Ohamzee:
na una type go grow bear bear. u better give ur life to Christ and ask him to lead u. Him alone knows the way.

That's why someone should see a great danger and run into it.
Overbearing men are terrible.
I have a relation married to an overbearing man.
If she was not the cool type, the marriage would have broken apart since.

For the lady to be already complaining
She is the type that will not overlook or forbear. Then it's better she goes for an easy going, cool man.

deavicky:
If you don't like an overbearing man, let him go now.
But u won't, because most of u ladies always want to marry at all costs and will start pretend to manage what u don't like till things get out of hands.

For her to be asking about it.
She is the type that will not overlook or forbear. So she better find her square root now.

Macon1212:
As a mature man l will advise you to drop him, if not he will make your life miserable thank God you are not married, run for your life and look for another man please.

Op this is a matured man that has seen things in life.
Listen to his advice.

supereagle:

My wife remains the luckiest woman on earth. Her husband will enter the kitchen cook, she will eat and come back and tell him that you did not clean the cooker after cooking, see how you left the kitchen floor yamaya. She is the overbearing one at home. Some of you might want to say why must you enter the kitchen and cook? A gentleman or a Christain will not strife. Again, if you have a rebellious woman at home and you cannot change her, you learn to cope with her. I have started training my girl children how to handle domestic affairs when they grow up. Their mother cannot impart anything to them.

Hmmm.... This is very deep.
You Don enter no be small.
You must really be a person of great tolerance and patience.
E no easy.

ethicallyright:
He is not an "overbearing" male. He is a man.

Any creature who isn't female and can't dominate female folks is a simp.

One is either a man or a simp. Your man is the former.

I know it might feel satisfying as a man to believe this is right but it isn't. A true man regards the opinions of his woman and discerns if its appropriate before negating it. Remember, she isn't a slave but a helper. No one is an island of knowledge and no one is all wise. We need each other's counsel.

Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.

Hahahahaha
... RUN! he is one of those jerks who will rather be nothing if everything they need to excel is in the hands of a woman. unless you are or want to be a woman with no identity. most Times such men don't even have their shit together yet wouldn't take Jack, and long term they'll end up ruining your life along with theirs. girl Run!!

Munzy14:

For a man to be overbearing in a relationship, it speaks volume of how the lady assumes/takes things seriously. From this narrative he seems to be one of the few who really believe their is time for everything.


As far as he isn't possessive you've got yourself who can push you if you are lackadaisical towards serious issues.

You also have someone who can push u to achieve beyond.


Now what you need is to understand each other very well by firstly; Check his DOB and Yours Trace your zodiacs, read up very well to understand your compatibility.

Take advantage of your Lovy-dovy moments and have a heart to heart talk with him.

Also, find way to let him study your zodiacs and understand you as well.

It is not easy, but u rather be with that man that pushes/encourages you. Rather than the one that swallows all your excesses hook, line and sinker(simp).

God bless you richly for saying what others are too scared to say.
op should pls heed this advice, the best so far

Macon1212:
As a mature man l will advise you to drop him, if not he will make your life miserable thank God you are not married, run for your life and look for another man please.

OP if you refuse to listen to this because of desperation then OYO is ya case.

"Admin hide my identity " will not be far from you.

Zoie:

Gaslighting.
Alwaysachick, don't let it get to you.

Who is gaslighting?

You have to first talk with him about it. After that, build this very strong attitude of stubbornness. it should be your own way of trying to bend him. Pick quarrel with him whenever he becomes unnecessarily overbearing. If he doesn't bend after like three months, then he's a gunner.

Make him understand how you feel. If he does not change genuinely after that, simply call it a quit. Happiness is more important than a relationship; how much more a toxic relationship

Alwaysachick:



Even when its obvious he is being in considerate. What happened today? He told me to go change my laptop battery today. He wanted me to leave my house by 4pm to Ikeja. My house to Ikeja is like 2hrs journey. I tried to pacify him that I will go first thing in the morning but he insisted and started bringing up other talks.

You know the answer stop asking. You will end up frustrated if someone cannot consider what you want and always it has to be what they want. And you used a word he behaves as if you are disobedient. Are you dating your father, boss or a partner that shd see you as equal. Why forcing you to do what is not comfortable.

Better talk to yourself, this is a red flag for you, your mind doesn't want it. There are times to feed a man's ego, but if it has to be all the time, you go tire.

ethicallyright:

kneel and beg him. Pacify his damn ego if you love him. Submit to him.

SUBMIT to him, women are now differentiating between that word and slavery as well as suffering.

I must have wronged you terribly for me to go on my knees and beg you. If you meant what you said, you are a big time joker.

truthhurts2:
Doesn't matter what I think, or @forgness or @combination 123 or @petitejolie for that matter. None of can possibly know how it feels to be in your position and none of us have to live with the consequences of your decision.

I don’t understand wat you’re saying o

I can categorically tell u that when u get married u will loose my liberty.

You have been feeding his ego and now out of the blues u wanna starve the ego u've bn feeding all this while? Well done madam ego feeder. U dey see toxic relationship u wan still chuk ur head put. Use ur tongue count ur teeth.

[color=#770077][/color]i smell 8red,but complicated issues are always driven to the Almighty God.

petitejolie:
I don’t understand wat you’re saying o

I mean in this kind of situation, when series of people with different opinions surfaces, it is in best of the @OP Interest to choose wisely because, none of us are in her shoes (she's the only one that knows what damage this whole stuff is causing her) and none of us will be part of the consequences of her decision. So, she should choose wisely.

jornwhite:



Considering the fact that you're yet to marry, i concern your advice "da bii mo se da" in english "be as i be" ..
the only foul she sees in this guy is overbearing, humans are never to be perfect, the may concern is it LIFE THREATREN, if its not she can stand her ground and let the man umderstand what she wants, what a mature lady will do is place the man in a position he either change 4 good or exit.
Gud men with one foul are rare, victorian for how long were you single, was it easy finding the man you now claim 2 have .. how as it been so far is he 100% or perfect

Well thank God I'm not yet married.

Cos my whole existence is not screaming I want to marry any morafucka!

If marrying anyhow man is cool, why are people divorcing? Why are married couples killing and stabbing themselves? U think marriage is just wedding day? I laughed at your foolishness

Mind u, I have taste, very good taste in men. I don't date anyhow. I take my time on relationships.

So don't let my not been married give u headaches.

I believe in enjoyingy my man and our relationship.. Not just putting up with an overbearing asshole. God knows such kind of men. I won't give near how much more date.

relationships and marriage is meant to be enjoyed not endured and die in silence like some women do. I wish una luck but count me out!

Alwaysachick:
Good evening ladies in the house,

I have a friend he is every good thing but overbearing. He kept that part till we started dating. I don't have issues with a man wanting to be a man but when he does it to the extent your opinions don't count again and if you do otherwise even when you are right, it gets him angry. Shouldn't it be a thing of concern?

I've been feeding his ego but I think its getting out of hand. The relationship is getting serious but my fears have started building and im beginning to ask myself if I can cope??

Please help a sister, what can I do to stop this? Married women in the house with husbands with such traits how do you cope?

Should have have learnt from my parents but my father is the exact opposite and with my observations, his dad is also overbearing his sisters at always complaining.

Have you tried talking to your parents, about the issues you are having with the man, that you are in a serious relationship with?

whytediamond:


@bolded: she didn't say the man is a bad man, she only said he's self-imposing. If she cuts off from her man because of this singular failing, have you bothered to ask yourself. Na woman dey find man? Do you know if she's 35? Ok if she sees the "good man", is she a good woman to the good man? Or you think she's perfect?

You've not heard from the brother and your verdict is dissolution. I can bet my balls you're not married.

Why do you now think you qualify to ask a lady to quit her relationship? Ladies are enemies of their kind, masquerading as friends.

Think about it.

It took me 7years to get over the horrors of dating over bearing men, all in the name of I want to marry. God forbid I go down such lane again. Heavens forbid such men cross my path again.

And yes I'm 35! I don't see anything wrong in it. But Marrying a mismatch cos of age? That's a red flag to me. If I have my way I won't every marry sef ,or stick with any man. You think I care so much about being in a suffocating relationship cos of what people will say?

Lol then u don't really know me.

Getting married is the least of my problems.. It's not even a problem cos I'm the one placing a halt on it on several occasions when I couldn't cope with smiling and suffering kind of relationship. Cos majority of men out there are like grenades ready to blow off. I don't need such man stress! What I look for in relationship is peace of mind. Which I now have with my Boo. He's the only man, I'm comfortable with.

He's not perfect but at least he's not overbearing. He doesn't control, very easy going guy with a heart of gold. He's a breathe of fresh air. And such guys like him are rare. One can't help but love him. He was even the one who seek me out sef, cos i don't even have time for men and their wahala. And so far it's been peaceful all the way


For me o! I can't live with an overbearing man oreslse we will both break our heads one day. I hate stress of any kind. I have had my fair share of it in the past. But never again at this level of my life. Never again! But an easy going guy who loves peace does it for me. Or else lemme remain single for life!

Who overbearing man help? Smhhhhh.

It's not about how far but how well. At this stage of my life, after all the upheavals and trauma have passed through dating controlling and overbearing men? Abeg I don't need such men anymore. Let them go and marry other women and stress up their lives. I no come this life because of man.

I can only settle and be with an easygoing man. No two ways about it. My peace of mind is topmost. I don't joke with it

truthhurts2:
I mean in this kind of situation, when series of people with different opinions surfaces, it is in best of the @OP Interest to choose wisely because, none of us are in her shoes (she's the only one that knows what damage this whole stuff is causing her) and none of us will be part of the consequences of her decision. So, she should choose wisely.

well she should expect series of opinions. She wants d series of opinions to help her make a decision thats why she brought her story to a public space. And there cant be only one person going through a particular challenge in d world. There are people that have been there. Over bearing partners is not perculiar. There are a lot of them

I don't believe in coping either in a relationship or a marriage, it's better to let go and walk away, before it gets so physical and leads to something else. When it comes to matters of the heart, judgements can be clouded.

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djon78:



That's why someone should see a great danger and run into it.
Overbearing men are terrible.
I have a relation married to an overbearing man.
If she was not the cool type, the marriage would have broken apart since.

For the lady to be already complaining
She is the type that will not overlook or forbear. Then it's better she goes for an easy going, cool man.

true sha. Well i tell people to ask God for direction before going into marriage. A forebearing man may not even show those traits untill after wedding oh my friend. Its not written on the face. Alot of pretenders these days.

Ohamzee:
true sha. Well i tell people to ask God for direction before going into marriage. A forebearing man may not even show those traits untill after wedding oh my friend. Its not written on the face. Alot of pretenders these days.

True there are pretenders, but once someone begins to show some character before marriage. It's a red alert.
People rearly hide there true nature.

I have seen what overbearing men can do to a woman in marriage. And how the women later revenge back, when the children are grown up.

I have also seen easy going men that built unique and wonderful family. See bad thing no good at all.

[/quote]

petitejolie:
well she should expect series of opinions. She wants d series of opinions to help her make a decision thats why she brought her story to a public space. And there cant be only one person going through a particular challenge in d world. There are people that have been there. Over bearing partners is not perculiar. There are a lot of them

of course, you are damn right, there is a saying that "nothing ever gets healed if you keep it covered up", but you know sometimes, when most responses you are getting are not align with what you really wants to hear you get confused. [b][/b] Overbearing person? For me is hell no.

And I have found in my experience people rarely change. And when they do, they're not to be trusted

truthhurts2:
well she should expect series of opinions. She wants d series of opinions to help her make a decision thats why she brought her story to a public space. And there cant be only one person going through a particular challenge in d world. There are people that have been there. Over bearing partners is not perculiar. There are a lot of them of course, you are damn right, there is a saying that "nothing ever gets healed if you keep it covered up", but you know sometimes, when most responses you are getting are not align with what you really wants to hear you get confused. [b][/b] Overbearing person? For me is hell no.

And I have found in my experience people rarely change. And when they do, they're not to be trusted

it’s better to be practical about it. Now she knows this is who he is can she cope with it or not.

Alwaysachick:


If i keep pacifying him and he has no control again, won't it lead to physical or public abuse one day? What If he raises his voice at me in public one day?

Just break up with him... You'd get tired in the end... I have been there before.... I told him once and for all that I couldn't continue this relationship... He started threatening me oo... I was like is it by force to be in a relationship ni... I promised my future children a very simple father not this one...

ethicallyright:
kneel and beg him. Pacify his damn ego if you love him. Submit to him.

submit to who? is he her husband? she has a choice to walk away

Just come meet me, I am a very good man, many girls have testified. Infact, they said I was too good to have them.