Acidosis:


Nah. He knows too well to identify the right opinion, what to accept and what to reject.

Btw, parents also come to social media to solicit opinions about their kids, upload stuff about their kids, making them vulnerable to strangers.

Could not agree more with your last two comments, and many of the others before. Only God knows if this man is living off the grace of his wife - just because he is abroad does not mean he is rich and everything is rosy.

Building the house before marriage and now with funds from the wife tells me a lot more about his situation...
Abroad people should always be wary about doing anything in Nigeria... There are now organisations or folks setting up scheme to help abroad folks to invest, including building in Nigeria. Phrankleen the blogger has too many cases of folks be diddled and frustrated by their nearest and dearest - he has in fact collaborated with others to help abroad folks through the processes of investing in Nigeria. A word is enough for the wise!

Lastly, it is not ideal to flaunt wealth or build wealth through people that are not so wealthy themselves but since the project had already started and he will also be abused for putting someone not family in charge... Damned! One way or the other!

Kehindeaj78:
I live outside the country but I entrusted my house development with my parents in Nigeria, but they leave in a rented apartment. They're are due for new rent payment at their rented apartment which i sent them the money, only for them to call me that they don't want to rent another apartment again and have moved into my ongoing house and used the money to do somethings in the ongoinghouse. What do I do?

you should be happy you have parents to enjoy your wealth. pleaese !

Kehindeaj78:
I live outside the country but I entrusted my house development with my parents in Nigeria, but they leave in a rented apartment. They're are due for new rent payment at their rented apartment which i sent them the money, only for them to call me that they don't want to rent another apartment again and have moved into my ongoing house and used the money to do somethings in the ongoinghouse. What do I do?

Oshare, let them be, as African, we owe it to our parents to always provide and care for them.

Leave that house for them.

..

Acidosis:



The toxic comments are not directed at both OPs. I don't know how else to address someone that called the OP a witch for raising her concerns or the other bragging about using juju on his wife. As for the other guy I called out unprovoked, I have apologized and some comments already have been deleted.

Now to the OP (husband), EVERYTHING I had mentioned are things I would do 100% to make my home work if I were in his shoes. I would not sit back and expect my wife to accept or (as you have recommended) simply let love reign. If she decides to, then fair enough, but I would still ensure her contributions are appropriately refunded directly or indirectly.

The fact that he's been on that project before marriage is a pointer that these guys are probably not as wealthy as some people think. If he was that wealthy, why hasn't he completed the project even with his wife's contributions and despite engaging his father as the project manager? So the idea of building another project is simply an idea or wishful thinking - same thought we had when we were kids. I remember saying I was going to buy Lamborghini for my parents before age 30. I've crossed that age now and Lamborghini is still "cooking."

If God blesses them so much to do even more, of course, nobody will have to tell anybody what to do for his or her parents.

It is OK to be concerned about OP's parents. But on this case, I'm more concerned about the future of their marriage. The parents' issue as far as I'm concerned is secondary as they were never homeless. It's totally fine to let the parents have the new home after all no sensible child will forcefully evict his/her parents.

Well said...God bless you.

NoToPile:


People don't understand how complex this situation he posted can get, the fact that they moved there without telling him is something I can't wrap my head around.

Na wa

Exactly! The type of comments I have been reading on this thread shows a high sense of entitlement from our people. How can they move into the house without telling him? I am sure they even called pastors or Imams to pray and threw house warming party.

Finances, properties are some of the things that can wreck a marriage. Op has been put into a delicate situation with his wife. I for one, would never have it. Throwing them out now is almost impossible and will cause a lot of bad blood. But it is best he let's them know the position of the house and that it belongs to him and his wife.
I hope op doesn't have any strong headed siblings? They will join and claim the house and turn it into a family house. It is well.

enesexy:
please don't listen to those people asking what will you do, tell them the truth about both you and your wife contribution for the house. You and your family should come to an agreement that they will be there pending you and your wife will need the house... This is one of the reasons why I will never build a house with my husband.

And I hope you wont claim any personal property your husband has due to the fact that you're married to him?
Everything he has is his, are you cool with that?

SaintUlot:


Living abroad and building a house in Nigeria is a waste of money, it does not make any sense. The op would not eventually have no use for the house, the parents already foresaw this and that's why the relocated to the house.

The Op didn't post complete story. The wife created a thread and apparently she lives in Naija.
He travelled after they got married, and they have been contributing to build it together for years.

I'm trying to understand how the people commenting here completely disregards the wife’s financial involvement as if she's not a person.
If I were in that marriage, my husband will repay every amount I saved to put in that house. Also, that will be the end of any joint investment in that family.

His parents will lose their respect in the presence of their daughter Inlaw for being so badly behaved and disrespectful, and the fact that people here condone and justify this behaviour explains why Nigeria is able to go to shit as a country.

Our leaders are really a reflection of our people.

Where will he get the money for another house? Nigerians and their entitlement mentality!
House wey op de build with him wife! What if na di wife parents moved in? Una for call them evil and bad family with a bad daughter!
Make una fear God oh!

nokspos:
your story put a smile on my face, what else can a parent wish for. I wish you more success but free those people, let them enjoy the fruit of their labour. When you are back , build their on apartment in the same compound , structure it in a way that they won't disturb your own family maybe with some kind of fencing . Or build their own house for them in another location, its clear that they are tired of being a tenant, even if you build for them , its still your own house someday... and it not bad to have many properties. God will continue enriching your pocket.

you don't have any point , you must always consider family's apartments in your building , that's why there's boys squatters. Parent are too big to let down on such big deals , especially when they've already shown interest, why do you think most of these celebs first build for their parents before even building for themselves. you have no idea the kind of blessing that comes with these things. i'm a living testimony, the reward is magnificent bro.

sorepco:
Where will he get the money for another house? Nigerians and their entitlement mentality!
House wey op de build with him wife! What if na di wife parents moved in? Una for call them evil and bad family with a bad daughter!
Make una fear God oh!

No matter how much the patents struggled to raise this man, they are not justified to move ibto the apartment without mentioning it earlier.
It is even more wrong because he is already married.
If they are genuinely this close to their son, mentioning it should not be a problem. He may have a sibling or other relatives who would move in and never plan to leave. His wife may have more of the income that built this house and it does not appear beat that her in-laws just moved in.
Never the less, it is hopeful that we all out-live out parents and in that case, even if it were their own house, it would be inherited by the children afterall.

Instead of mak you Dey happy you Dey ask for advice
It's been 2yrs now
Hope u don realize say nothing wrong

Teleprompter:
No matter how much the patents struggled to raise this man, they are not justified to move ibto the apartment without mentioning it earlier.
It is even more wrong because he is already married.
If they are genuinely this close to their son, mentioning it should not be a problem. He may have a sibling or other relatives who would move in and never plan to leave. His wife may have more of the income that built this house and it does not appear beat that her in-laws just moved in.
Never the less, it is hopeful that we all out-live out parents and in that case, even if it were their own house, it would be inherited by the children afterall.

Ewu without no shame

FahBuLous:
Don't do anything...
They are your parents, if you really love them, let them live there for now... When you are back from outside the country, Rent another apartment for them...

I know people value their privacy alot...

He can't rent another apartment for them... it's like an abomination for them to move from "their house" to a rented apartment. If it's a bungalow, he should just find a way to lock one room. If he's lucky and it's 4 or 2, they take one he stays in one. The parents should have been a little more considerate and seek his consent in my opinion