frozen70:



I appreciate your bravery

If you want to marry her, inform keep it away from your family, don tell your mum

Just go ahead

Make sure you she takes her drugs, follow her to the hospital where she gets her drugs, they will advise you on how to watch yourself

After birth she will breast feed for three months then stop.

If your family ask why she stopped breast feeding, tell them you don't want the breast to slack that the baby can survive on infant formula

Lol@ breast to slack. E don turn to rubber band
Nairaland!!! I hail thee

ghettochild4u:
I can see so much people are still in dark age n not enlightened bout hiv...
Ya all shd change ur mentality...
Take South Africa as a case study...
People are marrying those with hiv and are living positively.. Infact, any hiv person in Nigeria shd inbox me....
I wouldn't mind marrying one

Chairman!!!

Salute and gunshots to you!!!

After you na you

Palehair:

So because someone has HIV, it means the person is promiscuous. Another stupid assumption

are you a victim? because the way you carry my opinion for head than your destiny is amusing


no HIV carrier are ordained Prophet. your mumu na Grade 1

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

Since 2007,meaning she following up with her medications. U have less chances of getting infected.

Treat her like a Queen,anytime devil wan give u wrong feelings,always imagine if many get am and she agreed to be with you.

Good luck and no forget to tell us when she finally gives birth for the owambe rice ...

Theoutsider:
If you had HIV and she was clean. Most likely she would not go out with you.

But because many men here are brain washed into thinking they must "bite the bullet" They make their penis do all the talking.

It amazing how many men use religion or archaic thinking to subject them selves already difficult times.

Also, the lack of control to not wear a condom.

Only self aware high functioning people get to know this. You can't really help men out of it. That's how nature wanted it from the beginning. Great point but still it doesn't change anything

musachara:

You really don't have to quote me while making your point especially when our views differ

ohhh kayy

Remaboy:
[s][/s]
I advise you not to pay heed to an uncouth person
Cc Crazeman03

I suggest you reduce the slut shaming attitude towards the lady bro, life is too short!

Dude I would have given you a piece of advice but advice is cheap, as everybody offers it but until you fall into the shoes of this young man, you will never know that coming to terms with Life is difficult, knowing you will die by installment.

You are foremost African, Child birth is a big deal, parents, friends and all that are difficult to ward off during Omugwo, and during times your baby will be colic and family, people asking you to feed the baby.

You can not hide here believe me, except fortuitously she is the type that produce no milk or lactate hardly.

If you ignore both, grow a thick skin to seething eyes, low tone murmurs/gossips and

Secondly, be ready to look over your shoulder concerning your health until you die or at least until there is a cure.

It is so easily explained off when the lady is the victim, but when it is the guy, it is a different story.

I will apprise you of the far reaching implication of some the decision you intend to take:

1. You will not be able to accept any job offer in some companies based on your status if positive.
2. You and your wife will be separated if you happen to get any job in the Gulf and other countries as she will not be given permanent residence due to her health status and if they come to know, you will loose your job due to high health risk classification.
3. Your kids are not safe, as you will worry over their status too and would worry sick every time they are sick whether cleared or not.
4. Be ready to invest emotionally with her status
5. Be prepared financially for health, treatment and other opportunistic treatment

If after all these, you decide to wife her, remember you get her to admit in official document that she was positive, and when you did contract the disease, that she also confirm she infected you with you.

Future is blurred in many words, and your sacrifice is easily misconstrued for wickedness when push comes to shove.

make sure she takes her drugs, keep her viral load low, check often as you could afford it and reduce the chances of you getting infected. Do not have sex when you are sore or she is sore down there, God help you, you will be fine.

Fafesot:


I didn't want to give any response initially but let me enlighten you a little.This is not a matter of not being normal but you not being logical .
Accepted that not every positives contracted through sex but ,how many people have you seen that contracted it through any other means.
I don't see any reason why you should jettison the obvious and go for the minute.Would you date anyone with the virus,I'm sure you wouldn't.
And next time,learn how to politely respond to stuffs without any intention to demean the other person.

i know of a person that got it from needle.. what about that?

andyanders:



Don't be surprised that u might die b4 both of them and they end up reading and superving ur burial program.

this one u are now, is it life Walking corpse

DanseMacabre:
Lol.

So the family people you're debating whether to tell or not, na them go breastfeed the pikin for am

If she not breastfeeding her child is the bone of contention here, I see no reason why it should be an issue. I believe there are a host of alternatives in place of that.

As regards breastfeeding ur baby, she'll definitely breastfeed the baby but the baby will have to take a drug called Nevi within 72hrs of birth and b4 sucking at all and after 6weeks, DBS test is carried out on d baby to know his/her status. Once baby comes out negative, he/she will be using septrin daily till d very day he stops sucking breast.

Don't tell any member of your family. They won't support you one bit. For breastfeeding, some women do not secrete breast milk after delivery. You can use that as an excuse but u ve to be super supportive to succeed.

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

U don't need to disclose her status to anyone!

As long she's complying with her ARVs, U can't test positive.

As regards breastfeeding ur baby, she'll definitely breastfeed the baby but the baby will have to take a drug called Nevi within 72hrs of birth and b4 sucking at all and after 6weeks, DBS test is carried out on d baby to know his/her status. Once baby comes out negative, he/she will be using septrin daily till d very day he stops sucking breast. I wish u n wifey well

[s]

Dybala11:

I suggest you reduce the slut shaming attitude towards the lady bro, life is too short!

[/s]
Uncouth means "foul mouthed". A rude person is a rude person, regardless male or female.
Remove that puccy from your eyes.

Remaboy:
[s][/s]
Uncouth means "foul mouthed". A rude person is a rude person, regardless male or female.
Remove that puccy from your eyes.

You don't understand my comment, do you?? I'm only advocating for you to be civil, don't bring yourself to the low level of that bitch. PEACE!

And what's with the ''get laid picture'' na, I will never have any business with a nairalander outside this forum, too much scammers and immature people full this forum.

[color=#006600][/color]

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

bro you are doing well. God bless you. Please don't try to disclose to anyone, not even your mom. She might not be as understanding as you. The one you are talking about not being able to breastfeed, you can just come up with a lie that the doctor said her breast milk will purge the baby for now, by the time you know it, the child is grown, marry her and she will love you with all her life.

Dybala11:

You don't understand my comment, do you?? I'm only advocating for you to be civil, don't bring yourself to the low level of that bitch. PEACE!

No problem. That wan na old comment. This topic na since May 1st.

And what's with the ''get laid picture'' na, I will never have any business with a nairalander outside this forum, too much scammers and immature people full this forum.

Just a reminder to never let puccy enter your eyes.
Peace.

Remaboy:
No problem. That wan na old comment. This topic na since May 1st.
Just a reminder to never let puccy enter your eyes.
Peace.

Let what enter my eyes?? It's because you know nothing about me. Ciao!

Remaboy:
No problem. That wan na old comment. This topic na since May 1st.
Just a reminder to never let puccy enter your eyes.
Peace.

Let what enter my eyes?? It's because you know nothing about me. Ciao!

Don't be afraid! She can breastfeed the baby it will have effect on the baby, that's if she so wish . And the baby will not be infected.
And you dont need to tell of your family members, tell God he's still in the business of healing.

If this story is true, then you really tried ooo. I don't know that there are men that can sustain erection while knowing it is about to be dipped into hiv infected partner.

The deed has been normal. Normal newly married couples have issues/differences in the first 2 years of marriage, issues that most ppl regret marrying their partners. I wonder if this marriage will survive it knowing one partners has strong reasons not to go ahead with the marriage in the first place.

As for breastfeeding, get advise from health care practitioners. Breastfeeding is not a must. I did not breast feed despite that I tried cos the milk started running 2 weeks after childbirth and by then my baby has gotten used to infant formula. He was a heavy eater and very impatient to suck the breast having gotten used to flowing formula from feeding bottle. I don't think it is something you should care about, but I must tell you than feeding infant formula was very expensive. A tin of SME gold was 3k and my baby finish 1 in 3 days or less. Calculate it for 3 months plus Pampers and the rest.I just hope you are rich enough to cater for these expenses and her health.

What you should be more concerned now is how she will carry the baby as pregnant women immunity naturally goes lower than it was.

I wish you luck.

eni4real:
for lust!

I never said he did right. for him to go that far with hiv patient, he is courageous

Don't ever tell anybody in your family, the best thing is to live far away from family from period when your wife will deliver and nurture the child to about a year when no one will detect she is not breast feeding the child.

oshorstan:



I never said he did right.
for him to go that far with hiv patient, he is courageous

Blind Courage

My dear don't be afraid only continue to persuade her to continuously take her drugs. There is a drug they give to a newborn baby without being infected so she can breast feed her baby no fears. So long as she can breastfeed ur baby dont disclose her status to anyone be COURAGEOUS.

Goddys:
I will say my mind plainly and not pretend like all the above commenters except emyrald91



Why would you have unprotected sex with HIV+ in the name of love even if she has low viral load?


Why entangle your life with unnecessary risks and liabilities because of love?

Do you think she wouldn't walk away if you were the carrier?

I am selfish when it comes to issue like this because it is my default state as a human being.

She didn't disclose it till 7th month when she noticed she had captured your heart.

This is exactly what happens when men don't take redpills, the likes ubunja has been selflessly administering here


I won't advise you. Advise yourself

So many people have unprotected sex even without knowing the status of their partner.
What if the lady didn't disclose her status to him?

Pls let's be reasonable with our comments.

Remaboy:
[s][/s]
I advise you not to pay heed to an uncouth person
Cc Crazeman03

Because someone beg for money makes them uncouth? Black man. She acted like one though with her comment

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

She can breastfeed since her viral load is low but the baby will do a DBS test at 3 weeks, 6 months and a strip test lastly to ensure he or she doesn't contract the virus. She should let the doctor know she's pregnant when next she goes for her refill so she can be linked to PMTCT, probably change her drugs to ensure the baby doesn't contract the virus before and during delivery. It's your decision, your family mustn't know because they will surely kick against it and stigmatise her. If she compliments you then marry her and encourage her to take her drugs.

eni4real:
Stigmatization of mentally ill and Epilepsy female is satanic too!!
You can go and fall in love with them!!

Men and overniceness!!!

Kindly reverse the case and see if any lady would be ready to go through such journey with you!!!

To some extent, it may be difficult to find a woman that can stand by a male victim. But one thing is sure... Tit for tat can never pay you.

Singing... love is blind, and it will take over your mind ... .
Mr are you ready for this lifetime burden you want to place on yourself?
Will a 60 yr old you be happy with the decision you are taking today? Are you waiting till you get into the HIV positive train from your explanation or do you think you can not eventually get the virus along the way? Think man, Think wit your head not your heart.

Crazeman03:
Hello Nairalanders, Hope you guys are staying Safe. Please don't mind my writing, I will make it short as possible.

I met this wonderful lady Last year and everything has been going good until 7 months ago when she told me she was Hiv+. That hit me hard but that didn't change anything, she was surprised I didnt react and opening up to me didn't scare me because I'm negative though we haven't had sex yet before the moment.

Now it has been 4 months we've been having unprotected sex. I'm not afraid of contracting the virus, as she keeps taking med and her viral load is low. I made sure before we went for test before having unprotected sex. Her CD4 count is above 750 and viral load is below 20, which makes hiv undetectable in her.

Now one night around 3months ago, she woke me up in the middle of the night to ask me, why do I love her knowing fully well about her status because she could not believe she will ever have a relationship with someone negative not even in this Nigeria by the way they stigmatize hiv+ people. I told her the reason and I'm not afraid hiv is not the worse or the baddest of diseases. There are more killer diseases than HIV and HIV is not a diseases but a virus. Only attack your immune system and its no longer a deadly virus.

The problem I have now is that whenever I imagine myself having it and how I will popping drugs everyday, make me kinda moody towards her, because I always keep telling her to always take her drugs. Last night she discovered she is pregnant and I'm just imagining things how everything will play out, I know when she will put to bed she won't be able to breastfeed. People will ask questions. I really need to tell someone in my family but I don't know who. My mom my react and the other person I trust is my younger sister.

On her own part, only her elder sister and brother knew she has the virus. And she had it since 2007.

I only need an advice if I need to tell any member of my family, looking to settle down with her this October.

Bro.... I want to say that you are a superhero for this singular act. Secondly, since her viralmcount is low and her immune is high, you will not contract the virus, just make sure she keeps taking her pills.
Thirdly, I will advice you keep her status as it is, you don't need to tell anyone else, it's not their life but, yours, it shouldn't be their issue cos it's yours, you knew what you were doing when you entered Into the relationship, and i'm glad thatbte girl in question is a honest person , she told you of her status even before you guys started hitting it, so you are very good to go... Marry her, she'll make a good wife.

Shalom