Godoverevery:
After doing alot of research online to see if UNICEF or Government really care about a boy child..... i found out nobody cares.

This a thread to let female folks understand the hate towards them now isn't something that just pop up from nowhere but more psychological which is cause by neglect from society and harsh laws toward men.

There are several millions of campaigns in every part of the world towards fighting for the girl child....infact there are millions of activist fighting everyday for this agenda but no one is talking about the boy child.

We talk about rape,molestation,child marriage etc which are very bad toward the girl child but what about child labour which is actually what most boys up north face everyday.
Does it means mothers don't love there son?? or they feel is right for a boy to be on the street survivaling on his own from tender age of 10??

Are we saying having little boys doing labour in site, boy soldiers in war zone,sleeping on the street, going through molestation in hands of there oga etc is a lesser evil compare to rape,child marriage etc.

Everyone talks about what a girl child pass through in the north but not for one day has anyone spoken about what boys are facing which is much more......a boy of 5yrs in the north is on the street already doing various things to survive infact he can even be taking money to his mother and sisters to feed.....some are taken by boko haram forced into fighting a war.

We all talk about chibok girls but no one has talked about some boys book haram kidnapped years back and force them to join the war...those who were not willing to join were executed instantly.

Am not trying to bring a gender war here am just trying to bring this to people mind...the likes of tonto dike, iyabo ojo etc who have sons should also speak up for the boy child....isn't only the girl child that needs protection.

There are several laws created everyday to protect the female gender all over the world even absurd ones (like Ronaldinho paying 13k £ to a ex gf every month as maintenance fee) which is a Brazilian law and Canada is also trying to pass the same law.....how won't this cause hate??

Even though most of this laws are created by fellow men who i think are just simply foolish but ladies need not to exploit it..

Government of the world need to create laws to protect men/boy as well.

Things need to change else this hate will keep on increasing...government and society need to start advocating the boy child rights too so this feel of ño one cares which is transforming to hate towards female gender will stop.

The same way we are condemning rape of minors and child marriages let condemn child labour, boy soldiers, let condemn why the society feel comfortable with seeing minor boys on the streets.

Let speak up for boy child aswell.

Nice piece, I would have loved if you do not trivialize the fact that boy child get raped too, the worst of it is that they get raped not only by aunties, maid, neigbour etc, they get raped by men too. And this is very common up north, they introduce kids into sodomy through rape.

One wonder why we have rapist and gay in the community, vast majority of them had faced one form of abuse from childhood either from men or women. With no one to hear them out or believe them, they grow to believe its the way of life until they are caught in the act as rape..


7 out of ten men if interviewed will tell you tales of sexual abuse as a boy child. The worst is that average boychild isn't exposed to sexual abuse alone, domestic abuse, child trafficking, hard Labour and terrorism are included. Yet if the complain or want to speak up, they will say you are a man now, why are you acting like a female..

We men need to speak out..

RightToReject:


I wonder what kind of nonsense I will not hear from you small-minded lots on this forum about Igbos. I wonder where you got the statistics that most Igbo families do sentimentally send their daughters to school instead of their sons or deny their sons formal education, and that by extension, saying that men from other tribes are more educated than Igbomen, even when the SSCE and JAMB records and other proven statistical measures locally and internationally said otherwise. The way some of you propagate lies and misinformation because of ignorance, hate in any guise, ethnocentrism, or conceit is both appalling and irritating. I do not care whether you might claim to be an Igboman or not, whichever way, you are definitely not an informed and just one. Stop either using your family as a standard for the bona fide Igbos or stop saying nonsense about what you know nothing about. Distorting facts, misinforming the public, and casting aspersions on others unjustly, regardless of the reason, amount to small-mindedness and insanity in general.

In summary, I have not seen a bona fide Igbo family that does discriminate against their offspring educationally to be particular.

I won't care about any gibberish you might wish to spew, so direct it, if any, to small-minded people like you.

I am Igbo. It took the intervention of relatives and family friends for my father to support my brother's university education. My brother spent three years after his secondary school education learning trade despite having excellent grades in WASSCE.

For me, he was ready to send me abroad to study but couldn't due to some financial difficulties.

You see, my dad believed that a man needs money while a woman needs education in order to attract the right suitors. So his comments are factual.

Today, my brother is gainfully employed and
he is the one carrying the financial burden of family
He still hates my father for that decision.

Olivyabrown:


I am Igbo. It took the intervention of relatives and family friends for my father to support my brother's university education. My brother spent three years after his secondary school education learning trade despite having excellent grades in WASSCE.

For me, he was ready to send me abroad to study but couldn't due to some financial difficulties.

You see, my dad believed that a man needs money while a woman needs education in order to attract the right suitors. So his comments are factual.

Today, my brother is gainfully employed and
he is the one carrying the financial burden of family
He still hates my father for that decision.

Anybody can lay claim of being Igbo, especially on a forum like this, and whether you're Igbo or not, your father/family isn't a standard for the bona fide Igbos.

Datboredberry:
You've never heard the popular statement, "It's a man's world"?

I have heard of it. My question is who propounded it .I hope it was no media speculation.
Anyway, your defence for girls is solid (exception of cruel words) but sometimes you have to type with caution.
Girls as well as boys are victimized. The world is full of wickedness not because of the wicked,but because of people who remain in silence. Comment wisely, comment friendly.

I read the first and the last page and my fear was realized when some of you went ethnic.

This problem raised by Op is beyond gender and ethnicity.

We have abusive communities that abuse both boys and girls. Children period. The selective abuse we see differ from one community to the next making some females or males the subjects of abuse.

Someone complained that girls were educated instead of boys, it is exact opposite in other communities.

Fight for children, it will make us a better society. Terrorists, 419s, drug pushers and abusers were once children coming from individual families.

Datboredberry:


Have you asked yourself how these girls started going to school?

Who fought for their rights?

Or why they didn't have their rights respected in the first place?

This stale narrative is true... There's still a gap.

Nobody fought for anything, even boys were prevented from going to school by ignorant parents at a time,afterward boys were reluctantly allowed to go to school,girls soon followed afterwards, women have been going to school in Africa as early as boys,many not at the same rate but they caught up from the 80s,how come there are so many uneducated men if all men were going to school,different circumstances prevented people from going to school not jus simply because they were male or female

Datboredberry:
Actually, women still aren't faring better...

Domestic violence...
Sexual abuse...
FGM...
Child marriages...
Human trafficking...
They are denied of their right to be educated...

I'm glad you've accepted that men are the reason for this... So dont complain that you have to fix the mess your myopic ancestors created... To promote equality, raise the girl child to the level of the bot child..

Domestic abuse
Forced labour
Molestation
Sexual Abuse
Street begging
No education
Etc

I think the world is against the male gender.

I was raped when I was around 6 to 7 by one aunty
Molested many times
Faced a lot of domestic abuse
Almost escaped being educated

Abeg who I go tell as a man, all they keep saying is these things would make you stronger.

The society is getting what they sow in us, we men it starts with the boy child.

So abeg shove that your opinion up your ass.

Ask other men to tell their stories you would be surprised.

Datboredberry:
Nope... Presently, there are more educated boys than girls in Nigeria.. The law might say otherwise, but most Nigerian parents still believe a girl shouldn't be educated in the university... Statistics proves your wrong... I don't care whether your sisters alone were educated... The general population, boys are more in schools.
Try to read to understand next time... I agree that young boys aren't paid any attention... But it's stupid that you men here are trying to compare what young boys and young girls go through... Why did the men who commented try to make it seem like feminism is a personal attack on boys? Did you preach to them? Young girls all over the world are more likely to be victims than young boys... I'm not trying to shift the focus to women but to educate the imbeciles here that it's perfectly understandable why the world tends to pay utmost attention to women and to let the know that the worse enemy of boys is the system created by men...so they should put the blame where it belongs- with themselves.
And I respect his opinions! They are perfect... And unlike the men here, he didn't try to compare what men go through and what women go through... He was unbiased.
I'm a woman, so you assume I must have kids... I won't... secondly, are you mentally slow? Did I once comment that boys aren't victims of assault? I'm making a point that it's men who made themselves into living gods that can't be hurt... That why no one (men and women) pay attention to these boys who are victims... Men say they are masculine and strong and the superior sex... So young boys can't even come out to tell the world their awful stories... If a man is raped, it's his fellow men who would encourage him to kill the case because it's unmanly to be the victim of sexual abuse... So don't blame women, blame the system men created... They thought it would favour them, but it only boomeranged...

I speak from the grey line...

These are my points...:

Boys can be victims...

Boys are mostly victims of men...

Boys can't complain that they are victims because they fear that they would disappoint the menfolk...

No one takes topics like this seriously because of patriarchy which clearly centers on the principle that men are superior and beneath the position of being victims...

Men created patriarchy...

Patriarchy back fired...

If you want to promote the rights of boys, don't attack feminism that focuses bon female victims... But focus on boys and dismantling this system that's patriarchy...

They we can truly have a conversation...

victim of men, women and society

cornelman:
[color=#006600][/color]


I think you didn't get the picture well. As a child, you don't just walk up to anyone to say you've been molested. People especially girls and women come out now to say it because they are encouraged to report such wickedness and the society is frowning at it.

Aside celebrities, nobody really comes out as far as Nigeria is concerned.
The rape cases we hear about are mostly reported to the police and not the public.
Society have always frowned against rape at least where women are concerned but
that doesn't mean the victims are seen as a kind of hero. There is significant stigma attached
to be known as victim of rape which cause many to leave it to god.

But no such awareness is even created to liberate the boy child. A research shows that one out of six boys had been sexually abused before age 16. The research even claimed that it likely underestimated the number due to audience received. Ask guys around you and get stories. Nobody asked them, not their families nor the society.

Can you point me to one local awareness campaign encouraging girl rape victims to "come out"?
Also, where is the source of your research?

I reiterate again, nobody except immediate family members owes anyone anything.
Is their a normal person who would stop a random woman or upon meeting them first time start asking them about past rape?

Today, It is certain that girls won't talk too if they are aren't encouraged to do so. Molestation of girl child has always been from time past. But today they have a voice supported by both men and women. The same should go for their brothers too.

Girls don't talk at least not in public.
Even few cases that make it out are scrutinized by angry "truthers"
who tell us how they or their friends have been framed before by liars seeking attention.
Do you even outrightly believe stories of rape from women?

The point is every weak irrespective of gender, needs a voice to speak for it, a voice to encourage it to report evil against it, eyes that wouldn't turn the blind side, ears that wouldn't turn the deaf side and mind that wouldn't be insensitive to their unheard and unsaid plights.

The world you are describing doesn't exist yet.
No one is speaking for any particular person safe in very rare cases of public interest.
Most rape victims only "speak" via reporting the culprit and if they are minor, their parents or guardian
doing the reporting.

What have you personally done to solve the problem and did you encourage all those your
guys with stories to come out and tell it?

Finally, why can't anyone make a point without turning it into competition for attention or victimhood contest?

RightToReject:


Anybody can lay claim of being Igbo, especially on a forum like this, and whether you're Igbo or not, your father/family isn't a standard for the bona fide Igbos.

Believe what you want. The dude was right.

You can also be a Kenyan claiming bona-fide Igbo.

In response to the neglect of the make child,some group of childhood friends team up together to form a mentorship organization tagged Man in The Mirror Foundation... Solely dedicated to mentoring the male child to becoming a responsible man in the society. You can check their website www.mitmfoundation.org

You can also check their social media platforms on Facebook, linkedin and Instagram. You can equally register as a mentee on their website as stated earlier

Godoverevery:
After doing alot of research online to see if UNICEF or Government really care about a boy child..... i found out nobody cares.

This a thread to let female folks understand the hate towards them now isn't something that just pop up from nowhere but more psychological which is cause by neglect from society and harsh laws toward men.

There are several millions of campaigns in every part of the world towards fighting for the girl child....infact there are millions of activist fighting everyday for this agenda but no one is talking about the boy child.

We talk about rape,molestation,child marriage etc which are very bad toward the girl child but what about child labour which is actually what most boys up north face everyday.
Does it means mothers don't love there son?? or they feel is right for a boy to be on the street survivaling on his own from tender age of 10??

Are we saying having little boys doing labour in site, boy soldiers in war zone,sleeping on the street, going through molestation in hands of there oga etc is a lesser evil compare to rape,child marriage etc.

Everyone talks about what a girl child pass through in the north but not for one day has anyone spoken about what boys are facing which is much more......a boy of 5yrs in the north is on the street already doing various things to survive infact he can even be taking money to his mother and sisters to feed.....some are taken by boko haram forced into fighting a war.

We all talk about chibok girls but no one has talked about some boys book haram kidnapped years back and force them to join the war...those who were not willing to join were executed instantly.

Am not trying to bring a gender war here am just trying to bring this to people mind...the likes of tonto dike, iyabo ojo etc who have sons should also speak up for the boy child....isn't only the girl child that needs protection.

There are several laws created everyday to protect the female gender all over the world even absurd ones (like Ronaldinho paying 13k £ to a ex gf every month as maintenance fee) which is a Brazilian law and Canada is also trying to pass the same law.....how won't this cause hate??

Even though most of this laws are created by fellow men who i think are just simply foolish but ladies need not to exploit it..

Government of the world need to create laws to protect men/boy as well.

Things need to change else this hate will keep on increasing...government and society need to start advocating the boy child rights too so this feel of ño one cares which is transforming to hate towards female gender will stop.

The same way we are condemning rape of minors and child marriages let condemn child labour, boy soldiers, let condemn why the society feel comfortable with seeing minor boys on the streets.

Let speak up for boy child aswell.

This post is in my personal TOP TEN Nairaland topics of 2021

Datboredberry:
Exactly! The worse is that none of these men complaining here would dedicate a fraction of a second to advocate for the rights of boys... But they would create a hundred threads attacking women who are eorking hard to fight for young girls... It's simply their malice for women rather than love for their fellow men...

Just look at the rubbish blackmail the OP of this thread is using to pass his message across. Telling women that they should advocate the right of males if not they will continue being bitter towards women.
Did we create the anti woman laws that made life difficult for men in the first place? Are females the ones ruling Nigeria and putting policies in place that make life for them ?
These clowns will always find ways to blame women for everything.

CHoccolaTE:


Just look at the rubbish blackmail the OP of this thread is using to pass his message across. [b]Telling women that they should advocate the right of males [/b]if not they will continue being bitter towards women.
Did we create the anti woman laws that made life difficult for men in the first place? Are females the ones ruling Nigeria and putting policies in place that make life for them ?
These clowns will always find ways to blame women for everything.

These grown ass men expect women to not only fight for our rights, but for their rights as well...

They created a system that's not always favourable, they can't deal with the consequences... Tell a man to accept equality, and his ego would stop him from doing so... Yet, they complain that the world conspires against them...

Majority of those in political offices... Those with influence in the society... Are mostly men so I wonder how they are unfortunate victims when they can clearly sway things to their favour...and they even do!

These men here would stand under the sun or under the rain to protest against young boys being trafficked and used as manual labourer... because the perpetrators of human trafficking are most men! So they refuse to fight themselves... And also, they are extremely lazy malicious beings who would rather hate in women actively fighting for girls than for them to get up and be useful...

Unless it's to be internet fraudsters... Or scam white women with false promises of love... These are the only thing the consider worth doing...

I'm not going to devote my all, fighting for boys...or feel guilty that I prioritise the rights of young girls... I expect men to do the former...it's their obligation as fathers and uncles to educate these children and be decent role models... If they don't care, I won't carry the burden of changing the world alone...

Datboredberry:
These grown ass men expect women to not only fight for our rights, but for their rights as well...

They created a system that's not always favourable, they can't deal with the consequences... Tell a man to accept equality, and his ego would stop him from doing so... Yet, they complain that the world conspires against them...

Majority of those in political offices... Those with influence in the society... Are mostly men so I wonder how they are unfortunate victims when they can clearly sway things to their favour...and they even do!

These men here would stand under the sun or under the rain to protest against young boys being trafficked and used as manual labourer... because the perpetrators of human trafficking are most men! So they refuse to fight themselves... And also, they are extremely lazy malicious beings who would rather hate in women actively fighting for girls than for them to get up and be useful...

Unless it's to be internet fraudsters... Or scam white women with false promises of love... These are the only thing the consider worth doing...

I'm not going to devote my all, fighting for boys

...or feel guilty that I prioritise the rights of young girls... I expect men to do the former...it's their obligation as fathers and uncles to educate these children and be decent role models... If they don't care, I won't carry the burden of changing the world alone...

These men have serious mental problems
They want to be superior leaders but want women to fight for them

@bold, you sef your own is even good. You don't want to devote ALL your fighting for boys. Me I will not devote one single fight for them. If OP and his fellow gay misogynists like they can continue hating women.

E no concern me.

CHoccolaTE:


These men have serious mental problems
They want to be superior leaders but want women to fight for them

@bold, you sef your own is even good. You don't want to devote ALL your fighting for boys. Me I will not devote one single fight for them. If OP and his fellow gay misogynists like they can continue hating women.

E no concern me.

And there's absolutely nothing wrong... They fight for women is exhausting, and most women have even lost their lives...

Men should fight for boys... They can't be liabilities, doing nothing to change the society positively...

But I doubt they ever would... Unless it's an argument against feminism... These men don't care sh** for social justice...

Datboredberry:


The reason there's more emphasis on girl child education is because of the fact that girls around the world were not educated but expected to be wives and mothers...

These campaigns have successfully balanced the equation... Do you even realise that in Nigeria, more boys than girls are educated? Do you even bloody care?

Before you complain, go criticize the men who made it a law that girls aren't intelligent enough or worthy to go to school...

That's why we are where we are... Patriarchy back fires!

Essentially, it's payback classic for you.
That's the problem I have with you people.
You abhor patriarchy and want it abolished for obvious reasons, however, you are so obsessed about replacing it with matriarchy.

Look at the laws, do you bloody care that a man risks potential jail term for not paying his 'girlfriend' some ridiculous maintenance fee?
Or a wife threatening her husband with the police for the slightest reason, or evicting him from his house because of little arguments?

Datboredberry:
These grown ass men expect women to not only fight for our rights, but for their rights as well...

They created a system that's not always favourable, they can't deal with the consequences... Tell a man to accept equality, and his ego would stop him from doing so... Yet, they complain that the world conspires against them...

Majority of those in political offices... Those with influence in the society... Are mostly men so I wonder how they are unfortunate victims when they can clearly sway things to their favour...and they even do!

These men here would stand under the sun or under the rain to protest against young boys being trafficked and used as manual labourer... because the perpetrators of human trafficking are most men! So they refuse to fight themselves... And also, they are extremely lazy malicious beings who would rather hate in women actively fighting for girls than for them to get up and be useful...

Unless it's to be internet fraudsters... Or scam white women with false promises of love... These are the only thing the consider worth doing...

I'm not going to devote my all, fighting for boys...or feel guilty that I prioritise the rights of young girls... I expect men to do the former...it's their obligation as fathers and uncles to educate these children and be decent role models... If they don't care, I won't carry the burden of changing the world alone...

The OP is only pointing out your hypocrisy.
Crying foul only when the girl child is involved and keeping mum when it's boys.
Movements for the boy child rights and protection is always seen as a rival movement by your likes. Worse still, it's seen as a movement to downplay or undermine the girl child campaign. Pathetic!

Invitationn:

The OP is only pointing out your hypocrisy.
Crying foul only when the girl child is involved and keeping mum when it's boys.
Movements for the boy child rights and protection is always seen as a rival movement by your likes. Worse still, it's seen as a movement to downplay or undermine the girl child campaign. Pathetic!

Are you stupid? I'm making a point that men don't campaign for the rights of young boys yet they criticize feminists for not doing so... When these women are greatly busy fighting for young girls...

I organised a seminar with an international organisation to create awareness on child labour... For boys and girls... I'm eighteen...

What have you done?

What positive step have you taken?

Invitationn:

Essentially, it's payback classic for you.
That's the problem I have with you people.
You abhor patriarchy and want it abolished for obvious reasons, however, you are so obsessed about replacing it with matriarchy.

Look at the laws, do you bloody care that a man risks potential jail term for not paying his 'girlfriend' some ridiculous maintenance fee?
Or a wife threatening her husband with the police for the slightest reason, or evicting him from his house because of little arguments?

These issues you highlighted... Compare them to

Domestic abuse...

Sexual molestation...

Trafficking...

Child marriages...

Female genitalịa mutilation...

Unequal wages...

Etc...

You hate matriarchy so much.. I don't support it, it's not even possible.. but do you realise that patriarchy had been here for since the beginning? The way matriarchy repulses you, patriarchy makes us women sick...

You can't even bear to think of a fictional society that favours women...yet your content with this reality that's puts us down and favours you...

Bloody hypocrite...

Datboredberry:
90% of male rape was perpetuated by women? You had me laughing so hard then..

Fact, one in three women have been raped... While one in five boys have been raped...

And let's assume, that half the number of those who sexually abused these boys were female (which it isn't)... Doesn't that still make men the usual villians?

Most boys raped were SODOMIZED... I don't think women have pẹnises...

And if all the men you know were raped, that's awful... But I'm a victim of sexual abuse... And most women too... I'm talking about penetration... Being forced, held down and raped...

Accepting that women are mostly the victims of sexual abuse doesn't discredit the fact that boys are raped also... But don't try to downplay what young girls go through just to push some sick narrative... It's insulting and extremely wicked...

I don't have time for people that should rather be left in yaba left, youu should find your uniform and do the needful.

Boogyman557:
Holly Gram real matters. WTF MAN

can you just stop commenting this on every post
it an eye sore and really annoying

Pataricatering:
men are the cause of majority of problems women face- when women are denied rights to education jobs , property , inheritance , sexual agency ,etc who do you think is behind all those laws ?
Which men does society ignore ? Every political body that makes laws is filled with men - and they make laws that favour themselves .
How many women do banks give loans to ? How many women do investors give loans to ?

I wish I could see you and really explain to you how these things work to you.

No, women in Nigeria are not denied rights to jobs, education, sexual agency property etc. I live in the real world, and here, women have access to those things you mentioned. I'm a woman and never being denied access to any of those things you mentioned.

True, men occupy most political post, but again, men occupy most shitty jobs as well. It is unreasonable to point the juicy positions without pointing the non juicy ones.

ivolt:

Can you list the unique challenges faced by your son?

When my kids were in school, more attention were giving to the girls and of course, severe punishment compared to the girls.

Assumed to be the aggressor if they are were the only boys in the vicinity. Even if they are innocent, the burden of proving themselves innocence lies on them, while the girls were assumed to be innocent by default.

They (boys) were mostly treated like defective girls, and physical games boys engage in like rough and tumble, or any kind of boys games that are competitive in nature is frowned upon, and the more docile and agreeable the boys are, the more normal and well-behaved they were assumes to be.

Also, its tough on them when it's only female that are mostly their teacher right from kindergarten to high school. The lack of constant presence of men to look up to is missing. There are many more, but this I can remember.

Datboredberry:
These issues you highlighted... Compare them to

Domestic abuse...

Sexual molestation...

Trafficking...

Child marriages...

Female genitalịa mutilation...

Unequal wages...

Etc...

You hate matriarchy so much.. I don't support it, it's not even possible.. but do you realise that patriarchy had been here for since the beginning? The way matriarchy repulses you, patriarchy makes us women sick...

You can't even bear to think of a fictional society that favours women...yet your content with this reality that's puts us down and favours you...

Bloody hypocrite...

How predictable ;
Have a good night

Emperor88:


I was sexually molested by 3 different adult females btw the age 9 to 15....But No one cares because I was a boy.

Swear say you no enjoy am

Pataricatering:
men are the cause of majority of problems women face- when women are denied rights to education jobs , property , inheritance , sexual agency ,etc who do you think is behind all those laws ?
Which men does society ignore ? Every political body that makes laws is filled with men - and they make laws that favour themselves.
How many women do banks give loans to ? How many women do investors give loans to ?

I wish I could see you and really explain to you how these things work to you.

The question should be how many women apply for these so called loans?

The average bank today is more likely to give loan to a female entrepreneur than a male counterpart (because they know from research that women are less likely to default). That's the reality everywhere but unfortunately, not many women show interest.

If you visit the average LAPO (or any other microfinance institution), you're more likely to see older female traders taking advantage of these outfits. Women have never been disadvantaged when it comes to access to finance in the 21st century.

More often than not, these institutions and government agencies even come out to announce special offers and grants for women yet many of you (especially the younger generation of women) do not show interest. Note, men do not get such (special) offers.

Compare the population of women contributing to investment/business/politics sections to men. Did Seun also prevent the female gender from contributing to certain sections?

The opportunity is there. Interest is the problem and that's not the fault of anybody.

Tomek09:

Swear say you no enjoy am

I did same way a lot of this underage girls do but we still term it rape. Psychologically it affected me greatly thereafter.