You are welcome

dollynnn:

I had to take a screenshot of this.

MartinsD12:

Total nonsense, you have a boyfriend what were you expecting for him to be watching you like cinema, the truth is bitter but must be said if you have a boyfriend you know what it means, am sure he is spending on you, boyfriend is sexxxxx, nothing but sexxxxxxxx that's the meaning of boyfriend and girlfriend so deal with it.

You are very stupid!

Dayzzy:

You think this cannot happen after 4 years into a relationship?... and 4 years Into a relationship, you shouldn't visit the one you claim you love or dine with him?

Wait a minute here. Would it have killed her if she went to a public place to wine and dine? You fail to understand that people will be people and things like safety should not be taken likely.

Vaiki:
You are very stupid!

I knew some senseless people like you will quote me

Donspicey:



The day i will share stories of how many guys hv bn raped at tender age by dos so called aunty aunty....i will call ur attention to come and say same tin abt ladies.....

Emeritus...

Vaiki:
You are very stupid!

many guys translate spending on a woman to mean she il give u sex. dat is y guys ve to stop going out of their way to spend on a girl u know il not give u sex. rape is never an option cus say u don't spend for d babe.

FreeSpirited:
You were dating him..doing I love you I love you...u are not a virgin, you go to his house, he comes visiting u too..u dint tell us how many times both of you have kissed and romanced...And how many times he smooched and fingered you of which u disallowed him from having sex with u....you gave him mixed signals...you are dating him, enjoying benefits of dating, collecting his money, but u are forming smart for him...
..
I think that's why he used that format for you... otherwise, I doubt if he would have done that. You shouldn't have dated in the first place..you should only have maintain friends or bestie with defined friendship boundaries....
Imagine you saying u were planning to give him sex soon in your mind, that's suspicious of manipulation. The question is did you tell him this, that so so day o you guys will have sex as normal lovers do? You sexually frustrated him and he felt cheated, cos you are not even a virgin, he probably thinks you are fvvcking somewhere, so he resorted to that means, however traumatic for you....If you are not ready for sex..don't go and date bad boys who are not simps...who kiss you, press ur boobs..finger u...but u don't allow preeq..cos u are still counting time...you were playing him...then he played you...I dint say rape is the best way to handle ur situation...but
That's the way I see your story.......which u deliberately leave some details

God bless you richly for this.

Dayzzy:

Of course they would have worked but such precautions can only last for short while.
You yourself, do you follow the so called precautions?
Should your girlfriend/fiancee be so cautious that she won't even let you hug her?
Should she always have a friend with her when visiting you?
Should she call on her neighbour to stay with her whenever you pay her a visit?

If he truly raped her, the act is terrible. No blame game.

If she was not safe in her house, imagine what he could do to her in his house.

So you agreed they would have worked abi? Good. That is what I want to hear

Peace.

MartinsD12:

Total nonsense, you have a boyfriend what were you expecting for him to be watching you like cinema, the truth is bitter but must be said if you have a boyfriend you know what it means, am sure he is spending on you, boyfriend is sexxxxx, nothing but sexxxxxxxx that's the meaning of boyfriend and girlfriend so deal with it.

He should ask for it, not force her.
A lady can never force you to spend on her, she can only influence you to do so, but at the end, the decision is yours whether you want to spend on her or not.
Likewise, never force a lady to have sex with you. A little pestering can make her agree to sex as she has been considering it herself according to her post.

I'm sure your position on this will change if the op happens to be your close friend or sister.

Girl9999:


I never told him no sex until marriage. I told him about my experience in University and we both agreed to have sex when I was ready; when I was emotionally prepared. We are just two months into the relationship.

so sorry about what happened to you.you have to get yourself together and move on.first forgive yourself forgive him and dont fail to report the case as fast as you can.then move on.dont commit suicide it doesnt worth it.remember your parent love and live on. there is a good guy out there for a good soul like you.shalom God loves you get closer to him and have peace

Walk down the isle my foot.. the one I walk down the isle no be she wan kill me...women are completely demon. If you don't understand this today, wait you will tomorrow

[color=#000000][/color]

LMS1:
Op You Just Lack Life Expirience.
Don't You Atleast Watch Nollywood Movies?
There Are Lots Of Scenes Like This
To Learn From.
You Are Just A Newbie Into The Dating World.
But It Isnt All Your Fault As You Taught He Was Heaven Sent
Thats Why You Dine With Him.
Just Keep Your Cool And Dont Always Hang Out With Male Friends No Matter How He Flatter And Spoil U With Gift.
Not Untill He Walks U Down The Isle.
Something Similar May Happen To You Again Except You Avoid Men As Much As We Avoid You. Gudluck!

Shelumiel:
So you agreed they would have worked abi? Good. That is what I want to hear

Peace.

You chose to pick what suits you and ignore the rest.

This tells alot about you.

Shalom!

You deserved to be rape my dear. Some of you ladies are very wicked. You no be virgin and you are dating a guy that has blood running o his veins. You chop his money yet you don't want to give him sex. I know that if he come to visit you that you will be putting on something that will taunting him. You are just wicked. If you are not ready to have sex with a guy don't collect something from him. You can't be suffering someone pikin and expect him not to plan something for you.

Shelumiel:
Wait a minute here. Would it have killed her if she went to a public place to wine and dine? You fail to understand that people will be people and things like safety should not be taken likely.

Why do I have a feeling you have the capacity to do what the guy supposedly did?

Dayzzy:

He should ask for it, not force her.
A lady can never force you to spend on her, she can only influence you to do so, but at the end, the decision is yours whether you want to spend on her or not.
Likewise, never force a lady to have sex with you. A little pestering can make her agree to sex as she has been considering it herself according to her post.

I'm sure your position on this will change if the op happens to be your close friend or sister.

My position might not change is she in school to keep boyfriend or to study? Let's set our priorities right. She invited the guy to her apartment who does that if not a girl who wants sex, I mean why invite a boyfriend in your own apartment to sleep over to do what, that should be the question, for me I know somehow what the guy did is wrong but she put herself in that dilemma, it's the negative consequences of her actions. And she says she is considering having sex with that boyfriend I don't see any rape here.

Olisehinnocent:
You deserved to be rape my dear. Some of you ladies are very wicked. You no be virgin and you are dating a guy that has blood running o his veins. You chop his money yet you don't want to give him sex. I know that if he come to visit you that you will be putting on something that will taunting him. You are just wicked. If you are not ready to have sex with a guy don't collect something from him. You can't be suffering someone pikin and expect him not to plan something for you.

If she is not giving him sex, he should stop spending on her or buying her stuffs.
No justification if this truly happened.

Dayzzy:

You chose to pick what suits you and ignore the rest.

This tells alot about you.

Shalom!

This has nothing to do with what suits me. It has to do with what works...

[s]

Dayzzy:

Why do I have a feeling you have the capacity to do what the guy supposedly did?

[/s] That is a perverted way of thinking bros. Change please

Shelumiel:
This has nothing to do with what suits me. It has to do with what works...

Here comes the obvious question I have been throwing at you which you chose not to answer.
Careful in her own house? Besides, till when will she be careful? If you are having trust issues in basic scenario like this, then it's a failed relationship.

I hope your girl (if you have one) starts demanding to meet you in a public space simply because she is afraid of the devil you might be

Shelumiel:
[s][/s] That is a perverted way of thinking bros. Change please

Funny you can't see your opinion on this case as a perverted way of thinking.

Dayzzy:

Here comes the obvious question I have been throwing at you which you chose not to answer.
Careful in her own house? Besides, till when will she be careful? If you are having trust issues in basic scenario like this, then it's a failed relationship.

I hope your girl (if you have one) starts demanding to meet you in a public space simply because she is afraid of the devil you might be

So throwing precaution to the wind and believing that all will be well is the right way to go abi? Please are you even listening to yourself...


And by the way, my girlfriend and I always meet in public places. We choose to do this to avoid many ungodly acts

Dayzzy:

Funny you can't see your opinion on this case as a perverted way of thinking.

I speak what is right. You on the other hand speak what will continue to lure women into being rape victims

Girl9999:
Life doesn't seem worth living anymore.

He hasn't even called me to know how I am doing.

I can't believe people are insulting me and blaming me for what happened. I created this thread to get advice and comfort but I'm getting insults. I'm a very emotional person and this isn't helping.

I'm crying all over again just reading some comments. I don't have an alcohol problem and yes I planned on having sex with him soon; when I felt ready, but definitely before marriage. How can you say this is my fault?

Today might be my last day on this earth. Human beings are indeed wicked.

Do not generalize your condemnation of men or human beings. There are few good ones actually. You just haven't met them.
Regarding your situation, you should look at it as a unique thing and treat it your own way. At best, people can only offer you suggestions.
What happened to you is now part of your life. You can live with it. In fact, if you choose, you can forget it. Life is so much. Stop over bloating the thing. I know it is a serious thing but much bigger things happened to others but they moved on. You too can move on.
Remember this thing happened already. It is now past. Don't allow your past to spoil your present and your future. Trust yourself. Gradually you can wither the storm.
Good luck!

Most times, I find Nairaland uninteresting, I'd rather turn to reddit for help on very critical issues.

A few questions here for all of us:
Do we have phsychoterapists in here?
Is the so much desired justice not most enjoyed by the living?
Can we at least drift a little and focus on this quote below?

Girl9999:

Today might be my last day on this earth. Human beings are indeed wicked.

@Girl9999
Listen sweet heart. You're just gonna give up?
Okay, you're hurt and it's painful, but you're gonna just take a decision that'll hurt others for the rest of their lives? Real people who really care and genuinely love you, I'm talking about your mom, your dad what about your siblings? Have they done anything wrong to deserve such pain you could inflict on them?

Lastly, I might not know who you are but I have sisters too. Your post caught my attention, so I'll not forgive you if you commit suicide. Think about it, I could be one of the people you're gonna hurt with that suicidal path.

I'm more concerned about that. I BEG YOU IN THE NAME OF YOUR MUM, DON'T DO IT.

LeanonGOD:
Being sarcastic is your only way of therapy. Imagine, if your dad had used a condom. WAYRAY, TUFIAKWA.

Be Simping there. Ode sombori. They both drank the same wine, but only she got knocked out. Nonsense and ingredients. Seems the noise about false rape accusations has ebbed and this one wants to come up with her own. Wonder if she is still in the man's house wanting a second rape.

Girl9999,
First of all, sorry for your predicament.Don't kill yourself.What we should do is to first talk to your parents. Tell them everything and they will take you for a police report and open a file on the case.

The police will take it up from there.
Sorry

MartinsD12:

My position might not change is she in school to keep boyfriend or to study? Let's set our priorities right. She invited the guy to her apartment who does that if not a girl who wants sex, I mean why invite a boyfriend in your own apartment to sleep over to do what, that should be the question, for me I know somehow what the guy did is wrong but she put herself in that dilemma, it's the negative consequences of her actions. And she says she is considering having sex with that boyfriend I don't see any rape here.

Truth is, one won't think along the line of 'study or boyfriend' anymore if such happens.
Some parents even expect you to be in a relationship in your final year of study so really, that's not it.

Also, it's not clear if he was meant to sleep over..the norms could have been for him to take his leave in the night. For him to take along a wine, he probably had ulterior motives
Truth is, rape is non-consented sex, even if she had it in mind to give in eventually, she isn't ready yet.
There are other ways to satisfy his sexual needs, simple communication between the two could have solved this.

Shinto1:
Walk down the isle my foot.. the one I walk down the isle no be she wan kill me...women are completely demon. If you don't understand this today, wait you will tomorrow

[color=#000000][/color]

wahala dey o,you and Duncan mighty na brothers?.
anyway how she take wan kill you? abeg save a bachelor.

Girl9999:
I created this account to hide my identity. I'm in a very emotional condition at the moment. I've been crying since morning. I've not left my house, not even for church. I've lost the will to live, all because of what happened yesterday evening.

I've been dating this guy for two months. I thought he was a great guy. He was always nice to me, smart and hard-working. I lost my virginity at the age of 18 in University and it was to someone that just wanted to have sex with me. He lied about loving me. All he wanted was sex and when he had his way he abandoned me and dated another girl in my department. Since then I've had a fear of relationships, most importantly of sex. I vowed to only have sex with someone I was going to marry; someone I was certain loved me.

When I met my boyfriend, I thought he was the one. We vibed well and we were both in the same field of work. Everything seemed to click. I opened up to him about my experience and my decision to have sex only when I was ready. He agreed and said he was going to respect my wishes.

Yesterday he visited me at my apartment. This wasn't the first time he was visiting me. We paid each other visits all the time. This time he brought a bottle of wine with him. I prepared food, we both eat and he served us some wine. The last thing I remember is taking few sips and then everything else is blurry.

Next thing I am waking up by 8am this morning with a severe headache, cramped legs and a sore feeling around my vagina. There was something that looked like dried semen on my left thigh and some around my breast. I could also perceive the scent of his perfume on my body. He raped me. The man that claimed to love me raped me. I haven't spoken to anyone since morning, all I've been doing is crying. My phone has been on silent all day.

I want to report him to the police but first I want to look at his face and ask why he would do this to me. I already planned on having sex with him soon. Why couldn't he wait? I want to involve my parents and his parents as well but I don't want this news to spread and take a hit on my reputation. I'm confused about what to do.

Why are men like this? I feel defiled and violated. My mind has been constantly flooded with suicidal thoughts all day. If I make it through this, I'm done with relationships forever.

Its unfortunate that you meet bad and irresponsible guys.
Never hide your feelings, open up to relatives and friends. You need serious help and counseling at this point.
Never contemplate suicide please.
Please, have you gone to the hospital for treatment; to avoid unwanted pregnancy and other sad possibilities. Don't hesitate, report to police too asap

Vaiki:
you are very stupid!!

see human being o!

Roddd:
Most times, I find Nairaland uninteresting, I'd rather turn to reddit for help on very critical issues.

A few questions here for all of us:
Do we have phsychoterapists in here?
Is the so much desired justice not most enjoyed by the living?
Can we at least drift a little and focus on this quote below?



@Girl9999
Listen sweet heart. You're just gonna give up?
Okay, you're hurt and it's painful, but you're gonna just take a decision that'll hurt others for the rest of their lives? Real people who really care and genuinely love you, I'm talking about your mom, your dad what about your siblings? Have they done anything wrong to deserve such pain you could inflict on them?

Lastly, I might not know who you are but I have sisters too. Your post caught my attention, so I'll not forgive you if you commit suicide. Think about it, I could be one of the people you're gonna hurt with that suicidal path.

I'm more concerned about that. I BEG YOU IN THE NAME OF YOUR MUM, DON'T DO IT.

I tell you.. Reddit or Quora.
You see this nairaland ehn, people will even make things worse

Dpsychologist:

Why are men like this?

Thats the guy's problem not men.

BTW

Sorry for your plight, that is a terrible experience.

Fact that she added that line shows she just one of those toxic feminists looking for a man to ruin. See as she is talking about sex as if it was goldmine. i have learnt how to read those creatures.