Nice Thread....

So many views

Some foolish, some wise.

Some foolishly wise, Some wisely Foolish .

Let’s all just try to do better Gracias.....

Hyerin:


Defence is another thing entirely, it's not an indication of this supposedly unconditional love. How many laymen are willing to fight and shed blood for their country? With this logic then politicians, senators, presidents, doctors, lawyers etc and all other professions that deals with people or impact their lives all have unconditional love for people since their line of work affect them in some way. Men getting drafted into war are forced to, there's no altruistic motive on their part. What about interpersonal relationships? Men are the perpetrators of intimate partner violence; domestic physical and sexual assault; familicide; incest etc. Upholders of infidelity and are six times more likely to leave their wives if she gets sick or disabled so were exactly is this unconditional love coming from? Some parents don't even love their own children unconditionally not to even talk of men, the worst of the worst in showing genuine affection. Almost everything men do is primarily motivated by selfishness; he is self-seeking. All the prerequisites and demands in being "wife material" you lot enjoy disturbing the peace with are what? Not conditions abi? You must have constructed your own reality because what you asserted doesn't align with objective facts.

"Argue with the void" is an expression signifying a disinterest in furthering discourse, dimwit.

You said a lot there ... for a start. Women and men express love very differently. Women express love by nurturing, exclusive sex to one partner and faithfulness. Women are built to follow and respect/ pair bond with people they love. A nun in love will support her drug dealer husband irrespective of her values. In our natural state the female of most species are weaker and smaller than the males. Women since time immemorial have always needed to survive by pairing and matng with the strongest male to protect her/ offspring. A woman's response to this protection and provision is expressed emotionally a.k.a love.
Men on the other hand, love differently and this is where blue pillers get it wrong. Men naturally have evolved for defense, labor, resilience, gritt. Succinctly put a man is built with the capability to destroy, kill, invade . HOWEVER he is also built to act with rationality more often.Theres a reason men have nor destroyed the world with nuclear bombs yet they possess the power to do so. So these traits are usually docile and only come out when needed(exceptions exist though). Men don't express love by sexual excluvity, nurturing and etc men do this by providing security, protection and would die in the process. A man would in his natural state, go hunting ( solitary)/ gather or conquer other men and bring the spoils to his woman/ family while expecting nothing in return. This is how men show love. A King can marry a slave and automatically she becomes a queen.. a queen will not even look at peasant talk less of love. cos she gains no security.
Sex for men is like scratching an itch. Man isn't even designed for one woman biologically. When it comes to reproduction a woman has a far greater burden of investment as she would be demobilised for 40 weeks thus she needs to mate with the best she can get with. A weak male doesn't get to mate in the natural order. On the other hand, the man can make 40 + babies in the same period while stI'll conquering and hunting/ providing. This doesn't make him aberrant. That's just how he's built. Men are not the only ones committing all the sex crimes in the home heck .. most of us were disvirgined by sexual predators and cougars ie our aunties and big cousins. We even have mothers in lagos sleeping with their sons, mother in laws sleeping with daughters husbands... it goes both ways but sex affects women more which is why any sensible society should protect and if possible repress female sexuality.
We can argue men and women face domestic abuse in the west but with the laws in place women are committing more domestic abuse these days because the laws tilt towards female bias. The implication .. men abandoning marrIage/ pairing with women in droves, children raised without protection from the male and a bunch of dysfunctional men that act emmotionally cos they were raised as women. Death of society.

Go and read the history of WW2 Germany to add a few. Once the German machine fell, the invading Red army and allied forces descended on the women and offspring of the germans. They r#ped what ever they found NOT just to bust a nut, but ensure the German society was wiped out. Guess what the women did to survive? They pair bonded and married the new marauding conquerors for protection. THEY FELL IN LOVE. Then the men began to protect the ones they loved from other soldiers. They had children with them and voila the former men were history.
The truth is EVERY SOCIETY THAT ATTEMPTED BLURRING THE LINES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN CRASHED/ IMPLODED..Roman,Japan Hausa Egyptian empires etc

revolt:
[s]You said a lot there ... for a start. Women and men express love very differently. Women express love by nurturing, exclusive sex to one partner and faithfulness. Women are built to follow and respect/ pair bond with people they love. A nun in love will support her drug dealer husband irrespective of her values. In our natural state the female of most species are weaker and smaller than the males. Women since time immemorial have always needed to survive by pairing and matng with the strongest male to protect her/ offspring. A woman's response to this protection and provision is expressed emotionally a.k.a love.
Men on the other hand, love differently and this is where blue pillers get it wrong. Men naturally have evolved for defense, labor, resilience, gritt. Succinctly put a man is built with the capability to destroy, kill, invade . HOWEVER he is also built to act with rationality more often.Theres a reason men have nor destroyed the world with nuclear bombs yet they possess the power to do so. So these traits are usually docile and only come out when needed. When it comes to love, men on the other hand don't express by sexual excluvity, nurturing and etc men do this by providing security, protection and would die in the process. A man would in his natural state, go hunting ( solitary)/ gather or conquer other men and bring the spoils to his woman/ family while expecting nothing in return. This is how men show love. A King can marry a slave and automatically she becomes a queen.. a queen will nor even look at peasant or love him cos she gains no security.
Sex for men is like scratching an itch. Man isn't even designed for one woman biologically. When it comes to reproduction a woman has a far greater burden of investment as she would be demobilised for 40 weeks and it she would need to ensure she mated with the right male. A weak male doesn't get to mate in the natural order. On the other hand the man can make 40 + babies in the same period while stI'll conquering and hunting/ providing. This doesn't make him aberrant. That's just how he's built. Men are not the only ones committing all the sex crimes in the home heck .. most of us were disvirgined by sexual predators and cougars whom were our aunties and big cousins. We even have mothers in lagos sleeping with their sons, mother in laws sleeping with daughters husbands... it goes both ways but sex affects women more which is why any sensible society should protect and if possible repress female sexuality/ behavioirs.
We can argue men and women face domestic abuse in the west but with the laws in place women are committing more domestic abuse these days because the laws tilt towards female bias. The implication .. men abandoning marrIage pairing with women in droves, children raised without protection from the male and a bunch of dysfunctional men that act emmotionally cos they were raised as women. Death of society.

Go and read the history of WW2 Germany to add a few. Once German machine fell, the invading Red army and allied forces descended on the women and offspring of the germans. They r#ped what ever they found NOT to bust a nut but make sure the German society was wiped out. Guess what the women did to survive? They pair bonded and married the new marauding conquerors for protection. THEY FELL IN LOVE. Then the men began to protect the ones they loved from other soldiers. They had children with them and voila the former men were history.
The truth is EVERY SOCIETY THAT ATTEMPTED BLURRING THE LINES BETWEEN MEN AND WOMEN CRASHED/ IMPLODED..Roman,Japan Hausa Egyptian empires etc [/s]

Just a bunch of evopsych (that has been widely debunked and invalidated by the scientific community) and ahistorical, MRA nonsense put together. Not only is this complete garbage but reductionist as well as off point. Let me guess, you're a redpiller. Explains the low I.Q

I will reiterate, nobody loves unconditionally; not men, not women. The only unconditional love that exists (this can even be contested) is familial love; one between a parent and their child, and if you're religious, then it's God who is capable of that. You just wasted your time typing out this bullshit for nothing

Hyerin:


Just a bunch of evopsych (that has been widely debunked and invalidated by the scientific community) and ahistorical, MRA nonsense put together. Not only is this complete garbage but reductionist as well as off point. Let me guess, you're a redpiller. Explains the low I.Q

I will reiterate, nobody loves unconditionally; not men, not women. The only unconditional love that exists (this can even be contested) is familial love; one between a parent and their child, and if you're religious, then it's God who is capable of that. You just wasted your time typing out this bullshit for nothing

As usual I gave you empirical facts and history to read yet as typical blue pill ediots always do, they argue with emotions and abuse/ shaming tactics ... NEVER debunking facts or putting up superior points. Lol scientific comm indeed...

DrFunmisticGlow:
Nope

Will you agree before?

Your lot are the unruly ones jare.

Una go dey alright last last

kunle75:


You are very right, na so I meet this chick for Georgia during one of my visit but I live in the Midwest.
The next thing she said immediately she realized I have everything going is ,if I will help her with her paperwork, I just blank out straight.
They want to reap where they didn't sow.

I met one in my first month here.

You need to see the care and love she showered at first. I immediately started dreaming marriage and long term things.

Then the bombshell drops; she came with a visitor’s visa 3 years ago and have overstayed her visa. She doesn’t want to go back and apply for PR the right way. She needs a guy with papers that will marry her and legalize her stay.

Because of the care she already showed, I was willing to do that for her. But she was not able to convince me that her love was not because of her ambition. And other wise counsel prevailed.

Funny thing was if she was legal, she would have had this same character I talked about in my first post.

Hyerin:


Pained over what? It appears you're projecting those feelings onto me. You act like you're doing the hypothetical woman any favors by marrying her but you're not. You have other options of women to choose from but you've decided to limit yourself to Nigerian women, purposely settling because you know you can't get deified by other women. If you do see a Nigerian woman to be with, there's likelihood you'd cheat because your heart isn't in the right place.

And btw, what guy even names himself "jasmine"? Lmfao.

Na illiteracy dey worry you. Sorry o

Hyerin:


Defence is another thing entirely, it's not an indication of this supposedly unconditional love. How many laymen are willing to fight and shed blood for their country? With this logic then politicians, senators, presidents, doctors, lawyers etc and all other professions that deals with people or impact their lives all have unconditional love for people since their line of work affect them in some way. Men getting drafted into war are forced to, there's no altruistic motive on their part. What about interpersonal relationships? Men are the perpetrators of intimate partner violence; domestic physical and sexual assault; familicide; incest etc. Upholders of infidelity and are six times more likely to leave their wives if she gets sick or disabled so were exactly is this unconditional love coming from? Some parents don't even love their own children unconditionally not to even talk of men, the worst of the worst in showing genuine affection. Almost everything men do is primarily motivated by selfishness; he is self-seeking. All the prerequisites and demands in being "wife material" you lot enjoy disturbing the peace with are what? Not conditions abi? You must have constructed your own reality because what you asserted doesn't align with objective facts.

"Argue with the void" is an expression signifying a disinterest in furthering discourse, dimwit.

Simple question, and you called him a dimwit

Shows your mentality and upbringing.

I wonder why you are so pained and bitter by this topic.

Better go get a life outside Nairaland and stop displaying your unruliness.

revolt:

As usual I gave you empirical facts and history to read yet as typical blue pill ediots always do, they argue with emmotions and abuse/ shaming tactics ... NEVER debunking facts or putting up superior points. Lol scientific comm indeed...

You really have time to be typing these long epistles for such an unruly fellow.

Dont give her attention henceforth please

Jasmine17:


Will you agree before?

Your lot are the unruly ones jare.

Una go dey alright last last

you too

revolt:

As usual I gave you empirical facts and history to read yet as typical blue pill ediots always do, they argue with emmotions and abuse/ shaming tactics ... NEVER debunking facts or putting up superior points. Lol scientific comm indeed...

I could literally sit down now and begin to pick apart your entire argument if I really wanted to. Typing out essays doesn't make you right like you badly want it to be. There's alot of misinformation, inaccuracies, concocted bullshit, romanticization of the past, and a complete lack of complexity in your pro male driven narratives. You're not worth the keystrokes because redpillers like yourself are irrationally emotional, obstinate, psychotic rage-filled misogynists with a collective I.Q in negatives. Mentally incapable of attaining rationale. It's like talking to a racist; they're both sides of the same bigotedness.

I have already addressed what was needed to be addressed and that was, refuting your claim that men loved unconditionally. You're the one who wasted your own time in compiling redpill talking points to prove your deficit in certain areas.

Jasmine17:


Simple question, and you called him a dimwit

Shows your mentality and upbringing.

I wonder why you are so pained and bitter by this topic.

Better go get a life outside Nairaland and stop displaying your unruliness.

I understand the need for you to show brotherly solidarity towards your fellow male but in doing so, you too flaunted your dim-wittedness.

I'm not pained nor bitter like you so badly want me to be. Again, easy on the projection. It was never that serious as you can see, my previous replies to you were free of invectives and level-headed. Thus, your claims of me being bitter or pained are unfounded.

Sorry to burst your bubble but I do have a life outside nairaland unlike some male folks on here. Moving on!

Jasmine17:


I met one in my first month here.

You need to see the care and love she showered at first. I immediately started dreaming marriage and long term things.

Then the bombshell drops; she came with a visitor’s visa 3 years ago and have overstayed her visa. She doesn’t want to go back and apply for PR the right way. She needs a guy with papers that will marry her and legalize her stay.

Because of the care she already showed, I was willing to do that for her. But she was not able to convince me that her love was not because of her ambition. And other wise counsel prevailed.

Funny thing was if she was legal, she would have had this same character I talked about in my first post.

Exactly almost all of them,and they get bombed by guys here all the time,because we all knew there love isn't genuine.

Jasmine17:
I want to briefly share my dating experiences with Nigerian ladies in the North American sphere. I have also asked several of my paddies and it seems like a norm amongst our Nigerian sisters.

Once you ask a Nigerian lady out in this space, 9 out of 10 times, the first question you are going to get from her is “when did you arrive here?” Once you are perceived as a newbie, you will automatically be blanked out. Hence most times, you will have to lie in other to continue the conversation.

Unfortunately, most guys who arrive single are normally serious at first, as they feel that one hurdle (relocating) has been solve and the next hurdle after getting a good paying job is of course to settle down with a Nigerian sister.

But this mentality of looking for old comers with the mindset that those are the only ones who are comfortable enough has robbed many of our sisters great opportunities, and continue to push black brothers into the arms of non-judgemental white ladies.

Another funny question you will get is “are you mobile?”
A “No” to this question will automatically earn you a blank.
A such ladies are so shallow minded not to think that there are several reasons why a serious minded guy will not want to buy a car yet in his first years living in the west.

Cars are very cheap unlike in Nigeria. A very good high value toks will cost you far less than what you pay in Nigeria. But there is the issue of insurance, parking space payment, parking tickets, traffic violation tickets, etc. Hence if you buy are car just of ownership sake, you are only getting another human to take care of. And when you compare the transit system and its reliability, you will find it is only sensible to own a car if it is being used to make more money.

Now, why would any right thinking person feel a guy with a car is the key to her happiness if it is not the olosho mentality? Then when they hit 35-40years, they start crying that there is no Nigerian brother available.

I think we should change this mentality in other not to cry foul when black brothers run into the arms of respectful white sisters

Bye for now

I don't think they should change the mentality. It keeps them from procreating and spreading their stupidíty. Let it end with them

Jasmine17:


You have said it all

I normally would not create a topic on this but the last encounter I had made me do this.

Met this girl on an online space. Reached out to her and we got talking. Then I invite her for a date (was going to spend my money on her o) and the next question was “are you mobile?”. I purposely answered no, just to see her reaction. Next thing, she stopped replying till date. I just laughed and moved on.

Last time i was in America. It was my black American lady friend that was driving me around Atlanta.
Truth be told you may be better off looking for a black American lady or Nigerian born and raised in the States.

Jasmine17:


You really have time to be typing these long epistles for such an unruly fellow.

Dont give her attention henceforth please

I gave up on him/ abi sis / her,..... Whatever gender "they identify with "....you know they are gender fluid these days ..

Just like someone stated here, such behaviour by them is due to past experiences and stories, so they are being protective of themselves but being over protective is to their own detriment on the long run, infact it's already happening cos there are many ladies in thier late twenties, thirties , forties lonely, fustrated and single crying for marriage(husbands), partnership etc

My advice to ladies is not to follow the stereotype, rather be open minded while still being careful while dating and vigilant to watch out for redflags cos there are many many genuine newcomers wanting true relationship with them, they chasing or rejecting every Tom and Harry due to the already bad stereotype is to their own detriment. They should know that even in every stereotypes there are always exceptions.

And in the case of the argument about unconditional love in this thread, facts, events and nature have shown that that MEN truly in love, love UNCONDITIONALLY as compared to WOMEN (Am not saying women doesn't love genuinely, some do but the number is very minute ) WOMEN are generally HYPERGAMIC in nature.

@Jasmine. I see your point. I recall when we (myself and 4 of my guys) just arrived Yankee to school (different schools, different regions), our experiences were pretty similar. At that time, none of us had time for girls not to talk of relationship. We were laser focused on the goal. As it happened, the most sincere friendships that we had were with Naija guys and US- born Naija females. Those were the people who took to us and showed genuine interest in helping us navigate the system and integrating with less hassles. The Naija girls that immigrated with their families were in a totally different category- they considered us as JJC’s and honestly were not as friendly or helpful. They always had this air around them but we cared less. Even in the Naija churches, some of them Naija born ladies still have those dynamics in their interactions with us but man no send- there was too much energy invested by us into the dream for there to be any time spared for random issues.
As it turned out- one of my guys eventually married one of the US born naija girls and she has been amazing (they have been married for over 10 years now). She has raised their children with solid decency, risen in her career to an executive position (with 6 figure bonuses, not to talk of base pay/salary o), and she still treats my guy like a King. You need to see the way she respects and treats my guys family members whenever they visit Yankee or my guy goes to Naija with her. My guy has done extremely well for himself too! I think like lost people have stated, character and upbringing is the main thing. As per we the 3 other guys, our story Na for another day- but it was all a happy ending!

NayTayMan:
@Jasmine. I see your point. I recall when we (myself and 4 of my guys) just arrived Yankee to school (different schools, different regions), our experiences were pretty similar. At that time, none of us had time for girls not to talk of relationship. We were laser focused on the goal. As it happened, the most sincere friendships that we had were with Naija guys and US- born Naija females. Those were the people who took to us and showed genuine interest in helping us navigate the system and integrating with less hassles. The Naija girls that immigrated with their families were in a totally different category- they considered us as JJC’s and honestly were not as friendly or helpful. They always had this air around them but we cared less. Even in the Naija churches, some of them Naija born ladies still have those dynamics in their interactions with us but man no send- there was too much energy invested by us into the dream for there to be any time spared for random issues.
As it turned out- one of my guys eventually married one of the US born naija girls and she has been amazing (they have been married for over 10 years now). She has raised their children with solid decency, risen in her career to an executive position (with 6 figure bonuses, not to talk of base pay/salary o), and she still treats my guy like a King. You need to see the way she respects and treats my guys family members whenever they visit Yankee or my guy goes to Naija with her. My guy has done extremely well for himself too! I think like lost people have stated, character and upbringing is the main thing. As per we the 3 other guys, our story Na for another day- but it was all a happy ending!

Wish I could like your post more.

Glad you guys are securing the bags

More grace

depato88:
Just like someone stated here, such behaviour by them is due to past experiences and stories, so they are being protective of themselves but being over protective is to their own detriment on the long run, infact it's already happening cos there are many ladies in thier late twenties, thirties , forties lonely, fustrated and single crying for marriage(husbands), partnership etc

My advice to ladies is not to follow the stereotype, rather be open minded while still being careful while dating and vigilant to watch out for redflags cos there are many many genuine newcomers wanting true relationship with them, they chasing or rejecting every Tom and Harry due to the already bad stereotype is to their own detriment. They should know that even in every stereotypes there are always exceptions.

And in the case of the argument about unconditional love in this thread, facts, events and nature have shown that that MEN truly in love, love UNCONDITIONALLY as compared to WOMEN (Am not saying women doesn't love genuinely, some do but the number is very minute ) WOMEN are generally HYPERGAMIC in nature.

Exactly my point bro

alphaNomega:
I don't think they should change the mentality. It keeps them from procreating and spreading their stupidíty. Let it end with them

Wawuuuu

I feel it’s a learned habit

Hence it can be unlearned

So there's no difference between those ones back home here and the ones abroad nawa o

DrFunmisticGlow:
there's a movement gaining momentum among black women. Very soon a number of black women will stop this blind loyalty to black men.

Lool...I'm going open a thread on you DIEvestors.

Oh, and black women are not loyal that's a lie.

Magnoliaa:
Every day, another story. Another rant. Another heartbreak.

Date women of other races and let us rest.

Next, please.

One uncultured, untrained shit hole over here.

BigDawsNet:


You are right

But here we hav some ladies in Nigerian church that won't think twice to have you as their wife...

They are cute and dey definitely need husband in their life...
I know a guy that just arrived...
He got married in few months...

Anything else apart from churches...you must get a paper, good job and great personality to hang out with a Nigerian ladies here

Forget church matter...nonsense dey they church...all manner of foolish characters full church too...don't take the notion because it is house of God ooooo

1Sharon:


Lool...I'm going open a thread on you DIEvestors.

Oh, and black women are not loyal that's a lie.

please do so