AyobamiOluwole:
So this girl has been coming to my place, eat the best food and all that. I've asked her if she has a boyfriend and she said no. I do give her money without asking her for anything on return because I could see she is not the lazy type and she is really hardworking. I am very much ok with finances and I see no issues with some of her demands.


Yesterday I called her and told her that I'm not happy and that I need cuddle only and not sex(I lost so much Dollars from futures trading that night). She later called and said she will come to my place for that reason. In my mind I was thinking this will go down as sex and all, but I don't really want sex.

All I just needed is someone to cuddle and get distracted with that's all. This is the only time I am demanding something from her.

So she came during the evening time, and later that night we went to supermarket and I got her something's to eat at home for the night. We got back home and everything was going well. We were both on the bed when I reminded her why she came. This is someone I've been doing quite a lot for without even thinking twice out of pity. She wouldn't give in and wouldn't let me know why she can't just allow me to cuddle her.

Mehn, from the loss I had earlier and all that, I got infuriated and called another girl telling to pls come over for the night. Then I told this girl to leave my house since she can be that selfish. I sent her out of my house around 10pm. She was telling me she doesn't have money to go home, I didn't care and I shut my door against her. Though I was scared letting her out on that road and that time of the night but my anger got the better part of me. It was later after getting over the whole thing I confirmed nothing happened to her from someone else.

Pls is there anything wrong with what I did?

Modified: Anger is a bad thing. I am wrong sending her away at that time of the night. This is probably the judgement I'll get 😔

I wanted to blame you severely for endangering her life because if anything had happened to that lady, what you would feel would be 10 times more than what you feel for your loss in trade. Secondly, you are obviously her last caller, and she must have told at least a friend that she was going to your house, so you are the main suspect for whatever happens to her. However, going through the comments, I can see that you are remorseful, so let's let sleeping dogs lie. I don't blame those who have already blamed themselves a lot.

Now let me get straight to what I wish to tell you.

You have a quick temper, quick but bad. I understand how you already feel, and I know that people react to things differently. For instance, there is a person who would just say, "Wow, you know, that's why I needed you here at this moment. You should have just told me that you can't do it and stayed back home," and that would be the end of it.

Work on your temper before it gets you into trouble, and while on it, find other things besides cuddling that will make you feel better when you lose. That way, you will not face multiple disappointments. Humans will always disappoint you.

Work on your anger, bro. You know, once you master your feelings, both the ones you feel in your heart and your prick, once you can control them, you become a god.

Finally, that lady came for cuddling and was ready to cuddle until you reminded her why she was in your house. Don't do it again.

Next time she comes for cuddling and is already in bed with you. Just stop talking and cuddle.

For coming over and chatting with you alone is enough to get over your sorrow, not cuddling or penetrating her which was your utmost intention. You appeared like a beast

Thank you all for your well thought-out advice. Some feel what I did is right with regards to her not keeping up with her agreement some feel otherwise. But majority agrees that it is not the right thing to send her out at that time of the night.
For some saying I wanted sex, I swear down that I wasn't in any mood to have sex with my frustrating situation. I simply needed comfort or whatever name I could call it. Most importantly my anger is so bad that I can be heartless unnecessarily.

I regret doing that and I am begining to get over the whole thing since she is alive and nothing happened to her. I have learnt my lessons.

I sent her WhatsApp messages apologizing since she refused to pick my calls but she replied with insults. After that, I have deleted her number and our chats and hopefully her chapter is closed and life goes on.

Thanks once again guys ✌️

AyobamiOluwole:
So this girl has been coming to my place, eat the best food and all that. I've asked her if she has a boyfriend and she said no. I do give her money without asking her for anything on return because I could see she is not the lazy type and she is really hardworking. I am very much ok with finances and I see no issues with some of her demands.


Yesterday I called her and told her that I'm not happy and that I need cuddle only and not sex(I lost so much Dollars from futures trading that night). She later called and said she will come to my place for that reason. In my mind I was thinking this will go down as sex and all, but I don't really want sex.

All I just needed is someone to cuddle and get distracted with that's all. This is the only time I am demanding something from her.

So she came during the evening time, and later that night we went to supermarket and I got her something's to eat at home for the night. We got back home and everything was going well. We were both on the bed when I reminded her why she came. This is someone I've been doing quite a lot for without even thinking twice out of pity. She wouldn't give in and wouldn't let me know why she can't just allow me to cuddle her.

Mehn, from the loss I had earlier and all that, I got infuriated and called another girl telling to pls come over for the night. Then I told this girl to leave my house since she can be that selfish. I sent her out of my house around 10pm. She was telling me she doesn't have money to go home, I didn't care and I shut my door against her. Though I was scared letting her out on that road and that time of the night but my anger got the better part of me. It was later after getting over the whole thing I confirmed nothing happened to her from someone else.

Pls is there anything wrong with what I did?

Modified: Anger is a bad thing. I am wrong sending her away at that time of the night. This is probably the judgment I'll get 😔

You are very selfish and wicked for sending her away during that unholy hour of the night. What is the guarantee that the cuddling won't lead to something else? You are very funny.

AyobamiOluwole:
So this girl has been coming to my place, eat the best food and all that. I've asked her if she has a boyfriend and she said no. I do give her money without asking her for anything on return because I could see she is not the lazy type and she is really hardworking. I am very much ok with finances and I see no issues with some of her demands.


Yesterday I called her and told her that I'm not happy and that I need cuddle only and not sex(I lost so much Dollars from futures trading that night). She later called and said she will come to my place for that reason. In my mind I was thinking this will go down as sex and all, but I don't really want sex.

All I just needed is someone to cuddle and get distracted with that's all. This is the only time I am demanding something from her.

So she came during the evening time, and later that night we went to supermarket and I got her something's to eat at home for the night. We got back home and everything was going well. We were both on the bed when I reminded her why she came. This is someone I've been doing quite a lot for without even thinking twice out of pity. She wouldn't give in and wouldn't let me know why she can't just allow me to cuddle her.

Mehn, from the loss I had earlier and all that, I got infuriated and called another girl telling to pls come over for the night. Then I told this girl to leave my house since she can be that selfish. I sent her out of my house around 10pm. She was telling me she doesn't have money to go home, I didn't care and I shut my door against her. Though I was scared letting her out on that road and that time of the night but my anger got the better part of me. It was later after getting over the whole thing I confirmed nothing happened to her from someone else.

Pls is there anything wrong with what I did?

Modified: Anger is a bad thing. I am wrong sending her away at that time of the night. This is probably the judgement I'll get 😔

You no serious!
Why didn't you ask her out formally and stop pretending. If she accept fine, if she doesn't then you move on and stop doing favour for her. She might think you just want to be using her to pass time.

folake4u:


Cuddling? I saw that part.
I want you to answer me truthfully.

Do you cuddle your female friends when you're emotionally down?

Wouldn't you feel weird if any of your female friend tells you a fellow male friend was down and she went over to cuddle hima.

I hope you're aware that cuddling is an affectionate/intimate/prolonged type of hug.

If he really wants a cuddle, let him define the "relationship" he has with the girl. Period!

Agreement is agreement. Good and fine. But there was no contract signed for such, she has every right to back out.

It is also dishonest of him not to define the relationship with the girl. I totally understand what was running through the girl's mind. She doesn't want to be "anybody's fool".

Exactly. All girls don't like to be "anybody's fool" but will love other men to be foolish for them.

The op is the fool here for doing all favors without getting something in return.

Personally i don't do favors for girls. Why?

Some get entitled and demand more favors while some see sex as the only best compensation they can give you.

I could only do favor for you if I'm absolutely sure there could be something tangible i could possibly get,whether now or in the future. Nobi one kind mumu sex.

eddynaira125:
You have done Well sir, please Kindly accept the New title called NONSIMP Man of the year

A simp. Can do this too

folake4u:


Must you people sleep with all female acquaintance that visit?

All these comments are because of unearned entitlements mindset
Follow the storyline
At this point you are clowning my love

horia:


Follow the storyline
At this point you are clowning

You're the one clowning actually. Don't flip it on me.

folake4u:


You're the one clowning actually. Don't flip it on me.

Ok

Badmashiii:


Exactly. All girls don't like to be "anybody's fool" but will love other men to be foolish for them.

The op is the fool here for doing all favors without getting something in return.

Personally i don't do favors for girls. Why?

Some get entitled and demand more favors while some see sex as the only best compensation they can give you.

I could only do favor for you if I'm absolutely sure there could be something tangible i could possibly get,whether now or in the future. Nobi one kind mumu sex.

If you do favours for people without expecting sex in return, that is absolutely fine.

folake4u:


If you do favours for people without expecting sex in return, that is absolutely fine.

Exactly. i must be sure of getting something valuable in return before i could consider doing favor for anybody. Man or woman.

And on my scale of values,"pussy" ranks among the lowest.

Badmashiii:


Exactly. i must be sure of getting something valuable in return before i could consider doing favor for anybody. Man or woman.

And on my scale of values,"pussy" ranks among the lowest.

Sex is cheap. Can be gotten anywhere and everywhere.

Wise choice.

If anything happens to her or get apprehended by security force on the road, just believe your apartment isn't safe for you

Hmmmmmm. You did well and the right thing

In all, you both didn't commit any sin. She agreed to come for that reason and refused to do it.

It's good you let her go.

God.

Op your matter get as e bi. Do you want relationship with the 'said' lady.... Yes Or No.

funkemary:


So the girl should just assume things in her head that this guy is interested in her without the guy saying anything of the sort just because he gives her stipends

Sheh you know the handwriting are written on the wall that this said guy only wanted her for the night and there is every possibility that it won't stop after one night. She is wise not to accept fling that has no direction

Then why did she go to the house when the guy clearly told her he wanted to cuddle? He didn't leave anything for the girl to assume. He told her what he wanted and she agreed!

It's like you don't understand the meaning of cuddle. The guy wanted romance ni! He wanted them to be lovey dovey in each others arms and the girl came! Is that not asking for trouble?

obi58:


Then why did she go to the house when the guy clearly told her he wanted to cuddle? He didn't leave anything for the girl to assume. He told her what he wanted and she agreed!

It's like you don't understand the meaning of cuddle. The guy wanted romance ni! He wanted them to be lovey dovey in each others arms and the girl came! Is that not asking for trouble?

I got it perfectly well. Remember this is not the first time she's coming over without them having anything together. I'm sure if he had spoken well she'd have willingly agree to whatever he wants

Don't hurt any woman in such a manner again.

Love her above your emotions.

The woman is a mother figure to you.

you fuckkkkked up big time, first you didn't bring in romance from the onset of knowing her while you kept giving her the just friends vibes.

how can you just tell a person you've not banggged before or had any form of intimacy to come to your house and give you cuddle? you could have called the other options you have to come and satisfy your needs

the girl too Na Mumu....if Na me I won't come.

if you want to keep a girl as just a friend do it and don't compromise it. to knack the girl dey hungry you and you come dey treat am as sister

folake4u:


C
If he really wants a cuddle, let him define the "relationship" he has with the girl. Period!

Agreement is agreement. Good and fine. But there was no contract signed for such, she has every right to back out.

It is also dishonest of him not to define the relationship with the girl. I totally understand what was running through the girl's mind. She doesn't want to be "anybody's fool".

On this topic, we agree to disagree.

Gerrard59:


On this topic, we agree to disagree.

Okay then.

AndrewTate:
thanks a lot for your observation. God bless you too 🙏🏾

Amen and you

Kindly remember that many people especially females are very manipulative and Selfish...They will do all to lead you on to their advantage ,collect all they can and still not share themselves with you . This is very common especially amongst single females .

I guess you now realize who the joke is on?

obi58:


You're joking right? If he feels like buying stuff, he should buy gifts and send to his parents who sacrificed to raise him or better still go to the nearest motherless babies home and invest!

If anything the girl should be the one apologising for leading him on! From the onset she should have clearly defined the rules of engagement and let the boy decide if he wanted to continue with this weird relationship/friendship thingy.

thomasjoe:

Kindly remember that many people especially females are very manipulative and Selfish...They will do all to lead you on to their advantage ,collect all they can and still not share themselves with you . This is very common especially amongst single females .

I guess you now realize who the joke is on?

Well I guess the joke is on the girl because she was kicked out into the cold without transport fare and a replacement called in pronto

AyobamiOluwole:


You are right. I only felt it was not too much to ask for.

Guy, no let anyone whyne you.
Let her fxck away. She's a parasite. She was aware of what you called her for. Sorry for the funds you have thrown away on the parasite.

You are a big fxxl as well for feeling like a 7 year old prxck.

UnknownQueen:


Mr Noah, well base on my experience and perspective of things , that might not be true..
Reading through the O.P's story gave me nostalgic feelings as it took me down memory lanes.
When I was quit young, (i.e B4 marriage), I strongly made up my mind , I won't have sex before wedding, it was so strong that for all the guys I dated, the worse I had with some of them was light romance, even after having a proper introduction with my then fiance (now husband), and he wanted to ......, I rebuffed him vehemently and asked that he wait till the D-day, so this might just be the case with the girl.
Although, I would excuse the part where she collected his gifts , knew what she was coming for and then chicken out at the last min, but on another note, there's no girl who doesn't accept gift, I accepted a lots of gift during those era..
I think it's just natural and cultural for girls to be spoilt silly by their friends or boyfriends of the opposite sex....

Could you please interpret?

AyobamiOluwole:
Thank you all for your well thought-out advice. Some feel what I did is right with regards to her not keeping up with her agreement some feel otherwise. But majority agrees that it is not the right thing to send her out at that time of the night.
For some saying I wanted sex, I swear down that I wasn't in any mood to have sex with my frustrating situation. I simply needed comfort or whatever name I could call it. Most importantly my anger is so bad that I can be heartless unnecessarily.

I regret doing that and I am begining to get over the whole thing since she is alive and nothing happened to her. I have learnt my lessons.

I sent her WhatsApp messages apologizing since she refused to pick my calls but she replied with insults. After that, I have deleted her number and our chats and hopefully her chapter is closed and life goes on.

Thanks once again guys ✌️

Oponu ni Iwo boyi seh. Omo walori bed pelu Ee, you reminded her about the schedule but she declined because she knows you to be a phooL. You still dey call her For what?

[quote author=Chukerokeke90 post=129078297][/quote]

Chukerokeke90 abeg go and rest. We know the tribal jingoists in chief in Nigeria ☹️