emkz:
Don't react.

What they want is for you to react. When you don't react and they know you know, they'd feel guilty, and that guilt would eat them.

I once had a colleague who spoke ill of me on the phone to someone else. I did not react. She sent me an email trying to guilt-trip me. I still did not react. I only stopped being close to her. She started feeling bad and was trying to make amends. But it was late.

I have also had one church woman accuse me of asking out two girls in the church (people I hadn't spoken to sef). A friend asked me to confront her, I didn't feel the need, and just continued to maintain my quiet demeanour. She can't even look me in the face anymore. A former boss also said nasty things about me to someone else in my face. I did not react when he expected me to, but one day I had enough and I said the most nasty things to him he'd never forget and left his unit. He became afraid because he didn't know I was bidding my time. I don't regret it, but my inner peace cannot be sacrificed for insecure people.

Very good. The key is not reacting when they expect you to and not giving them the expected reaction when you do react.

Maester88:

Am interested bros..

phemmyfour:
Who cares.... sometimes I do talk about myself to myself and still doesn't change my next line of action

Right

That’s normal this days,just live your life.

The discussion is good, though I still see all these kind of post on nairaland having pictures/graphics etc attached to it just to prove a point as mostly fiction.

Xilsbridalhouse:
Lol yes

When I was serving in Oyo state, I went to fetch water opposite our lodge that day. While waiting for my turn, these two ladies started to converse in Yoruba language, insulting me and rubbishing the nice hair do I had on, they said so much you’d think we have actually quarreled in the past.
I don’t really look Yoruba(mixed) so it was easy for them to assume I am Igbo considering the fact that Igbos are mostly posted to that town.
I didn’t reply, I just smiled then immediately I saw one of my friends passing by, I called and greeted the friend in Yoruba language, also had a brief communication with the friend speaking Yoruba...the other two ladies wanted to enter the ground! The shock on their faces was just too obvious and everywhere became quiet

LOL. This is what I like... Handled maturely.

Kriss216:
Women and Gossip


Nothing about this gender is worth emulating.


Tueh!

You need help and that really quick. People gossip regardless of age, gender, status... Stop trying to sound woke by bringing down women because it's disgusting.

Yes ...when I was in school...back then in oou... In oru town precisely. I had a close pally who I took like a brother. We cook and eat together... There a night I was going for night browsing ... Immediately I left the house...I branched the second compound to check a friend... Na that time legend of the seeker series just came out. Decides to burst the night browsing cos of the movie cos they just started watching it..... But my neighbours thought i have left for the cafe
Na so for around 1am for midnight I comot for my guy room go urinate for fence for backyard and my nigga room window day directly opposite the fence I day piss.... Na so I day hear him clearly with a girl in my compound gossiping about me .. na so I wait patiently call my other nigga... We heard all the bad mouth... Omo I day shake like ugwu leaf ..

Me no get chill pill... Na that midnight I burst them ooo... Me and my nigga fight like male dog way day fight for right to mate... After I was done with him. Na so I face the girl... Use bottle tear her new door net way she just did in less than 4 days, took her stove fling it for the bush way day opposite the house...

E later come beg me Sha ,but since that day I give am space. .we are cool as friends ...but i no loose guard for am again ...

Opeyemiextra:
So, I have this neighbor who sells some stuff but for some reasons, I wasn't comfortable buying from her. I buy from the market. This really got her angry and I didn't even know this until recently when she would mention it.

To what really happened, I was home one day and she probably assumed I wasn't. She started saying very terrible things about me to another neighbor that it scared me that another human being would really do that. I was very angry while I was inside my room deciding what exactly to do. I thought of confronting but I decided against it. Eventually I went out, greeted both of them and she was shocked that I was at home. I could see guilt written all over her even days after.

Have you walked in on people or heard by chance people talking ill and evil about you? How did you handle it?

You don search this question on wikihow already, why do you have to come here again?

Opeyemiextra:

Thank you. I hate exchanging words with people, knowing it could degenerate into a fight or worse.

This your action will put them in a very uncomfortable situation, they'll keep second guessing themselves around you.

People already in the pit should not be given the power to pull you down to their abode.

Every one has people who talk I'll of them from within and from outside,even the pope.And the person dt talks I'll of you also has people who talk ill of her.
Ignore but respond if the person talks it to your face by using a wise word to reset his/her brain.

KiNg0G:
you went out and greeted them?

and came back inside your house? jubilating because you thought you saw mere guilt in her face

what were you trying to prove?.... you seem like those ajebutters kinda breed.

make i tell you how mama okemute go handle am for area here.

She go carry chair come outside, then she go tell them to continue.
because she too still get her own to talk.


full area go scatter

na Dc go settle the matter... make hu na stop to dey act like ajebo.
na 9ja we dey o....if you do smei smei for your present them go use you play ball.

Well , I don't know how to do that and I don't want to. I just understand that there are those who you should never, no matter what, come down to their level. Once it's can't be discussed and resolved peacefully, I'm out.

illicit:


Yes

The point is not to fight them but make them understand that you are disappointed

I once caught my neighbor telling my girlfriend bad things about me
I joined them, I made her understand right there that I heard everything and disappointed because I won't do such to her

I joined their conversation but I changed topics

She started crying in the middle of the conversation and we started begging her to stop

LOL.

Anyways, on certain cases a confrontation expressing your disappointment is permissible. But I doubt that the scenario the OP painted is one of such. Those are small minded neighbors.

I mean, if the seller had any sense, she could have politely reminded her neighbour that she has all the goods she needs and will be saving her the stress of going to the market rather than express her grievance in hate-filled, petty gossip.

I'm pretty sure @ opeyemiextra got this hate vibe from the seller, hence her being careful to patronise her before she revealed her true self

Kriss216:
Women and Gossip


Nothing about this gender is worth emulating.


Tue!

If a woman doesn't like you, she will talk bad about you to whoever cares to listen. I had a first-hand experience with two ladies in my workplace. This babe just they run the other girl down.

Brothers and sisters, always listen to both sides of the stories before concluding.

Opeyemiextra:


Well , I don't know how to do that and I don't want to. I just understand that there are those who you should never, no matter what, come down to their level. Once it's can't be discussed and resolved peacefully, I'm out.

Carryon babe. You're doing well.

Shows you don't belong in such neighborhood, you go soon relocate to a neighborhood of like minded people

freddie009:


If a woman doesn't like you, she talks bad about you to whoever cares you hear. I had a first-hand experience with two ladies in my workplace. This babe just they run the other girl down.

Brothers and sisters, always listen to both sides of the stories before concluding.

Please leave Kriss216, he's on a cruise.

HRSweetness:


Carryon babe. You're doing well.

Shows you don't belong in such neighborhood, you go soon relocate to a neighborhood of like minded people

I'm actually moving already.

Opeyemiextra:
So, I have this neighbor who sells some stuff but for some reasons, I wasn't comfortable buying from her. I buy from the market. This really got her angry and I didn't even know this until recently when she would mention it.

To what really happened, I was home one day and she probably assumed I wasn't. She started saying very terrible things about me to another neighbor that it scared me that another human being would really do that. I was very angry while I was inside my room deciding what exactly to do. I thought of confronting but I decided against it. Eventually I went out, greeted both of them and she was shocked that I was at home. I could see guilt written all over her even days after.

Have you walked in on people or heard by chance people talking ill and evil about you? How did you handle it?

Well, you may need to add some context to this. Was this neighbor planning to do something terrible to you or just generally sharing their opinions about you? For me, if it she was just sharing her views, she is definitely entitled to it. It wouldn’t bother me if such views are incorrect. I could also take it as constructive criticism if it comes across as such.

Like it is said, “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” I’d definitely be curious to learn more from such an individual on their perspective about me in certain instances.

geezville86:


Well, you may need to add some context to this. Was this neighbor planning to do something terrible to you or just generally sharing their opinions about you? For me, if it she was just sharing her views, she is definitely entitled to it. It wouldn’t bother me if such views are incorrect. I could also take it as constructive criticism if it comes across as such.

Like it is said, “out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks” I’d definitely be curious to learn more from such an individual on their perspective about me in certain instances.

I will pass on this one. When someone say terrible things about you because they are bitter or whatever, trying to recruit others to their camp, there's absolutely nothing you learn from such a person. Whatever I cannot say to your face, why say it at all?

Kriss216:
Women and Gossip


Nothing about this gender is worth emulating.


Tueh!

Guy 4get!
Some guys are worse off when it comes to speaking ill of others.

I have a neighbor that's his specialty.
This guy is not less than 50years of age.

Xilsbridalhouse:
Lol yes

When I was serving in Oyo state, I went to fetch water opposite our lodge that day. While waiting for my turn, these two ladies started to converse in Yoruba language, insulting me and rubbishing the nice hair do I had on, they said so much you’d think we have actually quarreled in the past.
I don’t really look Yoruba(mixed) so it was easy for them to assume I am Igbo considering the fact that Igbos are mostly posted to that town.
I didn’t reply, I just smiled then immediately I saw one of my friends passing by, I called and greeted the friend in Yoruba language, also had a brief communication with the friend speaking Yoruba...the other two ladies wanted to enter the ground! The shock on their faces was just too obvious and everywhere became quiet

ol boy!

Opeyemiextra:
So, I have this neighbor who sells some stuff but for some reasons, I wasn't comfortable buying from her. I buy from the market. This really got her angry and I didn't even know this until recently when she would mention it.

To what really happened, I was home one day and she probably assumed I wasn't. She started saying very terrible things about me to another neighbor that it scared me that another human being would really do that. I was very angry while I was inside my room deciding what exactly to do. I thought of confronting but I decided against it. Eventually I went out, greeted both of them and she was shocked that I was at home. I could see guilt written all over her even days after.

Have you walked in on people or heard by chance people talking ill and evil about you? How did you handle it?

I don't tolerate such, I will just break bottle on his or her head

Am very sure one of the things she said about you was that you are proud, I have a neighbor like that too, I need you to understand the best way to handle such folks is to maintain your distance, don't even think about, don't give them space in your mind is not worth it, they are not important, you thought is because you are not buying from her that is why she is hating but that is not true, she is jealous because you are better and everyone know, she is trying to pull you down with words behave like she doesn't exist, for me that is the key and God will keep exalting you.

Opeyemiextra:
So, I have this neighbor who sells some stuff but for some reasons, I wasn't comfortable buying from her. I buy from the market. This really got her angry and I didn't even know this until recently when she would mention it.

To what really happened, I was home one day and she probably assumed I wasn't. She started saying very terrible things about me to another neighbor that it scared me that another human being would really do that. I was very angry while I was inside my room deciding what exactly to do. I thought of confronting but I decided against it. Eventually I went out, greeted both of them and she was shocked that I was at home. I could see guilt written all over her even days after.

Have you walked in on people or heard by chance people talking ill and evil about you? How did you handle it?

I don't have that kind of energy in me. I walk away from meaningless and avoidable battles.

Freerhyme1:
I don't tolerate such, I will just break bottle on his or her head

Opeyemiextra:
So, I have this neighbor who sells some stuff but for some reasons, I wasn't comfortable buying from her. I buy from the market. This really got her angry and I didn't even know this until recently when she would mention it.

To what really happened, I was home one day and she probably assumed I wasn't. She started saying very terrible things about me to another neighbor that it scared me that another human being would really do that. I was very angry while I was inside my room deciding what exactly to do. I thought of confronting but I decided against it. Eventually I went out, greeted both of them and she was shocked that I was at home. I could see guilt written all over her even days after.

Have you walked in on people or heard by chance people talking ill and evil about you? How did you handle it?

Hmmm

Opeyemiextra:
So, I have this neighbor who sells some stuff but for some reasons, I wasn't comfortable buying from her. I buy from the market. This really got her angry and I didn't even know this until recently when she would mention it.

To what really happened, I was home one day and she probably assumed I wasn't. She started saying very terrible things about me to another neighbor that it scared me that another human being would really do that. I was very angry while I was inside my room deciding what exactly to do. I thought of confronting but I decided against it. Eventually I went out, greeted both of them and she was shocked that I was at home. I could see guilt written all over her even days after.

Have you walked in on people or heard by chance people talking ill and evil about you? How did you handle it?

live your life the way u want, u can't please anybody..where I sell my neighbors will sit and start talking about me, I don't care o. in as much non of them is feeding you to hell with what they think..my mom will say (look what people are saying) I told her everyone is entitled to what they think or say.whatever they think or say is their headache not mine..op u can't overcome it cos u can't please anybody but u can please yourself by doing what is best for you.

Opeyemiextra:


I'm actually moving already.

I hope you prayerfully chose this new neighborhood.

Wishing you the best.

Face my front.

Kriss216:
Women and Gossip


Nothing about this gender is worth emulating.


Tueh!

That gender!

Opeyemiextra:


I will pass on this one. When someone say terrible things about you because they are bitter or whatever, trying to recruit others to their camp, there's absolutely nothing you learn from such a person. Whatever I cannot say to your face, why say it at all?

Well, there you go! Now you are giving this some context...my initial comment was generic and based on your original post. If you think the lady’s utterance was coming from a bitter place, there’s a high chance her views are skewed and incorrect. Again, in that case, it would not bother me one bit as mentioned earlier.

Kriss216:
Women and Gossip


Nothing about this gender is worth emulating.


Tueh!

Lool haha