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He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. - Romance (5) - Nairaland

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Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by jeromestarks: 3:41pm On Sep 19, 2022
kelspinall:
freestyle him..if he can't respect your child
Why should he respect her son?
Why can't she look for the father of the bastard child?
She needs someone to pickup her mistake. The man sef stupid for having anything serious with a single mother.

4 Likes

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Watinhapen(m): 3:41pm On Sep 19, 2022
This right here is the problem with dating or marrying a single mother. A man needs to be extra careful with everything he does around the child and how he talks to the child. Everything the man does to the child will always be reasoned far by the mother. If the child is yours, you can talk to the child anyhow you want and no one will scrutinize you. It’s very difficult to date a single mother. I really commend men that date or marry single mothers.

5 Likes

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by fof1: 3:41pm On Sep 19, 2022
MaryAye:
I met this guy where I normally get my fruits for biz. We got talking and exchanged contact.

He seems to be a nice guy but when I told him I had a son and narrated the circumstances behind his birth and my life, he told me he was cool with it.

Of lately, I noticed he talks ills of my son and assume it's a joke. I will try to shade it off but he repeated it again after the church service yesterday.

I'm considering giving him a chance because he's cool but his singular act of insulting and shouting at my son when he comes to my shop seem to disturb me.

Please, do you think his behaviour is a red flag or not?


Yes it is...He is impatient with ur Son's Malfeasance...How old is ur Son is what Matters,Pls. If the Young Man is interested in You, HE MUST BE INTERESTED IN UR SONS UPBRINGING, DEVELOPMENT AND MATURITY. SO,I will Advice you to Take him on it,Pls. You should know what are his Grudges about ur Son and What are his Solutions...Going Forward. THERE IS SOMETHING HE IS SEEING THAT U ARE NOT SEEING AS A MOTHER...SOAKED IN D LOVE OF HER ONLY SON. TALK WITH FRANKLY AND SORT IT OUT,PLS. God Bless You All.

1 Like

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Lama70(m): 3:42pm On Sep 19, 2022
Zee0007:
He doesn't hate him, probably the guy is seeing some behaviours about the boy that you easily condole. As a man, he knows if your boy persist with such behaviour, he will be doom.

I think you should sit down with him and discuss what is the rationale behind his act towards the boy. A simple communication with him will clarify most of your assumptions.

It's not always easy to love such kids except you have some level of maturity.

Even your friends can taunt you for marrying or going out with after one. I have experienced it before.
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by frog12: 3:44pm On Sep 19, 2022
so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Eagleeyex: 3:46pm On Sep 19, 2022
The hand writing is clean and clear if he truely love you he should love everything about you and care about everything about you too
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by frozen70(f): 3:46pm On Sep 19, 2022
MaryAye:
I met this guy where I normally get my fruits for biz. We got talking and exchanged contact.

He seems to be a nice guy but when I told him I had a son and narrated the circumstances behind his birth and my life, he told me he was cool with it.

Of lately, I noticed he talks ills of my son and assume it's a joke. I will try to shade it off but he repeated it again after the church service yesterday.

I'm considering giving him a chance because he's cool but his singular act of insulting and shouting at my son when he comes to my shop seem to disturb me.

Please, do you think his behaviour is a red flag or not?

That's not a supportive partner

Any man that can't tolerate your son is not in love with you dont get deceived

He actually came for your money as he has seen that you are a struggling woman

Just let him go by the time you dont allow him to have you he will go

Your child is all you have
A man that will love you will accept your child with love and tender care

1 Like

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Eaglefine(f): 3:46pm On Sep 19, 2022
MaryAye:
I met this guy where I normally get my fruits for biz. We got talking and exchanged contact.

He seems to be a nice guy but when I told him I had a son and narrated the circumstances behind his birth and my life, he told me he was cool with it.

Of lately, I noticed he talks ills of my son and assume it's a joke. I will try to shade it off but he repeated it again after the church service yesterday.

I'm considering giving him a chance because he's cool but his singular act of insulting and shouting at my son when he comes to my shop seem to disturb me.

Please, do you think his behaviour is a red flag or not?

Run for your dear life.

1 Like

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by appliedscience(m): 3:47pm On Sep 19, 2022
WatchYourSix:


What do you mean by talk ill, insult or shout at your son....?? Give example....

Im asking because this your complain is one of the reasons men dont date single mothers...

..because their behavior or style of relating or even playing around their lovers kid is always under high and biased scrutiny....they will awlays be walking careful and not be free because of what may get the mother angry

.if it was his real father that shouted at him you probably wont see it as he doesnt like his own your kid...you will just feel he's a strict dad or being funny...

My aunt calls her own 6 year old daughter sisi kpelebe and enú já wire, becos the daughter is very slim and talks alot....yet an outsider dares not make such remarks or related about her daughter if you dont want to see her madness...

dont get me wrong i ddnt say you shouldn't look out for red flags ...i'm just saying u should be ready for things like this if u want to bring an outaider into your sons life....

the same way you will beat your son.....if an outsider does same...u will go ballastic... so u have to learn when to identify when its not a big deal and when to enter beast mode against an actual threat if you dont want to push your suitors away
Great!!! Realy great !!!
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Lama70(m): 3:47pm On Sep 19, 2022
MaryAye:
I met this guy where I normally get my fruits for biz. We got talking and exchanged contact.

He seems to be a nice guy but when I told him I had a son and narrated the circumstances behind his birth and my life, he told me he was cool with it.

Of lately, I noticed he talks ills of my son and assume it's a joke. I will try to shade it off but he repeated it again after the church service yesterday.

I'm considering giving him a chance because he's cool but his singular act of insulting and shouting at my son when he comes to my shop seem to disturb me.

Please, do you think his behaviour is a red flag or not?

Madam, I forgot to add that you prioritize your son's wellbeing regarding education and and morals.

It wasn't like this in the days of our forefathers. God will gladden your heart. Don't worry.

1 Like

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by newguy1(m): 3:48pm On Sep 19, 2022
MaryAye:
I met this guy where I normally get my fruits for biz. We got talking and exchanged contact.

He seems to be a nice guy but when I told him I had a son and narrated the circumstances behind his birth and my life, he told me he was cool with it.

Of lately, I noticed he talks ills of my son and assume it's a joke. I will try to shade it off but he repeated it again after the church service yesterday.

I'm considering giving him a chance because he's cool but his singular act of insulting and shouting at my son when he comes to my shop seem to disturb me.

Please, do you think his behaviour is a red flag or not?
70percent of men will do this even if the case was reverse it will be the same. I have been seeing and still experiencing it from a close female friend of mine with her husband n that does mean the guy is a bad person. U see it’s very difficult for people esp in Nigeria to love someone else baby not even their spouse. See I know what am talking about in this situation. My advice for u see have the mind set that u will do the very best to train ur kid urself n if u like the man n u think u love him give him a chance but if u are waiting on a man that will love ur kid before u get entangled u will definitely live a regret life because some men will pretend to like ur kid just to be with u. FYI that my female friend fiancé dem was so nice to d kid even buying gift but after marriage he changed towards the kid but he does every other things for his wife except for the kid. I have other stories like this but what d other one did was send the boy at age 18 to the Uk because she was seeing the attitude been shown to her son.

3 Likes

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Oceanjagaban: 3:51pm On Sep 19, 2022
Dj play me "last last" by Burna boy ft Celine dion
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by frog12: 3:53pm On Sep 19, 2022
so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by frog12: 3:53pm On Sep 19, 2022
so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by frog12: 3:54pm On Sep 19, 2022
so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by kingjiss: 3:55pm On Sep 19, 2022
Mufakirnaqdiun:
Leave the dude abeg,you either choose between your son's wellbeing or an idiot who probably needs you for sex.

This is a red flag oo,make e no be say one day the guy go try hurt your kid oo.


It's also a red flag to marry a single mother,he should leave that second hand cloth go buy new one
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Feelings79: 3:58pm On Sep 19, 2022
WatchYourSix:


What do you mean by talk ill, insult or shout at your son....?? Give example....

Im asking because this your complain is one of the reasons men dont date single mothers...

..because their behavior or style of relating or even playing around their lovers kid is always under high and biased scrutiny....they will awlays be walking careful and not be free because of what may get the mother angry

.if it was his real father that shouted at him you probably wont see it as he doesnt like his own your kid...you will just feel he's a strict dad or being funny...

My aunt calls her own 6 year old daughter sisi kpelebe and enú já wire, becos the daughter is very slim and talks alot....yet an outsider dares not make such remarks or related about her daughter if you dont want to see her madness...

dont get me wrong i ddnt say you shouldn't look out for red flags ...i'm just saying u should be ready for things like this if u want to bring an outaider into your sons life....

the same way you will beat your son.....if an outsider does same...u will go ballastic... so u have to learn when to identify when its not a big deal and when to enter beast mode against an actual threat if you dont want to push your suitors away
You make a lot of sense.l dated two single mothers and had a similar experience with what you highlighted in your post.If you do want to have it good with your single mom lover, you just keep saying and doing all kinds of good t
about their kids.An attempt to point out one or two issues that are not right with their kids is seen as "wickedness","rejection" or "hate"

1 Like

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by RomanGreen: 3:58pm On Sep 19, 2022
WatchYourSix:


What do you mean by talk ill, insult or shout at your son....?? Give example....

Im asking because this your complain is one of the reasons men dont date single mothers...

..because their behavior or style of relating or even playing around their lovers kid is always under high and biased scrutiny....they will awlays be walking careful and not be free because of what may get the mother angry

.if it was his real father that shouted at him you probably wont see it as he doesnt like his own your kid...you will just feel he's a strict dad or being funny...

My aunt calls her own 6 year old daughter sisi kpelebe and enú já wire, becos the daughter is very slim and talks alot....yet an outsider dares not make such remarks or related about her daughter if you dont want to see her madness...

dont get me wrong i ddnt say you shouldn't look out for red flags ...i'm just saying u should be ready for things like this if u want to bring an outaider into your sons life....

the same way you will beat your son.....if an outsider does same...u will go ballastic... so u have to learn when to identify when its not a big deal and when to enter beast mode against an actual threat if you dont want to push your suitors away

You are very correct. It's really hard dating single mothers for these reasons you mentioned, have been there before and it's terrible the kind of scrutiny they give you coz of their child and their view about men is mostly toxic as they'll always judge you by the mistakes of their ex.

Single mothers are better left alone except there's a man willing to deal with all the unnecessary drama every now and then

3 Likes

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Trustedapparel(m): 4:01pm On Sep 19, 2022
MaryAye:
I met this guy where I normally get my fruits for biz. We got talking and exchanged contact.

He seems to be a nice guy but when I told him I had a son and narrated the circumstances behind his birth and my life, he told me he was cool with it.

Of lately, I noticed he talks ills of my son and assume it's a joke. I will try to shade it off but he repeated it again after the church service yesterday.

I'm considering giving him a chance because he's cool but his singular act of insulting and shouting at my son when he comes to my shop seem to disturb me.

Please, do you think his behaviour is a red flag or not?
y are you forcing the young man to like your bastard son Didn't that. Your bastard son has a father ? Send that your bastard son to his father.....if you want to marry......all this virginerians with manipulative agenda self........

1 Like

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by WatchYourSix: 4:02pm On Sep 19, 2022
Majesty33:
Thank you so much for this assertion. You wise and i appreciate you for this statement. Actually i am in love with a single mother and she loves me back but have refused to ask her out cos of her son. The little boy is so so rude, finds it difficult to correct him cos of his mom and since i wouldnt want his issue to cause trouble in our friendship, i decided to just watch and ignore.

U will always have that problem .... if u spank or scold her child ...she will vex ....something she wouldn't vex about if you are the real dad....in your house you'll be threading carefully and not be free......in fact the issues can show up in many ways......

Let me share this story....My uncle married a single mother that brought her daughter into the marriage a few years ago ........
university time (2 years ago) they did jamb same year...they couldnt afford private univeristy for both of them...so he wanted to pay for his own kid (my nephew) that the other girl should wait till they can raise more money .
...it was this matter that ended the marriage... .the woman was saying my uncle doesnt see her daughter as his own...that if anybody should wait it should be my nephew cos her daughter is 2 1/2 years older.... my uncle said it this has always been the issue from the beginning.... accusing him of not treating her daughter well over small issues.....my uncle said at some point he avoids the girl completely until they separated.

3 Likes

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Minjim: 4:02pm On Sep 19, 2022
Of cos it's a red flag.
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Minjim: 4:03pm On Sep 19, 2022
Trustedapparel:
y are you forcing the young man to like your bastard son Didn't that. Your bastard son has a father ? Send that your bastard son to his father.....if you want to marry......all this virginerians with manipulative agenda self........


Cut her some slack.


The boy has a father, she didn't say she doesn't know whom the father is.

Some of you trolls self
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by ericmor: 4:04pm On Sep 19, 2022
doggedfighter:
Why date someone that doesn't like your son?




How can he be a nice guy and hate on an innocent child?


If he can talk ill of your son and shouts on him in your presence, what will he do to that child in your absence?


Don't let your need for a man becloud your reasoning.



.

is not just the need for a man but the money. Ladies no dey get sense when they see money. If you people like talk from now till tomorrow, the lady will still go ahead with the guy as long as the guy they drop thinking she will handle the son situation

1 Like

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by ericmor: 4:09pm On Sep 19, 2022
frog12:
so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

so you want to give him a CHANCE? a chance at what exactly grin

if you like, type a million time, she will not listen only if the guy hurt her or refuse to do the needful financially or bed thing. Those people no dey hear word, met so many of them
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by frog12: 4:14pm On Sep 19, 2022
wetin this one dey talk ? be clear so everybody fit learn !!

ericmor:


if you like, type a million time, she will not listen only if the guy hurt her or refuse to do the needful financially or bed thing. Those people no dey hear word, met so many of them
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by bigcee(m): 4:16pm On Sep 19, 2022
Zee0007:
He doesn't hate him, probably the guy is seeing some behaviours about the boy that you easily condole. As a man, he knows if your boy persist with such behaviour, he will be doom.

I think you should sit down with him and discuss what is the rationale behind his act towards the boy. A simple communication with him will clarify most of your assumptions.
Una done start rubb!sh again.

Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by MurphyInc(m): 4:17pm On Sep 19, 2022
You said the guy is nice to you and he doesnt like your kid? What exactly is he complaining about your. Maybe you over pampering the boy and making it look like the boy is taking his attention off him. Most men dont like over pampered kids. The guy cant just choose not to like your child, ask him why.
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Majesty33(m): 4:18pm On Sep 19, 2022
WatchYourSix:


U will always have that problem .... if u spank or scold her child ...she will vex ....something she wouldn't vex about if you are the real dad....in your house you'll be threading carefully and not be free......in fact the issues can show up in many ways......

Let me share this story....My uncle married a single mother that brought her daughter into the marriage a few years ago ........
university time (2 years ago) they did jamb same year...they couldnt afford private univeristy for both of them...so he wanted to pay for his own kid (my nephew) that the other girl should wait till they can raise more money .
...it was this matter that ended the marriage... .the woman was saying my uncle doesnt see her daughter as his own...that if anybody should wait it should be my nephew cos her daughter is 2 1/2 years older.... my uncle said it this has always been the issue from the beginning.... accusing him of not treating her daughter well over small issues.....my uncle said at some point he avoids the girl completely until they separated. Hmm, u can imagine and if u watch, those single mothers getting married these days are very very few and most times its by luck cos so many men just bang them for fun and move on.



Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by Level12: 4:19pm On Sep 19, 2022
[Best advice so far.quote author=Zee0007 post=116810342] He doesn't hate him, probably the guy is seeing some behaviours about the boy that you easily condole. As a man, he knows if your boy persist with such behaviour, he will be doom.

I think you should sit down with him and discuss what is the rationale behind his act towards the boy. A simple communication with him will clarify most of your assumptions. [/quote]
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by 540niyilolawa: 4:21pm On Sep 19, 2022
Make I bring groundnut?lolMake I bring groundnut?lol...
Re: He Wants To Date, But He Doesn't Like My Son. by creepsyme(f): 4:23pm On Sep 19, 2022
MaryAye:
I met this guy where I normally get my fruits for biz. We got talking and exchanged contact.

He seems to be a nice guy but when I told him I had a son and narrated the circumstances behind his birth and my life, he told me he was cool with it.

Of lately, I noticed he talks ills of my son and assume it's a joke. I will try to shade it off but he repeated it again after the church service yesterday.

I'm considering giving him a chance because he's cool but his singular act of insulting and shouting at my son when he comes to my shop seem to disturb me.

Please, do you think his behaviour is a red flag or not?
Did you consider if your son is ill behaved?

1 Like

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