KingGBsky:
No man is a cheat. Know that and have peace.

Is that to also say that no woman can be a cheat as well?

headbasher96:
no man she has not cheated on me when someone cheat is when i catch u red-handed with a man or a guy thats when i will have something to tell u

Ok, so your galfriend or wife sexting with other men, you are OK with. That's great to know.

Kobojunkie:
What do you mean by the statement in bold though?

What is the difference between cheating and excessive cheating? Does the one hurt less than the other or what?

Hmm again.
A normal man, maybe once in a while nacks. Maybe hangs out with friends, some chicks are there, he takes one to "short time" does one round and is done with it for another few months.
Now I will give you an example of my paddy that is excessive. This guy, there is no day he does not nack at least 2 heavy mama's. They look for him because he is a ladies man. Grown man just over 50 but dances with the agility of a 20 year old. Matured dance.. He sleeps with a chick and she but find him, guess why? He spends minimum 45min licking plate.
All the kids are done with uni so only him and madam in the house. Madam sef don taya and accepted him say every night he must do good time. He is in all the joints from gra Ikeja, to lekki, every other day. Once he enters any joint all the chicks screem his name, they know him. To crown it all, he doee not use condom as he hates it. So he rather carry matured chicks that take care of themselves not smallie.
My guy is excessive.
I assure you this hurts more because it is glaring and open. You don't need that type cause you can see cheating painted all over and there is not much you can do about it.
Both are bad, but the first is manageable, most fall into that category but will deny it.

Kobojunkie:
Ok, so your galfriend or wife sexting with other men, you are OK with. That's great to know.

oga i said yes i am unforgiving so i give people chance to do as they please but when u are caught oga na express u dey o

Says a stupidd dickhead* with a limping....carrot in his.....trousers. You got maturity, how come you don't show it in your comments, youthful exuberance my foot*.

ChoCho54:
You little Cvnt! I'm not your mate okay. Take your youthful exuberance out of my sight and stick it high up in your gully vaginaa!
Swine!

headbasher96:
oga i said yes i am unforgiving so i give people chance to do as they please but when u are caught oga na express u dey o

Ok

Hello Madam, sorry abt what u are going tru in ur marriage but believe me when I say it doesn't worth it by divorcing ur husband. I am speaking 4rm experience as married man myself, I & BAE had lots of issues during d early stage to d point of divorce but we work around it & now we are best of friends. Talk more with ur husband & i am certain he will eventually change for good. Forget those people that know nothing abt marriage giving u bad advice.

ChoCho54:
Sharaaaap dia! You children of nowadays!

The man dey suffer you? E dey abuse you? E dey beat you? Somebody wey una join hands dey build house, simply because he's reacting to the things he sees on TikTok, you want to kee yasef! Foolish geh!

Abeg park out if you want to. Before 2 days, he'd be fuccking those girls on the bed you both shared!

He will so flex your absence ehn..
He will be walking around naked in the house and celebrating his freedom.

After six months, you will finally accept his begging and go back home only to be seeing artificial nails that fell off from God knows who everywhere.

Now you will start buying new bedsheets to replace the old ones because you know the royal rumble that took place on them

Just hear yourself talk!

isholak21:
Hello Madam, sorry abt what u are going tru in ur marriage but believe me when I say it doesn't worth it by divorcing ur husband. I am speaking 4rm experience as married man myself, I & BAE had lots of issues during d early stage to d point of divorce but we work around it & now we are best of friends. Talk more with ur husband & i am certain he will eventually change for good. Forget those people that know nothing abt marriage giving u bad advice.

If it had been your wife cheating on you in those early stages of your marriage, would you have stayed to talk to her and believed in your relationship as you suggest today?

Madam eeeh , if I may advice you, sit down there and establish yourself in that house as a phenomenal that your husband cannot dare look in the face to tell such. Stop being a baby you're married , behave like a matter " anything that has life and occupy space" grow up and stop complaining.

If you ask your mum what her face saw with your daddy, you will just shake your head. Do not unravel what you cannot stop, rather work on the weaknesses he complained about. Madam kiss your husband while having s ex with him, you're still young and he is also full of energy and still young too, if I may guess. Stop being too spiritual with your love life in your matrimonial home.

Lastly men are naturally polygamous in nature, stop checking his phone and pray for God to make him grow responsible fast.

Cheerycherry:
Good evening family landers, I created this account because of this and I need advice from people that have been married for a while.

I've been married for almost 3 years now and we were in a relationship for more than 6 years before then.

Since I married my husband, I've noticed that he's an emotional cheat so to speak. One time I stumbled upon a chat with a girl saying things like if I catch you I will wound you with d ick.

When I bring it up he will tell me he was joking and even swear with his life that he will never cheat on me he's just joking.

Earlier this year, I stumbled upon his chat with a girl who I happened to know as well, a very young girl sending his shirtless pics and asking her if she knows how to ride d ick well if she can kiss and suck his whatever well.

Asides this, he sent her money up to 13,000 in the space of a week while he kept telling me he had no money and I was managing my personal money to run stuff.

He apologised and said its because I don't kiss him when we have s ex and he didn't even intend meeting the girl that it was him catching cruise.

This week again I stumbled upon his chat with another girl, he has known this girl for a while tho and I've met her too. He sent her a message saying Je ki n do e kara e bale in yoruba which means let me f uck you let your body calm down. I've been mad since I saw this one cos he apologised and afterwards said he was just joking.

I'm tired of the disrespect the whole nonsense brings to me and I'm considering leaving. I have a well paying job, I take care of my personal expenses and send money to my parents and siblings myself and we have a child together.

It's not s ex cos we have sex not less than 2-3 times a week; very satisfying s ex.

I need inputs from married people please.
We have an ongoing building project together which we are both sponsoring 50:50. I'm not an uptight person at all, I talk, I make jokes, I'm not boring!

Truth be told, he hasn't been cool with his actions. I will not want you to leave your home because of this. I believe you can talk this out amicably look for a way to know why he is hurting you. Ask questions again and again.
Please don't pack out of your home coa of this

lagosrd:
Lastly men are naturally polygamous in nature, stop checking his phone and pray for God to make him grow responsible fast.

Then can't it be said that women who also can cheat are naturally polyandrous by nature?

She is already aware or her husband's cheating on her. Will her no longer checking his phone erase that or the fact that she is aware the cheating most likely continues regardless of whether she checks or not?

Princewell2012:


What if he guy doesn't mean any of those words? He might be joking anyway maybe trying to get at his wife, otherwise he will password his phone. Believe me he might truly be joking with it. He intensionally want his wife to see it. There are one or two reasons why he is behaving that way which the op might not want to disclose here.

He is only preparing the mind of his wife for what may likely happen so that when it actually happens and she discovers, she wont be overwhelmed with the shock. Do you think when such a guy eventually sees a free offer of pucccy to fvucck, he wont take his chance?

LatentEnergy007:
Stop checking your husband's phone if you don't want to die before your time.
Know this and know peace forever.

The lie that ignorance is bliss is what got Nigeria and Nigerians to where they are today. Would you describe any of that as peaceful?

Ile ti JESU ba ngbe, ile alayo ni. Ile ti Esu ba ngbe, ile ekun, ose, iranu, ese, sina, imotipara, agbere, irede oru ni, ati bebe lo...

Oh

Kobojunkie:
Ok, so even though marriage is a union of two becoming one, to live a peaceful life, they each do so separately?

A cheating partner is not peaceful with his/her life and until such individual brings themselves to the sword there’s obviously nothing to work together on unless the other partner is ready to inflict a feeling of insecurity on him/herself

Kobojunkie:
Then can't it be said that women who also can cheat are naturally polyandrous by nature?

She is already aware or her husband's cheating on her. Will her no longer checking his phone erase that or the fact that she is aware the cheating most likely continues regardless of whether she checks or not?

I quite agree with you but she needs to settle her head down first. Her problem is not perculiar to her. Looking at her husband's phone will only make her see what she is not suppose to see. What you don't see doesn't irritate you.

While working on his other weaknesses by any methods she plans to use, she should also bear it in mind that marriage is not for revenge purposes. We live Ina society where what men does can be categorized while what women does can be stereotyped and could be turned into a stigma. Thanks patience and wisdom is required.

Pimine:

Aswearugaaad

I always pity women girls like you. You think you have it all figured out but you don't know shịt.

Men and women don't show love the same way. You end it with a man who loves you because he slept with a girl he doesnt give a shịt about, only to end up with another man who's gonna do the same. Try that your advice at home and find your ass on the streets where you belong in less than 2secs.

What's good for the goose is also good for the gander... How do you justify a man leaving the woman he 'loves' to sleep with any random lady he doesn't even care about I am right in saying men are that way, they just sleep around for what exactly

Yet with your childish mind, you would send a wife who only paid you back to the streets.... For your your mind oh... That's if you married a jobless poor lady that your type love to marry so you can treat them like poo and turn them to glorified house slaves

Klass99:


Majority of them are like that with their texts/chats (especially those middle aged ones, that mid-life crisis is worrying) that is why you see them guard their phones with their lives and practically dive for it, when wifey comes within inches of it.

All the married men I know personally have confessed that they were caught and found out via their phones/chats. I look at them sideways like , with all the time and energy you put into cheating, you don't have the common sense to delete your messages and wipe the phone clean of all traces?

I honestly think all their sense is situated between their legs. But, they are forever claiming logical.

This must come from a lady

lagosrd:


I quite agree with you but she needs to settle her head down first. Her problem is not perculiar to her. Looking at her husband's phone will only make her see what she is not suppose to see. What you don't see doesn't irritate you.

While working on his other weaknesses by any methods she plans to use, she should also bear it in mind that marriage is not for revenge purposes. We live Ina society where what men does can be categorized while what women does can be stereotyped and could be turned into a stigma. Thanks patience and wisdom is required.

Like she should be patient while he infects her with any disease he cares to contract with his philandering? Women don suffer abeg!

Will you ever advice any man whose wife cheats to take it easy and be patient? The black man treats a woman so poorly it beats my imagination why they're that way

Kobojunkie:
Then why are you here, wickedly mind you,suggesting this woman ignore the sexts and pretend it is all a prank?

God said something about doing to others as we would they do to us... but here you conveniently belittle another's pain only to then reveal that you wouldn't have as much patience in the same situation as she seems to.

Exactly!

The problem in this country and others like us is that even maritally, there are laws that men can break at will while the wife must understand and be patient but she can't even think of adultery not to talk of doing same. Till he brings her diseases and heartaches that will make her have stroke/ heart attack.

And they're the first to blame Buhari for his nepotism.. we're not yet ready or serious as a people to remove double standards in all areas, then this imbalance will clear off and we'll have a healthy nation once more

Omotosho1090905:
A cheating partner is not peaceful with his/her life and until such individual brings themselves to the sword there’s obviously nothing to work together on unless the other partner is ready to inflict a feeling of insecurity on him/herself

The question again is how does one have peace in what is a failed relationship?,

lagosrd:
I quite agree with you but she needs to settle her head down first. Her problem is not perculiar to her. Looking at her husband's phone will only make her see what she is not suppose to see. What you don't see doesn't irritate you.

While working on his other weaknesses by any methods she plans to use, she should also bear it in mind that marriage is not for revenge purposes. We live In a society where what men does can be categorized while what women does can be stereotyped and could be turned into a stigma. Thanks patience and wisdom is required.

I understand that looking at her husband's phone will not get her back the happy marriage she thought she had, but also looking will not do the same, neither will it make the elephant in the room disappear. That problem will remain an irritant whether she sees it again or not, so let's stop making things up. There is no way ot erasing what she already knows of.

What men does can be categorized while that done by women can be stereotyped? I don't follow.

She feels, rightly her marriage has failed, and wonders what to do next about it. Why should she be burdened with thoughts about society and stereotypes?

talk2hb1:

[s] I guess this is your own side of the story, rereading through your post it's like you are not doing something right or you are not listening to him either perhaps you guys are not being honest with each other. He wants something, talk to him from your Heart, let him express his desire. If you listen to him and he expresses his desires and fantasies negotiate with him, he is your husband you know him than anyone else. You should have his mumu button. He is not a cheat, he is just a wannabe [/s]

A trashy husband or wife will always be, don't try to blame their partners for their irresponsibility

Cheerycherry:
Good evening family landers, I created this account because of this and I need advice from people that have been married for a while.

I've been married for almost 3 years now and we were in a relationship for more than 6 years before then.

Since I married my husband, I've noticed that he's an emotional cheat so to speak. One time I stumbled upon a chat with a girl saying things like if I catch you I will wound you with d ick.

When I bring it up he will tell me he was joking and even swear with his life that he will never cheat on me he's just joking.

Earlier this year, I stumbled upon his chat with a girl who I happened to know as well, a very young girl sending his shirtless pics and asking her if she knows how to ride d ick well if she can kiss and suck his whatever well.

Asides this, he sent her money up to 13,000 in the space of a week while he kept telling me he had no money and I was managing my personal money to run stuff.

He apologised and said its because I don't kiss him when we have s ex and he didn't even intend meeting the girl that it was him catching cruise.

This week again I stumbled upon his chat with another girl, he has known this girl for a while tho and I've met her too. He sent her a message saying Je ki n do e kara e bale in yoruba which means let me f uck you let your body calm down. I've been mad since I saw this one cos he apologised and afterwards said he was just joking.

I'm tired of the disrespect the whole nonsense brings to me and I'm considering leaving. I have a well paying job, I take care of my personal expenses and send money to my parents and siblings myself and we have a child together.

It's not s ex cos we have sex not less than 2-3 times a week; very satisfying s ex.

I need inputs from married people please.
We have an ongoing building project together which we are both sponsoring 50:50. I'm not an uptight person at all, I talk, I make jokes, I'm not boring!

Stop looking at his phone. Keep on encouraging him. The truth is men are cheat.

Cheerycherry:
Good evening family landers, I created this account because of this and I need advice from people that have been married for a while.

I've been married for almost 3 years now and we were in a relationship for more than 6 years before then.

Since I married my husband, I've noticed that he's an emotional cheat so to speak. One time I stumbled upon a chat with a girl saying things like if I catch you I will wound you with d ick.

When I bring it up he will tell me he was joking and even swear with his life that he will never cheat on me he's just joking.

Earlier this year, I stumbled upon his chat with a girl who I happened to know as well, a very young girl sending his shirtless pics and asking her if she knows how to ride d ick well if she can kiss and suck his whatever well.

Asides this, he sent her money up to 13,000 in the space of a week while he kept telling me he had no money and I was managing my personal money to run stuff.

He apologised and said its because I don't kiss him when we have s ex and he didn't even intend meeting the girl that it was him catching cruise.

This week again I stumbled upon his chat with another girl, he has known this girl for a while tho and I've met her too. He sent her a message saying Je ki n do e kara e bale in yoruba which means let me f uck you let your body calm down. I've been mad since I saw this one cos he apologised and afterwards said he was just joking.

I'm tired of the disrespect the whole nonsense brings to me and I'm considering leaving. I have a well paying job, I take care of my personal expenses and send money to my parents and siblings myself and we have a child together.

It's not s ex cos we have sex not less than 2-3 times a week; very satisfying s ex.

I need inputs from married people please.
We have an ongoing building project together which we are both sponsoring 50:50. I'm not an uptight person at all, I talk, I make jokes, I'm not boring!

If you are a Christian look at the Bible to seeing how great men cheated including Abraham. Quit looking at his phone and encourage him. Be calm and sbmissive but well dressed.

dalass:


What's good for the goose is also good for the gander... How do you justify a man leaving the woman he 'loves' to sleep with any random lady he doesn't even care about I am right in saying men are that way, they just sleep around for what exactly

Yet with your childish mind, you would send a wife who only paid you back to the streets.... For your your mind oh... That's if you married a jobless poor lady that your type love to marry so you can treat them like poo and turn them to glorified house slaves

Aswearugaaad

Like I said earlier, your first mistake is thinking that men and women are the same.
Be a woman and quit trying to act like a man. If you fụck around, you're a slụt and no man's gonna keep you. But if you insist, Go get a cat and marry your job.

Kobojunkie:
I understand that looking at her husband's phone will not get her back the happy marriage she thought she had, but also looking will not do the same, neither will it make the elephant in the room disappear. That problem will remain an irritant whether she sees it again or not, so let's stop making things up. There is no way ot erasing what she already knows of.

What men does can be categorized while that done by women can be stereotyped? I don't follow.

She feels, rightly her marriage has failed, and wonders what to do next about it. Why should she be burdened with thoughts about society and stereotypes?

My dear, that marriage has not failed. There are bound to be issues in marriage and the party ability to mange it is the key to the success here. Wise ladies end up enjoying their marriage. A man is born to stray and eventually go home but if wisdom and patience is not applied by the woman she will be the greatest loser.

If she is dying of seeing dirty chats in the husband's phone what if she catches the husband nake*d on her matrimonial bed with another lady? Will she kill herself. Where she wants to go to is not a sure paradise. They may be worse with other stuffs she may not be able to cope with.

It's important we balance things up and support same in prayers. See I have a case in my hand now . The wife is just feed up cos the husband sold virtually everything he has and got himself grounded without carrying the lady along. We don't even know if he is gambling or so . Patience and prayer is the key

I will advice you to stop checking his phone, and also start saving up some good amount of money for the future. Bcus very soon, u might get the shocker of ur life, and if u are not standing strong financially, it will throw u off balance. Ur husband is cheating already, that's a fact. So you just try ur best save up good amount of money and prepare ur mind for d wrist.

lilvicky68:
You better stop checking your husband's phone unless you want to lose weight.

You mean she should stop stumbling and watch her step.

nedekid:
Hmm.
See, if you think your husband has not or will never cheat on you, then you are living in fantasy land. The same applies with your wife. The issue is that you pray it is not excessive. This is the fact, but people look at it as impossible.

Please can you clarify the bolded?Out of curiosity.
Do you have any experience in it?