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I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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I'm Afraid Of My Girlfriend / I'm Afraid She May Woo Me / I Lost Him! What Do I DO Now Heartbroken (2) (3) (4)

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Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by yesloaded: 9:15am On Dec 11, 2020
TGM2015:

You have been saved from impending doom and possibly eternal regrets. Thank God for your Boss and forget the guy.

Meanwhile, you need to work on your work and boss so that you will have time for yourself. If at all you don't have prospective life partners to visit, try visiting you parents, sisters and brothers. You may also need those time for self reflections; life and career planning; physical, educational, and spiritual development; etc.
Well said

Babe sounds so desperate
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by chosengocap: 9:16am On Dec 11, 2020
RedPanthar:
The work end is where the first fixing should begin. Do this, and you will come back to testify :

1. Buy a ring and place it on your engagement finger. Make sure you only wear it where your boss would see it and watch your boss's reaction. You've been too germane and bland that you don't see your work callous during the weekend are specifically designed so you don't cultivate a relationship. I swear my hat on it you'll come back and say I said. So. Wear a ring and ensure your boss sees you flaunting it more than a few times.


2. Even when there's a heavy workload start asking for weekend breaks ahead before you'll be asked to work and again watch your bones reaction. The goal is to buy yourself space. As you play these games watch your boss's reactions




3. Pick your boss's calls less faster, less frequently. It's a masterstroke game to steal your availability from him and disorientation him from always assuming you're his go-go person he can summon whenever he pleases. All of thus is to stir things nd shake things up at the work end albeit subtly





4. Buy new clothes even if it's just two and try to put them on weekend or Fridays. Thus is to make them assume at work that whenever it's weekend they're disrupting your dates to force them psychologically to not call you upon demand. Make sure it's clothes they don't seem to see you frequently wear. Wear these and make sure you're gorgeous on weekend. The dressing that will make them ask why are you this elegant. Reply them on such occasions you were out on a date but since work demands were up you had to call it shut. Guilt trip their brains out and control the narrative at work



Now for the guy :

5. Love thrives in an atmosphere where there's a mutual resistant to beat. Now, paint the narrative to your guy that your boss seems to be against you both, and that's why he wants you occupied weekend and that you both would suffer. By making " the perception of your boss as the enemy ", you created a villain that makes the masculine willpower to fight in your guy rises up. Guess what else you'll get in advance, emotional support against when such arises again. Now, use this advantage to pull put his emotions and psyche to pull him out. When thus is done, you both have a common enemy or vision or objective and you can both use this to your advantage to bond and all. Be smart.




6. Force breaks at work


7. Pay him surprise visits


8. Be more frequent with video calls

9. Plan your meetings for Sundays. Relationships without physical contact will not stand the test of time


10. As a man he should do the visiting first especially at this beginning stage



Give him space and reach out to him. Relationships don't just end that fastly. No, it doesn't


He's hurting. Let him process his emotions. And when he reaches the place of thought that he wants to be with you inspite of what happened, he will establish contact.

You'll be fine








Very smart and good advice.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by gabicon: 9:18am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:
I'm a 24 year old lady living and working in Abuja. My job is very time demanding. I'm usually very busy on weekdays, and sometimes on weekends I can get called to work if something important comes up.

There is a guy I've known for months now. We met in Abuja at an event and we've been friends since. He lives in lagos but visits Abuja occasionally. He's also a very busy guy and he hardly has time on his hands. We have spent sometime together talking and getting to know each other but we haven't been on an official date. Most of our interaction has been over phone calls and WhatsApp text messages due to the distance barrier.

I fell in love with him during the course of our friendship. He is everything I want in a man. He's financially stable, very good looking and smart. The few times I've spent talking to him have been a pleasure, both for my eyes and for my mind. I never thought I could ever meet someone who checks all those boxes perfectly.

Men like him usually get a lot of female attention and I've tried to tread carefully. I didnt want him to see me as cheap but I also don't want him to think I am not interested in him. The day he told me he loved me was very memorable for me because I felt the same way. Few days later I told him I loved him too. Due to the distance barrier we could only talk on phone. I'm a very decent lady with good upbringing but because of what I felt for him, I did things I thought I'd never do. One night we had a sex chat that ended in me sending nudes to him. I've never done this before. This made me feel vulnerable and cheap because even though he said he loved me, I never believed him because he didn't really act like someone who was in love with me. He wasn't the type to call everyday and there were periods where he would dissapear for days and ignore my calls and texts and then return like nothing happened.

Last week we planned a special meeting. I was to travel to Lagos to see him at his place on Saturday morning. He had planned to refund me the money I'd use for my airline ticket and even hire a taxi that would bring me straight to his place from the airport. The way he sounded I knew he took it as a big deal. I agreed to come see him in lagos. On Friday morning he called and I assured him I was going to come. He called me again in the afternoon and I assured him I was going to come.

Towards the end of work on Friday my boss informed me that I had to be at work on Saturday to complete a very important project. Immediately I got the information I sent him a text. I was too tired when I left for home and I planned on calling him later that evening. I was so tired that I took a quick nap and woke up to missed calls from him. I called him back and asked if he got my message and he said he didn't. I informed him of the change in plans and he got very furious. He accused me of being indecisive and playing games. He said he had cancelled lots of meetings and spent money preparing for my visit and was disappointed that I didn't take him as seriously as he took me. He ended the call in annoyance and I've not heard from him since. He isn't picking my calls or replying my texts. I've sent him voice messages on WhatsApp apologizing and explaining myself but he hasn't replied..

I really love this guy and I don't want to lose him. He probably thinks I'm lying to him or that I have someone else I'm seeing but that's not the case.

It sounds more like this chap just wants to have sex with you, he knows how busy your schedule is, he knows you don't have a life outside work, why the deception complains?

Secondly in a game of chase and chased, the lion goes after the antelope not the other way round especially when it has to do with a first date. You hold all the cards if you are valuable to him he should come for you.

Thirdly, there are things once you put out there to can never take back, sending nudes is one of those things, you sound like a smart lady, behave like one.

Lastly, it not safe going to meet a person you barely know or your friends and loved once known in another city. Ladies have been raped and even killed doing this, please be safe and make safe decision.

1 Like

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Akinh: 9:19am On Dec 11, 2020
I Don't Know Why People Still Brings Relationship Issues To Nairaland,..Me Wey no get stable relationship like stable coin go advise u rightly ba?...and am very sure 98% of women on Nairaland are hypocrite..my dear lady relationship is personal research, u might like red and I might like blue ...so bringing ur red for me to advise on blue mood is wrong, and u re doom to be destroy, so advise yourself.

1 Like

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Maobichek: 9:19am On Dec 11, 2020
[quote author=odinson1 post=96930058]

Shiloh 2030 is calling your name grin grin[/quot
e]

Hahahahaaa!!! Did you listen to the testimonies last night? 95% were 20/30/35 years marital delay destroyed, God of Shiloh does wonders oh!

2 Likes

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by chosengocap: 9:19am On Dec 11, 2020
RedPanthar:





Do you love your life?


Ladies when you're in love you don't think straight. If you were related to me, I would be tempted to slap you. Honestly.


Why are you involved with a human being you can't trace to a place Jehovah God. Please. Make sure when he re establishes contact you tell him you would like to be creating pleasant surprise to make up for the wrong and use the opportunity to get his address



2. After you do, tell him the silence and hiatus made you worried you want to atleast know one or two of his friends or associates who can mediate between you two to appease him when things go awry. This is an opportunity to buy yourself more leverage




I may be wrong but it's not completely safe dating under this circumstances without anything to. Hold

Very true
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Koval12(m): 9:20am On Dec 11, 2020
RedPanthar:
The work end is where the first fixing should begin. Do this, and you will come back to testify :

1. Buy a ring and place it on your engagement finger. Make sure you only wear it where your boss would see it and watch your boss's reaction. You've been too germane and bland that you don't see your work callous during the weekend are specifically designed so you don't cultivate a relationship. I swear my hat on it you'll come back and say I said. So. Wear a ring and ensure your boss sees you flaunting it more than a few times.


2. Even when there's a heavy workload start asking for weekend breaks ahead before you'll be asked to work and again watch your bones reaction. The goal is to buy yourself space. As you play these games watch your boss's reactions




3. Pick your boss's calls less faster, less frequently. It's a masterstroke game to steal your availability from him and disorientation him from always assuming you're his go-go person he can summon whenever he pleases. All of thus is to stir things nd shake things up at the work end albeit subtly





4. Buy new clothes even if it's just two and try to put them on weekend or Fridays. Thus is to make them assume at work that whenever it's weekend they're disrupting your dates to force them psychologically to not call you upon demand. Make sure it's clothes they don't seem to see you frequently wear. Wear these and make sure you're gorgeous on weekend. The dressing that will make them ask why are you this elegant. Reply them on such occasions you were out on a date but since work demands were up you had to call it shut. Guilt trip their brains out and control the narrative at work



Now for the guy :

5. Love thrives in an atmosphere where there's a mutual resistant to beat. Now, paint the narrative to your guy that your boss seems to be against you both, and that's why he wants you occupied weekend and that you both would suffer. By making " the perception of your boss as the enemy ", you created a villain that makes the masculine willpower to fight in your guy rises up. Guess what else you'll get in advance, emotional support against when such arises again. Now, use this advantage to pull put his emotions and psyche to pull him out. When thus is done, you both have a common enemy or vision or objective and you can both use this to your advantage to bond and all. Be smart.




6. Force breaks at work


7. Pay him surprise visits


8. Be more frequent with video calls

9. Plan your meetings for Sundays. Relationships without physical contact will not stand the test of time


10. As a man he should do the visiting first especially at this beginning stage



Give him space and reach out to him. Relationships don't just end that fastly. No, it doesn't


He's hurting. Let him process his emotions. And when he reaches the place of thought that he wants to be with you inspite of what happened, he will establish contact.

You'll be fine





oh my dear. How can someone be this smart and articulative at the same time? This just made my day.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Maobichek: 9:23am On Dec 11, 2020
frozen70:


You don't need to stress yourself much about the whole thing

Love grows and it renews itself

You may still go to him and he will have good time with you and either continue the relationship or end it with style

You have explained yourself to him and don't harm yourself trying to prove your innocence

But bear in mind that long distance relationship has its own wahala

I will not advice anyone to go into long distance relationship, it hardly work out oh.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by MyPoint: 9:24am On Dec 11, 2020
You are indeed a great adviser.

I will follow you because of this sound advise.

RedPanthar:
The work end is where the first fixing should begin. Do this, and you will come back to testify :

1. Buy a ring and place it on your engagement finger. Make sure you only wear it where your boss would see it and watch your boss's reaction. You've been too germane and bland that you don't see your work callous during the weekend are specifically designed so you don't cultivate a relationship. I swear my hat on it you'll come back and say I said. So. Wear a ring and ensure your boss sees you flaunting it more than a few times.


2. Even when there's a heavy workload start asking for weekend breaks ahead before you'll be asked to work and again watch your bones reaction. The goal is to buy yourself space. As you play these games watch your boss's reactions




3. Pick your boss's calls less faster, less frequently. It's a masterstroke game to steal your availability from him and disorientation him from always assuming you're his go-go person he can summon whenever he pleases. All of thus is to stir things nd shake things up at the work end albeit subtly





4. Buy new clothes even if it's just two and try to put them on weekend or Fridays. Thus is to make them assume at work that whenever it's weekend they're disrupting your dates to force them psychologically to not call you upon demand. Make sure it's clothes they don't seem to see you frequently wear. Wear these and make sure you're gorgeous on weekend. The dressing that will make them ask why are you this elegant. Reply them on such occasions you were out on a date but since work demands were up you had to call it shut. Guilt trip their brains out and control the narrative at work



Now for the guy :

5. Love thrives in an atmosphere where there's a mutual resistant to beat. Now, paint the narrative to your guy that your boss seems to be against you both, and that's why he wants you occupied weekend and that you both would suffer. By making " the perception of your boss as the enemy ", you created a villain that makes the masculine willpower to fight in your guy rises up. Guess what else you'll get in advance, emotional support against when such arises again. Now, use this advantage to pull put his emotions and psyche to pull him out. When thus is done, you both have a common enemy or vision or objective and you can both use this to your advantage to bond and all. Be smart.




6. Force breaks at work


7. Pay him surprise visits


8. Be more frequent with video calls

9. Plan your meetings for Sundays. Relationships without physical contact will not stand the test of time


10. As a man he should do the visiting first especially at this beginning stage



Give him space and reach out to him. Relationships don't just end that fastly. No, it doesn't


He's hurting. Let him process his emotions. And when he reaches the place of thought that he wants to be with you inspite of what happened, he will establish contact.

You'll be fine





Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by boyjo: 9:25am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:
I'm a 24 year old lady living and working in Abuja. My job is very time demanding. I'm usually very busy on weekdays, and sometimes on weekends I can get called to work if something important comes up.

There is a guy I've known for months now. We met in Abuja at an event and we've been friends since. He lives in lagos but visits Abuja occasionally. He's also a very busy guy and he hardly has time on his hands. We have spent sometime together talking and getting to know each other but we haven't been on an official date. Most of our interaction has been over phone calls and WhatsApp text messages due to the distance barrier.

I fell in love with him during the course of our friendship. He is everything I want in a man. He's financially stable, very good looking and smart. The few times I've spent talking to him have been a pleasure, both for my eyes and for my mind. I never thought I could ever meet someone who checks all those boxes perfectly.

Men like him usually get a lot of female attention and I've tried to tread carefully. I didnt want him to see me as cheap but I also don't want him to think I am not interested in him. The day he told me he loved me was very memorable for me because I felt the same way. Few days later I told him I loved him too. Due to the distance barrier we could only talk on phone. I'm a very decent lady with good upbringing but because of what I felt for him, I did things I thought I'd never do. One night we had a sex chat that ended in me sending nudes to him. I've never done this before. This made me feel vulnerable and cheap because even though he said he loved me, I never believed him because he didn't really act like someone who was in love with me. He wasn't the type to call everyday and there were periods where he would dissapear for days and ignore my calls and texts and then return like nothing happened.

Last week we planned a special meeting. I was to travel to Lagos to see him at his place on Saturday morning. He had planned to refund me the money I'd use for my airline ticket and even hire a taxi that would bring me straight to his place from the airport. The way he sounded I knew he took it as a big deal. I agreed to come see him in lagos. On Friday morning he called and I assured him I was going to come. He called me again in the afternoon and I assured him I was going to come.

Towards the end of work on Friday my boss informed me that I had to be at work on Saturday to complete a very important project. Immediately I got the information I sent him a text. I was too tired when I left for home and I planned on calling him later that evening. I was so tired that I took a quick nap and woke up to missed calls from him. I called him back and asked if he got my message and he said he didn't. I informed him of the change in plans and he got very furious. He accused me of being indecisive and playing games. He said he had cancelled lots of meetings and spent money preparing for my visit and was disappointed that I didn't take him as seriously as he took me. He ended the call in annoyance and I've not heard from him since. He isn't picking my calls or replying my texts. I've sent him voice messages on WhatsApp apologizing and explaining myself but he hasn't replied..

I really love this guy and I don't want to lose him. He probably thinks I'm lying to him or that I have someone else I'm seeing but that's not the case.

Hahaha and you can't see he wants out and played it out perfectly by picking offense over nothing?

The moment you sent him your nude, you made a mistake.
Let me tell you how a guy's mind works; "She sent it to me, she sends it to others!"

But girl, your description of this guy, fits the description of a player perfectly.

1 Like

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by RedPanthar: 9:25am On Dec 11, 2020
hismerhill:


May God bless you sir. Me I know say reasonable people dey this forum, they only comment when necessity requires. God bless once more


Amen
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by jaxxy(m): 9:27am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:
@redpanthar

I can't pay him surprise visits because I don't know exactly where he stays. I've never visited him before. He lives in Lagos and I live in Abuja. All I know is that he stays somewhere in Lekki.

He isn't responding to any of my calls and texts.

I tried telling my boss that I had an engagement on Saturday but he refused because I had already taken two days off a week before due to ill health, and the project required my specialty. No one else at the office had the skill set to handle the project like I could and there was a deadline.

Besides I love u and nudes u whatelse do u know about this guy?? Do u know any confirmed information about him to be sure of who he is?

It’s crazy to me how u can fail inlove with a stranger, do u have mutual frnds, what type of person he is? Where he works? Where he lives beyond lekki? The way I see it this guy could be anybody even crazy person. undecided

He seems more concerned with his plans than ur work and job security? undecided that’s not love or how love works. That’s selfishness to the max! Especially after explaining. I don’t cares how many meetings he canceled he won’t be the 1st guy on the planet to be busy or cancel meetings. Many of us have done same thing and didn’t loose our senses. undecided

I see a lot of RED flags here and I feel this guy knows he has u wrapped around his fingers. While u have nothing bt naivety, feelings, butterflies in ur belly and taking serious risks for this stranger u fell inlove with.

U met him once, 2ce or more or spoken for months doesn’t mean he isn’t a stranger until u can ask him any question and get a truthful answer. undecided

Whatever u do don’t go to his house alone or sleepover, find a frnd in Lagos to stay with while u see him in a public place for a nice date and observe him properly. How people handle disappointments shows their real intentions. Trust me!!!

U seem abit desperate for a serious relationship thingy. Looks more like a sex hookup to me. undecided

Pls note I’m not trying to be insultive bt giving an idea into my guy instincts.

1 Like

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by RedPanthar: 9:27am On Dec 11, 2020
OJURONGBE1:



In as much as you made salient points but you're indirectly setting her up to be fired from her job unless her role is so important that she's irreplaceable.

I felt this way too towards someone who i have been friends with for 5years after our meet at NYSC Camp . We talk on the phone almost everyday, she shared her deepest secrets with me , introduced me to her family members whenever she come to Lagos, that i had to tell her last year when we met how i have grown fond of her and would love to date her . I thought she felt same way from the tone of her voice and the beam on her face , not knowing she still had a thing for one of her lover, who she is secretly begging to give her a second chance at love.



Whenadies miss the age gap of 22 and 26 to build relationships at the expense of work they suffer along time for it. A lot. She needs to reduce the dependency they have for her at work so she can begin to cultivate a relationship
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by MyPoint: 9:29am On Dec 11, 2020
I am following you because this sound and sincere advise.

RedPanthar:
The work end is where the first fixing should begin. Do this, and you will come back to testify :

1. Buy a ring and place it on your engagement finger. Make sure you only wear it where your boss would see it and watch your boss's reaction. You've been too germane and bland that you don't see your work callous during the weekend are specifically designed so you don't cultivate a relationship. I swear my hat on it you'll come back and say I said. So. Wear a ring and ensure your boss sees you flaunting it more than a few times.


2. Even when there's a heavy workload start asking for weekend breaks ahead before you'll be asked to work and again watch your bones reaction. The goal is to buy yourself space. As you play these games watch your boss's reactions




3. Pick your boss's calls less faster, less frequently. It's a masterstroke game to steal your availability from him and disorientation him from always assuming you're his go-go person he can summon whenever he pleases. All of thus is to stir things nd shake things up at the work end albeit subtly





4. Buy new clothes even if it's just two and try to put them on weekend or Fridays. Thus is to make them assume at work that whenever it's weekend they're disrupting your dates to force them psychologically to not call you upon demand. Make sure it's clothes they don't seem to see you frequently wear. Wear these and make sure you're gorgeous on weekend. The dressing that will make them ask why are you this elegant. Reply them on such occasions you were out on a date but since work demands were up you had to call it shut. Guilt trip their brains out and control the narrative at work



Now for the guy :

5. Love thrives in an atmosphere where there's a mutual resistant to beat. Now, paint the narrative to your guy that your boss seems to be against you both, and that's why he wants you occupied weekend and that you both would suffer. By making " the perception of your boss as the enemy ", you created a villain that makes the masculine willpower to fight in your guy rises up. Guess what else you'll get in advance, emotional support against when such arises again. Now, use this advantage to pull put his emotions and psyche to pull him out. When thus is done, you both have a common enemy or vision or objective and you can both use this to your advantage to bond and all. Be smart.




6. Force breaks at work


7. Pay him surprise visits


8. Be more frequent with video calls

9. Plan your meetings for Sundays. Relationships without physical contact will not stand the test of time


10. As a man he should do the visiting first especially at this beginning stage



Give him space and reach out to him. Relationships don't just end that fastly. No, it doesn't


He's hurting. Let him process his emotions. And when he reaches the place of thought that he wants to be with you inspite of what happened, he will establish contact.

You'll be fine





Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Maobichek: 9:29am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:


How?

Love is already in your head so you may not understand, please take your time and if he really loves you, you will know. Long distance relationship is not advisable OK, Lekki, Chevron estate, vgc etc are all something else. If he loves you, he will come back and when he comes back, don't be afraid to ask him specific and important questions, thank you.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Infoay: 9:29am On Dec 11, 2020
sunnitus:
You are gradually working too your grave unknowly, "he is the kind of Guy u want but he is not the calling type and you don't even believe it when he said he love you", yet you foolishly sent your nud to him. I don't why some ladies have fish brain, have you ever asked yourself whether he fancies you the same way you fancy him? Whether you are the kind of woman he want? He doesn't call and care less about u but you still love him, tomorrow now and you will come and say men are all heartbreakers. That guy now can use that nude pix to blackmail you, you need sense my dear sister.

You spoke my mind. Some girls will never learn or they may end up learning the hard way.

One of my female friends is currently trapped in an unhealthy relationship because the guy in charge had threatened to publish her nude pictures all over social media if she decides to walk out of this unhealthy relationship. The guy is seriously using it against her and also exploiting her in the inner room against her will most times. Please let's be good students of history so we can do things with caution.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Arckeen: 9:30am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:
@redpanthar

I can't pay him surprise visits because I don't know exactly where he stays. I've never visited him before. He lives in Lagos and I live in Abuja. All I know is that he stays somewhere in Lekki.

He isn't responding to any of my calls and texts.

I tried telling my boss that I had an engagement on Saturday but he refused because I had already taken two days off a week before due to ill health, and the project required my specialty. No one else at the office had the skill set to handle the project like I could and there was a deadline.
person help you type epistle like this . You no even fit say thank you first .
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Angy55(f): 9:31am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:
I'm a 24 year old lady living and working in Abuja. My job is very time demanding. I'm usually very busy on weekdays, and sometimes on weekends I can get called to work if something important comes up.

There is a guy I've known for months now. We met in Abuja at an event and we've been friends since. He lives in lagos but visits Abuja occasionally. He's also a very busy guy and he hardly has time on his hands. We have spent sometime together talking and getting to know each other but we haven't been on an official date. Most of our interaction has been over phone calls and WhatsApp text messages due to the distance barrier.

I fell in love with him during the course of our friendship. He is everything I want in a man. He's financially stable, very good looking and smart. The few times I've spent talking to him have been a pleasure, both for my eyes and for my mind. I never thought I could ever meet someone who checks all those boxes perfectly.

Men like him usually get a lot of female attention and I've tried to tread carefully. I didnt want him to see me as cheap but I also don't want him to think I am not interested in him. The day he told me he loved me was very memorable for me because I felt the same way. Few days later I told him I loved him too. Due to the distance barrier we could only talk on phone. I'm a very decent lady with good upbringing but because of what I felt for him, I did things I thought I'd never do. One night we had a sex chat that ended in me sending nudes to him. I've never done this before. This made me feel vulnerable and cheap because even though he said he loved me, I never believed him because he didn't really act like someone who was in love with me. He wasn't the type to call everyday and there were periods where he would dissapear for days and ignore my calls and texts and then return like nothing happened.

Last week we planned a special meeting. I was to travel to Lagos to see him at his place on Saturday morning. He had planned to refund me the money I'd use for my airline ticket and even hire a taxi that would bring me straight to his place from the airport. The way he sounded I knew he took it as a big deal. I agreed to come see him in lagos. On Friday morning he called and I assured him I was going to come. He called me again in the afternoon and I assured him I was going to come.

Towards the end of work on Friday my boss informed me that I had to be at work on Saturday to complete a very important project. Immediately I got the information I sent him a text. I was too tired when I left for home and I planned on calling him later that evening. I was so tired that I took a quick nap and woke up to missed calls from him. I called him back and asked if he got my message and he said he didn't. I informed him of the change in plans and he got very furious. He accused me of being indecisive and playing games. He said he had cancelled lots of meetings and spent money preparing for my visit and was disappointed that I didn't take him as seriously as he took me. He ended the call in annoyance and I've not heard from him since. He isn't picking my calls or replying my texts. I've sent him voice messages on WhatsApp apologizing and explaining myself but he hasn't replied..

I really love this guy and I don't want to lose him. He probably thinks I'm lying to him or that I have someone else I'm seeing but that's not the case.

My dear, please forget about him. He was only in for the sex. Who knows? He might even be married, you wouldn't know. He might have told his wife he has a business meeting somewhere just to plan for the meeting that weekend and the disappointment came in.
I know you hurt so bad but relax you're going to be fine.

My advise, get busy like never before. You will get over him.

Another advise, please don't get involved in a long distance relationship unless you are jobless or you have your own business that you are managing that would allow you travel at any time. Abuja to Lagos is too far, unless you guys were already dating before work separated the both of you.

1 Like

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by seanwilliam(m): 9:31am On Dec 11, 2020
techmo:
cool




Flip the coin and ask yourself the same questions ...


If you were a guy, and a lady cancelled plans of visiting you without prior notice how exactly would you react?!

You can't assume he loves you or not, just because of sexchat and phone conversation, you guys need to spend time together


He's agreed to pay atleast 150k in Air ticket,
10k Uber around town
Atleast 30k for weekend grooving in Lagos

Olosho at Admiralty way Lekki won't cost him more than 20k, so if he was just after pvssy I think he has far cheaper option


..
gbayi. God bless your two parents for me... lot of simps and emotional fools on this thread

1 Like

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by boyjo: 9:31am On Dec 11, 2020
RedPanthar:



I swear down. It's an overreaction. Not considering he's making her worried sick. The guy no try

He wants out.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Arckeen: 9:31am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:


My face wasn't visible.
dem Dey advice you. U Dey make mouth yenyenyen
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by boyjo: 9:34am On Dec 11, 2020
hustla:
LOOOL he's not the calling type and disappears for days

That guy has a serious relationship somewhere.. This one jus deh deceive insef

It is just too plain to see

1 Like

Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by moshino(m): 9:35am On Dec 11, 2020
[quote author=LucyB24 post=96924704]One night we had a sex chat that ended in me sending nudes to him.


Did he also send you his nude pics as well? If not, then you're a big fool and a hoe, let's start there.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Noblewealth(m): 9:36am On Dec 11, 2020
my stance tho, It doesn't make any sense at all whether the face is shown or not.. Don't engage in it.. I don't know why many of them don't learn from others mistakes not ontil they fall victims too...
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Nobody: 9:36am On Dec 11, 2020
RedPanthar:
The work end is where the first fixing should begin. Do this, and you will come back to testify :

1. Buy a ring and place it on your engagement finger. Make sure you only wear it where your boss would see it and watch your boss's reaction. You've been too germane and bland that you don't see your work callous during the weekend are specifically designed so you don't cultivate a relationship. I swear my hat on it you'll come back and say I said. So. Wear a ring and ensure your boss sees you flaunting it more than a few times.


2. Even when there's a heavy workload start asking for weekend breaks ahead before you'll be asked to work and again watch your bones reaction. The goal is to buy yourself space. As you play these games watch your boss's reactions




3. Pick your boss's calls less faster, less frequently. It's a masterstroke game to steal your availability from him and disorientation him from always assuming you're his go-go person he can summon whenever he pleases. All of thus is to stir things nd shake things up at the work end albeit subtly





4. Buy new clothes even if it's just two and try to put them on weekend or Fridays. Thus is to make them assume at work that whenever it's weekend they're disrupting your dates to force them psychologically to not call you upon demand. Make sure it's clothes they don't seem to see you frequently wear. Wear these and make sure you're gorgeous on weekend. The dressing that will make them ask why are you this elegant. Reply them on such occasions you were out on a date but since work demands were up you had to call it shut. Guilt trip their brains out and control the narrative at work



Now for the guy :

5. Love thrives in an atmosphere where there's a mutual resistant to beat. Now, paint the narrative to your guy that your boss seems to be against you both, and that's why he wants you occupied weekend and that you both would suffer. By making " the perception of your boss as the enemy ", you created a villain that makes the masculine willpower to fight in your guy rises up. Guess what else you'll get in advance, emotional support against when such arises again. Now, use this advantage to pull put his emotions and psyche to pull him out. When thus is done, you both have a common enemy or vision or objective and you can both use this to your advantage to bond and all. Be smart.




6. Force breaks at work


7. Pay him surprise visits


8. Be more frequent with video calls

9. Plan your meetings for Sundays. Relationships without physical contact will not stand the test of time


10. As a man he should do the visiting first especially at this beginning stage



Give him space and reach out to him. Relationships don't just end that fastly. No, it doesn't


He's hurting. Let him process his emotions. And when he reaches the place of thought that he wants to be with you inspite of what happened, he will establish contact.

You'll be fine





boss I need your advice
On something could you reach out to me boss
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by heniford2: 9:38am On Dec 11, 2020
RedPanthar:
The work end is where the first fixing should begin. Do this, and you will come back to testify :

1. Buy a ring and place it on your engagement finger. Make sure you only wear it where your boss would see it and watch your boss's reaction. You've been too germane and bland that you don't see your work callous during the weekend are specifically designed so you don't cultivate a relationship. I swear my hat on it you'll come back and say I said. So. Wear a ring and ensure your boss sees you flaunting it more than a few times.


2. Even when there's a heavy workload start asking for weekend breaks ahead before you'll be asked to work and again watch your bones reaction. The goal is to buy yourself space. As you play these games watch your boss's reactions




3. Pick your boss's calls less faster, less frequently. It's a masterstroke game to steal your availability from him and disorientation him from always assuming you're his go-go person he can summon whenever he pleases. All of thus is to stir things nd shake things up at the work end albeit subtly





4. Buy new clothes even if it's just two and try to put them on weekend or Fridays. Thus is to make them assume at work that whenever it's weekend they're disrupting your dates to force them psychologically to not call you upon demand. Make sure it's clothes they don't seem to see you frequently wear. Wear these and make sure you're gorgeous on weekend. The dressing that will make them ask why are you this elegant. Reply them on such occasions you were out on a date but since work demands were up you had to call it shut. Guilt trip their brains out and control the narrative at work



Now for the guy :

5. Love thrives in an atmosphere where there's a mutual resistant to beat. Now, paint the narrative to your guy that your boss seems to be against you both, and that's why he wants you occupied weekend and that you both would suffer. By making " the perception of your boss as the enemy ", you created a villain that makes the masculine willpower to fight in your guy rises up. Guess what else you'll get in advance, emotional support against when such arises again. Now, use this advantage to pull put his emotions and psyche to pull him out. When thus is done, you both have a common enemy or vision or objective and you can both use this to your advantage to bond and all. Be smart.




6. Force breaks at work


7. Pay him surprise visits


8. Be more frequent with video calls

9. Plan your meetings for Sundays. Relationships without physical contact will not stand the test of time


10. As a man he should do the visiting first especially at this beginning stage



Give him space and reach out to him. Relationships don't just end that fastly. No, it doesn't


He's hurting. Let him process his emotions. And when he reaches the place of thought that he wants to be with you inspite of what happened, he will establish contact.

You'll be fine





hmm are you a relationship guru can i get in touch with you
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by seyigiggle: 9:38am On Dec 11, 2020
then maintain its not you if things go awry.
a lot of such pic can be downloaded on the internet.

LucyB24:


My face wasn't visible.
Re: I Love Him So Much But I'm Afraid I've Lost Him. by Nobody: 9:38am On Dec 11, 2020
LucyB24:
I'm a 24 year old lady living and working in Abuja. My job is very time demanding. I'm usually very busy on weekdays, and sometimes on weekends I can get called to work if something important comes up.

There is a guy I've known for months now. We met in Abuja at an event and we've been friends since. He lives in lagos but visits Abuja occasionally. He's also a very busy guy and he hardly has time on his hands. We have spent sometime together talking and getting to know each other but we haven't been on an official date. Most of our interaction has been over phone calls and WhatsApp text messages due to the distance barrier.

I fell in love with him during the course of our friendship. He is everything I want in a man. He's financially stable, very good looking and smart. The few times I've spent talking to him have been a pleasure, both for my eyes and for my mind. I never thought I could ever meet someone who checks all those boxes perfectly.

Men like him usually get a lot of female attention and I've tried to tread carefully. I didnt want him to see me as cheap but I also don't want him to think I am not interested in him. The day he told me he loved me was very memorable for me because I felt the same way. Few days later I told him I loved him too. Due to the distance barrier we could only talk on phone. I'm a very decent lady with good upbringing but because of what I felt for him, I did things I thought I'd never do. One night we had a sex chat that ended in me sending nudes to him. I've never done this before. This made me feel vulnerable and cheap because even though he said he loved me, I never believed him because he didn't really act like someone who was in love with me. He wasn't the type to call everyday and there were periods where he would dissapear for days and ignore my calls and texts and then return like nothing happened.

Last week we planned a special meeting. I was to travel to Lagos to see him at his place on Saturday morning. He had planned to refund me the money I'd use for my airline ticket and even hire a taxi that would bring me straight to his place from the airport. The way he sounded I knew he took it as a big deal. I agreed to come see him in lagos. On Friday morning he called and I assured him I was going to come. He called me again in the afternoon and I assured him I was going to come.

Towards the end of work on Friday my boss informed me that I had to be at work on Saturday to complete a very important project. Immediately I got the information I sent him a text. I was too tired when I left for home and I planned on calling him later that evening. I was so tired that I took a quick nap and woke up to missed calls from him. I called him back and asked if he got my message and he said he didn't. I informed him of the change in plans and he got very furious. He accused me of being indecisive and playing games. He said he had cancelled lots of meetings and spent money preparing for my visit and was disappointed that I didn't take him as seriously as he took me. He ended the call in annoyance and I've not heard from him since. He isn't picking my calls or replying my texts. I've sent him voice messages on WhatsApp apologizing and explaining myself but he hasn't replied..

I really love this guy and I don't want to lose him. He probably thinks I'm lying to him or that I have someone else I'm seeing but that's not the case.


It is not about who you want, but who wants you. It is not about who you love, but who loves you.

Let him visit you first, before you visit him. That is all I will say. Invite him over and give him a make up treat.

Be a far and see, you might just be one of his options, hence he seldom calls.

Nobody takes an option serious and are quick to discard if sex with her is taking too much time to materialize.

Give yourself some sense and respect your sanity for now. Don't call or text for a week or two. Don't be a desperado.

Focus on your job. If you lose your job today, he will still leave cos you are just an option.

He was probably planing an all sex weekend and had promised to share juicy tales with his friends but it didn't work out as planned, hence the anger.

He didn't know about or you job today. He knew before hand anything could come up.

Well! If you like, take my advise serious. I have said my own.

Shalom.

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