Kadejo:


You think so, I have decided to come out to seek for advice so as to guide my decision.
Never say never bro

Please, don't waste your time with her. Everybody is selfish in this life, she'll leave you when she sees a better man. She can be married while schooling, many ladies do that for men they love. Try and have a backup plan

BigBashiru:


those 28 and above are no more very attractive.... that's the problem. who no like better thing?? if he marries a 28yr old he most likely will be caught up in scandals with younger girls..... it's nature.

As for going for younger girls, who no like better thing??

Younger Girls are good and sweet...but they are only good as a Girlfriend or side chick...

Even if he needs to marry a 25yrs, She should be out of School and working already

Parizz:
an 18 oyr old can marry but does she have the mental capacity to cope in marriage

says who, from the earlies till 80's most of our mothers married before 25yrs and they make a wonder wife and maintain their homes till date. moreover, omotola married captain b4 she was 20yrs and amara married kanu when she was merely 18yrs.
I am not advocating for child/teen marriage, buh my notion remains maturity for ladies no be by age or independence.
what are the things women do in a man's house that requires mental capacity, is it chores, breastfeeding & nursing a baby or bedmatics ... all these are natural capacity that why a mad woman can still nurse her baby and not kill the baby
The requisite to survive in a marriage is commitment, contentment and tolerance.

Raalsalghul:


It will be in your own interest, family's and Nigeria as a whole to stop with this mentality of getting married with 50k/30k.

Poverty levels are high and we should cancel any words, opinion, advice, writing encouraging such.

Thank you.

whether poverty level is high or not, the poor will marry just as the rich also marry ... time wait for nobody just don't carry weytin pass you as a man. moreover no condition is permanent so many super rich couples started off with nothing. in 2010 i av a bros that got married without a job, his parent were the ones sorting him, i go look am do tufiakwa buh today the bro owns two houses in lagos plus cars. one can never say just have a means to carter for responsibility @least

Marriage no be for everybody.marrying at 29
30 is late.jux say country hard na why naija men dey marry late.

Vinnie2000:


If she is cool, fine and respectful generally, Wait..Be patient!

Do not Rush into marriage with any Available young lady because you are 34..
Pple still see Marriage as a Competition!
It's the ability of a Man to bring up a beautiful family and Cater for them, without Stress!

When I see some 29, 30 yrs Guys rushing into Marriage, I just Pity some of Dem!..

My dear you are very wrong..why are you asking me if he should pick any girl from the street and marry?did you mention that he wants to pick just any girl?how can you advice a man of 34 years to wait so such a girl?with strikes he has like 5 years to wait for this girl which will make him 39 to 40 years then?what is it about the girl really?a girl that wants to do girls things(what ever that means)before getting married..
I don't blame the girl for wanting these things but she is not the right person for this guy at the moment..if you had advised the guy to get something that pays more before getting married it would have been better but the guy mentioned that he does business too so the salary is not a problem..he should get involved with someone else..

Vinnie2000:



So he should just pick any Girl from the Street and Marry, abi?

It's marriage we talking about here o..

He loves the lady and if she loves him too, He should Wait!..

Kadejo:
I have been on Nairaland since 2010, today, marks a turning point.

I am overwhelmed with responses so far.

Please note that I wouldn't mind your calls as well because, this is a crucial time for me.

My number is on my signature.

Nairaland team, thank you for taking my heart burn thought to front page.

forget about her and move on

dominique:


Totally wrong! Sisi basically means spinsterhood. Are you trying to say all women slept around in their youths?

probably

Kadejo:
I meet this lady during COVID-19 pandemic period which was last year May 2020. She is still a student in a reputable University here in Nigeria, 300Level to be precise. She is 25years old.
She has insisted that until she finishes her school, gone for service and do what ladies call "Sisi" for at least another one year, she won't get married. That will be about 4years to this time.

I am in my mid 30s already, working class, earn below #70k per month, also into IT business, willing to get married now because I feel lonely, also need to build a family of my own before I turn 40yrs.

This lady in question appears to show me love, that's to her own way, my orientation is a bit different, I love her too anyways.

But would you advice I wait for her till she is done with all she has said or should I leave her and look for someone else to get married to?

Please, no insult, advice needed from experienced person.

Thank you.

From my experience with women, she's not ready because she feels you aren't ready. She's giving you time to develop and build yourself which is very okay. She doesn't want to pressure you. You are the one pressuring yourself. Less than 70k is too low to start a family in Nigeria now except you live in the far north. She knows you earn below what she really want. Believe me if you are very comfortable and earn well she won't say that. She will marry you tomorrow if you want. Don't think she doesn't love you or only concern about money. Her refusal shows she does. She doesn't want you to run mad. I don't know where you live but earning below 70k and making attempt to marry a student that doesn't earn anything; a total responsibility her parents would hand over to you once you pay her pride price is suicidal

VTJN:
Wahala for nairaland

You mean marriage should be a girl priority, especially those in their 20-22?

Are you sure we both attended this same conventional schools here in Nigeria?

There's nothing wrong being single in your 20s 30s, and even 40s. There's absolutely nothing wrong being single without a man or woman. Being single is not leprosy. Stop putting yourself or people under pressure to date thereby dating stupid people.

You're complete with or without a man or woman. You'd be successful even being single. You'd live life to the fullest even being single

Anyone who may come across with this. If you like, let anyone pressure you to be married. If you like allow them tell you there's everything wrong with you because you are single. Na still you go suffer am, it's none of my business

I like your thought process.

Well I hope she will come to you after she complete her school, cos girls feels vultron on their guy after school .

May God help you.

Iyaebe:
You are wasting your time with someone who's not ready,look for someone who's ready and do the needful.

Am telling you bro after school she will be forming Vultron on him, he better move on oo

I have never and will
Never marry a Nigerian

My mindset has always been to Marry an American

And that’s what happened some days back

Congrats to me I’m a Nigerian American now

Kadejo:
I meet this lady during COVID-19 pandemic period which was last year May 2020. She is still a student in a reputable University here in Nigeria, 300Level to be precise. She is 25years old.
She has insisted that until she finishes her school, gone for service and do what ladies call "Sisi" for at least another one year, she won't get married. That will be about 4years to this time.

I am in my mid 30s already, working class, earn below #70k per month, also into IT business, willing to get married now because I feel lonely, also need to build a family of my own before I turn 40yrs.

This lady in question appears to show me love, that's to her own way, my orientation is a bit different, I love her too anyways.

But would you advice I wait for her till she is done with all she has said or should I leave her and look for someone else to get married to?

Please, no insult, advice needed from experienced person.

Thank you.

I really pity you my bro. Scarcity mentality is heavy upon you because of your financial situation.
A woman who loves you is EAGER. Always remember that. The person you are with right now values you as low as your income is but you are attached to her because you're scared about losing her, knowing how women these days are objects that gravitate towards the best source of financial incentives.
I would advice you to accept your reality and stop looking for love from Nigerian women. They have none to give. Work hard on yourself to secure a bag and acquire a better and more submissive version of this your girl who you can control with your money and who will show you EAGERNESS. A woman giving you conditions is never the way to go

Kraytur:
I have never and will
Never marry a Nigerian

My mindset has always been to Marry an American

And that’s what happened some days back

Congrats to me I’m a Nigerian American now

If this is true you're blessed. I keep saying I can never marry a Nigerian woman. Never ever

pocohantas:
When you were younger, girls were rushing you for just having a penis, you thought it will remain like that? You convinced yourself that you will see a wife anytime you are ready.

Now you are 34 with 70k salary and you are looking for a girl in her prime to rush into marriage. A girl that is very sure she can still meet a better man.

You men do not like to tell yourselves the truth. The major attraction to an older man is his FINANCIAL CAPABILITY. If you don’t have that, 300L girls will use you and do yeye. If you have it, they will still use you and cruise, but them no go get mind tell you this kind nonsense to your face . Na Round 1 be this. When they are done with you, you will give up on marriage.

You think say na 1872 we dey?

Better go find one mature lady with a stable source of income and marry.

What do you mean by "The major attraction to an older man is his FINANCIAL CAPABILITY"?

Why are you twisting the obvious?

Parizz:
any girl below 26, 27 is highly fertile

I beg to defer. It is not rocket science to know that being old is relative. A 40 year old woman will give birth to 10 kids if not careful. While the 20 year old lady will find it difficult to conceive. Age slows down fertility quite alright but, it is not a guarantee to have sex recklessly just cos one might not conceive due to age. Some people whether we like it or not are more fertile. A fifty year old that still menstruate will conceive than someone mush more younger. FERTILITY DOES NOT RESPECT AGE

no be juju be that

crownedrookie:

If this is true you're blessed. I keep saying I can never marry a Nigerian woman. Never ever

I’m talking September 3 2021

I got married to my American fiancé here in Nigeria

Raalsalghul:


I like your thought process.

Thanks bro

Kraytur:
I have never and will
Never marry a Nigerian

My mindset has always been to Marry an American

And that’s what happened some days back

Congrats to me I’m a Nigerian American now

Same with me. I always known I will never marry a Nigerian man. Thank God am already on the path I just pray God finalize everything.

Ramanto:

Please, don't waste your time with her. Everybody is selfish in this life, she'll leave you when she sees a better man. She can be married while schooling, many ladies do that for men they love. Try and have a backup plan

you are right... and many girls have back up plans too... thats why once they end things with one guy next week you will hear she has her wedding coming up... cos she had had a back up plan all along.

pocohantas:
When you were younger, girls were rushing you for just having a penis, you thought it will remain like that? You convinced yourself that you will see a wife anytime you are ready.

Now you are 34 with 70k salary and you are looking for a girl in her prime to rush into marriage. A girl that is very sure she can still meet a better man.

You men do not like to tell yourselves the truth. The major attraction to an older man is his FINANCIAL CAPABILITY. If you don’t have that, 300L girls will use you and do yeye. If you have it, they will still use you and cruise, but them no go get mind tell you this kind nonsense to your face . Na Round 1 be this. When they are done with you, you will give up on marriage.

You think say na 1872 we dey?

Better go find one mature lady with a stable source of income and marry.

You no well…

Yes ooo



But what are you waiting for when we have loads of babes here in E n V

https://www.nairaland.com/6410473/hottest-whatsapp-group-nigeria-200#98963227

Raalsalghul:


It will be in your own interest, family's and Nigeria as a whole to stop with this mentality of getting married with 50k/30k.

Poverty levels are high and we should cancel any words, opinion, advice, writing encouraging such.

Thank you.

Go and dissolve the marriage of those that married collecting 50k salary. Even those ones that have grown to now be collecting times ten of that. While you are at it, start from your own people before the outside world. By the way, I don't know where you got your 30k salary. Is it that you've someone earning that amount that is married?

Alexandre7:




You no well…

I don’t trust this your laugh.

iamL:


Same with me. I always known I will never marry a Nigerian man. Thank God am already on the path I just pray God finalize everything.

No no the men are ok is the Women that are terrible I haven’t met you o but if you’re seeking love overseas then good for you but Nigerian women in general omooooo X 100

dominique:
She's keeping her options open for a more financially stable man. Better keep your options open as well else premium disappoinment loading.

Youthful unmarried lady. Doing sisi basically means enjoying life as a spinster

Honestly we should have just stuck to our parent's old ways of arranged marriage. This thing called keeping options open is good & bad at the same time.

This is what I have noticed, you meet a lady around 21 - 28, you ask her if she is single, she says Yes. 99% of the time they are never single, they are in a relationship / situationship but just waiting for someone richer & better to come along.

99% of Lekki Rich boys aren't interested in settling down too, they keep their eyes open for ladies that are exploring a more financially stable man.

In reality, we all end up dating about 3 to 5 Men or Women at the same time. Then disappointing all of them & choosing one to settle with.

Kraytur:


No no the men are ok is the Women that are terrible I haven’t met you o but if you’re seeking love overseas then good for you but Nigerian women in general omooooo X 100

I rather marry an Afghanistan man than a Nigerian man, the men here generally are are 0-0.