yetunsbay:
lol, we're Africans. Age or not once a man is free monetarily nothing should stop him anymore

for me i am more bothered about a young man trying to start a family, producing offsprings he cant adequately cater for THAN a man/woman deciding not to get married..

yetunsbay:
lol, who says so ? Then go marry at 45

I know plenty 50years Igbo men not marry.

Early marriage is good, but until I make the money to feed an extra mouth, no way.

YOUR days is different to MINE.

safarigirl:


You are mentioning the exceptions.

Coscharis CEO is one man, what about the thousands of others that have failed in the same venture? The people that married poor and never became anything because marriage ensured life passed them by?

For every one Coscharis, there are a thousand Amadis that marriage did not become the golden ticket they thought it would be.

Anyway, anybody can marry at any time they like, where I have issues is people who give birth in poverty. You can marry, but don't bring kids into the poverty.

And getting married or late does not give you any good woman or man. Some people marry supposed good people that frustration turns to demons. Some men have married wives that go on to cheat on them with rich men, and dump the kids on the unsuspecting man. Some women marry young, only for the man to become a wife beater because economy don useless am finish.

If you settle down in a poor community, you will see all the people that married young and despair is all they give you. Dem no dey enjoy life, as some of you will have us think on the internet

You are absolutely right, like you said wife cheating on husband with rich men, same way we have wives cheating on their rich husbands with one undergraduate student who sags is trousers, or even ogas driver. That is why i said a good partner is the prayer.

Also, this issue of marrying in poverty is the most silly idea i have seen. If at all, just one is fine. Sometimes its hard to blame people who have kids when they are financially down. If they start progressing financially at 48, and start child-bearing, they probably will be 70 when their first child clocks 20. That is also not easy.

Every man to his or her own struggles.

Simply, don't

Frustration will make you maltreat your spouse if you can't care for them. And women hardly respect men that don't step to the plate

And don't confuse the statistics of a developed society that pays you to have kids to one where from A to Z is out of pocket like Nigeria

gbami:

Let me guess.. you are not married.
When you get married and he can't provide make sure you remember me.
Guys listen. From a married man. Marriage no be fantasy island o. It is reality. Nobody expects you wife to contribute a penny in marriage unlike relationship. You go get High BP if you can't provide basic stuff for your family. Reality is different from "20 ways to make marriage work" written by one single woman.
If you can't provide basic for yourself and another person...no marry. Guys, Stand up, Draw your ears..Repeat after me.. "If I no fit provide basics for myself and another person, marriage motivators leave me". You can now sit down guys.

Op, this guy is saying the truth.


The most important thing in marriage is stable income, it makes things easier.



If you are a single guy and you don't have a stable income or means of income, please delay getting married and try fix your finance first, it's very important in marriage.


If you have a stable income as a man, you have solved 90% of your marital issues, the rest you can overlook or compromise and have a happy home.


But once the money is lacking, there lies the problem no matter how good your wife is.



As a single man, don't marry if you don't have stable income to provide comfortably for at least 3 adults.

I doubt that research,is not in all cases this young ones gives headache more

I want to get married now!

RenaissanceGuy:
You didn't tell us how much you're earning. N15,000?

GloryGlory01:


You called this "crap". Please my friend, how much money do you think can satisfy a woman. You are a learner.

You're rude...

With girls of nowadays, few of them can stay with you when you have no job. Man must check his income before marriage, cos is big task.

That is typical in some Nigerian context, not all Nigerians. When both couples are respectfully and lovingly sharing with each other their resources, without undue high blood pressure because of society expectations, marriage becomes a striving beautiful journey. In that same country, Nigeria, a couple of women earn far more than their husbands, and they still have happy homes, working with each other lovingly: a simple example is the new DG WTO, Ngozi Iweala. It is good for man to earn money, that's important, but do not be too stereotyped and avoid ladies who also have that stereotypical mindsets that the 'man's money is everyone's, but the woman's money is hers'. God bless and enrich single guys so they can easily settle with the women of their desires: God bless and enrich single ladies so they can easily work and strive with the man of their dreams to a bright future. Amen

gbami:

Let me guess.. you are not married.
When you get married and he can't provide make sure you remember me.
Guys listen. From a married man. Marriage no be fantasy island o. It is reality. Nobody expects you wife to contribute a penny in marriage unlike relationship. You go get High BP if you can't provide basic stuff for your family. Reality is different from "20 ways to make marriage work" written by one single woman.
If you can't provide basic for yourself and another person...no marry. Guys, Stand up, Draw your ears..Repeat after me.. "If I no fit provide basics for myself and another person, marriage motivators leave me". You can now sit down guys.

NONSENSE TALK for this present Nigeria, only things working in this country is( PAYING BILLS up/down).

I like the idea of marrying early though

tunapawizzy:

for me i am more bothered about a young man trying to start a family, producing offsprings he cant adequately cater for THAN a man/woman deciding not to get married..

more reason why money dey important

mofedamijo:


You're right, however, everyone to its own. Cosharis C.E.O couldn't afford a shoe or suit when he got married, today, see where he is, the late oyo governor was washing corpse in the U.S when he started life, most Nigerian millions today had nothing when they got married.

I have seen situations where the woman was the one who help set the husband to become a millionaire. The truth is one should pray to have a good partner.

I have seen guys who had 5million naira saved aside the wedding expenses, after wedding, retrenchment happened and they never floated again, na madam sustain the family till bro floated again.

My advice is, never leave a good woman who will stand by you and help you build because you don't have a fat account yet, by the time fat account comes, you will mostly see account deleterious women coming in the form of helper.

Those days of choscharis motors and formal governor of oyo still better .. economy was good then and lot of opportunities abounded.. how much is dollar to naira back then ? Answer me oo..



I’m a young man not even close to 30 and I spend over 100k every month for my own upkeep aside house rent ooo..

And no be say I Dey chop something special o.


Data, fuel, food don comsume my networth.. not to talk of other miscellaneous..

Minimum wage is. 30k which is a little above 50$ using btc rate.

If you’re earning 1naira everyday , u can never make 1$ in a year .. think bro . Think ! Things are bad .. marriage is a scam to men..






See marriage no be my force .. as a man MONEY SHOULD BE YOUR NUMBER ONE PRIORITY BEFORE U CONSIDER MARRIAGE..


No matter how u want to justify, a man is judged by his pocket.. the moment u can’t maintain the provisions , societal will frown at you..


Even if your wife is working , u can’t rely on women source of income oo.. no one is asking u to become dangote before marrying but atleast be able to feed two mouths comfortably.. dem no Dey chop pikin ooo.. pussy Dey tire person oo.


To guys reading this, pls don’t fall for the scam..

You will see the ugliest side of woman the day u fail to come through financially. She might pretend at first stage but body go tell u.. even aside that self , shey na garri u one Dey drink for marriage? WhT if God go give u triplet at a time ,,


Think oo

gbami:

Let me guess.. you are not married.
When you get married and he can't provide make sure you remember me.
Guys listen. From a married man. Marriage no be fantasy island o. It is reality. Nobody expects you wife to contribute a penny in marriage unlike relationship. You go get High BP if you can't provide basic stuff for your family. Reality is different from "20 ways to make marriage work" written by one single woman.
If you can't provide basic for yourself and another person...no marry. Guys, Stand up, Draw your ears..Repeat after me.. "If I no fit provide basics for myself and another person, marriage motivators leave me". You can now sit down guys.

safarigirl:
Lol

What is this foolish nonsense?

You are one of the pandemics in this country, promoting this nonsense theory.

How do you marry when you are not financially stable? How do you marry when you are not mentally prepared to marry?

There is no benefit to marrying when you're poor, especially if you plan to have kids after marriage.

Don't be a selfish person, dragging innocent people into your instability.

Nigeria is difficult enough, don't worsen it.

Do not marry young when you are poor. You are only allowed to marry young when your name is Shagari, Dantata, Abacha, Elumelu, Indimi, or Babangida.

If your papa no hold steady bar wey go fit hold down you and your wife, please, respect yourself and face your hustle, be you male or female.

God bless you sweetheart.



Tell them.


As a married man, I know how much I spend monthly on family compared to when I was single. And this keeps me wondering how most Nigerian couple who are struggling financially cope, sometimes thinking about it makes me unnecessarily moody.




People should ignore the OP, I am sure he is not married.


Raising a family today is no longer a joke. Everything has been heavily monetized, so without adequate income, it's going to be hell for any couple.


I pray God help the single and struggling, it's not easy. God will strengthen all single guys working hard to escape poverty, it's a terrible battle, innocent kids shouldn't be dragged into it please

Op is trying to give hope to the broke guys on this forum
How can a poor guy who barely feed think of marriage?
I know people who earn 20k monthly, how do u want them to survive in marriage?
Believe the op at your risk

Wo Life no balance abeg

tunapawizzy:

for me i am more bothered about a young man trying to start a family, producing offsprings he cant adequately cater for THAN a man/woman deciding not to get married..

God bless u!!

It's only in Nigeria we care about this stuffs... Get married whenever you are capable of taking care of at least 4 persons... Not just 2 cos your first born might be twins Dem no dey tell person... Don't bring innocent kids to the world to suffer cos you want to turn daddy early

Apt. I love these.[quote author=safarigirl post=100120938]

You are mentioning the exceptions.

Coscharis CEO is one man, what about the thousands of others that have failed in the same venture? The people that married poor and never became anything because marriage ensured life passed them by?

For every one Coscharis, there are a thousand Amadis that marriage did not become the golden ticket they thought it would be.

Hmmm... Getting married early is good...To those of u saying financial stability b4 marriage...Hmm.. Marriage is not like that oo...I've seen so many cases where the man was financial stable b4 marriage...A little turn around unleashed mayhem in the marriage...Last yr was a critical example...Do u know how many homes were broken because of the pandemic?...They never saw it coming...One should just pray for his own partner... Koko niyen...
Isegwari...

OP: There is no benefit whatsoever. What will be will be? What if you die nko?

I believe in Time and Chance. Do what's right by YOU at the right time. Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

The same way people are jumping into marriages is the exact same way people are jumping right out of it.
Now, wetin cause am?
The universe is designed in a way you and I will never understand. Las Las, we all die and go. Other f*ckry continues.

mofedamijo:


You are absolutely right, like you said wife cheating on husband with rich men, same way we have wives cheating on their rich husbands with one undergraduate student who sags is trousers, or even ogas driver. That is why i said a good partner is the prayer.

Also, this issue of marrying in poverty is the most silly idea i have seen. If at all, just one is fine. Sometimes its hard to blame people who have kids when they are financially down. If they start progressing financially at 48, and start child-bearing, they probably will be 70 when their first child clocks 20. That is also not easy.

Every man to his or her own struggles.

And what is wrong with having kids at 70, if that is when you are ready?

The best thing for kids is quality time with their parents, a lot of poor people don't get that with their children because they are working their asses off for chicken change, and come home too tired to bond with their kids. The same kids most of them will still send out to hawk items to help the family.

The same kids that are exposed to all sorts of paedophiles and predators because they have to live in shanties, and hawk in dangerous areas, kids that may never have a decent childhood because of poverty. You think if you marry at 22, and eventually make money at 48, it will make up for that missed childhood?

Only selfish people give birth when they cannot afford kids, because these selfish people have a selfish agenda that involves the kids growing up fast, so, they can foist their financial responsibilities on the unfortunate child. The same set of people that pawn their daughters off to the highest bidder when she's old enough to be married, or maybe even younger, so, she can bring money to the family through her husband.

There are more cons than pros to marrying poor and young, and the sad thing is that the lives ruined go far beyond the young couple's. It is one of the most selfish things a human being can do, birthing a child to poverty, and I swear to God, such people cannot make heaven. It is a special brand of wickedness to do something like that to a child.

gbami:

Let me guess.. you are not married.
When you get married and he can't provide make sure you remember me.
Guys listen. From a married man. Marriage no be fantasy island o. It is reality. Nobody expects you wife to contribute a penny in marriage unlike relationship. You go get High BP if you can't provide basic stuff for your family. Reality is different from "20 ways to make marriage work" written by one single woman.
If you can't provide basic for yourself and another person...no marry. Guys, Stand up, Draw your ears..Repeat after me.. "If I no fit provide basics for myself and another person, marriage motivators leave me". You can now sit down guys.

Make sure you add "In Nigeria", when you write things like this.

mofedamijo:


You are absolutely right, like you said wife cheating on husband with rich men, same way we have wives cheating on their rich husbands with one undergraduate student who sags is trousers, or even ogas driver. That is why i said a good partner is the prayer.

Also, this issue of marrying in poverty is the most silly idea i have seen. If at all, just one is fine. Sometimes its hard to blame people who have kids when they are financially down. If they start progressing financially at 48, and start child-bearing, they probably will be 70 when their first child clocks 20. That is also not easy.

Every man to his or her own struggles.

In all these discussions, you people didn’t take into consideration the fact that even those that marry early might have fertility issues and still end up giving birth to kids later in life, or no kids at all

[quote author=gbami post=99990872]
Let me guess.. you are not married.
When you get married and he can't provide make sure you remember me.
Guys listen. From a married man. Marriage no be fantasy island o. It is reality. Nobody expects you wife to contribute a penny in marriage unlike relationship. You go get High BP if you can't provide basic stuff for your family. Reality is different from "20 ways to make marriage work" written by one single woman.
If you can't provide basic for yourself and another person...no marry. Guys, Stand up, Draw your ears..Repeat after me.. "If I no fit provide basics for myself and another person, marriage motivators leave me". You can now sit down guys.[/quote
Louder pls

There are no fast rules to these things..
U can marry early and become a young widow/widower while spmone that married late still with their partners.

I have seen cases where virgins got married and stiĺl seeking fruit of womb 4to 5 yrs after marriage while the non virgins that married late gave birth to twins immediately after wedding..etc

IMO, I feel a successful marriage is Gods own undilluted blessings to the individusls involved.

But all things being equal, its importanter to be financially stable befor thinking of marriage(applicable to both gender)