I would really appreciate matured responses.

I believe personal growth is intentional and when there's no effort, there's little or no improvement.
How do you deal with a partner who's less interested in taking practical steps to grow? (Steps like reading books on personal growth, listening to podcasts, and attending church)

Tell your partner you truly love and care about him/her and also talk about the benefits of improving.

Let him/her see the benefits to him/herself to you as thier partner and also to your family too.

If your partner truly loves you, they'll definitely oblige.
Just show patience and not just trying to shove it down thier throat by all means and even picking on little mistakes in a derogatory manner.

Appreciate the spouse about what he or she does well. Be a good example too

We all know change is hard and takes a lot of consciousness. Dont be an hypocrite(most of us do) and make it seem as if they are deliberately lackadaisical about it.

Change is hard and takes time, you also need to understand this.

Above all Patience, Prayer and perseverance is key.

And I say Prayer again, nothing too small to pray about

You really can't change people except they wanna change willingly. It gotta come from the heart. You can only advise and suggest to them things that can help them. Most ain't gonna listen.

Don't stress yourself too much. If it were to be me, I'd get tired of such partner easily because I ain't laid back.

You accepted them earlier the way they are, why should it be an issue now?

slimjohn2k5:
You accepted them earlier the way they are, why should it be an issue now?

You can't discover this kind of thing immediately, it takes you spending time with the person in question.

Holly Gram


As I de HERE so..



I no get RELATIONSHIP..


Na WEED be my RELATIONSHIP..



for the growth matterz..


maybe Na to INCREASE d Level of my WEED SMOKING..



MEAN WHILE..



I de ASHAWOO house NOW... I just de one CONNER de use EYES find better ASHAWOO BANI with standard BOBZ to NACK...



WTF MAN

first...find out his area of interest... reading books might not be his thing... people develop in different ways...it might be even from having a conversation with people that read all the books and listen to all the podcast...some people are very bad readers but very good listeners...just tell them everything you've read about and they will use it more than u...some people sleep off when listening to podcasts but can listen when you gist with them concerning issues... EVERYONE MUST NO BE A READER.. find out his interest,you can't change anyone except they want to

missimelda01:
I would really appreciate matured responses.

I believe personal growth is intentional and when there's no effort, there's little or no improvement.
How do you deal with a partner who's less interested in taking practical steps to grow? (Steps like reading books on personal growth, listening to podcasts, and attending church)

Let the person start seeing the positive effects on your own life....and unless they're cursed with a poverty mentality, THEY'LL START GROWING INTEREST IN THEIR OWN GROWTH TOO.....so as to remain relevant in your life.

Ladies who try to change men end up hurting themselves.

This thing is not by force. Be patient and love them and especially pray. You are not God who changes hearts.

rickpat:
first...find out his area of interest... reading books might not be his thing... people develop in different ways...it might be even from having a conversation with people that read all the books and listen to all the podcast...some people are very bad readers but very good listeners...just tell them everything you've read about and they will use it more than u...some people sleep off when listening to podcasts but can listen when you gist with them concerning issues... EVERYONE MUST NO BE A READER.. find out his interest,you can't change anyone except they want to

"reading books" was just an example....I don't think OP limited the definition of "personal growth" to reading of books.

OP has obviously known this trend from their conversations about future prospects and ambitions and may have seen that he mostly has wishes and hopes instead of a well mapped out plan or strategy to achieving them - such things as upskilling or upgrading one's self to meet with the requirements of where they hope to be in future.

Stephen0mozzy:


"reading books" was just an example....I don't think OP limited his definition of "personal growth" to reading of books.

OP has obviously known this trend from their conversations about future prospects and ambitions and may have seen that she mostly has wishes and hopes instead of a well mapped out plan or strategy to achieving them - such things as upskilling or upgrading one's self to meet with the requirements of where they hope to be in future.

okay. . thanks

missimelda01:
I would really appreciate matured responses.

I believe personal growth is intentional and when there's no effort, there's little or no improvement.
How do you deal with a partner who's less interested in taking practical steps to grow? (Steps like reading books on personal growth, listening to podcasts, and attending church)

If personal growth if of importance to you, why engage or associate with someone who has no interest whatsoever in the first place?

Why not seek out those who share commonalities in areas of importance to you rather than settling for those who don't?,

How do you deal with such partners? Well, you simply accept you are both not compatible in that area and move on to focusing your attention on those areas in which you are. Or you abandon that partner entirely to find yourself peace of mind with someone else more agreeable with your taste.

Kobojunkie:
If personal growth if of importance to you, why engage or associate with someone who has no interest whatsoever in the first place?

Why not seek out those who share commonalities in areas of importance to you rather than settling for those who don't?,

How do you deal with such partners? Well, you simply accept you are both not compatible in that area and move on to focusing your attention on those areas in which you are. Or you abandon that partner entirely to find yourself peace of mind with someone else more agreeable with your taste.

There are other things I find interesting about this person, plus at the beginning it was as if he would do anything for us to be together. Is personal growth such a hard thing? I thought it was something anyone would be interested in.

The thought of moving on is so heartbreaking but that seems to be the only option now

Stephen0mozzy:


Let the person start seeing the positive effects on your own life....and unless they're cursed with a poverty mentality, THEY'LL START GROWING INTEREST IN THEIR OWN GROWTH TOO.....so as to remain relevant in your life.

This doesn't work everytime, I think I'm doing my best.

missimelda01:

There are other things I find interesting about this person, plus at the beginning it was as if he would do anything for us to be together. Is personal growth such a hard thing? I thought it was something anyone would be interested in.

The thought of moving on is so heartbreaking but that seems to be the only option now

Some people are very comfortable with the easy life. They don’t want to be an Okonjo or an Elumelu. They just want to take each day at a time. Spend time with their loved ones and eat peppered kpomo.

I am afraid it is a personality type. Not always something you can change.

missimelda01:

There are other things I find interesting about this person, plus at the beginning it was as if he would do anything for us to be together. Is personal growth such a hard thing? I thought it was something anyone would be interested in.

The thought of moving on is so heartbreaking but that seems to be the only option now

I once lived in Dover, Delaware, a town about 2-hr drive from New York, several years ago. And while there, I met some very interesting people. There was this particular man whose story puzzled me the most, a 69-yr old man, at the time, born and raised in Delaware. He had heard of New York, and loved the idea of the city, but not once in his 69 years did he ever venture out to exploring the city, even on his own. I asked him why and he had no real answers to give as to why he had never been.

Personal growth is a choice, and just as there are those out there who consider it the Holy grail as far as life is concerned, there are those who consider it of little to no worth.

A relationship is an agreement between partners - a negotiation, and so if you go in thinking you will change your partner, you have failed as it is no longer a relationship but a takeover attempt, and that rarely works out to be a healthy relationship to have.

I was once asked where I see myself in the next five years because I am asking a girl out then marry her.

pocohantas:


Some people are very comfortable with the easy life. They don’t want to be an Okonjo or an Elumelu. They just want to take each day at a time. Spend time with their loved ones and eat peppered kpomo.

I am afraid it is a personality type. Not always something you can change.

But it's important for everyday living, learning how to manage people, emotions and the rest. It's really sad that some people don't see the need to improve in these areas.

Kobojunkie:
I once lived in Dover, Delaware, a town about 2-hr drive from New York, several years ago. And while there, I met some very interesting people. There was this particular man whose story puzzled me the most, a 69-yr old man, at the time, born and raised in Delaware. He had heard of New York, and loved the idea of the city, but not once in his 69 years did he ever venture out to exploring the city, even on his own. I asked him why and he had no real answers to give as to why he had never been.

Personal growth is a choice, and just as there are those out there who consider it the Holy grail as far as life is concerned, there are those who consider it of little to no worth.

A relationship is an agreement between partners - a negotiation, and so if you go in thinking you will change your partner, you have failed as it is no longer a relationship but a takeover attempt, and that rarely works out to be a healthy relationship to have.

I didn't really go in thinking I could change him. I thought to myself that I also have imperfections so we both needed to improve, what I didn't consider was if growth was something he was willing to work for.

missimelda01:

But it's important for everyday living, learning how to manage people, emotions and the rest. It's really sad that some people don't see the need to improve in these areas.

But is he having a problem managing you and people?

If you keep pushing it, you would start giving off mummy vibes and he would begin to resent you. That is if you don’t resent him first.

missimelda01:

I didn't really go in thinking I could change him. I thought to myself that I also have imperfections so we both needed to improve, what I didn't consider was if growth was something he was willing to work for.

Or you simply didn't understand how important it was to you in a relationship?

Now you realize it is, so what are you going to do about it? Attempt to change him? Accept him as is? Or choose to learn from the experience in hopes you will make better choice when choosing a partner next time?,

missimelda01:

This doesn't work everytime, I think I'm doing my best.

I'm sure he's in a better position to allay your fears... This time talk to him straight about the situation.. Not beating around the bush.. Tell him in clear terms about his plans to _make himself better.

Mind you, he might feel that his life is JUST okay as it is now.

pocohantas:


But is he having a problem managing you and people?

If you keep pushing it, you would start giving off mummy vibes and he would begin to resent you. That is if you don’t resent him first.

Big yes!

And No I don't want it to get to the point where resentment steps in, so I think I'll just walk away.

Kobojunkie:
Or you simply didn't understand how important it was to you in a relationship?

Now you realize it is, so what are you going to do about it? Attempt to change him? Accept him as is? Or choose to learn from the experience in hopes you will make better choice when choosing a partner next time?,

It is what it is.

And this whole thing is my fault, I prioritized the wrong things.

missimelda01:

It is what it is.

And this whole thing is my fault, I prioritized the wrong things.

Oh, we all make mistakes from time to time. What matters is how we go about resolving them. In this case, I am at least glad you are least willing to see that he is not so much the problem here.

Amos 3:3 >:

missimelda01:
I would really appreciate matured responses.

I believe personal growth is intentional and when there's no effort, there's little or no improvement.
How do you deal with a partner who's less interested in taking practical steps to grow? (Steps like reading books on personal growth, listening to podcasts, and attending church)

Where is it written that, books make one grow, the people who wrote the book, are they the best people out there? Didn't they make mistake before getting it right? I'm not a fan of reading books for personal growth, it's nonsense to me

There's nothing much you can do.

Look for your partner's interest and start the growth from there. Am talking from experience

missimelda01:
I would really appreciate matured responses.

Attending church?