igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spent a million plus. I work with ministry of health.

My wife has been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune.

Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop (Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she asks me money to buy tailor materials which I give.

Now within a space of 7 months my wife now has 14 apprentices. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my wife to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and I don't really care about her money.

But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she does not have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money.

This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbors, that am a useless husband, I feel insulted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.

I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop (Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying.

benzion72:
Bros I feel your pain. I beg be with her money. Some women are Union horse that never opened it's fist. Somebody said if a man has 20k and a woman has 80k how much did the family has na 20k oooooooo

abimic:
Frankly the signs were evident while you dated, but you chose to turn blind eyes to them. Relationship was meant to be a precursor that determines whether a man and woman would marry, but love blinded some and they now endure their marriages. A union or relationship should have the basic understanding, respect for each other, but it seems your wife never had such for you to have sent money to another man while you even needed such. Some women even go as low as male friends returning their own personal chats with their husband, partner, bf. One just need be careful to enter marriage, when the signs are evident, just never ignore the warning signals. Cindy222, come in here ..

Thegeneralqueen:
Criminal.

Depressed101:
criminal you two" selfish beings

Cindy222:



abimic lolzzzz I am here oooo......

You're right,the signs are always there but love makes people ignore it,sometimes they even feel in marriage they can change the person or the marriage itself will change the person. It does not work that way,I feel whatever people do in relationships,good or bad will be magnified in marriage.

I also feel before marrying anybody financial issues should be discussed o,its very important,that thing destroys marriages nowadays.

But this lady na wa,she does not help or support him at all,not nice. Some men,I repeat SOME MEN o, are really trying,they take care of everything financial at home,the least you can do is support him and give him peace before he dies early o....Stress kills men nowadays really fast....Hmmm it is well o....

Thegeneralqueen:
[s]They you want to be unfortunate in this life you this boy ?[/s]

slimman007:


Sister,I have watch you closely ever since I joined nairaland and I am so amaze with the way you respond to issues whenever they are raised here.I must confess that your husband if you are married is a lucky man to have such an amazing wife like you.Even though I don't know you mere reading your response must times shows you are a woman with good heart a replica of that woman described in proverb 31.I don't mind to be your friend if you are single.I just love you keep doing good and God bless you abundantly.

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spent a million plus. I work with ministry of health.

My wife has been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune.

Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop (Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she asks me money to buy tailor materials which I give.

Now within a space of 7 months my wife now has 14 apprentices. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my wife to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and I don't really care about her money.

But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she does not have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money.

This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbors, that am a useless husband, I feel insulted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.

I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

Thegeneralqueen:
This right here is for you.

Thegeneralqueen:
This right here is for you.

ozonechrome:



In marriage some issues like this are easy fix. Not everything should end in divorce.

Romanoff:


To avoid issues, it should be discussed o. Cause someone might be strongly against the bill sharing. I know someone suffering it now. He could be dying and his wife will boldly tell people "her money is not for public use".

It should be discussed to avoid stories o.

dammyllare:
Just two things.
Women are a dangerous being and they don't forgive easily.
The fact you didn't contribute in her getting that shop would have made her vow never to use a dime of her money for your use.
Secondly, women are generally selfish and only a few of them would rather give money to their husbands but would borrow the world for their families.

It is unfortunate you didn't see the red flag and I wouldn't advice you to divorce your wife.

Any woman who could look at the hustle of her husband and never thought of helping him with the smallest of 1k is not worthy of a husband.
Remember, old age would come one day and such woman would become monsters because at that time, love is 80% gone and her priorities would lie with the children!
Know this and know peace

wirinet:

Then the wife should also remove eye from my money.

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spent a million plus. I work with ministry of health.

My wife has been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune.

Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop (Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she asks me money to buy tailor materials which I give.

Now within a space of 7 months my wife now has 14 apprentices. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my wife to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and I don't really care about her money.

But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she does not have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money.

This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbors, that am a useless husband, I feel insulted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.

I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

igwebest23:
My pastor warned me during counseling to be careful when ever I have issue with my wife, that if I go to her mum(I.e my Wife mum to warn her daughter, most parents will always side their daughter, d may not see any thing wrong with what their daughter is doing. Then if I go back to my parents, d will support me and conclude I married a Jezebel and for me to send her home. I need to go and report her to my pastors if she doesn't change, then I will have no option than to do d needful

igwebest23:
This is too much for me. I have had enough. I got married to my wife last year October 2020. I did both traditional wedding and white wedding, spent a million plus. I work with ministry of health.

My wife has been insisting that I disclose my salary to her from day 1 but I never, I just told her that am earning 100+. Before I met my wife, she already learn Fashion designing. Then while was rushing around, preparing for wedding, she was pestering me to open shop for her. I specifically told her that d money I have now is Solly for wedding and traditional rite, which cost me fortune.

Then after much pressure, her people contributed money and paid for d shop (Remember I have paid her bride price then). I have swallowed red pill. How can I open shop for a girl I have not finished marrying. Then when she opened d shop, I equally supporting her with other things like buying protector and chairs. Every day she is going to shop, I drop pocket of 1k. Some times she asks me money to buy tailor materials which I give.

Now within a space of 7 months my wife now has 14 apprentices. She collected like 30k from them. Then all the money she made in her shop, she put all in her account, she doesn't contribute anything at home. Infact decided not to apply for ATM card. Some time, I may go to. ATM to get money and d tell me no network, if I come to my wife to ask her for ordinary 1k, she will say she doesn't have it. I never asked her to help in our home finances before, and I don't really care about her money.

But now found out through her Facebook chat that she sent her male school friends 7k. She hid it from me, she said d guy needed d money to treat her father in d hospital. I was shock. Cos my wife always complained she does not have money. Now she is complaining that I don't support her in her shop. That she can do whatever she wants with her money.

This morning, she was raising her voice to the hearing our flat neighbors, that am a useless husband, I feel insulted. Am embarrased. That I don't support her. She said her shop rent has expired that I should give her d money but she have enough money in her account to pay it. While is asking me. Am d one that pays for house rent, I buy food stuff, I give her transport every day.

I have had enough. I will call her mum to come over and carry her daughter. I can never beat her. The last night I shouted at her she fainted not to talk of beating.

gentlestdude:

OP please don't listen to this dumb fool

okine4real:


I believe you are wrong here. When you marry your woman, I mean your own ordained wife, she know need to dey pester you to reveal how much you earn. Na you go see say this woman fit manage the secret when you won reveal. Eg you told her you earn 100K but you earn 200k, but the woman know even if manage 50k say make una use am plan for a month, in this case, while would I reveal say I dey earn 200k? But if I tell her say I dey earn 100k instead of 200k and I tell am say make we dey manage 59k per month and she call me say whether I dey mad nii, say 50k too much and make we dey rough 40k, and we have been leaving on 40k for long and she know blink, then I can even be giving her my salary to manage. Men are not fools, men always want the female gender to lead then dey would follow.

Let me use myself as example all my investment, dey pay to my wife acc. I tell am say make she use the money pay all my children school fee, buy cloths for them and herself, I tell her say, intact I have solve all your problems just leave me alone this woman, am talking of money running into Millions, I swear na only school fee money this woman dey pay inside, all the rest she say na me go still go dey do am, say that money we go still use am for investment, inside me I go dey vex say she this woman won kill me nii, so na work I come for inside this marriage ohh, but atvtge same time am happy say, my wife nor be like some babes when them see money, na Gold, lace, car go they there mind. Mind you my wife know be local girl ohh, she be full chick I swear, even me I be confirm learner for Igboro for were she dey, but we dey run things well.

Guys open your eyes when you won marry.

Someone7:


Lol who send you go marry??

wirinet:


So marriage na to the put eye for man money?

In the western world if woman na him get money, then when they divorce, her money (which is regarded as family money including assets) are shared between both of them.

Thegoodone13:
let her go before children come in. I'm passing through the same things but we have three children already. She has more than five of what your wife have in account but I borrowed ordinary 20k last week to settle bill

Romanoff:
This Red pill you people are swallowing, I hope you know the side effects?

People spend so much time during courtship or dating doing irrelevant things like having sex and galavanting all over the place, leaving aside important things that should be discussed like Finances, number of children, splitting of bills and chores, child care, faith, goals and ambitions, etc.


.

Kandeed:


All these can be said under 20min