why should you expect a guy to do all the calling? If you love him I bet you wont allow him do that. What a guy needs most is maximum care and not someone expecting him to do everything after the chase.

It's quite simple actually. The answer can be found even at Yankari Game Reserve. Don't laugh, I am serious:

Any hungry carnivore takes the time to survey his/her prey, stalking, watching, licking lips, planning, etc. Such a carnivore then spends all their energy to chase their prey. Atimes, they catch one atimes they don't and live for another day. Once they do catch a prey however, they relish in the victory, hoarding the meat to themselves till they have had their fill, saving up some for their offspring and then once totally satisfied, they leave the carcass there for the scavengers.

Folks, it's that basic of basic drive that makes "the chase" interesting. Has anyone ever wandered why even a cat will not even touch a dead animal, no matter how hungry the cat may be? It isn't interesting. It's boring. There is pride (at least for me) in enjoying something I actually worked for. It's a basic instinct folks, pure and simple.

Lesson to the ladies:
If you have any self-respect, you will save yourself for your wedding day. Whereby you can't do that, at least let the guy prove himself before giving yourself to him. Don't fall for peer pressure or what you see on TV. In other words, no matter how "cute" or "sexy" or whatever, no matter how expensive he may look, don't jump in the sack on the first day. Trust me, the man will have more respect for you if you make him work for it. By the same token, if you aren't interested, just say so and move on. Don't get the man worked up in the process. This is most likely when hit-and-run is likely to take place. Tease the guy, but don't take it too far.

Again using my analogy, even any carnivore will lose interest if they spend all their time chasing one herbivore.

I don’t know why it happens, I have lost interest too after spending time, money and some precious weeks of my life. Looking back I can only say we were not being true to each other, the motive was wrong from the onset.

But digressing a bit, playing hard to get is a woman’s defense response to test the sincerity of any man showing interest in her. Whether this works is not the issue here, but in a society where most men are wrongly socialized into seeing every woman as a ‘intimacy gadget’ such a response should be seen as normal.
Just follow the post of some guys here and you will agree with me. Now it is not largely the fault of these men, but that doesn’t make it right.

On the other hand there are women who while playing hard to get see through their ‘stalkers’ and know that they are not sincere but they alternate between flashing red and green light the same time. These sisters reinforce the notion in men that the longer you act ‘you will win’

My advice to sisters – this is for those who want permanent relationship – let marriage be the proof that he really loves you, nothing more nothing less. If you don’t like him then firmly reject his favors or you might get yourself into owing a debt that has to be paid.

@my2cents- very strange way of looking at it, however i agree with your lesson to the ladies, rite on spot.

my own is dat i heardly finish my moves with a new babe,i could b veri interested but wen i start getting d green lite,i jus back out,i mean b4 sex,i ve about 10 on finished business like dat but d bad thing is dat my thinks i sleep with old d babes in ph,pls help

Lola,

Thanks. Sometimes, you have to speak in parables to get your point across.

that is another question that i have been longing to get an answer!

Most guys just want to use a lady and dump her afterwards, there is no other reason.

After they get what the want, you are done with, they go for the next available chick.

It's in their blood.

It's only God that will save us!!

they lose interest because another sweet toto dey shine around them

his_grace:

once oko don enter obo - what else?

are u always this tactless? U are an annoying recurring decimal on nairaland.

@poster
Well, i think the reason has been reiterated by most guys on this thread. Law of diminshing return sets in after the achievement.
It's up too the two people involved to ensure that the spark is kept glowing afterward especially if the relationship ends up in marriage.

True Talk

When i was wiv ma ex. in 9ja then. 1 day i called her at evening and asked why she haven't called me. she said she hasn't got credit on his fone so i sent her a top up of N1,000.00 but after some mins all i could get was please call me. Lol.  Let me tell u ppl the truth. if it those men who ain't busy that will keep on chasing a girl. when i started chasing her, i was less busy.i mean i worked from home but after some months i started getting jobs from friends outta the state. so the whole call was reduced, was it ma fault?

haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa @poster, Na me you dey use style to talk to abi? ok,

ogb5, as said it all

Girls go back and read wht 'ogb5' said,

For most of of we guys that are corporate, we get missed calls alot and not from only our chic but friends, family and associate.

most times ladies are not patience. they ring your phone anytime they like and when you don't pick its a problem. why would you call me during business hours? most times in a meeting, training or attending to plenty task on my table.

if you call the guy later in the day around 6pm till 12pm and he did not pick the phone then its another case

When i was wiv ma ex. in 9ja then. 1 day i called her at evening and asked why she haven't called me. she said she hasn't got credit on his fone so i sent her a top up of N1,000.00 but after some mins all i could get was please call me. Lol.  Let me tell u ppl the truth. if it those men who ain't busy that will keep on chasing a girl. when i started chasing her, i was less busy.i mean i worked from home but after some months i started getting jobs from friends outta the state. so the whole call was reduced, was it ma fault?

During the chase,girls put up a lot of not-so-nice behaviour which the guy is supposed to condone if "he's really serious".We all know that no two people are perfect 4 each other except adjustments to each other are made.many girls find it hard to adjust and they look 4 a guy who will accept them"for who they are" including rudeness,an uncaring attitude, selfishness and all what not.which the guy is supposed to condone,"if he is really serious".Wake up!No man wants dat 4 an extended period,talk more of a lifetime.U dont know details of what a guy does for a living or how his finances are,yet to get u he must bleed naira!he has to be able to "take care of you",right?Many girls think their looks or their body is an incredible wonderful and all that a man can ever dream of,and so he should b grateful n worship to get it,without remembering that no matter how wonderful something is,u get used to it over time.so if dats all u have 2 offer,then a guy has 2 move ahead when he needs an understanding woman beside him.Truth is dat most guys after gettin the girl,are now exposed to the real girl and begin to wonder whether she was worth all d stress in the final analysis.Worst of all,some girls xpect the guy to continue putting up with all the stress!Na wa o!U cant even have a decent conversation with a higher percentage of girls!I once told a girl that intelligent girls were becoming an endangered species and she got angry,but that doesnt change the truth!The truth is that society now,has made girls to develop an unwritten creed:"LOOK GOOD AND ALL OTHER THINGS SHALL BE ADDED UNTO YOU".So most girls just develop thier bodies at the expense of thier minds,cos it has become a short cut,I got more to say but in order not to bore people,and to reduce what the haters are goin to say after i've said this truth!

@vkt3344
Are you asking me No Us? but that's the only way to show her love buy her recharge card everyday "Glo with Pride"

once oko don enter obo - what else

@ uchetobi,
@ kalmebad,
@ cue,
Wiv this 3 ppl i live by. most with uchetobi and cue's post.girls should fink b4 posting any msg on here and some guys should do that as well. Women are our helper not our burden.Na only God go save us from there wahala.i'm single and searching though and if i'm to go for any girl i will rather go for a girl like kalmebad, bcuz i think she's mature. Girls show us only 30% love and care and we'll do the rest without complaint i promise.


'' Na God get power over our lives ''

they got what they wanted . . . especially if they got it sooo easily

most esp. jamb exam!

osegwu:

The way you read before an exam is not the same way you read after the Exam. Abi?[/color][color=#990000]

lol

    na jamb cause am!

no one considered, that sometimes some of these girls choke a guy afta they feel that they have won his heart. they begin to  misbehave

To answer this question, we have to look at the man's psychological design. Men who chase women do so mainly because they want to conquer that woman, its an ego thing. The chase would normally cease after sex or when they are convinced they have 'acquired' the girl. This is when the lady now starts her own chasing, policing, crying and all that women mushy mushy stuff women do, just to ensure his attention does not shift.

The fact is that women would always tell you how much they like their man to be romantic and they usually live in this idealistic world of fairy, romantic, 'Mills and Boon' fantasy of what love should look like. Hence one of the reasons women stall is simply to savor the moment, they just love to be chased! (90% of women know if they would agree to date you from the first day of the chase)
The guys also find some satisfaction from the chase, looks forward to the day when he collects his price. Immediately this happens, he usually loses steam, and would only remain if he believes he is getting something out of that relationship, sex, companionship etc.  Now this is where the problem starts, while it was highly satisfying for the guy to send 10 text messages receive only one reply during the chase, the guy now expects three messages in response to his one, when he has conquered.

I grew up with several ladies and I have dated quite a few too, and I hear them say all the time, they want a romantic guy, who buys them roses, calls them all the time thinks of them 26hrs of the day etc, but the reality is that if their men behaved like that, they would soon get tired of him, not value nor respect him, and let me quickly add that no woman can love a man she does not respect. Take time and watch the film 'BEDAZLED' and you would understand

My advice to all the ladies in the chase phase of a relationship is enjoy it, as reality beckons.
For all the ladies in the post-chase phase, you have to add value to your man’s life if you want him to value you (and this goes for men too). Just ask yourself what it is that you are bringing into the relationship, beyond pretty face and sex…what else are you good for? This is what counts! Such things as sound and unselfish advice that would benefit him and his future, financial planning advice, care, do you make him feel big or small?
If you do this, he would always want to be around you…and even if his attention strays, I assure you he would be back!

ojesymsym:

no one considered, that sometimes some of these girls choke a guy after they feel that they have won his heart. they begin to misbehave

Dats d point.

Busta:

they got what they wanted . . . especially if they got it sooo easily

u spoke ma mind.

Relationship is not always sweet.  There are up n downs. . . u as the lady is also suppose to do something to spice up. . .to make it worth keeping on. Some of us ladies think r'ship shd always look like what we read in novels n see in movies. . . hehehe, we gotta both sweat to make things smooth. Shouldn't be one sided.

There's no solution to this topic, no matter how u try to tackle it. I see it as a natural thing, a natural law which might very from human to human.

Its just like when we have it in mind to get a thing (e.g a costly hand set) u've admired so much. U labour to get the money, stress urself to get to where to buy it. But the moment u are in possession of it, it no longer trips u, Just because it has become urs, or because u've realised the functions are not exactly what u want, or because u've seen a better phone which u think could have better functions, or because u r just tired of using the phone.

But not every body looses interest after they've got what they've anticipated. Some actually get what they chase after and cherish it till the value and content of the chased is finished. Even when the object bought has out grown its usefulness we often remember when we had it. "Wonder why we wish some of our clothes we love so much never get faded?

And who ever says when the lady says yes, the chase has ended? many of our ladies need tutorials. To me i believe chasing never ends. Even when u get married it still doesn't end. Get thrills in ur relationship & spice it up. U will end up chasing each other till the end of time. I always tell ladies this, if u've dated & u have an ex and he hasn't at one time or the other wanted u back strongly, then there's something about u that isn't ticking correctly

There's no solution to this topic,

Sorry re you with us?

[size=14pt][/size] Don't you women understand that when a man sees a woman and he starts chasing its not because he thinks "wow this girl is going to stimulate my mind or give me the conversation of a life time" all we see is what you would look like naked or what you might be like in bed. Most hook ups end quickly due to what comes out of the mouth of the woman or if her behavior turns out to be something else other than what we expected. Of course don't get me wrong we men share the faults too but a guy would loose interest if you are one dimensional IE there isn't much more to you than just the fact that you have a phat (pretty hot and tempting) booty or you do some crazy tricks in bed.

Me personally i like a decisive girl someone who can carry a conversation someone who is not looking to be a house wife (not that theres anything wrong with that) etc