Pls oo i have a qustion.is d husband jobless?or he cums back home during offic hour to do the job.cos i kn dat lady dnt stay at office al day.

Thank God i was created a Man.

Why are people blaming the man as if he doesnt have blood running in him ? We all have different level of stimuli when it comes to intimacy .

Is the husband jobless?or he come's during office hour to do job?or at mid-night?asking d lady to give up her job is nt d solution

ITbomb: I always wondered, why was polygamy thrown out of fashion.
It could have solve so many problem and perhaps create some few ones

My kindren. I agree. When a woman (or indeed a man) discovers their partner has been havin an aFfair, they always av one statement in common ie "the hardest part is the deceit or been kept in the dark". I guess wit polygamy, there is no dark. Now raise up ur hand if u r a married man (newly weds exempted) who has never played an away match! Which is better? Impregnating someone ur wife does not know or preparin her in advance. Before devils advocates start typin, I know there is a difference between playing awAy and scoring away.............its called luck! It only takes one shot or one slip of the hand by the goalkeeper 2 score an away goal

Now back 2 the question. Stay and work on ur marriage. Stuff the bank. They will probably send u a sack text durin the next round of Sanusi capitalisation anyway. u need 2 live in the kniwledge that ur husband has a bastard out there bt at the same time consider urself fortunate that he is not plannin 2 marry her and legitimise the child! If u decide 2 leave, well join the ratrace. Even the singles r findin it difficult 2 find eligible and available men not 2 mention divorcees! Goodluck

Does she consider job first and the marriage second? If she still desires the marriage more, well what has happened has happened(mistakes have been made - by her:does she expect her husband to go on sex-fasting for 2 years? and by her husband, for having sex with somebody he is supposed to be protecting). Well 2 wrongs do not make a right. I advise her to keep her marriage.Both of them should make amends, and forgive and forget. i tell u lady ur marriage is more important than a job in which ur freedom is curtailed, because of whatever u think u will get from it. [color=#000099][/color][size=12pt][/size]

Absolute nonsense. When I see these people (especially women) who spend their lives working like slaves and ignoring/missing out on more important things in life, I always feel immense pity for them. You have to ask yourself one important question: Do you live to work, or do you work to live? I assume the latter should be the case for any reasonable person that wants to enjoy life.

I don't think most traditional minded men will tolerate the idea of a wife (a young wife for that matter) who is away at work for 12-14 hours daily - in a bank of all places. Worse still one that is forbidden from getting pregnant for the first two years! Lol. She must be mad to accept that offer and still go ahead to get married. Unless she's married to a nonentity with no self-respect and manly pride, she should either resign from that useless job (regardless of the implications) or 'resign' from her marriage so that she would marry her job fully. Certainly can't have the best of both worlds in this case.

The househelp stuff is even ridiculous. What sort of woman that spends long hours at work would leave a nubile, full-breasted 20 year old house-help at home with her lonely husband? It doesn't make much sense cos I know for sure that Nigerian women are too smart to make that mistake - since they know what they are capable of. Sounds like the story is fake anyway.

A bitter lesson for others like her, becausee marriage is all sacrifice
and aything short of that, then expect the worst. She should either take
the hubby or take her job. Goodluck

why would she employ or allow a 20year old lady as her house help knowing they are newly married. Even if she is always around the man will still fall for it. Especially if the maid was hot.
Anyway i feel her pains. My advice is sh1t happens everyday. Get impregnated by another man..

phadat: The husband is wack hw can you descend so low and have sex with d maid SHM

I cant tel whether u r a lady or a guy, if u r lady i'll pardon ur ignorance of d damage dat can occur wen 'Konji' visits u.

It's a truly sad story n I really feel for d lady,but yl we all rightly hurl invectives n insults at d husband we should not fail to realise that 2men cannot react d same way in a given situation.He complained of lonliness n we don't know how much she did to arrest d situation,she knows him beta Dan anyone so shld have been able to gauge what he might be capable of.
I feel 9ja women shld stop idealizing who dia men are n take them for wat they are as in why would you leave your man who's been complaining of neglect all day week in week out wit a girl maid or not just because you tink he shld b better than that or that it can't happen to u?
Ladies need to be more pragmatic n realistic Wen it comes to dia men.

dacool1: why would she employ or allow a 20year old lady as her house help knowing they are newly married. Even if she is always around the man will still fall for it. Especially if the maid was hot.
Anyway i feel her pains. My advice is shit happens everyday. Get impregnated by another man..

. Guy. One heineken 4 U jor! The couple bleeped up sha. Why employ a 20yr old maid when there are no children to look after cos i wonder what actually d maid 'll be doing dat they cant do themselves. We 'll nt be suprisee if d said maid is d lady's sister. A typical case of a hubby impregnantin his sister-in-law!

~Bluetooth:

You cannot be a successful housewife and a successful careerwoman at the same time.Career women should learn to make sacrifices,everything is not always about money.Family matters sometimes.

Correct guy. You can't have ultimate achievements in both. Life is a balance and wisdom is striking the right one. If am Marco Polo why marry and put someone under duress. The situation is like AS marrying AS then coming to Nairaland with tales of woe. Conventional wisdom says no. Men and women who wish to take their careers to the Zenith better literarily take their spouses along.

In this case the man is clearly wrong and is divorcable (permit) by both church and state but the ball is in her court. If she wants to maintain the jet setting she should cut him loose.

And by the way what is a childless couple doing with a female househelp. What exactly is going on in that household.

Martini101: . Guy. One heineken 4 U jor! The couple bleeped up sha. Why employ a 20yr old maid when there are no children to look after cos i wonder what actually d maid 'll be doing dat they cant do themselves. We 'll nt be suprisee if d said maid is d lady's sister. A typical case of a hubby impregnantin his sister-in-law!

Sincerely i dont see reason(s) for the help. This would be a lesson to all this ladies. But the guy self get him own for body sha.

question: Misleading Front Page Topic : Banker inpregnates house-girl and blames wife for absence

is the man also a banker?

U ar very intelligent,infact u b question true true.misleading topic indeed

Infact one can not stop laffin wt people's funny reply on NL.....anyway d truth of d mata remain dat d lady should not quit her marriage for d fact that ao is she sure she wil get a saint as husband? Cos we guys r birds of same feathers only dat some are wolves among d sheeps...why cant d useless dog use condom or pull out durin d game? or is it dat d lady can not conceive? That d man has to sought out solution else where? Is d lady complaining of tiredness everyday? D fault lies on both of dem even our govt cos what kind of policy is dat one our bankin industries applyin ? Dat is why i can neva marry a lady who is not ready to forget her cert n go into business, cos what ladies r facin in labour market is not fair at all, especially in d bankin industries, manager wil want to eat frm d cake, supervisor wil ask, rich client wil demand for his own just for u to meet up wy target and d job is not even fully cured....let her go bak to d drawin table wt her husband, let d maid be takin care of by d mother inlaw in d village, after givin birth d child wil be taken frm her while she go her way, the banker wil hav to go xtra mile in satisfyin d man always despite d tiredness and neva employ maid. Let d man too repent n tender apology to d wife instead of claimin right, am sure he knew d nature of her job b4 proposin to her, what r they even employin maid for when its only 2 of dem? Dats one of d problem laziness do cause. I rest my case jor.......Glamour T Noni.

How can a woman leave her home as ealry as 7am and comes back late? Just asking

If I was in Nigeria, I would rather be homeless than be a maid.... I mean my head would rather be chopped off. Yea you heard me right.

Well, it may sound knee-jerk, i think she should file for a divorce. Especially if she isn't ready to quit the job. If she decides that they could 'work it out' and she stays with her current job, i bet my left testicle that the husby will impregnate another woman. The guy is clearly one who finds it difficult to keep his balls in his pants and he isn't gonna change tomorrow

Faithlovewinner: Pls oo i have a qustion.is d husband jobless?or he cums back home during offic hour to do the job.cos i kn dat lady dnt stay at office al day.

even an hour is enough for d hubby besides bankers do work late. I wont be suprise sef if she s givin d husband d 'i m tired ' phrase

A married man is not an adolescent. His wive's absence is not an excuse for sleeping with the housegirl without protection and getting her pregnant. I am pretty sure he would have done exactly the same thing if his wife was a full-time housewife. The woman needs to stop blaming herself for her husband's lack of self-control and weak moral constitution. Her marriage is still fairly young and she needs to consider her options without emotions. I strongly doubt that the young marriage can survive this so the woman should consider just chalking up her losses and walking away from the marriage. The lady is still young. She married a spineless man that does not respect her. It's time for her to move on.

ps - i suspect that this story is fake.

Let me advice d unmarried folks here telling d Lady to stay put & endure...dat wuld b d biggest mistake anyone can make in their life, to 'endure' a marriage.
Honestly, its bttr to remain single for life than to stay in a wrong marriage; this one dat they dont have any kids btw them, she shld jst jejely pack her load and waka. Even if d guy 'comes to his senses' & begs, she shld nvr look back cos this incidence will haunt her for life.
Nobody can hav a succesful partnership without time invested, & i'm sorry to say but marriage is especially hard on women, u jst have to choose between marriage/family & a career.

God saved her it happened early in the marriage before she Had her kids. She didnt suddenly become à banker, he allways knew her job. Lady! Pack ur load and run. No kids to stay for, no baggage, leve him and his housegirl girlfriend thats what he deserves!

2buff:

Business, my friend.
It doesn't do well for business to have someone on an important case and then have them go on mat leave half way through.
It stresses any business (and the team involved who also have lives of their own) out.

A way to look at it is, as a new recruit in the army who has to go through some bootcamp tings, do you go and get yourself pregnant and take mat leave?
It means you really don't care about your military career.

Some things require you to make certain sacrifices per time. As long as it is not forever, it's a perfectly reasonable request.
There needs to be communication and understanding between spouses about these things, as I'm sure they did.

NOW THAT BEING SAID...

That doesn't mean you shouldn't have fun with your hubby. Contraception is great for family planning and will come in nicely here.
Hopefully she didn't "turn off" all together, otherwise she would have contributed to the situation a bit.

NOW THAT ALSO BEING SAID...

Her husband is selfish

selfish for what

Infact one can not stop laffin wt people's funny reply on NL.....anyway d truth of d mata remain dat d lady should not quit her marriage for d fact that ao is she sure she wil get a saint as husband? Cos we guys r birds of same feathers only dat some are wolves among d sheeps...why cant d useless dog use condom or pull out durin d game? or is it dat d lady can not conceive? That d man has to sought out solution else where? Is d lady complaining of tiredness everyday? D fault lies on both of dem even our govt cos what kind of policy is dat one our bankin industries applyin ? Dat is why i can neva marry a lady who is not ready to forget her cert n go into business, cos what ladies r facin in labour market is not fair at all, especially in d bankin industries, manager wil want to eat frm d cake, supervisor wil ask, rich client wil demand for his own just for u to meet up wy target and d job is not even fully cured....let her go bak to d drawin table wt her husband, let d maid be takin care of by d mother inlaw in d village, after givin birth d child wil be taken frm her while she go her way, the banker wil hav to go xtra mile in satisfyin d man always despite d tiredness and neva employ maid. Let d man too repent n tender apology to d wife instead of claimin right, am sure he knew d nature of her job b4 proposin to her, what r they even employin maid for when its only 2 of dem? Dats one of d problem laziness do cause. I rest my case jor.......Glamour T Noni.

kheart: How can a woman leave her home as ealry as 7am and comes back late? Just asking

The hubby sure knew this before he married her.

Dear Moderator - Can you please create a creative writing or fiction section , so some posters can fulfill their fantasies there? This story flows like beer parlour jist to me.

If she was always at home he will say he wanted adventure so he got house he lp pregnanT iF she go work he will say she dint sit at home. And mem expect women to cross legs when they travel for long o. I personally know guys who leave theiR wives for one two or more years and travel abroad o. While There they do anything in skirt o but don't exPect their wiVes to have sexual urges or desires. Woman can never be considered a full human by men sha esp african and Asian men.

wow in nigeria they will tell you when to get pregnant?

question: Misleading Front Page Topic : Banker inpregnates house-girl and blames wife for absence

is the man also a banker?

Yeah, good question, content is at variance with front page topic. Mods, keep your game tight!