house help.

Yesterday my wife went shopping, she bought clothes for herself, our children and nothing for the house help. She claimed that the girl doesn’t need any clothes for Christmas as long we feed and send her to school, the rest is her parents' duties. The girl in question is my wife's relative from the same village. This girl is so nice to our children, she is like a second mother to them despite her being just 15, I have never had any problem with her.

I was mad at her that I told her, if she cannot treat another woman's child well then she doesn’t deserve to be a mother, yes I did said some harsh words to her because of anger. She accused me of sleeping with the little girl which I told her she is mad and she couldn’t stop crying the whole night. This morning she didn’t make my breakfast and refused greeting me back.

Please house let me know if I overreacted

Unique357:
In brief, I am a male married with 2 children, my daughter is 8 and son is 5. I also have my niece 11 and a house help 15 staying with us.

On Monday I gave my wife Christmas shopping money to get foodstuffs, hers and children clothing including our house help.

Yesterday my wife went shopping, she bought clothes for herself, our children and nothing for the house help. She claimed that the girl doesn’t need any clothes for Christmas as long we feed and send her to school, the rest is her parents' duties. The girl in question is my wife's relative from the same village. This girl is so nice to our children, she is like a second mother to them despite her being just 15, I have never had any problem with her.

I was mad at her that I told her, if she cannot treat another woman's child well then she doesn’t deserve to be a mother, yes I did said some harsh words to her because of anger. She accused me of sleeping with the little girl which I told her she is mad and she couldn’t stop crying the whole night. This morning she didn’t make my breakfast and refused greeting me back.

Please house let me know if I overreacted

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

Blindersoff:


Op i will tell you straight up and it is up to you to take it or leave it. You are the man of the house and should lead by example.

There is a reason you are the groom and your wife is the Bride. You are to groom the bride. Teach her all that is right and learn from her mistakes those areas you need to GROOM her on.

Right now she has shown you a side of her which i agree is not nice because the girl is her relation and i would not classify such a person as just a house help. SHE IS FAMILY.

Call your wife and apologize to her for your outburst and then calmly teach her or tell her where she went wrong and why the girl needs to be treated right. Let her know that the girl is more or less family since she is related to your wife. This is a very simple matter.

You can then take your wife out and while both of you are out you suggest buying a few clothes for the girl and let her choose what she feels is appropriate to buy for her. Some women grow up with a certain mindset that never changes overnight and i see your wife as one of those. Do not go out and buy stuff for the girl by yourself otherwise you would cause more problems for yourself and for her in the home. Encourage and pet your wife to do that.


I am sure she is a nice woman but maybe in this area in particular she is yet to embrace some truths. Apologize to her.

Ignore all those children here who are saying she needs to come and apologize to you. As the head of your home you are to lead by example. yes she was wrong but you show her the right way by initiating peace. As the head of a home which i also am we take a lot of shit deliberately just so there would be peace at home. It does not make us stupid but after taking this shit, quickly correct the impression calmly then the woman would become aware and she would respect you more.

Merry Christmas to your household

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.

karli4nia:


Tonye... I like this. You maynt be absolutely correct, like no one is, but your views are so thoughtful.

Well, we know If there is anything more common than washing of hands, it is the lamentable hypocrisy of we Nairalanders. No one wants to face the truth about their psychological misery. Its so Sad!

Many pros! Happy holiday...

RisenPhoenix:


I am. But I don't take any faecal matter from anyone; least of all my wife. What I advised is precisely what I would have done; assuming that my wife grew wings and actually accused me of sleeping with the househelp. She knows that replacement wives plenty full Nigeria; as well as outside it. Women are a homogenous lot once you put out the lights; and the last time I've been in love is when I was 15. So no one can pretend to tie me down.

I trust my wife sha, she would never do such a thing. We husbands [men generally] just have to train them well from day one.

TonyeBarcanista:

How did you conclude that the wife ks wicked? Let us watch what we say towards people's spouses.

I am very sure that the wife acted the way did because of the discomfort she feels with a second "woman" enjoying the attention and niceties of her husband.

Honestly, I can NEVER fault her! I have seen first hand where lovely and nice househelp got pregnant for oga and he was asked to marry her as second wife - which he did!

TonyeBarcanista:

Bros, honestly, you are crying over nothing.

Your wife is a woman and you should understand her own position. She doesn't want her relative help to enjoy same privilege as her and her children before things get out of hand. Also, she isn't comfortable with the affection you are showing the girl. You were even wrong to quarrel her and say nasty things to her. Your good intention was spoilt by your action.

Guy, na you find trouble! Even me sef de suspect say your eye de chook for the babe as you don de reason her as second mother.

BTW we have seen relative househelp "chanced" madam in their homes or get pregnant for the oga for house.

Guy, apologise to your wife, and ask her to send the girl to her people.