Marriage i necessary and its working for a lot of couples who really stand by their vows.
@poster , i believe you are surrounded with peoples with failed relationships and marriage,thats why you dont believe in marriage.but i ll urge you to look for couples with happy marriage so that your orientation can change.Cos whatever you believe will work for you

Marriage is good because it is the foundation of every society, take a look at the african american society and you will see the importance of marriage, the AA society is in ruins because of lack of marriage. Marriage is not a necessity but it is very important because family forms the building units of the larger society.

To me marriage is not necessary if u can't be happy in it, if u get the right patner then go ahead, if not ,

whether we like it or not not everybody on planet earth is going to marry. so all this fuss doesn't really matter. what matter most is; do u hav the desire to be married - the just go for it! By the way am STILL SINGLE AND SEARCHING

1cor7:6
, I say this by way of concession, not of command. I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own specail gift from God.

1 cor 7:8

To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is well for them to remain single as I do. But if they cannot excercise self control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to be aflame with passion.

Paul one of the greatest apostles never married so I am positive that marriage though good is not compuslory even in the eyes of God.

hello,God is the author of marriage and he said that he made every thing good, so therefore marriage is an agreement binding between two people and the two must agree and what is meant by agreement is that they vow to be with one another at all times so therefore for marriage to be enjoyed the two parties have to have a good relationship with christ and not only that before going into marriage i will advice them to go through a proper councelling section and at least try to attend one or two or more marriage seminer that will also help not to regret and do things right. Marriage is so sweet just do it God's way and stay blessed.

hi,

marriage is RELEVANTLY NECESSARY.
Ordained by God but rubbished by man
I advice u find a mate , marry n work it.if u dont work it, it will not work.why go thr d stress if u aint ready 2 work it.If u work it, u will still enjoy what our parents enjoyed.
see u @ d altar soon.

A friend of mine once told me that marriage is the worst thing that has ever happened to humanity. He went further to explain that if you dont marry,people especially your parents will start to see it as arbnormal. They will never allow you rest until you get married, then later, when you bring complains to them about the marriage, they will plainly ask you to manage or you can now see what we see or it is not easy my son, what ever that happens, just stay there, people see worst things. Then, when they know its like this, why did they persuade the person to marry. For Christ sake, its not a must. Christ and most of his followers did not marry. Please, lets not marry because others are marrying, lets marry because that is what we actually want. It does not take only love to sustain a marriage, it takes maturity and patience. All married couple has stories to tell. If one or two people can open up, you will ask the person what he or she is still doing there. Our society does not support divorce and Single life. It effect women mostly as African women are subjected to what i see mostly as slavery. Go to villages and see how mothers live, you will cry for them. Its not a do or die affair, lets all be careful before entering into that union as it is the hardest institution one can indulge in

People no longer respect matrimony, the fear of God is no more there
The major problem that is causing drift, unhappiness, seperation and even divorce
is infidelity.
A man is cheating on his wife and would expect her to still repect, love and care for him
despite his irresponsibilities. Isnt that cruel?
A man wouldnt mind sacrificing everything he has or would have on the alter of adultery
isn't that strange?
A bird inside wants to fly out and the birds outside wants to fly in
If you are not sure, its better you dont go into it or you will regret you ever did

@ Poster

No Marriage is not necessary, but happiness is,
It is better to have a Boyfriend who loves u for the rest of ur life than to have a husband who does not know ur worth

cecegorz:

@poster
@Oziomatv

Commitment-shy people are afraid, and will always be afraid of marriage. it's just that u don't want to be responsible to a steady family. responsibility is the key word.

marriage is not for selfish irresponsible people who will want to enjoy all the benefits of marriage outside of it. tell yourself the truth!
Take it or leave it, if u don't want to marry don't go near the opposite sex for conjugals or else it will hook you in the throat one day. If u make yourself an Eunuch, good for you. stop being a hypocrite!

Sorry for some ladies who spend their youth frolicking with all manner of men, only to go beyond marriageable age and then start castigating marriages. You can't eat your cakes and have it, u know.

 you amazed me.

Emad:

@ Poster

No Marriage is not necessary, but happiness is,
It is better to have a Boyfriend who loves u for the rest of your life than to have a husband who does not know your worth

Your one of the most reasonable member in this forum.

Well, i am not yet married but because i am human, i know my bible and because i know God very soon, i shall get married and my marriage is going to be heaven on earth .
Marriage is a very beautiful institution that every huma being should look forward to getting into.
it seems many of us do not regard the institutuion at all
I feel we should look at marriages that work but not the ones that are having issues and if we have to lets learn from their mistakes
If you are a xtian you will always live by what the bible says
God says in his words that He will not make you go thru what you can not bear
Even when you r having it rough, trust God, talk to Him and take it to the Lord in prayer and believe me , He will see you thru and your marriage will be heaven on earth
Marriages work.

Its just a neccessary evil that only divine help keeps together,otherwise d institution is overrated & dead

marriage is not necessary, but it is good. we should all know that marriage is not a bed of roses so when getting married we should be realistic. its also good for companionship! believe me u dont want to get old alone! and again we should all have a positive attitude we should say to our selves if other peopls marriage is falling, mine will not and actually work towards it. as for me i intend to get married someday atleast have sum1 by my side!

No Marriage is not necessary, but happiness is,
It is better to have a Boyfriend who loves u for the rest of your life than to have a husband who does not know your worth

simple!


to sum,its necessary and to sum it is not!. .

For me oohh, Marraige is very necessary indeed.
My momsie and popsie are still together and they have been fab role models for an enduring marraige, I too expect this for myself.  I dont want to become a statistic or just be given the sad title of 'baby mother', It's also about an expectation of my worth, to be a wife and not just a standard girlfriend. Indeed my ideals have much to do with my Nigerian culture, thus upbringing. All of which I will be passing on to my children.  

:Dif u folllow d scriptures, then the enjoy 'doing' without the guilt trips then marriage becomes necessary unless u can remain like apostle Paul

but seriously, i think its bn rubbished by we humans, if people r as dedicated in their marriages as they r in other endeavors like careers, then things wld b different,
more importantly, many people enter it with different expectations,
but sincerely, if u find the right man , it is paradise on earth- my parents r an example- d love, commitment and dedication to eachother stil amazes me,
i also prayed to have such a rlnship, and so far with my hubby, i am so incredibly happy am scared

finally, the key is prayer

:-x

AFTER READING SOME OF THE POSTS ON THIS TOPIC IT'S SO OBVIOUS A LOT OF PEOPLE DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT MARRIAGE IS ALL ABOUT. FIRST OFF, THE ONLY THING THAT IS NECESSARY TO PROMPT AND SUSTAIN A MARRIAGE IS LOVE, PURE AND SIMPLE. AND WHEN I SAY LOVE I DON'T MEAN THE TYPE PEOPLE MOUTH OFF ALL THE TIME TO EACH OTHER BUT THE REAL THING, WHICH IS EVERLASTING.
UNFORTUNATELY THIS ONE THING THAT IS SO ESSENTIAL TO TRUE HAPPINESS ON EARTH IS EXTREMELY RARE, EVEN THOUGH EVERY ONE CLAIMS TO LOVE THESE DAYS. TRUE LOVE EMBODIES ALL OTHER QUALITIES, TRUST, UNDERSTANDING, COMMITMENT, FAITHFULNESS, ETC, AND THE ONLY KIND OF MARRIAGE VALID BEFORE GOD IS ONE BASED ON TRUE LOVE, EVERY OTHER IS A SHAM. PEOPLE THESE DAYS MARRY FOR ALL THE WRONG REASONS, THAT'S WHY THERE ARE SO MANY CYNICS ON THE TOPIC OF MARRIAGE, BECAUSE IT HAS LOST IT'S MEANING. THERE IS ABSOLUTELY NO POINT IN GETTING MARRIED IF BOTH PARTNERS ARE NOT GENUINELY IN LOVE, NEITHER DOES IT MAKE SENSE TO REMAIN IN A MARRIAGE THAT BRINGS ONLY MISERY. I HAVE BEEN A PASSIVE MEMBER OF THIS FORUM TILL NOW. I JUST LIKE READING VARIOUS POSTS AND HAVING A GOOD LAUGH, BUT THIS IS ONE SERIOUS TOPIC I FELT I OUGHT TO LEND MY VOICE.
ANYWAY, THAT'S THAT. LATER GUYS N GALS.

@ POSTER.

ME SELF AM CONFUSE!

MARRAIGE IS A SERIOUS BUSINESS OH. THOUGH IT IS BEAUTIFUL ALSO A TRUE REFLECTION OF GOD'S COVENANT WITH US.
U HAVE 2 MAKE SURE THAT THE PERSON U ARE COMMITTING THE REST OF UR LIFE TO, DESERVE IT.

MARRIAGE IS ALSO A PATNERSHIP OH.

/

Marriage is necessary for our culture but it is not necessary to me as a person and if i was to chose between me and the nigerian culture, then f***k the nigerian culture. Nigerian culture for marriage is all about the fancy wedding, engagement, gifts, gossips and adoration and bragging say "my pikin don marry". After the ovation photo shoot, the real wahala starts and the Nigerian culture quietly slips out of your life and leave you to your problems.

The naggings, fights, cheatings, lack of children, feeding, success, competition, comparing whose a better person if he or she had chosen another person other than their spouse and a host of other rubbish associated with marriage.

Women usually push men to get married quickly because of their ego and societial intrusion into their lives and most men are not ready to get married quickly because of the economic burden associated with it. As for me, i prefer to just date and enjoy yourself while it lasts and move on after some months. Life is too short to spend your whole life with one person. You dont know what you might have missed by staying with one person and after 7 years you begin to regret that choice.

it is not necessary, u can equally love someone without marrying them. the ring doesn't make a difference

@ OMO IBO said
u see we nigerians pick the passage of the bible that most suits us or defines the situation we are in. can all these people that quote the bible give me one verse where it says marriage is compulsory?

to the best of my knowledge, the bible encourages marriage but no where in the bible did it make it compulsory.

na wa for our naija people

Omo Ibo many Nigerians will tell you that God ordained one man one wife. Where did God make such a commandment? Ask them to read Deut 21:15. God is making a law for the Israelites and he starts the law by saying “if a man have two wives”

Two wives. This is God speaking not man. The God who created man is giving him laws by which to live. In the eyes of God  for a man to have more than one wife is natural. Loving one of those wives more than the other is also natural. That is why God gave this law.

Ladies ask your pastors to explain the meaning of this verse. And please tell your pastors that they should not avoid the explanation by saying “that is the old testament”. However if they insist on saying that God’s views of marriage as given in Deut 21:15 are from the old testament and that people should only obey the precepts given in the new testament by Paul who is a man , then ask them to explain why they the pastors preach and force their congregations to obey Leviticus 27: 30 which says that people should pay “tithes” .

Is paying of tithes not in the old testament?

Nigerian culture for marriage is all about the fancy wedding, engagement, gifts, gossips and adoration and bragging say "my pikin don marry". After the ovation photo shoot, the real wahala starts and the Nigerian culture quietly slips out of your life and leave you to your problems.

The naggings, fights, cheatings, lack of children, feeding, success, competition, comparing whose a better person if he or she had chosen another person other than their spouse and a host of other rubbish associated with marriage.

Lawyer
Make i tell you, the very same thing happens in America. After all nay copy copy we de copy America. Even sef na de bad bad things we de copy from America. That so called famous US of A that u people flaunt in our faces. Them too get "a host of many rubbish associated with marriage." Infact why do so many American marriages end in divorce? All the hype about pre nups ,divorce, alimony and all that.

Maybe marriage isnt necessary after all. We need to change our ways . Let us Make Nigeria a Better Place

I took a class a couple of months ago and marriage was defined as:

"a contract made with the state that makes each spouse the next-of-kin, & spells out details such as the obligation to sexual exclusivity, inheritance rights, the division of property & financial support."

This definition alone says a lot, so i guess in the US, marriage is a contract.

not very neccessary (but important) the society makes it so now,

ojuju_cala:



Lawyer
Make i tell you, the very same thing happens in America. After all nay copy copy we de copy America. Even sef na de bad bad things we de copy from America. That so called famous US of A that u people flaunt in our faces. Them too get "a host of many rubbish associated with marriage." Infact why do so many American marriages end in divorce? All the hype about pre nups ,divorce, alimony and all that.

Maybe marriage isnt necessary after all. We need to change our ways . Let us Make Nigeria a Better Place

Marriage is a sacred institution that must not be defiled.
God's word,"He who findeth a good wife findeth a good thing", However the quote didnt end there,It has a promise attached to it", and obtaineth favours from God".HIS(GOD's) word is YES and AMEN .so the only way to obtain this particular type of favour fom GOD is by getting married.
@poster
Am pretty sure ur mum obtained this favour,and ure a livin testimony.
Go out there and be positive,life in marriage is not as bad as u picture it u know!
@all the ladies
If our modern day ladies would take a pause for a moment,take a look at our mums,maybe they'll come with a clue as to what went wrong.

That's my bit.CHEERS

Hi all,
Marriage is necessary ok but our culture has got it all wrong ok.It involves two who are compactable and open with each other.Most couples nowadays are not always open with each other,they have a lot of things hidden within them.As for me most marriages I see are Economic Marriages and not of love.I have resolved not to marry if its not the rite person cos i respect the institution called Marriage and God.Look at Gbenga Obasanjo weddin just less than 5yrs it has hit the rocks and many others who are married but divorced.