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Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? - Romance - Nairaland

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Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by sirjamesjnr(m): 2:39am On Nov 14, 2020
So I have this conversation with some group of like minds and these are what I could get from our discussion:
On the negative side;
1.Abuse and manipulation
2.Disrespect and devaluation
3.Constant complaints and criticism
4.Feelings of perpetual inadequacy and failure to meet unrealistic expectations (I deal with that enough at work; I don’t want it at home)
5.Being ignored
6.Being cheated on
7.Being lied to about her level of sexual involvement with others (not in the sense of cheating, but potential exposure to STDs)
8.Being unloved, uncared about, and taken for granted
9.Not being allowed to make mistakes
10.Not being allowed to have my hobbies
11. Being treated like a piece of meat
12. Being expected to put up with his/her endless bullshit (which is usually deal-breaker stuff) while simultaneously not being allowed to be human myself
13. Being subjected to skewed perceptions of reality and overreacting to stupid shit
14.constantly wondering when he/she’s going to dump me for reasons that are unknown to me
15. Trying to change or “fix” me
On the positive side:
1.Career- To achieve stability most people opt for an academic path with lasts till the mid-20s sometimes even till the late 20s. Post that, once they get that lucrative job/onsite opportunity they aspired for, they delay marriage. Marriage is considered a potential hindrance to professional success by many people.
2.Space- Everyone seeks independence, especially millennials. Long term relationship requires sharing of this space which people don't like
People are warier and warier of :

3.Compromises- Marriage, by definition, is living with another person. This is bound to require adjustment which isn't easy

4.Commitment - This freaks youngsters today. When you're dating in college, commitment comes easy. But marriage brings along a different set of responsibilities which need a commitment of the highest order

5.The process of arranged marriage- This is a makes to the list purely because it shrouds the sanctity of marriage. Girls seeking millionaires and guys seeking miss universes just disturbs the definition and sanctity of the institution

6.With the advent of feminism, women are more self-reliant than they have ever been. Therefore they too don't seek a partner for financial independence and postpone relationships.

Mine: Career and schooling. My girl still has her masters to deal with.
So ladies and gentlemen, why you are single?
How can we close the circle?

27 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Ahmed0336(m): 3:38am On Nov 14, 2020
If you ask me na who I go ask?

d mata wey you see so, e tey wey e start.....

no bi mi go talk am, e heavy for mouth.......


if u ask mi, na who I go askkkkkkkkkkkkk?

Economy di baddddd

37 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Bluntguy: 3:42am On Nov 14, 2020
.... because they are decent.

13 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Connected1: 4:35am On Nov 14, 2020
The Nigerian Economy isn't friendly at all, unless you are well to do and don't expect much from your partner then you won't enjoy the full benefits of dating instead you will be frustrated.
Everyone is a Gold digger right now.

259 Likes 17 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by ipobarecriminals: 4:51am On Nov 14, 2020
Money, joblessness

17 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by blinking001(m): 6:17am On Nov 14, 2020
As for me I really dont intend to close any circle. The times have changed and men got to change their sexual strategy too. A millennial woman doesnt deserve to be wifed up. Make them your baby mama for your own peace of mind and sanity.
Men being the romantics have always had the wealth and yet the world still remained a better place but immediately the female folks became emancipated they changed everything into this Amoral society we find ourselves today.
Women cannot handle wealth and power so it's better you let them burn into ashes or you save them with the baby mama strategy.

83 Likes 10 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by sirjamesjnr(m): 9:24am On Nov 14, 2020
blinking001:
As for me I really dont intend to close any circle. The times have changed and men got to change their sexual strategy too. A millennial woman doesnt deserve to be wifed up. Make them your baby mama for your own peace of mind and sanity.
Men being the romantics have always had the wealth and yet the world still remained a better place but immediately the female folks became emancipated they changed everything into this Amoral society we find ourselves today.
Women cannot handle wealth and power so it's better you let them burn into ashes or you save them with the baby mama strategy.
Don't you think it is an individual thing?

13 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by blinking001(m): 9:28am On Nov 14, 2020
sirjamesjnr:
Don't you think it is an individual thing?
Capital NO. exceptions doesnt discredit the doings of the majority.

35 Likes 5 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by sirjamesjnr(m): 9:43am On Nov 14, 2020
blinking001:

Capital NO. exceptions doesnt discredit the doings of the majority.
I think I will say am lucky or maybe you will need to change your circle and mingle with decent mind.

29 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by yahmohy27: 9:52am On Nov 14, 2020
Just waisting their time .
Time will come when some of them will be searching badly for who will be their husband/wife or urging to have at least a Child

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by sammyj: 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
wink
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Brandonx(m): 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
undecided
I'm not ready to get married because no lady has been able to prove to me beyond reasonable doubt the benefits of marriage.
I think men should only think about marriage when they are above 50 years you know close to retirement so you don't feel lonely later.

48 Likes 8 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Esseite: 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
Why people are single is because most have built fairytales in their heads on how things should be.. both men and women.

39 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by officialfestus(m): 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by BIZNess123(m): 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
money
..

6 Likes 1 Share

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by gunners160(m): 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
First of all, I don't agree with your claim that so many decent people are still single. To agree with this claim means most of the people who are getting married are indecent / wayward.
Marriage to Me is a personal thing and everybody has reason why they want to be married and not want to be married.
Majority of guys crave for financial independence before marriage while majority of ladies care for getting a husband which matches dhr emotional and psychological state of mind. Being single or married is a mata of choice not about being decent or no

43 Likes 3 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by ILoveDemMANNA: 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
Decent people are not that good at manipulation .
They live in their world of old , full of ideals.
The field of approaching the opposite sex and pursuing through a fresh relationship is too much for them .
So they lag behind others in this race and obviously stay single .
They readily accept the offers they get in the hope of settling down with someone as and when it happens- they do not have the skills to push through their choices - because they never feel that skill is important in the first place.
This is because they believe in sustainable and enduring relationships , not based on physical attraction or manipulation , but based on genuine affection and understanding.

94 Likes 9 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Muhylonaire007: 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
Ok
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Enudapan: 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
Nah eh! No qualms
They should just start taking mushin weed
And the will be okay
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by parkervero(m): 9:53am On Nov 14, 2020
All of this? Local man open mouth still ..

But you guys get time to dey discuss this kind of long epistle.

1 Like

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by anochuko01(m): 9:54am On Nov 14, 2020
Abeg let the decent single guys and girls connect here jaree.

Personally, I feel decent people always want their decency to be rewarded by being with a fellow decent person. So they're very picky and don't mind being single for so long.


For me, It's hard finding a selfless person around. Most girl want to play smart on you and don't mind trampling on you to get whatever they want. Very painful thing.

38 Likes 4 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by PAWG(m): 9:54am On Nov 14, 2020
1, 3, 5, 7 and 10.

I can’t stand the constant calling and texting (stalking).

I like as I dey, I can’t come an be answerable to any girl cos of pvssy, cos I’m yet to meet one that can offer real value and space.

26 Likes 6 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by OB7Foreva(m): 9:54am On Nov 14, 2020
There's alot of dumb girls this days, who doesn't know what they want.

19 Likes 2 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by HalpyBee(f): 9:54am On Nov 14, 2020
1. By choice
2. Setting High standards
3. Lack of self improvement

2 Likes

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by NoFucksToGive: 9:54am On Nov 14, 2020
Simple

Most ladies out there are damaged goods

Over used , emotionally battered , low self-esteem, mentally poor, no ambition, addicted to instagram relationship coaches.

These set of over aged used up females are saddits, wake up singing gospel songs but yet she can nag to high heaven .

They accuse me of being lazy because I don't want to date a lady struggling financially just because I too don't struggle financially so I want a balance then they call me lazy for wanting this ?

All the 30 plus ladies are lying they are 24 years old .

They never look like the picture on their WhatsApp profile, when you see them in real life they look like the mother of the lady in the picture with too much make up

They speak good English but are dumb , the smart ones look like my uncle

When the smart ones are fine they have aggressive tendencies

Most Nigerian ladies sound like a confused mess of past opinions of their Exs

It's so much simpler not to deal with their shît and be single

Nigerian ladies are just tummy driven over arbortionized sperm waste bins

75 Likes 12 Shares

Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by mename: 9:54am On Nov 14, 2020
Most of the reasons listed there apply to me.
Re: Why Are So Many Decent People Single Nowadays? by Respect55(m): 9:55am On Nov 14, 2020
This one doesn't concern me.

3 Likes 1 Share

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