[quote author=lilwetdick post=85343502]this is just nonsense

this what i hate to read, the pity and emotional game, the story that everything can end just in a day.

getting rich and going broke is a process, it just not start and end in a day

but how can you be earning 30k and be in marriage.

i cant allow a man earning 30k to marry my sister..simple as abc[/quojte]
them beg or force read ham?
your life your choice,
your family your decision,
your sisters life her choice her decision.
if she band bele, punch the foetus come out.

lilwetdick:
this is just nonsense

this what i hate to read, the pity and emotional game, the story that everything can end just in a day.

getting rich and going broke is a process, it just not start and end in a day

but how can you be earning 30k and be in marriage.

i cant allow a man earning 30k to marry my sister..simple as abc

NoBody cares about your sister or whoever she marries.

nakaman:
there is a quote that says it's not how much you earn but how you spend that makes you rich. you can surely start a life with even 20k monthly salary. u can as well be broke Even if you 150k a month. ur life ur choice.

You are quite right. I have a friend who was once working in a multinational upstream oil company; the friend confided in me that most of his colleagues, who earn six figure salaries, were always broke. Infact, one particular fellow's account always goes red within 24 hours of receiving his monthly salary.
The reasons for the above debts are bank loans, heavy housing mortgages, exclusive schools for the children and other forms of loud living etc.

It's not how much a man earn that matters but his zeal and determination.if you see a zealous man,thou he may not be earning much but one can see that the future is very bright for him.when I interview people and ask them some questions,I can predict to some degree of accuracy what the future may be like .money is deceitful but it's what you have upstairs that matters,marriage is not only about the man I have seen men who were nothing before marriage and then the luck and blessing of be married opened doors,even some children bring luck into marriage ,it's good to work hard ,hard work and focus matters more .even a foolish lazy man with no vision can lose an inheritance within days sometimes the African mentality means the man must carry all the load,how can the modern day woman be shouting equal right and does not want to share equal responsibiilty.in Europe,where there is equal right among both sex,responsibility are shared.the man pays the rent and the woman takes some other responsibilities.if a man earn 30k and the both have an agreement on how to survive with it,no problem. There is no problem with starting with 30k but the problem is remaining in 30k without vision or focus or improvement.






.
quote author=lilwetdick post=85343502]this is just nonsense

this what i hate to read, the pity and emotional game, the story that everything can end just in a day.

getting rich and going broke is a process, it just not start and end in a day

but how can you be earning 30k and be in marriage.

i cant allow a man earning 30k to marry my sister..simple as abc[/quote]

Deltayankeeboi:
NoBody cares about your sister or whoever she marries.

so why are men coming to my father's house to ask her hand in marriage with all their cheap wine

Mgbadike80:
If the man is of sound character and focused in life then the answer is yes. My sister should work to support her husband, she's not a piece of furniture in his home. I believe that's what the bible said too.

Well spoken...

lilwetdick:


if you have a sister, will your father allow a man earning 30k to marry your sister? pls be realistic

i strtd with npower 30k
i got married...if u see my weddin pics u wl think i spent 2M
and we only use our church curton to mk good decoration outside
and wt nice asho offi of 30k both...every man fr der got a drink and rice
na only 60ppl i invite.

my house rent is 80k well my ppl supported me weller plus i got som of d chairs
and fan frm der houses.

I had 40k left aftr weddin so i bought enough food fr lik 2mnths and we managed
with fish.

Church i select d one close to my house..so na treckin sure pass.

i later got a teachin job of 35k, 30k npower den my wife strtd supplyin bankers
shirt n trousers n shoes...base on say na lag she grow so she quick fix her sef wt
d buz idea..

so total income was about 90k per month and thank God npower didnt stop payin me
(na God go forgive me).

All arrenge like 6mnths after weddin.

Na wen u dey single u go dey shame hustle..but wen u marry..ur head go correct.

Mgbadike80:
according to a report on BBC pidgin, 20% of Nigerian graduates start out on salaries less than 20k, very few gets to earn 100k. yet people survive with families. many families living in the rural areas where land is cheap or they inherit land even build their own homes with such income. You're not been realistic, people won't stop living their lives because they're poor, rather they plan and work their way out of poverty. Any Nigerian youth still single above the age of thirty might end up having fertility issues or trouble raising a family when older and weak. the wise don't run away from their live problems, they plan on how to tackle and conquer it.

Fact...Just 5 years ago, I know how much I earned. 5 years after, I know how far I have come.

Thiwalade:


Gentleman/lady, you or anyone cannot predict my future. That someone else failed to make it, doesn't mean I will fail too. Thanks.

You are doing a PhD?
Awesome

Ajuju

It depends the type and kind of lady. Where I stay, with 15k self you fit feed well monthly. If you have 30k, that means you can save like 10k monthly. Let guys put their heads down. There are better ladies who can accept a good and ambitious guy who doesn't earn up to 20k monthly. But it is hard to see them.

Yes or no. Dem no fit answer. But they are quick to elaborate boring stories

Ryan03:
na wa o, shared yard you say? Like excuse you, my parents never lived in such environment hence we didn't either. So my sister will wake up now and marry a man that is living in a face me I slap you house? Make everybody marry according to their levels na, you can't be earning 30k and planning to marry a lady earning 150k. Find someone in your level and nobody go hear noise. All these posts up and down sef

nonsense person, keep forming what you are not. the same you who earns less than 47,000 naira and impregnated a lady, and manages to send 15, 000 naira to your poor mother every month, is here forming rich

lilwetdick:


because it worked for you does not mean it will work for all

there are still many struggling families in Nigeria who will never make it.

I agree 100% about many struggling families.
There are also many whose salaries ranges to millions per month yet there are suffering. If we make money the sole determinant readiness of a man getting married, then we have as well lost the sole purpose of marriage.

Those people who are suffering has so many questions to answer to themselves and to God.
Like what brought them together
How were they convinced to marry each other
Why did they start child bearing after knowing they financial state
Where do they live
What's their income and expenditure
What's their savings like
Any side hustle etc

Late thirties to forties you are no longer in your prime. And if you don’t have substantial money or something very meaningful to offer at that point in your life, no young girl in their 20s will marry you. That’s why when some men talk about having all the time in the world I laugh. It’s better to settle down early with more options, because there’s no guarantee you will make it in life by the time you are 39.

Mgbadike80:
That mumu mindset is why we have so many overaged ladies in their late thirties and forties desperate to get married while been bitter with themselves and menfolk in general. It's like saying that if a lady is earning 30k or less monthly, she has no business getting married. Thank God that as a man, even in my late thirties, i can easily marry a lady of my choice and age. The selective ladies should enjoy their choices with the risks involved.

Mgbadike80:
you can get self contain apartment in outlying areas of Onitsha for 60k a year (or more sha), public yards with shared facilities costs less. They should plan tgeir lives accordingly, and stop assuming that the lady is unemployed, she should get her own 30k job. how much do you think a man should be making before thinking of marriage?

Come and rent my landlord self contain in ph for 270k

lilwetdick:


100k with career growth..that is the man ready for marriage.

100k monthly...1.2 million annually also career growth.....opportunity to earn more in 3-4 years.

Lol.... Funny enough I fit into this cart but honestly I can't get married even with the 100k. Anyway I think location matters too.

vickydankal:
Past few days has been funny, regarding age, financial stability and economic state a man must attain before talking marriage.

Let me tell a bit of myself. .....

I met my husband in his final year he promised me marriage after a year of service, his salary then was 10k, yes 10k. He proposed and engaged me in his mum's face me I slap you house. My family rejected him at first, because of his dressing, financial status and his house. No much property.

I saw a future with him we will build together, I saw myself as part of his vision builder. I knew my calling was to help him achieve his goals and vision thereby achieving mine.

It took 5 years of struggle, pains, mockery and frustration. But we remained together. Today to the glory of God there's a change of story. We literally feed and pay salary to many of our mockers then .

From mine experience, a good and faith woman has God given discernment to know men with future and also to know if they belong there.

30k is not too small to begin life, though many things must be taken into account. When to begin child birth, number of children, type of housing, property, savings, side hustles etc with wisdom, love, understanding and God's grace backing your efforts you will succeed just a matter of time., that's if you overcome association of village people on time. It is because of excess comfort on the side of the men before marriage that's why many men take their wives as part of their properties.

I have joint account with my husband, most of our major properties are written in both of our names. I have a say in the home, I have earned my dignity and respect. Through thick and thin, so no man can shuush me down. I paid the price in full.

I'm not saying we have achieved everything in my own marriage, I'm saying, if you see a man God fearing, with the qualities you want and with a vision that can house your own vision as a lady, it is not a bad idea. But be ready to be insulted, mocked by family and friends. Let down your guild and roll up your sleeves and work. Forget slay mama and slay queen did later in life. Pay the price...

Too much expectations has kept many unmarried for years. It is not too good to leave all the financial burdens of the home to the man. He is not God, if you are his help meet come low and help him and not expect range rover every birth day.
The amount of salary shouldn't be the only determinant factor. Leadership, management, self control and goals acccessment should be vital on both man and his wife.

This is your personal experience and that is fine, but does not apply to many people

There are many variants to consider in this thing; where do you live? What is the standard of living in that state? What era was this? If you got married with 10k/month salary under GEJ, your story will be different from under Buhari. 10k in Gombe, Ebonyi, Benue, Osun will take you farther than 10k take Abuja, Lagos, Port-Harcourt.

Was there any other properties? Landed property for instance, is an advantage over someone without landed property living with that 10k.

I know a lady who married a man with little, they lived in a face me I face you in Abuja, she was hustling hard but barely making it, eventually, the man died of meningitis 6 years into their marriage, the ventilation was poor in the house and it led to the meningitis. Thankfully, she has been doing well for herself and her son, but she has no husband now, no be say dem no warn her that time.

To Each their own, there is no one formula for these things. I cannot say because my mother married my father in the 90's, when he was on 5k salary, then I can marry someone on 5k salary today and all will be well. Times are different and we cannot be selfish.

How much is the girl earning herself

There's no formula to these things. What I know for sure is that you can plan and scheme all you want, but you can't outsmart life. Life would happen to you when and how it chooses.

lilwetdick:
this is just nonsense

this what i hate to read, the pity and emotional game, the story that everything can end just in a day.

getting rich and going broke is a process, it just not start and end in a day

but how can you be earning 30k and be in marriage.

i cant allow a man earning 30k to marry my sister..simple as abc

Just pray that your sister does not meet and fall in love with a man that earns 30k per month because some ladies, once they are in love they will not mind marrying such a man, despite whatever opposition their family members might have to such marriage.
Our society also does not help matters in such issues as there are no form of social security available to help such poor people live a decent life.

It's time, we have to understand that, money is nit the most important thing in marriage but understanding and true love

There are people earning 6digists as salaries yet their happiness is not I the marriage but with another person outside

Marriage has so many things that makes it stands the taste of time

A man without job, but loving, caring, understanding and very matured can live peacefully with a woman who her income carry the family till the man gets something doing

But it comes with a price

You can't be in that penny less condition and be fucking around, treating your wife as if she is as good as a maid

Reporting her to your family and assassinating her character despite the load you left for her to carry

Now tell me, if a man humbles himself, who will know how the family is being handled

Thier are other people, earning higher yet frustrating their wives at home

Then she in turn will make sure the house will be too hot to accommodate you

What happens in such situations

39k or not, the major thing is one heart for the two of them

Someone earning 1k a month can marry na. Provided both parties love each other and want to suffer together. Some marriages bring blessing, some bring suffering. Na una sabi.

To me this life is a gradual process,30k earner can marry.
Av read all the comment but wot I notice was that most people that comment are unemployed..
U can start ur family with 30k but try and look for another source of getting additional money apart form ur monthly salary...

Mgbadike80:
If the man is of sound character and focused in life then the answer is yes. My sister should work to support her husband, she's not a piece of furniture in his home. I believe that's what the bible said too.

How would you feel if after getting married, your sister comes constantly to you or your father to ask for foodstuffs and handouts always ?
Even looking unkept and not well taken care or ...hmmm?

vickydankal:


I agree 100% about many struggling families.
There are also many whose salaries ranges to millions per month yet there are suffering. If we make money the sole determinant readiness of a man getting married, then we have as well lost the sole purpose of marriage.

Those people who are suffering has so many questions to answer to themselves and to God.
Like what brought them together
How were they convinced to marry each other
Why did they start child bearing after knowing they financial state
Where do they live
What's their income and expenditure
What's their savings like
Any side hustle etc

no time to be asking god questions

the reality is that money is very important in marriage. what can 30k do in a marriage when inflation rate is 11.32%

there is house rent to pay
transportation to pay
furniture
feeding

these are some of the expenses to cater for, how will this man save for marriage with 30k.

ChieduJoshua081:

Yeah it's not new . There are over 1million people who are poor in Nigeria. So they shouldn't get married and just waste away abi? Many of our parents are hoping that we will take them out of poverty that's why they gave birth to us. They can't just waste away like that because they are living poor. OK ? By the way am not married or thinking of it yet although I won't condemn anybody who goes ahead to marry. Just leave them alone.

but why do sensible guys like u hide from nairaland. We will be looking for comments like yours instead the dumb fools are the ones always online. But I understand, u have to work but the lazy fools are online steadily spreading their ignorance. Hand go meet them soon. Shey my rich friend who just died 2weeks back left wife and kids with cars, na now him rich wife go Know say na God dey take care of children not salary. I hail bru

Lol...It all boils down to lifestyle, exposure and environment.

There are people who earn less and have families with it...for others it's not even enough for their dogs.

Find the side of the divide you are and you'll be just fine.

safarigirl:


This is your personal experience and that is fine, but does not apply to many people

There are many variants to consider in this thing; where do you live? What is the standard of living in that state? What era was this? If you got married with 10k/month salary under GEJ, your story will be different from under Buhari. 10k in Gombe, Ebonyi, Benue, Osun will take you farther than 10k take Abuja, Lagos, Port-Harcourt.

Was there any other properties? Landed property for instance, is an advantage over someone without landed property living with that 10k.

I know a lady who married a man with little, they lived in a face me I face you in Abuja, she was hustling hard but barely making it, eventually, the man died of meningitis 6 years into their marriage, the ventilation was poor in the house and it led to the meningitis. Thankfully, she has been doing well for herself and her son, but she has no husband now, no be say dem no warn her that time.

To Each their own, there is no one formula for these things. I cannot say because my mother married my father in the 90's, when he was on 5k salary, then I can marry someone on 5k salary today and all will be well. Times are different and we cannot be selfish.

I agree with you. There is no one way to this. To each their own fate. But I believe if you choose the right man or women it will solve so many things. Maybe my experience is making me to be one sided.

U have to start from somewhere.

lozanni:


Just pray that your sister does not meet and fall in love with a man that earns 30k per month because some ladies, once they are in love they will not mind marrying such a man, despite whatever opposition their family members might have to such marriage.
Our society also does not help matters in such issues as there are no form of social security available to help such poor people live a decent life.

to be realistic, i pray too but i will give that man problem so that he can hustle well.

lilwetdick:


but this is poverty.

Seconded