Guy Try and act matured

Maturity is the ability not to lie but not to tell the truth.

So in order to avoid issues and complications, keep quiet were neccessary.

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

those women you see, you don't love them to the extent of stupidity, why will you as a man allow woman to know your financial status? Who thus that? Only simps, even your mother won't be happy spending much cash on your wife, that's how God created those creature. It's you who need to act like a man. If I send money to my mum, my wife will never know, if I'm doing something for my wife, I don't tell my family. Enjoy a happy home, you need to be smart about it. Even if my wife give me fund to do business, I'm still the Man, I'm not under any obligation to give her details of how I spent, all I need is to manage resources well

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

Well since it’s like that, my advise is that You must learn to practice hide and seek game, I believe you should be able to decode that

garriAndsugar:
Don't hide anything important.. but don't disclose everything sha..

So if you buy boxers and singlet you will now go and tell her too??

She's just naturally greedy.. you need to understand your wife and follow her the way she is to avoid getting issues with her..

This ain't greed, I would have said witchcraft but she's his woman and it's not my place to disrespect her

tyup:


Sadly such mistakes happen when we men fail to make our GF or spouse know their place and boundaries. who on Earth is that girl that would question how my money is spent?? if i've paid bride price, I got no business anymore sending that family money. how dare my GF open my fridge without my consent?? or spouse shouting on my junior sis either she's right or wrong??

Lol...Some women do over step boundaries atimes...

Hmmmm, so even as you do send to her mum too she's still frowning when you send to your mum....

Am telling you when ever your mum visits she will want to treat ya mum bad.

Then you will have to hide some things from her like sending cash home and so on.

Na her type they say mother inlaw na winch

Who knows... May be your mother is also reaping what she did many years ago... Life drama .. karma is bitc

JustforMen:
That is also true but we are all imperfect so you don't have to rule out that your wife can do good.
You must cut a slack for all humans because we all have weaknesses not just the women.
She cannot be perpetually evil and all of us can benefit from a second chance with proper guidance.
She is not necessarily wicked but may be the circumstances of her upbringing defines her responses but like i said she is your wife and you came to her life to help make her a better person all round.

She is wicked.

She gives to her own people, but does not want you to give to yours.

She wants the husband family to lack.

That is wickedness. There are no two names to call it.

The option is to ignore her and do what you want to do.

Personally I can't marry any woman with traces of wickedness and selfishness.

officialmario:


The issue is that I always give her money to send to her mum too, she is loyal to me, although she is not working right now, but she still save little that I give her, I can't really say if she has been sending money to her mom secretly.

No wonder they say, name represent one. Your name alone shows how simp u are

TheOnlyUyai:


I don't care what you call yourself.

But, I have to let you know that you are a toxic person. I already pity the woman who is dating you or will date/marry you. Yes, you can be firm and exert authority as a man without coming off as rude, condescending or too strict. I can tell you for free that no woman will stay with you if you put up such an attitude except of course she has low self-esteem.

Funny enough I'm among those guys that condemn beating women in a strong Lang. from experience and past relationship of my guys and mine, I've come to understand Ladies don't respect/rate guys who would give their all to make their woman happy or satisfy her needs

on ur assertion that no woman will stay with me, Lmao I've got like three on my neck and it's just my principles they have to abide to. and over time, each parties have always learn respected themselves. Besides, I'm not as Rude as you feel

There are kind and lovely women out there.

Women with the heart of Angels.

But you say na karashika you want marry because she get big nyansh.

Well, that is the result.

officialmario:


Something about her is that, if I buy a boxer I have to buy her a pant too, just to make it perfect, if I don't buy her own, it's going to be war.

I didn't want to comment, but everything you're saying is irritating me to be honest.

Just pause for a second and read what you wrote above. I don't want to take it personal, cos it's none of my business. But stop behaving like a SIMP.

You are not the first to be married and love their wives. We all do, but don't be a slave.

Ask yourself this question, if your wife was the one working and the equation was turned. Will she send money to your parents or give you upkeep? Without telling the whole world how useless of a husband you are?

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

Don't be a weak man don't be manipulated by her accum you are her husband you are in charge don't let your wife ruin your relationship with your family. Had it mean it her family will she will act the same way...
This how a rich man who has been in the US didn't empowered any of his family members and was able to take everyone of his wife family members out to united states at the end the wife dumb him and chase him out of his house in US now he is back in village and now a laughing stock he doesn't have a say in the village...
Stop telling your wife every thing especially your finances

These days, na mumu dey marry because what kind of thing is this? You want to say you didn't notice this attitude of hers before marrying her? These are the type of women who prefer to marry a man whose mother is late.

They forget they will be mother in law's some days.

You even send her family money.

Wow. No wonder people steal these days. It's not your responsibility to send her parents money.

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

The solution to your problem is this (I've been in your shoes so I know what I'm saying). Develop a habit of having what I would call 'ME' money (that is, money that is your own money that you can freely spend without even your wife knowing about). It can be set aside in a separate bank account that your wife has no access to. It should also be money that is part of your own financial contribution to the family. You can also encourage your wife to also have her own ME money even, for the sake of peace.

You are a man and the head of your household, which ordinarily confers on you certain privileges and right to such privacy. You must first ensure that you meet all your financial obligations to your wife and kids though; after settling all such bills, she should have no business knowing how you choose to spend your ME money. Put your foot down if you must, to assert your right to spending that ME money at your own discretion without her prying eyes. It is from such money you should be sending money to your mom. Problem solved.

some men are simps. hear wetin person dey talk....

How do you think your mum will feel if she knows that your wife is always aware of whatever you send to her?

How will you feel if you ask one of your siblings for money and he tells you he needs to inform his wife firstly?

There is no one size fits all principle here though. Whatever works for each couple. I know couples who send money to their parents without keeping each other in the dark.

Looks like your wife is the type that is best kept in the dark though.

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

Then don't tell her...simple as ABC........no woman can tell me, how to spend my money......she can be sending money to her parents too.......that's her business......

Some men go just dey behave like babies, u sent money to ur mother or ur siblings, u come they tell ur wife, say wetin happen? U must not tell ur wife everything.. forget about those married theories, there are things u keep for urself as man...

If your wife knew that you transferred money to your mum, not only you are a fool and simp, you are a complete idiot. You are not a man at all. We are not talking about your side chick or your sister sef, your mum. OMG, if only I can trace you I will give you a slap that can resurrect a dead man and reset a damaged brain. Anu

Only a foolish man will say "I don't hide anything from my wife"



Women are wired to be jealous, most of them just pretend about it.....No matter how you love your wife don't disclose everything to her to avoid problem. God gave us brains for a reason.

You are married to a bad wife that wants to tear you out of your family to preferably hers. Don't secumb to that rubbish women of nowadays are fund of doing!

Women must understand that a man clinging to his wife doesn't mean he is no longer part of his family. A man married a woman to form a family of his own that is still part of his father's family.

officialmario:


There is no way they will not come with family issues, even when you have paid the bride price, it is still part of responsibility.

What responsibility....that's a wrong and poor mentality.....I can assist voluntarily....but demanding for money....kobo dem no go get.....anyway, my wife knows me....she can't bring that kinda craps on my table......

OKOATA:

Why do you need to send money to her mother? Did you marry a full time wife? Bros you need to use your brain, let her send money to her own mother from her own money, its not you that should do such. You can't be taking care of your greedy wife and mother together, you can do it often not always. As a man don't open up all your finances to your wife but you guys won't listen.

There are times a man is blessed and he decides to be a blessing...To our old people..at least be a relief...it is not a must o, but I am pissed as to why the wife is carrying face.

And if you check na full time house wife with entitlement mentality....God guide us biko..

Before you know it now, na I am not in the mood for bedroom just to frustrate the OP...smh

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

My brother it depends on how you started it, you have to live with it.

You deserve it all ,only simps let their wife know their Capital base.how can your wife even know you sent money to your siblings/parents not to even talk of challenging it. You deserve no pity ..DEATH TO SIMPS

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

Sleekfingers:



What responsibility....that's a wrong and poor mentality.....I can assist voluntarily....but demanding for money....kobo dem no go get.....anyway, my wife knows me....she can't bring that kinda craps on my table......

No be here we read where a family mandated a Son in-law to contribute money for one of their sons to marry..lmao

Nothing we no go see for entitlements.

If your wife is always sad whenever you send money to your family members....it's not her fault bro..it's your fault...cos at a point in time you don downgrade your family for her face...and given her a bad notion or impression about your family....my wife dare not try it with me..even if she is sad...she keeps it to her inner self .....and if reverse is the car bro.... This is a sign that she will soon die if she keeps getting sad you sending money to your family.... Am sure she isn't only sad...she is depressed also ...

officialmario:
Dear Nairalanders

There is this issue that is bothering my mind, I have promise to be faithful to my wife and always let her know whatever comes in for me.
But the problem is that I always tell her how money is spent, and whenever I present list for whatever we buy and all other expenses, but each time she sees anything like I sent 10k to my mother, she always pick up fight with me, and I have not been biased, I send money to her mother too.

I don't know why she is acting like this, and It doesn't make me a happy man at home.
Please I need your advice on what I can do, I don't want to hide anything from my wife.

officialmario:


There is no way they will not come with family issues, even when you have paid the bride price, it is still part of responsibility.

Oga, it is not your responsibility to take care of your mother-in-law. You are just been generous,which is okay. As a man, you should be able to assert your authority in the home. Make your wife know that your mother is still your mother ,hence you are obligated to take care of her, her (your wife) feelings notwithstanding.

KimberlyWest:
Op, talk to your wife. Let her know that your mother put so much effort, resources and time into making you the man you are today. Not forgetting the daily prayers. Same way you care about her is the same way you care about your mother.

Try to find out why she's always sad when you send money to your mother. Does she have silent 'beef' with your mother? Maybe your mother wasn't 100% in support of the marriage or has said something that annoyed her. If she opens up, beg her to forgive and forget. If she doesn't, tell her you also love your mother and cannot abandon her simply because you're married.

Number 2 option: buy her something. When she's in jolly good mood, make the transfer. She 'might' not get angry.

Alternatively, you can hide this from her. Tell her that your salary was slashed by so and so percentage, then remove that percentage every month for your mother. (I don't know how long you'll do this, seeing that she's a wife and not a girlfriend. And you have to be transparent in your marriage . Again, if she's really smart, she will know what's up, which might become a bigger problem.)

Remember, it's your home and your wife and you understand her better.

Also, don't forget that some people who will give you advice today (like the one who's saying a GF cannot open his fridge without his consent) are kids who just finished WAEC and have access to smartphones. Take everything anyone says here with a pinch of salt.

Op never u listen to this advice abeg, I take any God or God's beg u. If u should take this advice, your wife will lord u over and over.