Celeeeeeeeeeeeee Immagine all the Cheruboom and Serabum. Pastors house and Pastors dress na him dey fine pass, but my poor people them dey live for poor surroundings. Pope dey for Rome, Imam dey for Mecca, Bishop dey for London, My people, how many Amen we go many? My people

hmmm, I pledge to Nigeria my country my candid loyalty

I jump am pass. Not my portion

So even a mad man without mobile phone nor data is a celebrity and more popular than all the nairaland users put together. I cant believe it that everyone on Nairaland is commending and replying a mad man opinion. Aye le o. Eyan ma ni ka o. So now how do we distinguish between the mad men and women here on nairaland

misplacement of priority and misappropriation of public fund

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Wow! This guy is just on point.

misplacement of priority

SOME USEFUL TIPS ON HOW TO REMAIN POOR:
By Adewale O Kelvin.

1. Never wake up early. Keep stretching and turning in bed until you get too hungry to continue dozing. If there are no bed bugs, why hurry to get up?

2. Never plan how to spend your money. Whenever you get money, start spending it right away and when it's finished, you try to count and recall how you spent it.

3. Don't think of saving until you have real big money. How can you save when you earn so little? Those telling you to save are not sympathetic to your burning needs.

4. Don't engage in activities usually reserved for the "uneducated". How can you, a graduate, engage in petty trade, network marketing or home-based production? That's for people who never went to school!

5. Don't think of starting a business until an angel comes from heaven and gives you capital. How do they expect you to invest before you get millions? Even though more than half the businesses in your town were started with little capital, you as a smart person can only start with millions.

6. Complain about everything except your own attitude and laziness. Blame the system, the government and the banks that refused to lend you money. They are all bad and do not want you to get rich.

7. Spend more than you earn. To achieve this, buy consumer products on credit and keep borrowing from friends and employers.

8. Compete in dressing. Make sure you're wearing the latest clothes. Intimidate the congregation with your trendy fashions every day. Whenever your neighbor buys a new phone, you get one that is more expensive.

9. Get yourself a nice second hand car that costs more than three times your yearly salary.

10. Give your children everything they ask for since you're such a loving parent. They should not struggle for anything because you do not want them to suffer that way, they will grow up lazy and hence poor enough to ensure they can't help you at old age.

11. Devote your time, energy and resources to watching football especially EPL, UCL and La Liga. Keep up with all matches, fixtures and transfers. Ensure you adequately argue your points among friends for hours after each game. After all, one day Messi and Ronaldo will remember you and send you some percentages of their income.

12. Stay on Facebook, Twitter, Whatsapp, Instagram, etc., all day to post, share, comment or watch videos. Engage in discussions that add no value to your life just to be seen that you are current and up-to-date. Be hopeful that one day a benevolent spirit will come down to bless you.

Who says it is easy to be poor? it is not easy at all; it requires a lot of concerted effort but mind you, the reward will not always be favourable in the long run. Enjoy been poor, enjoy hoping, dreaming and wishful thinking, enjoy betting your life on luck, baba ijebu and the likes of sport bets and lotto. Enjoy praying 24/7 speaking in tongues praying fire and thunder to come down from heaven more than prophet Elijah did. Enjoy waiting more than the father of faith like Father Abraham, don't worry.

Sit on it and ponder on it like a lame duck until the dollars and manner begins to fall like the hypes of showbiz celebrity. Pardon my sarcastic manner of message. Everyone and everything in life needs tips now. Even tips to make eba, boil rice and how to prepare Indomie. As we quietly sit back and wait for God to descend the stairways of heaven to fix our problems, lets be hopeful since we have now ridiculed God to fix our toilet and have also contracted him as our janitor and mess cleaner. I keep telling people, God will never intervene nor do what you and I must do.

Na wa o, Preaching on Nairaland again? please we need 5000 evangelist in Maiduguri, chinkom and chibok, jos and Benue villages and to the Fulani herds men. Pls volunteers are needed pls we needed

Leave story. Start ur own business today. Stop minding another mans business

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*Abusive Use of Our Mobile Phones And The Amazing Magic and Power of Flashing*

If we endure the patience to read this piece to the end, we will discover that a lot of us do lots of good and bad things with our phones but one of the lots catches the eye and leaves the mouth dumb struck.

We have lots of junk and docile contacts of our phone that most of us leave on the phone for as much as 1yrs, 3yrs 5 years and even till eternity. yes these are people's contacts that we once treasured and held dearly to our heart.

The question is this, are this people dead? No they are not, we are the only ones that grew cold with time like winter dales and hay stacks. Yes we grew cold over the years due to distance or because we don't have instant nor day to day benefit from these people which we once used to enjoy. *"one thing alot of us don't know is this about the use of our mobile phones; not calling people nor flashing people on our mobile contacts for a duration of 6 months literally means they are dead, corpse or literarily insignificant".* Yes exactly what it means for contacts on our phones that we don't call nor flash for 6 months.

Please, if you cant call people on your phone even when they are not so important to you, at least try to flash. Amazingly and psychologically, flashing is more important than calling as it leaves a more lasting memory. More so, everyone can afford to flash but not everyone can afford to call even when the want to, and with a few seconds worth of credit, u can flash all the dead numbers, corpses on your phone to remind them that you acknowledge they are
1. Alive and well
2. Wish them well and to be more hopeful in life and all their aspirations
3. Look forward to seeing them
4. Dearly missed and fondly remembered
5. You love them

Yes flashing does all these magic as our silence speaks more voluminously and vehemently than a million words of poetry and creamy brunet brown of words. Yes strong words are never loud. Flashing does all these magic in one.

Another magical thing about flashing is this, if you flash 100 people, 85% of the flashes will surely call back or flash back, but call 100 people, believe me, no one will probably call back. When next you have to flash, please never be ashamed of the act, do it with pride. Its a good thing.
Amazingly, not flashing active and seemingly active or dormant contact on your phone is an abuse of your phone. If you flash and don't get a flash back nor call withing a week then that contact deserve to be deleted because its an indication the contact is useless and practically playing dead because the same nonchalant attitude will still apply if you were in a critical situation and all you could do is to flash the nonchalant contact.

We are all sensitive people who appreciates the music and rhythm of love.
The world is growing mysteriously and mischievously colder everyday. lets put an end to that cold war and bring down that emotional and defensive wall of Jericho and wall of Berlin. Our culture of love all over the world is been eroded like the rapids and cataracts of the streams and ocean tides day by day and people are becoming less loving nor caring as the year roles by and these is obvious in our homes, families, work environment and atmosphere, relationship, partnership, businesses and in marriages

Please share this wonderful piece with your loved ones. And lets spread this music and gospel of love through flashing your contacts. You can't afford to give all your contact money but flashing almost everyone of us can afford.
Like a roosting bird on a quartz stone in a wall clock, like a gem and sweetest taboo with a big heart as if everyday were Christmas, go on and flash your mobile contacts today.

By Adewale Lawal K. www.winterbaker.com

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9jvirgin:
Why did the British stop slavery for God sake? I have been to Jamaica and the Bahamas and I noticed the Long Term Slavery effects. It helped them.

This country cannot be good unless the British comes back. QUOTE ME ANYWHERE!

Be say ur isrealite for kukuma don remain for egypt istead of perishing in d wilderness be that. u try small

I weak but i no comment

How does this news help d pile of jobless and frustrated and financially exhausted and hopeless Nigerians? I weak for gossip news and it peddlers

I am 100% skeptical about this unsubstantiated news. ISIS can never have a direct link nor common tie with the Nigerian kind of rag tag bandits and terrorist. Its 100% impossible. It could be true that we have sponsors of Jihadism among our Northern political elite as most Muslims have their reservation on this subject. But ISIS from Syria to Nigeria? Theres no way this makes a sense. It is possible they are coming in from Iran, Afghanistan, Pakistan and Iraq as most would trickle in from the porous northern boaders in disguise as the regular business men or boarder marauding bandits

Am laughing in Arabic and Greek at the same time. wonders shall never cease the tongue nor have the tongue parted from the head

Celebs with their fake life and hype of make believe world. Only a dumb fellow will buy this story from a hungry celeb like this one begging for audience

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This is not the solution to solving nor curbing crime in a civilized age. Rushing to the scene to salvage the pillage after the heinous crime is done in the civilized part of the world. what informs these disoriented and frustrated individual should the subject of concern. I fear for the security of the African continent and nations if our security details and approach to solving crime puzzle is not reviewed

Who is the editor or this dumb post We talk about one Nigeria and yet we are still peddling the comparative significance of one state or tribe over the other

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