Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? - Romance (4) - Nairaland
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| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by eddy1977(m): 8:32pm On May 02, 2011 |
There cant be any strong relationship without forgiveness. the moment we learn to forgive,we establish ourselves stronger for a genuine relationship. you can live in a fantasy land and dream to marry a holy man who will be perfect and spotless.good luck. but some of us who live in the real world,tend to understand that humans are faillible and mortals. a man may be faithful to his wife,but thats not the only pillar for a strong relationship.how about vision for the futur,academic goals and achievements,humility,financial stability and other characters? even the holy pastors have been caught either sleeping with hhokers or other men.presidents and bishops have been caught sniffing bikinis. its wrong to sleep around and cheat.but its not criminal. will you dump your man just because he felt another woman's bbreast ? comon,get real my folks. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by InHim4Him(m): 8:33pm On May 02, 2011 |
So much counsel has been given. A word is enough for the wise. Use your tongue to count your teeth else you might have to use your teeth to count your tongue. Make a wise choice. As for your fiance, he will do it again and again. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by sexylogan(m): 8:35pm On May 02, 2011 |
eddy1977: wud u dump ur fiance if she licked another man's balls? |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by texazzpete(m): 8:43pm On May 02, 2011 |
Husband dey scarce for market these days o! I don't know why the OP is complaining. The trust had long since evaporated in your relationship if you had to skulk around and stalk his apartment by 5am. He may as well be asking himself if he can trust you sef. The fact that he still wants to marry you is a good sign! |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Princek12(m): 8:48pm On May 02, 2011 |
190: I am omnipresent, my brother. Long live the prince. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 8:59pm On May 02, 2011 |
@ poster, Being in a relationship for 4 years is very challenging. I will strongly advice you to sit him down and talk sense into him. He will definitely understand, realize his mistake and correct himself. WISHING ALL THE BEST IN THE RELATIONSHIP, because every thing is in your hands. SAVE UP! |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by donobi(m): 9:04pm On May 02, 2011 |
Girl quitting is not the best. Let me ask u(1) do u deny him asses to u? (2) are u living him on the the grounds that he cheated on u & letting off every quality in him? (3) wht now happen if u get man that dont cheat & u ended up marying the man fews years later he start cheating on u ill u divorce him? there are 3 things u find in a man 1 chasing women, 2 smoking or 3 drinking. If a dont do any of this run. Work on yourself your man likes ikebe & warfront infact most men. Save ur relationship. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 9:34pm On May 02, 2011 |
It's up to you to make a decision if you truely love him give him a second chance |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by stanock: 9:38pm On May 02, 2011 |
please i beg you do not walkout,almost every man has the tendency of doing what he did.try and find a way to go back to him, you never can tell he will be better than the next one you will meet.since for past 4yers you caught him just but once that means he loves you!!! |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by realcele: 9:38pm On May 02, 2011 |
If I were in shoes I would not go to his house in the morning or even confirm what my instinct is telling me, I will just believe my instinct and say it our at the appropriate time. What I might do instead is to watch the kind of attitudes he develops while he is dating another woman at least you her lucky he no date another man. If I can cope with this then my next action plan is to ensure he is sensible enough not to be infected if those two are soughted then life is back to normal. If you want to be honest with yourself, an average man with blood and water in his vein will cheat and to be honest he is entiltle to go for what he wants. Cheating does not mean he does not like/love or adore you, a man cheat for so many reasons which at times is unexplainable or you might not be able to reason even if he explains. My advice to you is get an explanation from him and based on that decide whether you want to leave or not. For you to get a man or woman that does not cheat these days is like asking for a needle to pass through camel's eyes. It is your life you know what you can cope with but dont expect anyone not to cheat remember promises and later changes his mind or fail. Na only God never fails. If you want to enjoy any relationship especially marriage you got to learn to forgive and , not sure what to include as am tempted to write ignore but you don't want to ignore relationship that might lead to ailment later on. So I will leave you to fill the gap. I wish you all the best and wisdom to make your decision. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by HolyMikel(m): 9:50pm On May 02, 2011 |
Go back to him but it will still happen again. Even if you start dating another guy, you cant avoid this, we men are like that, you cant stop nature |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 9:57pm On May 02, 2011 |
HolyMikel:how come ur name is holy mikel, and u cant be holy lol? abeg comot for here |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by rockchic: 10:01pm On May 02, 2011 |
donobi: Answer: 1. no i do not deny him access 2. i was planning to leave because i dont want to marry someone that would be habitually cheating on me. Honestly begging for forgiveness is not an option, i didnt do anything wrong. So far, he has been begging everyday and calling my relatives to plead with me. When he pleads and begs like that i feel the urge to forgive him because he is so remorseful, but on the other hand i do not want to get married to someone that would be cheating on me regularly. He swears that this is the first time it is happening, and that he fell for the frontside and backside and wanted to have a taste of it, but saw that nothing much was there(according to him oh). anyway, God dey. Still praying and confused though |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 10:03pm On May 02, 2011 |
I'm sorry for the lepa girls, I really am. This is why the woman I marry [b]MUST [/b]have nyansh. I know myself and I know it's just not the same if she's lacking in that area. Now I definitely won't mess around, but I would pretty much always stare deeply at a big booty whenever it passes me  , which would be just as bad for her self-esteem. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by MrsChima(f): 10:08pm On May 02, 2011 |
Lepa girls have nyansh too you know.  |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 10:10pm On May 02, 2011 |
perhaps, but not the type that satisfies this reformed freak.  You don't understand what I mean by lepa. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by MrsChima(f): 10:11pm On May 02, 2011 |
I see the Lepas in Canada must be doing some strange shit then. Because lepas in America have some Nicky Minaj type asses. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by eddy1977(m): 10:13pm On May 02, 2011 |
your man is out of his mind. why continue begging you and calling your folks? you guys have a shitty relationship (excuse my french). what does he see in you for him to beg for amnesty like a genocider? if its just because of your genevieve looks,then he should dump you and move on. what if you become handicapped,would he still pursue you? the true value of a woman is not just the genevive looks or the mercy johnson shape, not even the monalisa chinda's lips. no.how about her mental strength?academics,handling of secrets,problem solving skills,brilliance,handling money etc, i can get p u ssy anywhere.but a real woman for a real relationship is more that ttities,@ss,p u ss y,and sh it. any real woman in this house? give me an amen. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by ibelab(m): 10:13pm On May 02, 2011 |
if u quit ,how are u sure ? u gona get a better man , who ain,t gonna cheat on u,and secondly it,z depends too on ur age,  in 9ja? + another 4yrs of courtship,  |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 10:16pm On May 02, 2011 |
man quit trying to buy browny points @Chima, then you don't understand what I mean by lepa. Case in point.  |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by contracult: 10:18pm On May 02, 2011 |
I cannot believe all the replies to this poor girl: My dear, dude is only sorry he got caught. This crap about husband being scarce, is just that crap! You decide the standard you want in life and live by them. If you do not want to be cheated on, then don't marry a cheat period. A better person who shares your values will find you. Do not, I repeat DO NOT fall for emotional blackmail oooo. Any man that cheats when he should be chasing you and trying to impress you the most will cheat when he has nothing to lose. Drop his skanky cheating behind. Not good enough for you! If you can live with a cheat, then go ahead. Otherwise, move on with your life. He is not going to change oo! There is better out there you just have to be willing to hold out for it. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by dotunbond(m): 10:25pm On May 02, 2011 |
I would advice you not to consider quitting the relationship yet until you have objectively thought everything thru, Its a known fact that most men have tendencies to womanise,even d onces dat are faithful to their wives are fightin the temptation of cheatin on their wives.Did you see d signs durin the yrs of courtship,was he dedicated,is he truely remorseful.Ask him if you deserve what he did to you and if ur behaviour to him warranted what he did.Sincerly only you can be d best judge cos u know him better than anyone n d ultimate decision will be yours.Dont throw away ur time with him until ur sure it correct to do so. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by andyanders: 10:36pm On May 02, 2011 |
LISTEN, THE DEVIL YOU KNOW IS BETTER THAN THE THOUSAND ANGELS OUT THERE. LISTEN YOUNG LADY, FOR HIM TO SHOW REMORSE AND HAVE APOLOGIZED, WILL SHOW YOU THAT THE DEVIL PUSHED HIM INTO THIS 'COS DEVIL HAS SEEN THAT YOU WILL HAVE PEACE IN YOUR MARRIAGE WITH THE GUY IN FUTURE. NO ONE IS WITHOUT A SIN. ALSO, AS A CHILD OF GOD, HAVE YOU ASKED GOD IF THIS GUY IS YOUR HUSBAND. NOTE THIS, NO TWO PERFECT PEOPLE ON THIS EARTH. MARRIAGE IS ALL ABOUT ENDURANCE. DON'T LISTEN TO PEOPLE SUGGESTING THAT YOU DON'T FORGIVE HIM.WHAT IF YOU WERE IN HIS SHOES? LEARN TO FORGIVE. I AM MARRIED AND I STAND TO ADVISE YOU ON THIS. I SUGGEST, YOU SEEK THE FACE OF GOD. GO TO "SCOAN" SYNAGOGUE CHURCH OF ALL NATIONS AND IT WILL BE REVEALED TO YOU IF THE GUY IS YOUR REAL HUSBAND. FORGIVE HIM |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 10:38pm On May 02, 2011 |
^^^HAHAHAHA  Wow, I don't think I've heard that one before. |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by TruMantra(m): 11:07pm On May 02, 2011 |
@Rockchick, Nobody can tell you what's best to do but know this - if he's cheated on you already during the relationship and you decide to stay, you'll be faced with dealing with mistrust for a long time. He might be apologetic now, but when years have gone by and you havent gotten over his tryst, you'll start hearing "If you cant get over it, maybe we shouldnt be together" and the like. Plus, I'm a guy and I can tell you that we hardly get caught the first time. It is sooooo unlikely. But you are funny o! You had the presence of mind to take a good, long look at the girl and to see her "Mercy Johnson" type attributes. if she's so endowed that you, a babe would notice, perhaps you shouldnt blame a defenceless bloke after all.  |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by http(m): 11:57pm On May 02, 2011 |
@ poster, if u can't take him back, abeg carry go, no be by force afterall he is doing you a favour |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 12:00am On May 03, 2011 |
http: u soooo sick! @op, i hope you are not starting to hate your body and wish you had the 'mercy Johnson Body type', a man would cheat irrespective of the body type o!, Wish you the best in whateva decision you make |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 12:03am On May 03, 2011 |
http: u soooo sick! @op, i hope you are not starting to hate your body and wish you had the 'mercy Johnson Body type', a man would cheat irrespective of the body type o!, Wish you the best in whateva decision you make |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by 190: 12:04am On May 03, 2011 |
bhusayor: BULL CRAP!! Give me your body or mercy Johnson' and i promise never to cheat on you!! |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by Nobody: 12:12am On May 03, 2011 |
190: you no well, come take am, i actually meant a cheat will alw cheat irrespective of the body type, or do you want to tell me only lepa girs get cheated on?and endowed girls never get cheated on? |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by 190: 12:18am On May 03, 2011 |
bhusayor: with a body as shaped as yours, wetin man wan look again for outside |
| Re: Caught My Fiance Cheating: Kai, What Should I Do? by mazamaza: 12:21am On May 03, 2011 |
@rockchic, abeg don't listen to what anyone says here, but if you asked me, i would advise that you pray about it and if God gives you the peace you need to go ahead or dissociates you from him, that then would do. it's true that he cheated (and once they do, they always do - except the grace of God intervenes) and when you mentioned 'cheat on you regularly, could it also mean 'once in a while will do? 4years of dating and engaged (depending on how you feel about him is enough to talk to God about it, my dear, Although, i must confess this sort (minus the engagement) happened to me some 5 years ago - and even though i liked the guy, i saw through it that he was beyond redemption even though he seemed remorseful (this was after consulting with God) , I dropped him like he was hot and he begged for the next 5years up until last year but in my eyes, there was no trust, or respect and i just didnt want to know how it would have turned out eventually, if you eventually decide to leave him, put your faith in God to find someone who would have eyes only for you - there are a few men like that out there, i know that first hand, i wish you the best, man matter dey always get as e be, they just like to mess up a good thing and get away with it. |
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