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After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags - Romance (22) - Nairaland

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Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by pretzee(f): 9:27am On Jun 24, 2021
My dear, nairaland is a wrong place to seek for opinion on this kind of issue. Only few people will understand you.

[quote author=mugnmuffin post=103008721]Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by emanobis(m): 9:28am On Jun 24, 2021
All I can smell here is this: there is certainly one of Ur "New Church" pastors who is feeding your empty brain with plenty jagons.
U changed church and became SAVED right, but him as a Catholic is DOOMED? Just listen to yourself.
So what exactly is the Red-flag?
You in particular is the red flag here.
Creating a problem where there's none, fueled by your Penticostal Deceiver.

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by PrincessGlow: 9:29am On Jun 24, 2021
wirinet:

Na no "envy" whatsoever. We just allow each other to express themselves spiritually, the way it makes you happy.

My mum is Catholic and she gets along very well with my wife. Some Sundays my mum takes the children to Catholic mass. Some Sundays my wife takes them to winners chapel. Me I go to work on Sundays after dropping them off in church.

I should have said "admire" not "envy". I get your point though
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Aparche(f): 9:30am On Jun 24, 2021
@Op... It's only someone who is spiritual that will understand that you have a real problem. The fact is that many people here are either carnal christians or unbelievers who think that going to church is what Christianity is all about.

There's a reason why the bible says believers should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.

The fact remains that both of you are not spiritually compatible. And in the long run his spirituality or non-spirituality is going to affect yours.

Just know that for a born again Christian, the question of who to marry is an important spiritual junction; and the decision you take can make or mar you for all eternity.

Life is not just about the physical.

3 Likes

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by johnlegend01: 9:30am On Jun 24, 2021
alexvic12:
She didn't disdain the Catholic Church. When you become born again, you'll discover that there are certain things that you may never get to learn about in the Catholic church; things that are essential to a deeper spiritual life. It's the truth.
There is no honest catholic who listens to Apostle Selman, Orokpo, etc. and will not hunger for more.



Please where can we meet? I feel like gifting you 999 wonderful slaps

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by hardon1(m): 9:32am On Jun 24, 2021
She is simply seeing someone else period!

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by jubrilELsudan: 9:33am On Jun 24, 2021
mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...



YOU ARE VERY STUPID.

2 Likes

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by TuFab(f): 9:35am On Jun 24, 2021
binary007:
You dated for 3 years and you are just getting convinced that he isn't the one after introduction?





I can't stop laughing..... Lolzzzzzzzz
Her spirit husband is the one talking, not her.
Please free than fine young man and let him see road to marry a reasonable woman.
So catholics are not Christians abi, they're idol worshippers. I can't stand fanatics gosh....
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by obowunmi(m): 9:36am On Jun 24, 2021
mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...

Men who want to settle down are becoming harder to find. If he is kind and hardworking, you better marry him.
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by babajide107: 9:38am On Jun 24, 2021
I don’t even understand your point..Does being a Catholic means you are not saved??who told you such lie??
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Oshomo12(m): 9:39am On Jun 24, 2021
Raalsalghul:
Can someone tell what the red flags are?

RED FLAG:
The girl na MUMU

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Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by PrincessGlow: 9:41am On Jun 24, 2021
Aparche:
@Op... It's only someone who is spiritual that will understand that you have a real problem. The fact is that many people here are either carnal christians or unbelievers who think that going to church is what Christianity is all about.

There's a reason why the bible says believers should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers.

The fact remains that both of you are not spiritually compatible. And in the long run his spirituality or non-spirituality is going to affect yours.

Just know that for a born again Christian, the question of who to marry is an important spiritual junction; and the decision you take can make or mar you for all eternity.

Life is not just about the physical.


But you talk as if human beings do not evolve and change. Churches change too. Many of these MOG's faking miracles and "raping" girls were once truly devout Christians. So bear in mind, she'd change and so will he. Guaranteed. But there is a core to a person that rarely changes, that's what she should be looking at, not what church
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Nobody: 9:41am On Jun 24, 2021
Sister, I started dating my husband 2003, whereas he was a catholic, I was Anglican. I later got saved and started Pentecostal. I went to him, led him to Christ and left. Of a truth...he was everything I wanted in a man, but the catholic part of it...he later proposed, I accepted though I stopped having intimacy with him prior to the proposal. We agreed to wed in catholic while I continued to attend my Pentecostal though he accepted going to Pentecostal with me (remember, he was everything moral, atleast 90%). On the day of the wedding, it was cancelled because the family refused me going to Pentecostal. But being that we had done both the trad and court wedding before the church wedding that was cancelled, we agreed living together. Years after, he fully joined me to Pentecostal after having two children. His family talked and talked but he is being standing his ground. My dear, my take on this is this, if he has a moral character at least very okay for God to mark him good, push aside the catholic and go ahead. Except you know that his personality is actually not what you want for a husband. Pray, and if you have peace to live with him, please go ahead. I have come to understand that God doesn't actually judge the way we do. When we get to heaven, we know who is who. May you receive divine direction in Jesus name.

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by kelvinjames01: 9:43am On Jun 24, 2021
You are delusional my friend. People like u throw away common sense to follow religion.
infogenius:


Good u're seeing properly now and not when you are married.

If u're not spiritually connected, kindly end the relationship.
Spirituality is far more important than physical attributes.

If only many youths can see this way before getting married
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Hassanmaye(m): 9:44am On Jun 24, 2021
Johnsown1:
Please don't marry him, he is not your other half. Because Catholics are not christains and Pentecostals are the true christains. Fast for 80 days for cleansing then ask one of your pastors to marry you since they are closer to your God. Shalom
Can please keep quite Catholic are more Christian than any Christian faith in the world they practice the true Christianity I'm aboki but I'm telling you this
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by incogni2o: 9:45am On Jun 24, 2021
mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...

Firstly, You said too many, but there is nothing like too many in what you wrote

You should understand that something is exagerating the current situation in your eyes.

In as much as it's a risk marrying an unbeliever, I guess you have to understand that even so called beleivers have thier own issues

God loves everyone and is working on us all, Both calling sinners to repentance and Born again Christians for a closer walk.

Make your Guy understand your current stance (and firmly). Just know it may take time to digest it for Him.

Go back to God in Prayer.

Your Life is now a Book He reads, I am sure If he truely Loves you, You will eventually draw him to God, combined with your Prayers.

Just be sensitive to know what the Spirit of God is saying and also sensitive to the manipulation of the Devil.

Some have fallen for it and are still unmarried in thier 40s.

I Pray God gives you Wisdom.

Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation of the wives;

Amen.

Lastly, If you eventually marry Him, His salvation should be a Project 1 of your marriage, so be ready to Pray Pray and Pray until something happen (PUSH).

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by rosalieene(f): 9:46am On Jun 24, 2021
Qualer:


you fine come get plenty sense!!
I have a garden and a bottle of wine for you!! cool
Thank you cheesy
I await the bottle of wine.
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by rosalieene(f): 9:47am On Jun 24, 2021
Johnsown1:
Please don't marry him, he is not your other half. Because Catholics are not christains and Pentecostals are the true christains. Fast for 80 days for cleansing then ask one of your pastors to marry you since they are closer to your God. Shalom
Good sarcasm cheesy

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Okey80: 9:48am On Jun 24, 2021
If am that man, I'll leave your sorry ass and go marry someone else. You're a perfect definition of a religious bigot.

You're doomed rather than saved.
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by willyacious: 9:51am On Jun 24, 2021
I think u should seek the face of God first before taking any further actions. He still might be the one.
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by PrincessGlow: 9:52am On Jun 24, 2021
Hassanmaye:

Can please keep quite Catholic are more Christian than any Christian faith in the world they practice the true Christianity I'm aboki but I'm telling you this

But he's being sarcastic na. Some of you guys are so dense

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Bahose(m): 9:52am On Jun 24, 2021
mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...
you are really confused and you are ignorant of so many things.That Pentecostal you join feeling that you born again is someone personal business. If you have opportunity to travel abroad you will regret this stupid decision you will still come out and join another one, if I am that guy I not marry you because you will end up obeying pastors than listen to your husband.

2 Likes

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Akakanfirstclass(m): 9:55am On Jun 24, 2021
mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...


I know the problem...

The problem is that.. You've seen a new suitor at ur new place of worship..
An u admire and celebrate his "Grace" around you...

Hence ur mind... (Not your conscious self)
But ur mind begins to provide reasons to why you should throe away d old toy and accept the new one,..
And the excuse ur mind is giving u is diz Pentecostal and catholic bruhaha..

My Ernest advice is..

Never marry by prophecy..
Never marry from a religious angle..
Becoz no be God send u that one o..
God's priority is that u make heaven...
Marriage is d institution of men, a gift from God..
Do it as it suits you..

Therefore marry whosoever gives you peace of mind...

1 Like 1 Share

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by sterlingD(m): 9:55am On Jun 24, 2021
The lady is confused. Let her take sometime out to sort her self .It is good to be spiritually inclined. The path to spiritually inclination starts with the bust into spirituality ;the spiritual enlightenment stage. How well she handles herself in this stage will determine how her total well being (Spiritual, Intellectual, Social,Economical,Physical and Emotional) will be.

This stage is a very crucial stage because at this stage there is spiritual vulnerability. This is where you are open to all manner of spiritual confusion; you can either be swayed to the left and to the right at the same time or swayed to the left or to the right by quoting various verses of the scriptures subjectively. You can be brainwashed and you wont really know or see it .At this point you may not be fully objective with your thoughts,words and action as you think. There is a verse in the book of Proverbs which says Guard your heart with all diligence for out of it flows the issues of life (Quoted numerous times by the late Chaz B)

Let her take time out go to God pour out her heart,hold nothing back, tell God everything( her worries and fears in quote) also seek the counsel of well seasoned married couples who have been through the thick and thin of marriage for advise. Not forgetting read the scriptures and where you lack understanding seek God directly your eyes will be open and you will have understanding. Note all the while involve your parents carry them along ( They may even be part of the well seasoned married couples whom you meet to air your concerns).Whatever decision you take from there it is up to you and its on you.

1 Like

Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Plebian(f): 9:55am On Jun 24, 2021
You're his problem, your religion will eventually drive you mad. I've been there, and truly truly I hope he leaves you earlier.
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by martooski(m): 9:57am On Jun 24, 2021
mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...

Please help me tell the good man that wanted to marry you to please leave and forget you because you are still immature for marriage. Go and marry your god.
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by Bryan88(m): 9:57am On Jun 24, 2021
I STOPPED READING WHEN YOU MADE CATHOLIC LOOK LIKE AN OCCULTIC ORGANISATION. YOU GAVE YOUR LIFE TO CHRIST AND LEFT CATHOLIC ASIN HOW COS I DONT GET? WATCH WHAT YOU SAY OR WRITE WOMAN B4 THE WRATH OF GOD FALLS ON YOU
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by poiZon: 9:57am On Jun 24, 2021
mugnmuffin:
Dear Nairalanders,
I have an issue that has been on my mind for weeks now. My fiancé and I have been dating for over three years. I love him and he loves me too. We are physically attracted to each other. We’re both catholic but since I graduated, during my service year I gave my life to Christ, got saved and left the Catholic Church. So I’ve been a Pentecostal Christian since then. He on the other hand is still catholic. I subtly try to nudge him to consider getting saved, i.e acknowledging Christ as lord and savior and becoming born again but he is content with his laidback Christian life.

Earlier this year, he asked to meet my parents and I let him. My parents like him especially because my younger sis is married and they have been waiting for me too. They’re glad I’ve someone. However, after the introduction,I regret it. I’m now certain that he’s not the one. I think about my spiritual life and how lukewarm he is about the things of God, I think about kids and how we’ll raise the, with such differing views about God and I’m discouraged. I feel like I’m settling because he checks all the boxes on the checklist of physical attributes. Another mistake I made is, I didn’t pray about this decision and that worries me because anything that involves him,I just act with pausing to ask God, but I always ask God about other aspects of my life. So it’s like my associating with him is a minus for my spiritual life and that’s a huge cause for concern.

At this point, I want to tell my parents I am not convinced it’s him but I’m afraid of the disappointment this will cause. *sigh* I’ll appreciate your thoughts, comments, criticisms...
Even ur name doesnt sound christianic..
Re: After Introduction, I’m Seeing Too Many Red Flags by tifelola(f): 9:59am On Jun 24, 2021
Giftexx:
U were never a Catholic cos if after baptism and confirmation, you still think u are not born again, then...

God bless you! Imagine she saying she got saved,born again and gave her life to Christ after these two great sacraments..I'm sure she would be a communicant. But what do the small me know

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